Saturday, April 30, 2011

The Curse if Done, Almost Getting Back to Fun!

So they say things happen in threes, who ever made that up I'd like to kill with some trees. But today my computer went kaput, thanks to some stupid virus it took. The dumb thing popped up as I was about to click some other site and instead I clicked the virus fright. So after three hours of going through the motions, I finally cleared me of the virus in the file oceans, then poof the documents all disappeared, as if they had been cleared, but it just made them hide, thankfully nothing got fried. Some stupid pop up site is where it came from, I'd like to get a sharp object and shove it up their bum.

At least I didn't step in dog poo in my bare feet, Oh Brian that must not have been neat. At least cats bury their shit, trying not to make you have a fit. Also got a new car the other day, making another payment come my way, but oh well it beats the crap out of my old piece of junk, which is now hopefully in one big hunk. Maybe will put a picture or two up some day, as I rhyme and play. But right now it's off to make sure everything is back to normal with this damn thing, just wanted to give a ring. If you need funny for the day, go over to the WaystationOne bay. As Brian clearly had a fit, one that could rival this rhyming twit, but sorry I still win, even if I have to cheat and pull something out of a garbage bin.

So that is all for now the cat with the new car that is red not green like grass, which will now be used to drive around my little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Thursday, April 28, 2011

Should Have Stayed in Bed, Careful Coming Here Might Explode Your Head!

So today was one of those days when Pat should have stayed at home with the cat, but then if he got out of bed he'd probably have fallen and tripped on a mat. Yes it's been that sort of day, but came here to rhyme for a short stay, before Pat takes back over, as today there was no four leaved clover.

First the stupid car went kaput up the hill to work, as the stupid thing is such a jerk. Then come to find out for a car that's worth a whole one thousand at this point in time, it cost four thousand to fix the piece of shit which is a crime. So if a good river can be found, there might be a big splash sound.

Figures since it was all paid off and such, now I feel the debt touch, as once again a car payment with come, as he goes and looks at some. Isn't that always the way, once you get free and clear of something one day, the damn thing breaks right up the ass, whether or not you fill it with gas. So car shopping should be interesting tomorrow, although the new debt could bring sorrow..haha.

Then as it was about time to find facts, the computer at work went off the tracks. The stupid thing wouldn't work one bit, don't worry there wasn't much of a fit. As it was just very very very boring I must say, but that has come before my way.

So you might want to avoid me like the plague today, as coming by my way, could give you quite the streak of bad luck and you might end up saying f**k, over and over again, like some foul mouthed men. So now I have to scat, giving the computer back to Pat, to see what he wants to buy, I only wish I were telling a lie. So today I might sound a bit crass, but you still love my little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Wednesday, April 27, 2011

This Could Go All Wrong But I'll Still Zoom Along!

So in between oh so great work, the time I take to lurk, the facts and plugging here, there, everywhere for all the acts, a rather interesting idea popped into my head, when really I should have a nap in my bed. Stay up late, get up early, might make one quite squirrely. At least Betsy could say she had a friend, as her yard squirrel watches as she types at My Five Men to no end.

Once again Brian from WaystationOne got me in the mood for a little rant, as the seeds he did plant. Of course The Silver Fox can rant up and down, but it seems he knows quite a bit about being a vampire which gives me a scary frown. Maybe in that lair, he does more than ruffle Orson's hair.

Then of course I had a visit, finally, from the Tales of Tashtoo, I think that was well past due. But then she made two, so I guess that makes up for all her time in the loo. Whoops was I supposed to keep that to myself, it could be bad considering we're one the same continental shelf. Look the plugs all at the start, I can just be so smart. So now to the harder work I decided to try, if it doesn't work we'll blame it on that Pat guy.

Face, Facts, Faith

Promise, Preach, Praise
Disgust, Dismantle, Delays

Cheques, Chips, Cash
Slash, Smash, Stash

Deals, Dug, Done
Spun, Shun, Stun

Golf, Goods, Glory
Shake, Splurge, Story

Informative, Initiative, Ideals
Admission, Apprehension, Appeals

Courage, Court, Claim
Balk, Bury, Blame

Enlighten, Enlist, Exclaim
Retort, Revamp, Reclaim

Happy, Honor, Health
Worry, War, Wealth

Gifts, Glad, Grandeur
Pucker, Plague, Poor

Face, Facts, Faith
Liar, Lore, Lost

There is my indirect rant, that Brian did plant. So of course it might make less sense if you haven't seen his post from yesterday, but I'm sure you did go by his way, as he's everywhere, the cat must swear. So it wasn't hard to see what I wanted to try, if you can't you might need a new eye. As it all ends in my typical rhyme, but a new hump I tried to climb, using the same letter at the start, yes I know I'm state of the art. So if you like to pretend your big and bad and squashing others under your shoe makes you glad, as you mingle with the upper class, you can kiss my little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Tuesday, April 26, 2011

It Had To Be Done, Time For Movie Fun!

So I've been threatening to do what I did with song titles the other week with movies to prove I'm quite sleek. Yes I know you all already knew that, as the cat gets more attention than poor Pat. At least over here, as with my usual cheer. So now I'm going to see, how many movies can be remembered off hand by me. Can you keep up with that cat? Or will you fall flat?

So I hope I don't Die Hard today
In a Major League way
Then my visitors will no longer be in Hot Pursuit
To Stakeout my blog listening to me rhyme and toot
As they might ignore and go Homeward Bound
Having Nothing to Lose by not being found

Did you know you can get it at Porky's they say
One day Serendipity might send you that way
Snow Dogs can stay in the cold
Although Turner and Hooch need to be told
Those Critters lie about
And they move Fast and Furious no doubt

I've never seen a Beverly Hills Cop
For when I tried Coming to America I was told to stop
But I guess that is the Life
A Midnight Run might cause you strife
Unless you can go Back to the Future whenever you want
But then a Ghost might haunt

Then who you gonna call?
Of course it be Ghostbusters to your stall.
So I guess some would get busy living or get busy dying
As a Shawshank Redemption they'd need and I'm not lying
Or maybe they need some Adventures in Babsitting to clear their mind
When dealing with Bad Boys you never know what you'll find

Or it could be the Dawn of the Dead
Of course that might be a Mission Impossible that could hurt the head
Then The Dream Team would have to assemble
Beetlejuice or Batman I swear one guy did resemble
Or maybe I'm just Gung Ho
As a K-9 is no where near my show

If one were I might Scream
Or throw him out in Rush Hour to get a butt ream
Would that make me a Predator then
Or just a Chicken Run avoiding men
Maybe I should be on The Road To El Dorado soon
As then I could pull a Life Stinks and rhyme like a loon

Betsy did you see that Bird on a Wire
One Short Circuit and he might catch on fire
To The New Kids I must say
I might cause Tremors with my rhyming way
Maybe you sould go to the Police Academy and join
Of course don't get Left Behind with coin

Aren't I a rhyming Lethal Weapon all the time
It's a Wonderful Life when you can rhyme
Don't Mimic me
As you might make The Mighty Ducks flee
Citizen Kane wouldn't like that
The Terminator might go and squash you flat

Do you have an Animal House
Could go all Silverado and shoot them up close
Or could recruit becoming The Magnificent Seven
Heck you could become The Librarian number eleven
Oh I should state Batteries Not Included with my blog
You might need some or risk getting lost in The Fog

Brian did you use your lingo and go all American Graffiti on some poor wall
Now you're caught and have to use Air America before you fall
I'm sure The Firm nearby will give you a deal
Just don't listen to Babe squeal
Sue for Brewster's Millions well you're at it
I can't tell you The Secret of My Success as then I'd have a fit

Doc Hollywood could patch one up nice
It be nice to be Forever Young with some spice
Did you see that Blue Streak
Maybe that means you have to Escape from New York so skip the leak
Avoid the Fortress though
Become a Freejack on the go

Maybe that will lead to the Revenge of the Nerds
Or at least at High Noon scare some birds
I bet reading this you aren't Gone in 60 Seconds from my place
Maybe I should serve up some Meatballs so you can stuff your face
Finding Money for Nothing would be sweet
Or robbing a Money Train might be neat

Who says White Men Can't Jump
Some just need Anger Management to get over the hump
Hoosiers might show you how it is done
Or Secondhand Lions could help you practice for fun
Did you ever Meet Bill
He has a Mannequin that gives him a thrill

Do you have the Sixth Sense
That allows you to see the Signs or are you dense
Did I turn you into an American Psycho yet
Bah you had A History of Violence I bet
Is that how you got your Stripes
Acting as if The Fifth Element gave you gripes

One day I will say Take This Job and Shove it
Or maybe I won't Say Anthing when I quit
But then only 12 Monkeys would remain
On Arlington Road they might pop a vein
Some can be Bad Company if you get my drift
I'd rather be home with Bedknobs and Broomsticks without things to lift

So have I delighted The Fox and the Hound
Or caused you a Breakdown sending you six feet in the ground
Bah you're Bulletproof so there is no issue
But a Chain Reaction might cause you to need a tissue
Then you'd bring on the Hard Rain
Joining The Crazies in another lane

The Day After Tomorrow is when you might get done reading this
Especially if you have a Fraternity Vaction you can't miss
Or if you go become a Gladiator in the past
Maybe a solar flare hit a Stargate and you went back fast
Then Godzilla could still roam
Or Gremlins might infest your home

Am I visited by Grumpy Old Men
With them I might not score a 10
I am way better than Howard the Duck
As I won't let you have an Indecent Proposal for a quick F***
Not even on Independence Day
Or if an Iron Eagle flew by my way

My Jaws are just a flapping
I'm sure you and Billy Madison are napping
Or thinking O'Brother, Where Art Thou?
As I can make even Old Yeller go wow
Don't bring no Desperado here
As you might get knocked Out Cold I fear

April Fools Day as come and gone
Unlike Weekend at Bernies I didn't drag it like some dead guy across your lawn
Oh don't go turn on the Radio ignoring the cat
For it's Risky Business doing that
As you might become a Scarface
Blame Shrek for doing that to your face

Don't you wish my place had the Silence of the Lambs
Instead of giving you a Silver Streak in all your going cold hams
A Simple Plan is what I had
But now you Sneakers might be mad
As even at warp Speed
I'm Taking Care of Business and you just have to read

At least if your stuck in The Terminal on your laptop
You will have something to do and not bother One Good Cop
But if you're traveling with Three Amigos by your side
When you go all Total Recall you'll know I lied
Don't choke on your Tootise roll
For White Fang still needs a stroll

Opportunity Knocks as things are getting dire
Have I lit your St. Elmo's Fire
Or have you become Airbourne
Riding an Airplane to come stab me with a thorn
But after 48 Hrs I might not be here
As Another You you might find as you come to peer

Wow this is really getting Big
Blankman might come and snap me like a twig
The Meteor Man will protect the cat
As it's time for a Boat Trip for Pat
But you Can't Buy Me Love
Not even if you Cast Away a dove

Things are Cheaper By The Dozen I'm told
City Slickers might not feel so bold
Conspiracy Theory is what I'm creating
While the Cops & Robbersons are mating
Fletch Lives don't you know
Even after Cool Hand Luke tried to have a go

Are you one that Dances with Wolves under the moon
Or are just Dazed and Confused by this rhyming loon
Equilibrium I do not give
So if it's the End of Days live and let live
Unless you're an Enemy of the State
Then Bruce Almighty might seal your fate

Liar Liar now now
Eye See You calling me a cow
Yes your Frequency I have tuned into
So when you become The Fugitive I will find you
Unless you're slain by the Gangs of New York
Before you get to pass your Good Morning Vietnam report

Don't fall in that Grease
Or go all Groundhog Day and kill yourself using geese
Wait it was H2O
Blame The Hangover for the screw up at my show
Oh I Love Trouble
Unles an Ice Age came on the double

Oh I just got called for Jury Duty
That's the Kiss of Death so they can call Rudy
Don't worry I'm not like Mad Max
As like being in The Matrix I am lax
Unless the Men in Black come
For all the Mischief you caused by being a bum

My Fellow Americans I have something to say
Whoops I'm not American so maybe the Newsies I will pay
Or call The Negotiator to come and stop
This Necessay Roughness or you doing the bunny hop
Office Space he might need
One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest he might think after a read

What Women Want I have no idea
But then Wildcats don't have that to fear
Zapped now it's your turn
Trading Places to feel the rhyming burn
As I drew First Blood
And remember when abusing an American Pie don't make a thud

Ok that was a tad long, but I'm sure there is nothing wrong, as for me that was kind of short, for I could go on way way way more with my movie retort. But to spare you all the hurt to your eyes and making sure no ones sits and cries, I won't show anyone up any more today, unless you leave a comment just saying hey. Then I will roast you like burnt grass, as I have to be a little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Monday, April 25, 2011

This 1 is Four U Fox, Don't Cut Me Two Pieces n Stuff Me in a Box!

"The big difference between sex for money and sex for free is that sex for money usually costs a lot less.” Woody Allen
LOL That was seen among the travels of Pat and it was quite funny to the cat. But now on with the show and away I go.
So in honor of Brian from old WaystationOne, coming here and spreading his slang fun, I'm going to take it one step more and really send you for the door. While Silver at least, as he's quite the beast, when it cums to what I'm about too due, in front of each and every 1 of u.

Oh know its happening to fast, I just hop it doesn't last. Due u get where I'm going yet? If not do not fret, as u might have the reading skills off a goat, but at least u tri so u have my vote. Oh this is harder to due than I thought, maybe a miss spelling book for dumbies eye should have bought.

Damn did eye just give away what eye was doing, now nun of u tri and go suing. As first the cat wud have too have cash, either way eye'd make a quick dash. So u couldn't catch me, hope ur lawyer was free. Look eye can still joke as eye miss spell, but if u cannot tell the difference shhh eye will not tell. Ok eye probably wud, as rightfully eye shud.

Isn't it amazing how u can still use different spellings and make cents while at the same time seeming more dense. Ok eye have to give credit wear credit is do, The Lair of Silver Fox is also the cause of what u sea in front of u. I guess lightening(haha) can strike twice, oh eye am not being nice. Four Brian brought the slang and Silver stated we were being a lazy gang, using rhyme and time when we shud bee using climb and mime. So the cat gut to thinking, with a little bit off winking, how sum people rush they're words, sounding like such turds. Plus how stuff like Twitter and that stupid book thing, has some limit or dunce bar they bring, making sum that much more lazy and all they due is go oopsy daisy.

Not that the cat is a big grammar nut, but eye can notice when sum are stuck in a rut. Betsy of coarse is always in rut as she is the equivalent of king tut, to her Five Men, wuld u rather eye compared u to mother hen? Or was that goose, bah she had too big of a kaboose. Uh Oh looks like shes creating a noose, eye better go any which way but loose. Get that 1 did u? Didn't think eye was old enough too use that one as eye due? While trust me scene quite alot, sum that were not quite so hot. Went off their, due u really care?

Mary also cam back to play the other day, guess she missed the rhyming fray. But than u all miss the cat, even when eye am spelling like tht. O K eye no it is not fare, that eye can get away with this at my rhyming lair, ooops stole a fox word, are not eye such a nerd? Wait do not answer that, as you might offend Pat. Yeah really who cares about him, but eye guess right now eye am the 1 looking dim. May be the Tales of Tashtoo is wear u shud go, wait on 2nd thought do not leave my show. Oh ok I no u'll cum back, after u sea Natasha does not lack.

Oh this hurts the head, I think I need to go to bed. The cat has no idea how people can keep this up, spelling like they are some two month old, butt sniffing, pup. Yay I shook that urge, to show all you why you should purge, the lazy way whether you are here, there or at my way. Yes I really don't care, as you can even swear. To which Brian can attest, as well as most of the rest.

So as I always have my mistakes here and there, none of them are bad enough to ruffle any hair. But if I ever saw a post like this, I would definitely give a hiss. Unless I was some inbred, Deliverance, banjo playing guy, thank God I'm not or I'd have to cry. Eye see u, u no eye due, hahaha had to do that, as I just like being an annoying cat. So I know with this post I gave you gas, get rid of it, feel better and know I'm still a little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Saturday, April 23, 2011

Brian I Blame YOU, Look What You Made Me Do!

So I was going to wait a few days to post, with my usual rhyming roast. But then Brian had to go and challenge the cat, as I was looking around at this and that. As I headed over to onestoppoetry for a look, at Brian's little nook. Ok it's not all his, oh did your ego just fizz..haha.

Then something rather clever was posted there, that raised the cats eyebrow hair. As I wanted to see if I could do the usual rhyme, using each word he posted telling others to use to chime. Yes I am rather slow, as it was supposed to be a Friday show. But oh well I can pretend, Friday just didn't end.

So what he did was stick seventy six words and two additions making seventy eight, that you could only use to make a poem that would elate. So I'm not sure if mine can do that, as it may only make sense to the cat. But what I did was use every single word he gave, over at his onestop cave. Bet none have done that, yes I'm still proving how I'm a clever cat. Oh and I ended up with seventy seven, meaning I was over by one not eleven. So I had to go back and see which one I used more than I was supposed too, that was not fun I tell you. So now as I go back to work on finding facts, here is my little try found over at the onestoppoetry tracks.

So boat carry if took
You try to whisper me a look

Here drank worm, said hello
Teardrops have pooled, go

Balloon ride cold near the moon
My green beans eat soon

Sound you make sour
These are mine, our

Sweet delicious magic some old friend write
They I treat tonight

Funny today the love pool does blue
Sunny yellow before was true

Rain dance in his sleep from her
Only a school dream this were

So there was my attempt at Brian's limited fun, as I used every word and that's how it's done. So now I'm done the post the wasn't supposed to occur, but no worries as it didn't ruffle to much of my fur. But Brian didn't give me crass, grass, or lass, so I wasn't able to add how I'll always be a little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Friday, April 22, 2011

Don't Call a Cop, Hippity Hop!

So today that cat has bad news, that really might give you the blues. As the cat was such a good boy this year, that the Easter Bunny came to give me an early cheer. But I thought Pat had left me some dinner and thinking I was a real winner, I chowed down quite fast and when I reached the last, I saw his collar and Pat let out a hollar, as I ate the Easter Bunny, I wish I was being funny. Sorry there will be no eggs this year, now don't sit there and peer. As Pat took some time from finding facts and helped the cat look for a new Easter Bunny acts.

First we went to try Bugs Bunny, but he wanted to much money. His royalty fees would cost ten thousand trees, yes that many trees would be wasted to make the cash, so we weren't long making a dash. Plus some weird hunter came and started some sort of game. Sticking a gun to his ear, but he never showed any fear, just chewed on a carrot and said "What's Up Doc", after that we figured they were all nuts and took a walk.

So we kept going and going, looking at each new showing, than came across a pink rabbit with some sun glasses, who seems to appeal to the masses. But every time we caught up beside him, he acted all dim. He just kept going and going down the street, banging on his drums to his own little beat. The cat could keep up with him and Pat could as well being slim, but he just wouldn't stop, not even for a nearby cop.

The next one we found was a real dodger, with the first name Roger. He was even more a nut than the other two, acting all crazy in his cartoon zoo. Doc Brown was there, except with no frizzy hair, Mario was there too, plus he was real who knew. He was too busy with his wife, thinking he had such the life. Plus she was drawn rather well, I really must tell. So he said no and than ran to and fro, like a fire had be lit, before we could get him to commit.

As we left his little realm, we came up to a big elm, I turned around rather fast, as the thumping was quite vast. There was a young rabbit that would do, thumping so much it would annoy most of you. He did say yes one thousand times, but you'd be better off with a few mimes. As he'd probably surpass every single house, trying to make friends with a young deer or maybe Mickey Mouse.

The next one we tried to catch, looked like he was playing fetch, yet didn't know how to return, as he kept running everywhere even across a fern. Saying I'm late, I'm late for some important date, I really wanted to slap that mate, upside the head with a big steel gate. Him I would eat and it would be a treat, but that watch was quite shiny and he was really tiny, so no meat there, just a whole bunch of white hair. After that pink one that wouldn't stop, we knew this one would also be a flop, so ignore him we did, as he'd just scare each kid.

The next was just kind of nuts, I thought Pat had sniffed too many butts and his weirdness was rubbing off on me, as a shadow is what we did see. Someone said is name was Harvey I think, as I was too busy trying not to blink. I jumped on the shadow to no avail, I even tried to naw on his fluffy white tail. But it didn't work, as that shadow did lurk. We thought he'd make a perfect fit, but the dumby acted like a twit, not answering back, as I went on a usual rhyme attack. So he followed us down the road a ways, then when I gave him a hateful gaze, the shadow was no more, plus he was beginning to bore.

We even stopped by Betsy's to see if Nugget would take up the mantle and after trying the window and door, which were locked tight, and we couldn't dismantle. We figured she was out on the farm with her usual charm, trying to fight of the germs and not step on any worms, as she took all their money, just happy it was sunny.

After that long journey we came home to Cassie smiling like some ugly garden gnome. Then she just slinked off onto her favorite chair and I really had to go to my litter box after eating that extra pear. After I was through and went to bury my, well, shit, Pat had a big fit. As it turns out that dirty sister of mine tricked me quite well, as my poo had no smell. For it was mostly fiber and cotton, as the taste of meat I must have forgotten. As Cassie told me I killed the Easter Bunny, making us go on that long trip and spend all our money, when what I really ate was a stuffed look a like, as it sunk in Cassie waltzed up and said psych. So I will say the Easter Bunny is still safe, so no longer will you sit wiggling your legs making them chafe and your eggs you will get, so no more taking a fit. Now I must go on the attack of Cass, chasing her all around with my little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Thursday, April 21, 2011

Finally The Big Reveal, As I Broke The Seal!

So I know you've come from the Tales of Tashtoo, expecting a rhyme or too. But sense I know you are all in such suspense, I'm about to give my ten cents. That's right what happen to that Drazin fellow and the rest of the nuts, will finally be learned as I spill my guts. So without further delay, on with what the cat and My Five Men did the other day. Oh damn I meant four, unless you count Pat's other personality which I know you want to hear more. Finally here I go, don't blink or you might miss the show.


The Cat and Pat Run Out of Gas

As Pat and I went to give Natasha a hand, we ran out of gas in no man's land. Then met up with Gung and Ho, why we let them come I still don't know. Pat also went nuts just a little, thinking he was King Arthur acting so funny I almost did a little piddle. Then we went in for some shelter in a barn and that's when that Drazin fellow started his big yarn. So the cat stepped on a seal, then things got real and noises were heard, not that of an owl or any other bird. What came next was a little scary, I wish it would have been some magic fairy.


The Cat and the Group Look Like Soup

The dirt in the field starting to move, really cramping everyone's groove, as the moon shined bright, helping to further light the starry night. Then heads started coming from the ground and lord and behold it was zombies we had found.

PAT: "Zombies? Really? Aren't they a bit over done?"

GUNG: "Hey at least it's better than teenage vampires in some love triangle."

HO: "Or that other show that just throws in nude scenes to get attention."

GUNG: "Wait a minute Ho I kind of like that one, after all those scenes make it all worth while."

HO: "Gung I bet you pause the good parts huh?"

DRAZIN: "Would you two nuts shut the hell up, Drazin will make you two zombies if you don't."

The zombies continued to rise, wanting to eat these guys, but all they could do was argue like they were fighting over who got to go to the loo. But then my eyes grew kind of wide, as the zombies starting taking great stride. These ones were kind of wierd, still they should be feared.

HO: "Look Gung, that zombie has a Disneyland cap, that one over there is dressed in a tutu, that one over there has no clothes at all, not cool."

GUNG: "That one has electricity coming from his ears, that one can breathe fire and that one, well that one just looks hungry."

After talking about the zombies a few seconds more, in they came on those four, well the cat hid in the back, hoping to avoid any attack.

PAT: "Come on Great God, smite them with a thunderbolt or something."

DRAZIN: "Shut up, the Great God Drazin doesn't show off Drazin's powers to mortals."

PAT: "Isn't that convenient."

As they backed up there was a loud girlie shriek, as if this night had already hit its peak.

HO: "Gung ones got me, get it off, get it off."

As we looked down Ho had backed up into a stick, poking his leg less than a woodtick. They all laughed as the cat jumped for higher ground, hoping I would never be found. As one of the zombies got up close, with his hat resembling Mickey Mouse. Drazin picked up the stick and shoved it through his eye, but he just kept coming as he didn't want to die. Although I guess he was already dead, so he figured he had to chop of his head. Then came a battle cry and I only wish it were a lie.

ARTHUR: "Let us smite these evil demons and send them back to the bowels of the underworld from which they came."

For Pat had gone nuts once more, off in la la land referencing Arthur lore. But he had found an axe in the crumbled barn's remains, so I figured let him be a nut and cause the zombies some pains. The Mickey Mouse one quickly lost its noggin and then Pat or Arthur, who ever, took off jogging. He sliced through a few and then Drazin stared at you know who. As he hadn't forgotten why he came, even if I knew he was pretty lame.

He began to climb the rubble, scratching his goatee stubble, bent on hurting the poor cat, but like a dirty little rat, a zombie came and grabbed his boot, giving a grunt and a hoot. He went to bite Drazin's leg, then got smothered by a bag. As Gung slapped a plastic bag over his face, hoping his eating intentions it would erase.

HO: "Ummm Gung?"

GUNG: "Yes?"

HO: "Do zombies even breathe?"

The zombie ate through the bag and without any lag, whipped around to snack on Gung, he thought his noose was hung. Then Drazin kicked the zombie in the neck, giving it a second peck, laughing as it fell off onto the ground and the body fell into the rubble mound. It seemed he thought this was fun, as he told me we weren't done. Then jumped down from the pile, shouted something most vile and sprang across the field, with only his fists to wield.

DRAZIN: "Look Drazin found a walking lighter. Maybe Drazin could use him to cook Drazin up a furball."

He laughed thinking it was quite funny, but I couldn't see where it was for no money. Then he let the zombie breathe fire at him and I have to admit now I thought he wasn't so dim. For he simply stepped aside and the fire went quite far and wide, burning at dozen or so zombies to ash, then he gave the zombie a bash. He knocked it to its knees and then he began to freeze. As a zombie from behind could breathe ice, that wasn't very nice.

He was about to get burned when Arthur chopped off the fire breathers head, oh how I still wished I were home in bed. Gung and Ho had found a rope and as the ice zombie began to grope, thinking Drazin was a tasty meal, making me kind of glad I hit the seal, they each took a side and with one big stride, wrapped the rope around his neck, giving a pull turning him into a wreck. As his head went snap, crackle pop and was no longer on top.

HO: "Kellogg's Rice Krispies."

GUNG: "Ho did you really just say that? I'll never be able to eat them again."

ARTHUR: "The scurge have gone back to wence they came. Deianeria would be so proud."

GUNG: "Ho wasn't that Hercules?"

HO: "Gung yeah I think so. Maybe after a few thousand years things get scrambled."

DRAZIN: "Now you damn fur ball where was Drazin? Oh yes Drazin was about to turn you into a hat."

HO: "Gung I think that be Davy Crockett."

DRAZIN: "Shut up you two morons or you'll make matching slippers for Drazin."

They all turned there sights back on me, Drazin wasn't about to let me flee. Then all of a sudden the body parts started to move, completely ruining everyone's groove. They began sticking together, I think I even saw a feather, and before we knew it a zombie bigger than a house, had formed looking all gross.

It shot fire at Pat who blocked it with is axe, but that slowly turned to wax. It froze Gung and Ho in their tracks, for it seemed to have the power of many different zombie acts. Drazin began to convulse on the ground, as electricity seemed to abound. Pat then got sent flying by a whirlwind of sort, sending him off into the trees after a few zombie snorts. Then it set its sights on me and obviously all I did was flee.

I ran for what seemed like forever, for I wasn't stopping, no way, never. Of course that would mean there was always land or at least some sand. But sadly there was none, as I ended up on a huge cliff thinking I was done. That damn zombie thing was right on my heels, it's like it had wheels. But I remembered a certain film reel I had seen with Pat, where there was a Yippee Kay Yay Mother F**ker and a guy went splat. So hoping the zombie had no brain, a little bit of a lead I did regain. So I made him go faster as well, which was really swell, for as I came up on the cliff, I gave the zombie thing one last whiff, letting him think I was caught, which I was not. Then at the last second I turned right and some cloud cover helped make it more dark at that moment during the night, so maybe he just didn't see, but unlike me, he didn't turn at all and that led to a great big fall.

As the zombie thing was crushed, spiked and flattened on the rocks, maybe he could have stopped sooner if he was wearing socks? He then got washed out to sea, all the parts that had been dismantled thanks to me. I breathed a sigh of relief and went back, as Pat was the only one standing and that's a fact. Well Gung and Ho were standing too, but they were quite frozen between me and you. The Great God himself was passed out like a dinky little elf and after Pat got Gung's arm free, we decided it was time to flee. For we had, had enough excitement for one night and it was beginning to become light. We then walked into the rising sun, knowing we had won.

So Natasha if you ever sell a house with a barn that's no more and some zombie guts laid out on the shore, you now know the tale and I'm sure you can repeat it without fail.

Now after all of that you might need a good rant, thankfully at The Lair of Silver Fox ideas he will plant. Then you could always go to WaystationOne, but I know you don't want to run. So have fun at my place before you go and that is all today from my show. Know even if there are zombie guts in the grass, I am still a little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Tuesday, April 19, 2011

Going All Profound, To Gain Back Ground!

So after Cassie's abrupt interruption, causing all kinds of corruption, at my rhyming shore, I'll try not to let her do it anymore. But before I go and bore or cause you to lose faith in my rhyming lore, I will give you all a chill, for Brian it might be a thrill. As last time it made him swear a whole bunch, just don't choke if you are reading and eating lunch. So proving I'm better than that stuck up Cassie, the primp and so called proper lassie, Ha I just compared her to a mutt, that has to be a kick to the gut. So as I was saying, time for a second to stop playing, impressing the masses who come to read, at my little rhyming feed.


Force exerting all around
Coarse, hurting, fall drowned

Crushing shoulders from weight carried
Brushing boulders, numb state buried

Life closing in gasping for air
Knife imposing skin, grasping your glare

Kick and squirm your way back up top
Thick hand firm allure, stay smack closeup, nonstop

Light can be seen almost there
Bright span key, screen foremost, prayer

From an abyss comes simply more
Numb, plan miss, gums chilly, tore

Sinking, Sinking, trying that much more
Drinking, Drinking, lying flat such gore

Kicking, squirming, for one more breath
Sticking, confirming, your done for, death

Sinking, Sinking, yet you still try
Shrinking, Shrinking, wet, skew, will high

For hopes of rising above remain alive
More slopes thereof surprising , shove, strain, thrive

So there we go, I just know, I won you all back with that, forget the stuck up Cassie cat. Actually I think it made more sense than my last, plus this one came out rather fast. Must be because one and all feels like there is no end or some light around the bend, at one point or another, as things start to smother. So that just came out, as with before I picked the title and out came each note. So Brian remember this isn't WaystationOne, so you don't have to bleep out your swearing fun..haha...not like you did that with your latest post, something must have stirred up the host.

Orson what was that? Are you name calling this cat? Oh wait that was Cassie from behind my back, I guess the female voice she must lack. So as you stay in The Lair of Silver Fox, why don't you go put some holes in his socks? Take it from me it can be quite fun, as a time or two it has been done, to poor old Pat, by this rhyming wild cat. Heck I take the toilet paper off the roll and for quite the stoll, stretching it all around the place, while making a funny face. Pat chases me away and then wraps me up in the stuff to my dismay, I just wanted to play, I'm not the one who has to pay.

Oh it sucks to have no internet, at least that is what I'd bet, as poor old Natasha hasn't been seen, good thing as Cassie was a little mean. No new posts at the Tales of Tashtoo either which must cause her distress, she just must be in a rhyming mess. Unable to come here and rhyme or even post elsewhere wasting some time. Then there is Raven who is kind of slow, but you know how things go. Life gets in the way, but she comes to play. Even if the comment is on an older one, at least she gets it done. Wait maybe she tries to be late, so you all can't see the rhyme she leaves at my gate. Oh she could be a closet rhymer, pretending to be a ghost like Slimer. Ok that was a bad comparison, I hope I don't going embarrassing.

Who have I forgot, some silly mutt? No, but I just can't remember her name, as she doesn't have my type of fame. Hmmm Bobby, Billy, Berla, Batsy, Betsy oh now I remember, how could I forget my usual rhyming member. Oh that's right when I saw the sheep last night at My Five Men, for which she made way more than ten, Pat looked over my shoulder chiming in my ear, no sorry Betsy it wasn't to give a cheer. As he had the hiccups for at least thirty minutes or so and I could hear him no matter where I tried to go. It kind of gave me a scare too, as I jumped when he came near me hiccuping two by two. Oh it must suck to get those, I'm a cat so never have to know how that goes.

There I went all profound, didn't treat anyone like a hound, showing Cassie up in fifty ways, like she could best me on her best days. Plus you all got a plug, no I didn't say hug, keep that to yourself or I'll ban you from my rhyming shelf. Also you know I had to give you one, as I needed as easy link to follow when I want to go read your fun. See alterior motives I have as well, but I don't think that will send me to hell. So now I must get off, as Pat is beginning to scoff. Yes he can be clever, but as good as me never. So don't give me no sass, as I'll always be a little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Make You Lose Your Screws, With Some Big News!

So today I have such a huge topic to discuss, I doubt it could fit on a bus. It will delight each and every one of you by the time the cat is through. So without delay, lets get to what I have to say…..grrr……..ummmm……awwwww…….stop……that……Paaaaaaat!

Cassie has control now, as I type you will all bow!

Look at this meek little brother of mine, acting like he’s all fine, when really he’s some imported half breed, if only Pat didn’t take those in, in need. All he’s good for is bait, for if someone opens the gate, I’ll send him out first to see if anything is there, if he survives and keeps all his hair, venture out for a bit I will go, if not at least I’ll know. But anything out there will spit him back, as fat he does lack. Plus he’s quite a mouthy cat, why do I talk in rhyme chat? Well to prove he’s no better than me, some big expensive cat and I was free. Yes Pat can be a moron like you all, so now I start to have a ball.

There that is all the plugs I’m going to give, as I don’t live and let live. I only plug those with class, it's just to bad none have as much as Cass. Yes that's me in case you are kind of slow, now lets see about those commenters below.

Betsy is a real class act, that has to be a fact, oh I delight myself so much, as toilet seats she will not touch, hovering about, trying to stay afloat, but then she loses her step and a little pep, as she falls right in with a splash and the germs all make a dash. But what do you expect from some one that uses a port a pottie, oh I'm so naughty, yet I'm still the one to be admired, next my publicist will be hired.

Country Bumpkin at her best, with such fire and zest, but with class she has nothing on me, so go now, flee. Look I didn't even mention her name, see I'm remaining some what tame. Then the poor Fox and Orson making quite the pair, although I like his black hair. But still it's all ruffled and matted, the Fox should be batted. But such class he just does not have like me, so watch and take a knee, looking up the skirts of married chicks, did you ever see any dicks? Oh I'm sorry such a dirty word you see, I don't know what came over me. Must be the company Orlin keeps, as he seems to find the classless by the heaps.

Brian at least won an award, yaaaaawwwwwn now I'm bored. Ocean girl? Really? You make my head twirl. Wanting be part of the ocean with all the dirty polluted water, may as well be cannon foughter. Alan is the nicest of the bunch, maybe with his trip he and Brian can do lunch, then Brian can show his award....yawwwwwn once again bored.

Hey don't touch me filthy cat, get away now..Paaaaat. I'm going to hit post before you can stop this and making all your fans hiss, driving them all away, so you can no longer play. Poor dear half breed, I'm just following your rhyming lead.

Hey that's not fair, I'll kill you I swear. Let go, stop running to and fro, get over here and let me knock you out your stupid cat, Paaaaat.

There I lost her for a second as I am just to fast, but I don't think my confusion will last, so I apoligize for Cassie the priss, if she made you all hiss. I'd delete it but I don't have the time, to do that and rhyme. Oh and my news it seems in all the fuss I forgot, Cassie just confused me talking about Betsy's butt, falling in the toilet as she tried to hover above, oh don't worry unlike her I mean it with a liitle love..hahaha So ignore the cat with supposed class and I will remain a little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

(heck I can't post this at all my flock, they might sit and gock, I'll just delete it here and now, owwww.)

(like hell you will, let's give your flock a thrill.)

Paaaat, where you at?

(Here he comes, he's going to use his thumbs and stop this post, as you are never supposed to be the host. Betsy should have never brought that up, I'd rather share with a pup.) dick.......(your post has been published have a nice day, now I'm going to cause you dismay)

Hey you two cut it out, don't make me shout!

(Half Breed)
(Priss with Greed)

(Wannabe Wild Cat)
(Annoying old Nat)

(Pat likes me more)
(Bah you're just an added chore)

Ok shut up you two, before I sell you to a zoo.

(Won't get much for her)
(Skin him and sell his fur)

Enough, Don't make me get rough!

(It's all your fault, you just should have stayed away from my rhyming vault)

(Is not, is not, is not)
(Is too, is too, is too you prissy snot)

is not, is too snot, is not, is too snot.......

Monday, April 18, 2011

Nasty You Will Say, As You Read What I Have Today!

So I promised to leave all of you alone, the next time I came out in my usual rhyming tone. So that I will and I'll do something new, grossing out each and every one of you. Betsy might take this the worst, due to her germ thirst, meaning she wipes them off quite fast, hoping they will never last. But I do it as well, I just know what I'm about to tell. So for your pleasure, yes go ahead and measure. This isn't the longest one I've done, but I will still have fun. As I should really be in bed, so I don't go to work tomorrow like a sleepy head. Oh wait Pat has to do that, I can sit home and nap, yep a lucky cat. As I was saying, before I went off playing, here are some germs, that would make you rather play with worms, they might also make you make tracks and that is the facts.

In an average day, as you go about and play, your hand will come indirectly in contact with 15 dicks, yes that's 15 for all you hicks. Through touching door handles, grocery carts and bottles you use to quench your thirst, remote controls in hotels are supposedly the worst. But there are probably many more, heck I now don't even want to leave my floor.

An average person's yearly fast food intake, whether in the car or by a lake, will contain 12 pubic hairs, you're nuts if you say who cares.

Annually you will shake hands with 6 women who've recently, you know, played down there, and didn't wash their hands after twirling some hair, sorry all I think of to rhyme, really must be bed

Annually you will shake hands with 11 men who've recently, you know, played down there, probably in some dark corner of a lair. Was that a poke? Nope just a

Daily you breath in one liter of other peoples anal gases and that obviously comes from their asses.

In an average lifetime, there will be a crime, as 22 nosey workman will have gone through your dirty laundry pile, yeah that is kind of vile.

At an average wedding reception, yes there will probably be a lot of deception, but you also stand a 1/100 chance of getting a cold sore from one of the guests, so don't go and let your lip rests, on any glasses that aren't your own, heck don't even put your lips to a phone and no kissy kissy crap, tell them to go run a lap.

Only 1 in 6 people, on average, wash their hands after going to the loo, imagine if they touched their

After using the loo, which we all do, just one of your hands, this might make you run to different lands, can have 200 million bacteria per square inch, that's why you be like Finch. Shit Break for all of those who didn't get that, or like Pat and hold it until you get home, least you know all who roam.

Cell Phone is the germiest accessory most people carry, now that has to make you kind of hairy.

There I am done scarying you all for today, as I have to get in bed and stay. With all the dust mites, that probably give me bites, as they do all of you, but don't stew, as they've been there forever and bothered you almost never, as they do what they do, to me and you. So now you know to annually avoid touching a strange lass, as I continue to be a little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Saturday, April 16, 2011

Just for Brian I'll go Big, But I Won't Wear a Wig!

Refrigerator opening
Last laugh always
Incredibly quick witted
Nimble, naughty, rhyming cat.

Awww after she went and forgot my name, Betsy sucked up saying this which wasn't lame, about your host Orlin the cat, forget about stupid Pat. Yes I know it didn't rhyme, but she used such a big word in her cat suck up chime, that I suppose it could have been tough and maybe a little bit rough. But there is only one way to find out, so big words are what this post is about. I know it might be to Brian's delight, after his comment last night, it seems small things give him a complex, so now I will do a bit of a flex, rhyming the big words instead of fit, socks and turds. Letting Brian stand tall, even if some things seem small..hahahaha...oh you stepped right into that one, giving me lots of fun. I also have no idea where this will go, but on with the show. Be sure and blame Betsy from My Five Men, if you can't prounce each word that has more letters than ten. So know I will never fade and will always be here to gasconade.

So a certain member of the rhyming flock, likes to bathe her feet in the sink well her neighbor walks by to gock. Let's just hope her callipygian isn't seen or her husband might get mean and a bit cantankerous, resulting in something that is rancorous.

Then there are the Tales of Tashtoo which are anything but opuscule, unless you are a stubborn mule. Plus her tales sure aren't penultimate as Natasha always strives for the ultimate. Plus she is so coruscant and she'll never levant.

Now there is Orson and the Fox hiding out in his Silver Fox Lair, let's see how I fair. Well he has a beard like Saint Nicholas and maybe is a bit saxicolous. For me using big words is like speaking alien, as Silver would be the first one I'd expect to be sesquipedalian, which would be a quality that is idiosyncratic, as he doesn't like his words to be static. I also love how Orson is quite pertinacious and at the same time contumacious.

Oh and I can't forget Brian and WaystationOne, letting him miss out on all the big word fun. As his poetry is so harmonious and with comments he is never parsimonious, plus he is never too sanctimonious, that comment may cause him to be a bit But that is probably erroneous, as he knows my rhyming shore is unceremonious. I hope my little plug wasn't to circumlocution, I wouldn't want to be sited for word pollution.

Did you know Alan was a thief? Well I'm going to cause him some grief, as I guess he has the usufruct to his News From Nowhere duct. So he is quite unencumbered, but sorry by me your rhymes are outnumbered. But then no one can catch me so that doesn't make them in any way depreciated, for they are always appreciated.

Well now A Sun Kissed Life came for a visit too, as I was there to see you. But the first thing I saw was a mutt, but the mutt is cute so the cat won't be a nut. Just don't go sniffing to many callipygian not even if you are Egyptian. You can sniff what's her names though, as she forgot mine so her name I just don't

Even Orlando came to visit calling me fascinating, I guess it pays not to be procrastinating. He just makes my shore, seem that much cynosure and O' about that, his blog title rhymes with cat.

So you can't say I left you neglected, that I know you never suspected, but you might feel a bit abused and a tad used, after reading all these long words, when you're used to be dropping small little turds. I'll never forget to gasconade, as now that word has been laid, strategically in my brain, so I can use that at my rhyming lane. Anyway yes you are right I'm a sockdolager, that's even better than a proctologer. I'm definetly not magnanimous as I have nothing against running away and being pusillanimous. So there we go Betsy that's how it done, aren't I always such fun, showing everyone up at my shore and at least I try not to bore. I just got on a roll, as the big words took their toll and once again used all of you, next time I'll do something Well this time you couldn't even tell if I was crass, but I bet some are saying what a little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Friday, April 15, 2011

That Black Cat, Doesn't Fall Flat!

So as I was going from place to place, showing my rhyming face, laughing at Betsy's weeds growing so well, oh I just had to tell. That was quite a funny sight, guess they don't need light..hahahaha. Poking fun over at My Five Men, I have done a time or ten, so she's used to it be now and shouldn't have a cow. How does one have a cow anyway? For I must say, the only thing that comes to my mind, really just wants me to hit rewind and erase it from my head, the drop it in the sea covered with lead. But that can't happen so I guess it must be stored, at least with those thoughts I'll never be bored..haha. Just maybe turn into a nut, that needs a good kick in the butt.

So the title reflects my visit to the cat called Orson over at a certain lair, who seems to have quite the flare. How can you not like a cat that tells Silver to shut up, so to Orson I tip my tuna cup. Although Fox I think you might have a touch of the multiple personality syndrome that's going around, as here it certainly can be found. A tip for those hairs in the key board you hate, suck them off with a vaccum cleaner and they'll be off your plate, so to speak, Orson might not be for the meak. As he could tell you off quite nice, might even do it twice. The cat loves it I must say, really made my day. Oh and poor Orson pork, ham, steak and all that good stuff, Pat shares without so much as a huff, so if you ever get across the border, just send up your order.

So now I go on to the Tales of Tashtoo, which I'm sure have been read by most of you. Obviously Brian who got there first, messing up my usual burst. But I was slow the last few days, so I'll just give you a slightly hateful gaze. Anyway so Natasha has been showing off great pictures as of late, using them as extra bait, as her words suck you in even more over at her shore. As they were taken by her dear old daddy, so there is a shout out to them from this laddy, errm umm cat, damn it Pat, stopping trying to type, I know you have a gripe, with me getting so much attention, but try it again and I'll put you in detention. Ok that was a tad weird, I acted like the guy with the Silver beard. Plus Natasha has added My Nova Scotia to her blog, clearing away all the fog, so if you ever want to track her down or maybe this rhyming clown, that could help, just don't make me yelp. Her it's ok, I just want to be able to rhyme and play. Yes the cat only looks after number one, pfffft don't go and shun, or have a fit over the words I admit. Look three plugs in one, aren't I just so much fun?

Now back to Brian who's probably already crying, that he hasn't got much said about him yet, well don't fret. As today you weren't just beat by one cat but two, see Orson look what you made me do. Make poor old WaystationOne come completely undone, as Brian is off prancing around in a pool, isn't that so cool? Awww to just go and splash about, you got this cat's vote. As yes I go and jump in the tub when Pat is done in the shower, for I do not cower, from water at all, as I am so tall. I even bathe in the kitchen sink, after I give Pat a meow and a wink, then he turns on the tap and I shut my yap, sticking my head under getting all wet, yes a wet cat might cause one to fret. But Brian sorry I wouldn't be allowed to jump around the pool with you, as yes it could fit more than two, but since it is rubber and not as durable as Flubber, with my claws on my paws, it would go pop and the fun would just stop. So I'll refrain from jumping in, as ruining all your fun would be a sin.

Speaking of small things like that, ever think how little one needs to amuse themselves when they are a young cat. I mean bubbles or rocks will do or mud or some pasty goo. Now it's just all yuck, I'd never want to play in the muck, but then you don't have a single care, plus will run around bare. Ok that last one the cat does now, but so do all cats so that doesn't wow, Pat we won't speak of about that, I'll save that for another chat. Look what you made me do Brian, now the random stuff is just a flying. Maybe I should give someone a Fawk You, bah that I'll let Raven do.

So there is my News from Nowhere oh crap that is already taken so I wouldn't dare, steal poor Alan's title, as then I may no longer be his rhyming idol. hahahaha oh my big head showed itself there, but it's only fair, as I rhyme like no other, Cassie and Pat just sit thinking o'brother, but I'll beat them up later, maybe make Pat wrestle a gator, wait there are none of them up here, guess he has nothing to fear. Oh and Alan the answers were placed in the comments below the last post, as I am such a nice host. Plus the Fox and I rhymed puzzle a few times, no lie. See isn't my place just so helpful to one and all, as I answer you call, in typical rhyming fashion, with a good tongue lashing. So look I didn't even have to have anything to say, at all today. Just went and visited all of you and then a post came out of me too. Guess I should thank each one, but then that be no fun. So well Betsy's weeds grow high above the grass, I will always be a little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Tuesday, April 12, 2011

Went All To Hell, Shhhh Don't Tell!

Well you know some bloggers cheat, yet it's still neat and have posts in advance, to cover their stance. Forcing themselves to write a whole bunch, sometimes skipping lunch, one day of the week, until they reach their peak. Sorry the cat can't do that and I blame it on Pat. As his ocd tendencies won't let him just have something sit and wait, he has to get it done and off his plate.

So now you once again know more than you needed to know about Pat, thanks to the clever cat. Anyway what was the point in my little shout, well it wasn't to gloat. As I had a lot of ideas flowing through me head and want to get rid of them before bed. Plus I had three days before the end of April I had to use or else those days I would lose. So for the rest of the week I'm on vacation from work, so now I can do the lets facts and lurk. Plus catch up on some movies and stuff, but not before I huff and I puff. As today I really did go to hell and as I warning I will tell, I might cause you to waste an hour or two, but I know that won't bother some of you. So with out further adieu, here is all the stuff I needed to get out of my head from me to you.

So whoops I did it again, this time for My Five Men. Oh you thought I forgot all about this did you? Well that's one thing I don't normally do. As I have a mind like a trap and can flap my yap, but always remember most things, even if sometimes it takes a few minutes before the bell rings, causing me to recall, what it was I did last fall. Anyway without further delay, here is the latest one I did today.

Oh Fox was that a tear or was it a cheer? Yes you can show it to one and all, even take it to the mall. But don't just sit in your Silver Fox Lair and play it over and over with some glare. That isn't healthy for some one your age, might cause fits of rage..hahaha.

So I'm always going from place to place, showing my rhyming face and two I keep coming across, that leave me for a loss. As they both see the same picture yet their words aren't the same, WaystationOne of course is one I can name. As Brian goes way out there and relates it in a way one wouldn't think, sometimes with a sly little wink, to certain activities that leave you bare and if someone out of the blue saw they might stare. But I won't go there and ruffle any hair, head or butt or hair on the gut, I'll leave it all alone, and just throw him a bone.

The other is of course the Tales of Tashtoo, where once again Natasha surprises me and you. With sequels to tales and peoms by the pails, as well as a video or two, as she has a whole slew. Yet she uses the same picture as Brian and comes out a tryin, making it an original work so great, even when I show up late. So the moral of rant number two is I guess, I'm going to throw my hat into this mess. So here I go with show number two, for each and every one of you.

Well hmph I finally had some time and checked out old onestoppeotry today, all ready to play and they switched to story mode I see, well the cat strayed away like a busy bee, as others and the cat don't play together well, as sometimes the cat doesn't watch each word he must spell, plus Twitter and I need a break, as after all the crap I do with that I just want to drown it in a big ass lake, which is what it would take, but a tale I can make.

First I have to say, that if my cats get old and slow one day, I'll always have a way to scare the rats, as one of the pictures of the one stop hats, is of poor old Brian's mug, hahaha sorry had to give that a tug. So Brian you keep smelling that manure as now the cat takes the floor, for act number two, really is quite the zoo, but unlike your little tale, that starts in a barn and hay bail, the cat ends up there, again some don't rhyme and are mean, strange and down right nuts so BEWARE!

The Cat and Pat Run Out of Gas

Natasha had been avoiding the cat, due to moving and all of that, so one evening after dinner, Pat suggested a real winner. As he has moved tons of times, so without any rhymes, he suggested we go help her move fast, so her avoidance wouldn't last.

After a slight bitch and moan, and trying to pretend I was on the phone, we hopped in the car, I was just glad we didn't have to travel far. As I dreaded our last trip, when we ran into that Drazin dip, but the border we wouldn't go near, yet I still had a slight fear, like this shouldn't be done, as it wasn't going to be much fun.

A few honks and middle fingers later on our drive, things started to take a dive, as once the city was in our rear view mirror left eating our dust, everything began to go bust. For silly old Pat had forgot to fill the tank and we were stuck on some back water road smelling something awful rank. I think it was cow manure, but I couldn't be sure, as it was coming from every direction, I thought at least if cows like their own smell they'll surely get an erection. Yes I know it was a dirty thought, but I really didn't want to go for a trot.

Two long hours had passed and not a single soul had amassed, the sun was also beginning to set and I started to fret. As coyotes, bobcats and bears oh my, could come out and make me die. I pleaded a bit with Pat and after a little chat, he locked the car door and off we went once more. Although I wished we never did and no I do not kid. For things literally go to hell in this tale I'm about to tell.

PAT: "Look cat someone dropped some money on the side of the road."

Greed ridden Pat stated as he saw something shiny, that was quite tiny. He jumped down into the ditch, without a hitch and grabbed the object, bringing it back up to me so we could reflect. But as he grasped it tight, try as he might, his hand would not come undone, seconds later when it did he fell to the ground twitching like he was shot by a gun.

CAT: "Pat you dead? Why couldn't you let me stay in bed?"

I checked his pulse to see if he was alive and it could be felt beating like a sharp knive. Then suddenly he awoke right fast, as I was hoping it didn't last. Pat shook his head up and down, squashing his face into a frown, trying to figure out what just occurred, he muttered a bit to see if his speech was slurred, but everything seemed well, that is until. He got up and we started down the road side and lets just say my eyes got wide.

ARTHUR: "Where are we my friendly feline? Has that dastardly three headed dragon scurried off into the bush?"

My jaw dropped, as I never thought Pat's stupid antics could be topped, but this, this was right out of some side show, like down freak row.

ARTHUR: "Well my four legged friend, what is the battle we have set course for this time? Sirens? Gods? Bedding a wench?"

CAT: "Ok Pat it's time you shut up about that, leave la la land, boy this is the last time I try to give Natasha a hand."

Pat looked around like he thought I was talking to a third party, then scolded me like I was being tarty.

ARTHUR: "Who is this Pat character you speak of? Is he the foe we seek? Never fear as the great King Arthur will slay the dastardly demon."

CAT: "King Arthur right, have you been drinking stuff that wasn't alcohol light?"

Pat stopped in his tracks, once again shaking his head like he was host to two acts.

PAT: "Wait what just happened?"

CAT: "Finally you can stop being all loony and cartoony, so now can we get out of here, as night has fallen and being eaten I fear. Wait must I bow before the king and maybe kiss your ring?"

Pat looked at me like I was the crazy one and off we walked which I swear was a ton, seeing trees after trees and oh my poor knees. Then finally we happened upon two odd ducks, yes they were quite the schmucks. As one was as large as a house, well the other looked the exact same but was as small as a mouse. They stood on the side of the road with their thumbs in the air, not having a single care. As obviously they hadn't seen a car for hours, as we've had better luck watching the flowers, grow to a huge height, anyway at first I thought they might bite. We gave them a nod and went to pass, but before we knew it they were on our ass.

GUNG: "What to you think Ho? Should we allow these two fellows the pleasure of our company?"

HO: "Sure Gung, as they look like they could use some swell fellows like us."

PAT: "No offense guys, but we've had our fill of weird for one night, so go back to twiddling your thumbs on the side of the road."

CAT: "Yeah you heard him beat it before I have a fit."

The pair looked at each other, with their eyebrows raised like they were thinking oh brother.

GUNG: "You calling us weird when you travel with a talking, rhyming cat? Well Ho what about that?"

HO: "Gung I think they just can't stand our awesome might. As the power of Gung Ho as a team is just to much for them."

PAT: "Hear that Cat? We are being followed by Gung and Ho and together they are Gung Ho, wow I must say that is definitely creative."

CAT: "Well we don't want to chat, so scat, before I squash you flat or maybe I'll leave that to Pat."

GUNG: "That rhyming stuff is so amazing Ho, I have to give it a try. We a Gung Ho and we will show, that Gung and Hung and Ho is kind of...slow?"

HO: "No way Gung, Ho is your bro, better than your toe, in a row, needs to go, like a good bow, hell I don't know."

GUNG: "Wow it's harder than it looks, maybe we should keep trying, as that makes perfect right Ho?"

These two morons went on about this for what seemed like forever and no they were no where near clever. But they kept following us like flies on shit, at least we didn't get bit. But I figured I'd let them follow some, as I saw Deliverance and didn't really want anything stuck up my bum. Then it was like they were getting in Pat's head and he began to shake once more, as I realized what was it store. It had to be that stupid shiny thing found down in the ditch, making him one crazy son of a bitch.

ARTHUR: "Foul creatures brought forth by satin himself, be gone with the pair of you."

Gung and Ho just sat and watched giggling, some things on the rather large Gung were actually jiggling. That was a sight no one wants to see, not even me. There are just some things you can't use to make fun, as you want them out of your brain and undone. But worst of all, Pat had a stick and was having a ball, acting as if it was a sword, poking at Gung Ho until they go bored and slapped it away, thank God Arthur didin't stay.

PAT: "Ummm what was that all about?"

GUNG: "Look Ho he has multplie personalities, isn't that awesome?"

HO: "Hey maybe my alternate personality is Merlin and we could be a team you think?"

I slowly think Pat was becoming aware of what was going on, but figured he'd deal with that come dawn, right now we had to get off the street, as all of us were beat. Ho pointed out a light from across a field, as Pat went nuts once more and was using a piece of old cardboard, found on the road, as a shield. So with the two weirdos in toe and nut job Pat running to and fro, off we went for the barn, as I stated when I began this yarn. But just when I thought things couldn't get worse, I opened the door and out came a curse.

DRAZIN: "Finally fleabag, you have come back into the sight of the Great God Duke Drazin and Drazin will not let you escape this time, your ass is Drazin's. As Drazin is going to skin you and use you as a hat."

Once more I found myself staring at this clown, except this time he looked just a little bit down, basically he looked like a bum, who had no more rum. Then he grabbed me by the scruff of the neck, as I gave his nose a good deck. He dropped me and then gave me a look, like straight out of some deranged book. His eyes began to glow red, at least they gave us some light so it wasn't all bad.

DRAZIN: "You made Drazin lose Drazin's job, so now Drazin travelled all this way for revenge. Thanks for saving Drazin the rest of the trouble of tracking you down though."

He laughed like some over the top super villian, well Gung Ho sat by the door chillin and Pat finally came in the barn door, jaw almost dropping to the floor. Then he once again began to shake and started to partake.

ARTHUR: "Hell spawn, if only I had the great Excaliber by my side, then I'd send you back to the underworld and I'd steal from the rich and give back to the poor."

GUNG: "Ho wasn't that Robin Hood?"

HO: "Yeah Gung I think it was, do you think he has more personalities in there?"

DRAZIN: "Awww did Drazin scare you so bad the last time you met Drazin that you went into a loonie bin type state poor Pat?"

ARTHUR: "Who is this Pat of which you speak? For I, King Arthur, will smite thee with by bare hands."

CAT: "Pat errrm ummmm Arthur you aren't really helping your cause, standing around like your waiting for an applause. Also Drazin you big over sized mook, you're as much of a God as I am a nuke. Gung and Ho you two are nuts and smell like a couple of butts."

I had enough and let them have it, throwing a typical fit, but that was a bad idea, for they surrounded me I fear. They backed me into a corner horse stall, then I stepped on something and the whole barn began to shake and fall. I swept the hay away from me feet and there was this symbol that looked kind of neat. It sunk into the ground, like a switch I had found and everyone ran out of the barn fast, I was the last. As I just escaped before it all fell flat, squashing this cat.

Yet when the dust cleared, it was as I feared, I was still standing infront of the nut Pat, Gung who was quite fat, Ho who just didn't know and Drazin the mouthy man, who really needed a tan. A full moon shined down upon us on that faithful night, when noises could be heard giving me quite the fright. As the sight to be seen, could turn even the most brave cat green.


TO BE CONTINUED...........

There was my story moment for the week, so if it's any more profound you seek. Go play in Lanie's soapbox and holds on to your socks, I mean that for sure this time, as she did quite the chime, about clutter, made me mutter, about how stupid some people can be, when they see the word almost free. I mean having enough toilet paper to last forty years, if anyone gives that cheers, I'll smack you upside the head, but don't worry I'll make sure you were well fed.

So now on to rant number three, actually it isn't a rant just something from me. As I thought I'd give you all some work, as you come here to lurk. Plus maybe keep you amused, for I wouldn't want you to feel to abused. Anyway here is my little concoction out of the blue, from me to all of you. Do you have the resolve, to sit and solve?


WARNING - thanks to Betsy know dumb blogger messed it up and number 6 is cut short, hint it starts with and doesn't have duper.

ACROSS 3. Follow the Tracks, And That's The Lets Face it (5)____________
4. Owner of an Act that is Spooky, While I'm Kooky (5)____________
6. Atrotcious and Precosious (34)_______________
10. Owner Won an Award, I Know Bored (13)___________
12. This Girl, Came To Rhyme for a Whirl (5)__________
14. The Real Name, Of The Cat Seeking Fame (5)___________
16. Lucky Feet, House Trained Which is Neat (6)________________
17. Place at the Facts, For Many Acts (9)__________
19. Oldest for Last, He Might Put Your Knees in a Cast (9)____________
20. Comes in a Bucket, Could Also Chuck It (7)__________
DOWN 1. There are Five in Her Hive (5) __________
2. I Swear and Don't Care (5)___________
5. Can Spin a Tale, The Size of a Whale (7)_____________
7. Take a Walk, With Hitchcock (6)______________
8. In a Baby Sleeper, So Not to Make Her Cut Deeper (6)_____________
9. Used to Rhyme with Fox, At My Box (5)__________________
11. Counting Others Money, Not Funny (10)_______________
13. Silver Hairs, Favorite MeMe at His Lair (7)_______________
15. Rather Crude Fellow, He Can Bellow (6)_____________
18. It's Time, Not Crime (5)______________

Answers below, away you go!

Ok this one I made rather easy and maybe a tad cheesy, but if you get stuck and down on your luck, just ask for the answer below and I might let you know. Or maybe I'll just keep you in suspense, as your nerves become immense and you just can't get that one word, cursing and flipping me the bird. So there was the third act of my spiel, don't I just keep things real? Also I had to put a few letters in the puzzle, as blogger once again was being stupid and needed to be put in a muzzle.

Anyway after all the work I did on this post, I deserve to sit back and roast, each and every one of you, that comes by my rhyming zoo. So when you are finally through reading my huge mass, you'll still consider me a little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.