Tuesday, May 3, 2011

Such a Stupid Rule, Yes I'm Cool!

So today as the cat was going from here to there, looking every where. Ok I lie, it was really last night thanks to that Pat guy. But now that he is finally done doing all of that, it is time for this little diddy by the cat.

As I read that dumb rule, no not that dogs drool. As we all know that, so there is no need for that chat. It was that dumb saying i before e except after c, that is what I had to go and see. It is just dumb because people think it always is the case and it's used as basically a trace. Oh yeah the saying says it so it has to be true, lets see how true it is here and now in front of all of you.

Oh I just fooled you with my feint, don't let me hear a complaint. Betsy from My Five Men used to be feisty a day ago, but her tongue went numb and speech started to slow..LOL. I will never forfeit because I always win, so the cat you will never pin. Think it's time to seize the day, if you do don't go and stray.

I can hear that dumb neighbor through the wall, thank God there has never been a mating call or I might pop a vein, then need to go hop a train. But don't worry I wouldn't commit a heinous act and that's a fact.

Society can be a fickle bunch, hiding behind a veil until lunch. No one will ever strap reins on me, as I am to fast and will flee. Or maybe I'll hit them with a Seismic Toss, that's a Pokemon reference not Lacrosse. I could go and find a sheik, maybe he'd even be Greek. The cat also runs a bunch so will never have to watch his weight, as long as I don't eat past eight.

A Rottweiler would scare me quite a bit, if Pat got that I would have a big, big fit, either that or make him scat, proving I am all of that. For this is my sovereign nation and I'd rather take a Dalmation. Wow talked about two mutts there neither will soon be in my hair.

Brian you still have to get the tools for our heist as I know my plan had you enticed. Or are you still smitten by this nice little picture but it reaches such a great height from me you'll hear no stricture. The cat eats a lot of protein don't you know, but no caffeine as I wouldn't know which way to go. I'd be so wired I'd never come down, a whole new species one might be able to crown. The cat that can float, but no codeine can be put down my throat. That's a rule and there are two more, think of me as a Gremlin not a boar.

One other one has to do with my keister in fact, but that one you will never extract. As I want to be called a companion like in the rant Silver Fox gave, over at his cave, ummm lair, with his silver hair. But Pat won't go for that, as he thinks it's pathetic and flat. Maybe if I gave him some phenolphthalein he'd get the runs, then a petition I could starts and get signatures by the tons.

But us pets have no voice, don't you think we should have a choice? No? Get away from my show. Now you sound like Pat and he can't be right about that. But wait then I'd have to give up humping a leg and may not be able to remain stag. Yeah screw that dumb rule too, as I like the old one not the new. So did you count how many words I used that broke that dumb rule? Or did you get hung up on dog drool? Yeah I know as soon as Betsy seen it she'd have to clean, numb tongue and all aren't I mean?..hahahaha

So today chase the kiddies from the room, as I put away my tame broom and once again state my normal phrase, as you all just sit and gaze or would that be graze? Whoops I may have offended a cow with that phrase, what next a tree? Yeah I better shut up before a snow flake sues me, so as I'm sure Brian never forgets his shoes any more, as he goes out the door, avoiding the poop in the poor lonely, forgotten grass, I will forever remain a little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.


  1. I before E except after C.
    It is a dumb rule and the exceptions are many!

    Like the words seize, beige, freight and eight!
    Codeine, deity, either and neither!
    Forfeit, foreign, deity and feisty!
    Science, seismic, neighbor and heifer!
    Veil, society, sovereign and vein!

    Oh yes, it's strange!
    You could even say it's weird. Get it?...weird.
    There's another one, dear!

  2. And let's not forget the old joke that if "I" always came before "E" (except after "C"), Albert Einstein couldn't have spelled his own name correctly!

  3. haha rules are meant to be broke, bloke, and the dog craps my yard again, he will learn to repent of his sin, you know. seems betsy found her tongue, used mine a bit different when i was young, can still touch the tip of my nose with mine, which is a mighty fine trick indeed, agreed?

  4. lol at Brian. My tongue is still numb so if I tried that little trick
    I wouldn't know if my nose got hit! haha.

    But my fingers type fine
    so I can still rhyme.

  5. Damn you picked most of the ones out I used
    Guess I kept you at least a little amused
    Yes I got it with out the point
    But for the slow pokes in the crowd they might need it so their nose doesn't get out of joint

    Wow you rhymed and told a joke
    Aren't you a clever bloke
    Oh bugger this I used language from afar
    Must be that new smell from my car

    hahahahaha Techincally it's not the dogs fault
    The owner should keep him in his own little vault
    Meaning lawn
    And then in your grass crap wouldn't spawn
    Mine isn't that long to touch
    Not even when I try a bit much
    Used tongue for other things
    All kinds of thoughts that brings
    Yes a mighty fine trick
    To give your nose a lick
    Just make sure a booger isn't there
    Or you don't latch on to any nose hair

    You could use a mirror to see
    If you could touch your nose actually
    Maybe you should cut the numb piece away
    Then hope it grows back one day
    Wait that's a bad idea
    That would cause to much pain I fear
    Than again if it is numb
    Just kill the germs with a little rum
    And away you go
    Yeah bad idea still I know

  6. Cut a piece away?
    OOoh...I'd rather take another spray!
    You've been playing too many violent games
    thinking I'd knife my own tongue and take aim.
    'Cause a bandaid wouldn't stick
    and it would be hard to lick.
    Couldn't drink my coffee
    then my rhyming would get sloppy!
    No, I'll just let it heal on it's own
    and write you this little poem.

  7. haha it was just an idea
    One that admittedly would strike fear
    But it would make the numbness go away
    Yeah with no coffee you might not be able to play
    So just heat that up good and hot
    Then suck back a lot
    Maybe you'll be so wired the numbness will come undone
    Actually watching that probably be quite fun
    Lets hope it will heal
    Or that part of your tongue will never again feel

  8. I hope you are not trying to blame me,
    This has been sent by Alan's dog - Amy.

  9. Is the Numb Tongue Commercial Adventures in The Factinary?

  10. No I'd never blame a nice pup
    Although Alan might get mad if you knock over his tea cup

    Numb Tongue never gave me an image to use
    So nope the Factinary she can not abuse

  11. If you're asking for an image of my tongue
    a long wait you have begun.

  12. hahaha maybe with some cartoon eyes
    And a smile that makes it look wise
    Then numb tongue can go all over the map
    Always numb so no need for a nap

  13. lol...it could become more famous
    than the cat in the hat!
    Now, what would you think of that?
    Well, since it was your idea
    I'd be sure to share profits with ya.

  14. Hey Numb tongue can keep the fame
    I'll just take the money and buy a new game
    Numb Tongue can make us both rich
    Then the job I could ditch
    But it will never be as great as this cat
    Just going to have to face that