Thursday, June 9, 2011

In a Rush, So Mush!

Why are humans always naming things so dumb, boy I wish I had an opposable thumb. For whoever came up with the name rush hour, must have been lacking in brain power. Yeah the same could be said for Rush Hour 3 and probably 2 as well, but I don't want to spoil them as they may not sell. Oops went into movie land there, with that sequel pair. Confused yet? Oh don't fret, as what I'm saying you might get, but for some of you it probably isn't a sure bet. Oops now I may need to go on defense after pushing you off the fence. Bah think I really care, unless you're a bear.

Lets go with awkward first, to quench the "cool" peoples thirst. As they sit going vroom vroom with their engine behind tons of cars, yet it still reads zero on their speed bars. Yeah like pushing the pedal down is going to make the light change or magically have all the traffic just rearrange.

Next up comes big and scary, sometimes things may get hairy. As just because they are some big truck, they act like a, ummm, you know duck. Substitute that with an F, although saying it to someone's face may make you need a ref. These big nut jobs think they own the place, stopping right in front of your face and then backing up where they please, as their tail pipe gives a cough and a wheeze.

Now for the reason so many are hard of hearing, as there is no need for peering. For from a mile away you can hear the crap they play. Do you really want to share that much, maybe you like using no hearing as a crutch? Oh and then lets honk the horn while we're at it, pretending to have a fit. Oh and guess what? You're still sitting in the same place on your butt, as the lights can't hear you nut. Although I'm sure your sonic burst has put a hole in their gut.

But what else can possibly occur, wait your vision must blur, thinking one lane is the same as the next or, more than likely, the idiot was sending a text. Oh and lets jump in this lane because it's moving fast, whoops that didn't last. Now my other lane is moving fast, jump back over and that's a thing of the past. But if you would have stayed where you were, you'd be farther ahead and no ruffled fur.

Yippee things finally move along, you bob up and down to your song, yet still go much slower than the limit states, as you wave to your passing mates. Taking up half the road so no one can pass, figures it's a lass..LOL..hmmm should I have said that? Yeah for that one we'll blame Pat.

So whoever named it rush hour probably only drives at night and has no idea of the real plight. As the only rush to be seen, is watching the grass grow green, which happens faster most of the time, if only I had a dime. At least it wasn't to crass, although some may want to shoot my little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.


  1. We don't have those problems here in our land
    everyone that drives has manners just grand.
    Nobody rides your bumper trying to intimidate
    There's no driver on the road you wish to eliminate!
    Everyone is courteous and let's you go first!
    To steal your parking space would just be the worst!
    Nobody turns up the bass so their speakers burst your eardrum
    because doing something so rude just wouldn't be fun!
    Mufflers are always immediately replaced
    when they start growling all over the place.
    Exhaust systems are maintained so you don't make anyone behind you choke
    if you made too much smoke!
    We've never heard of road rage
    at any age!
    And everyone obeys the speed limit!
    To not to would make you a dimwit!
    Yes, we're as kind as can be
    in our automobiles, you see!

    NOT!!!! LOL!!!!

  2. hahaha I was just about to call BS until I got to the end
    As that would be a great trend
    Heck I'd want to live there
    Do fairies and leprechauns also play fair
    Are unicorns present during the day
    Do elves stray your way
    What about bigfoot and the yeti
    And some mystical ones from the serengeti
    Oh Santa and the Easter Bunny must take pride
    Knowing how everyone has such a safe ride
    And I know the truth of it all
    Why your traffic doesn't stall
    Because Elvis is alive and well as your king
    And he soothes everyones into obedience with each song he does sing...LOL

  3. LOL! Oh, my side hurts from laughing so hard!
    We should put this on a greeting card
    Saying Welcome to USA Wish Were Here!
    Yes, we have all of those creatures!
    We even have Yoda and kittens that resemble his features.
    And who wouldn't drive nice
    with Elvis lulling you to sleep as your fuzzy dice
    sway to the beat
    of his hips so neat.


  4. Shouldn't there be a "You" in there
    But with all the neat features I'm sure no one would care
    Mayberry sounds like it's gotten pretty hip
    Do you shove money in Elvis's belt for a tip
    Maybe pretty soon Mr. Sun will sing a song as well
    And you'll break out in a musical number singing Zippty Do Da walking beside a cow with a bell
    When the animals start to talk too
    I'd say someone slipped one too many of those parakeet drugs in your cup between me and you
    And when an Oompa Loompa rears its head
    Best bet is to hide under the bed
    But there could be a monster there
    Hmmm wouldn't want you to have a scare
    Then would you gonna call
    Oh wait suddenly you'd have Ghostbusters running down your hall
    What to do what to do
    Lets just hope the cow does nothing but moo...LOL

  5. Yes, insert a You
    as I was laughing hard and forgot a word or two!

    Well, the animals already talk here at my zoo
    Did you forget I was Dr. Doolittle, too?

    I was scared of the Oompa Loompas when I was a kid
    When they came on scene I'd close my eyelids!

    We don't really have Elvis in Mayberry
    Just Andy and his deputy.
    Except our guys are very fat.
    To run and catch someone they'd fall flat!
    Too many donuts I suspect
    And extenders on their seat belts, I'm going to guess.

  6. hahaha You don't like orange men
    Not one or ten
    They can rhyme rather well too
    Hmmmm I might have to touch on that in a post or two
    Oh I didn't forget
    For I have Dumbo here to remember every bit
    Those big ears take everything in
    I even gave him a pretty pin
    Probably a good thing there is no crime
    As if the thief ran up a hill and they had to climb
    They might fall over and roll back down
    Hey at least they wouldn't have to walk back across

  7. Oh, if they ever had to run up a hill
    it would be such a thrill
    to be a witness with camera in hand
    wouldn't that be just grand
    A fun post on my blog it would make
    Would a ticket it get me if in fun a did partake?

  8. Wouldn't be so much of a thrill if their belt was lose
    And you could see their caboose
    But yes a fun post that would make
    Maybe you should just hire a guy to make a mistake
    Then give them a chase
    As long as he could win the race
    And you duck behind a pine
    All will be fine
    Then you'll have a new post
    Just don't ever let them see where you host

  9. There is absolutely no chance in hell that their belt would be loose.
    No, they are as big as a caboose.
    Tight is the only thing their clothes and belt are.
    At least their shirts are long enough so no skin shows near or far!

  10. Well at least if I drive through there I know I can speed
    Don't even need to get a good lead
    As with them weighing down the car
    I'll be able to outrun them with a hardy har har
    Yeah if I said that I'd be even more of a nut
    And it's good that no skin shows on their butt or gut

  11. You better not take the chance
    doing the speeding dance!
    as if you ended up in jail
    I just know you'd start to wail
    as they don't serve chicken nuggets there
    and Pringles can't be found anywhere!

  12. hahaha I'd fake dead
    When they zipped up the bag and put me in one of those drawers to bed
    I'd break free
    And laugh with glee
    As I scared everybody waking out the door
    And they wouldn't bother me

  13. I don't think you'd have to fake
    if they served spaghetti on your plate!

  14. Yeah I'd prob peel over and die right there
    As just the smell I couldn't bear

  15. sorry to interupt the convo you two
    see if i can slip a word in too, into, N2...sorry got stuck there,skipping record, not like def leopard though, but on traffic, it can be drastic, starting at 4 until the last ones out the door and home, sick i tell you, i try to stay away from the main thoroughfares, to keep my hairs from coming undone, not fun to sit and suck exhaust, imagine the medical costs it will occur over years, does not take a seer, and the stress, dear lord blessed, flipping birds and horns, no one ever learns, perhaps we can let them know the number two, fingers that is, peace bro, peace love and somedays its better to stay home...good night betsy, good night pat, goodnight moon and good night cat.

  16. Good night Brian
    Good night Pat
    Good night Orlin
    and Good night Cass.

  17. Hi! Pat Hatt, Betsy and Brian...
    Omg! This conversation don't lack [words...]Therefore, Betsy, Brian and Pat "Hatt," I will be right "back" later "today" in order to read your post and add to the "fray." lol
    deedee :-D

  18. Ever been stuck on Airport Hill
    When the first snow of the season starts to spill
    Those fools at those lights
    Are terrible frights
    Especially when they make it through
    And barrel down the 102!
    This is why I like the country
    Where we drive in PJ's comfy
    While we wait for cows to cross
    We all just play washer toss!
    And if you're stuck behind Farmer Joe
    Don't fret, that's as fast as his tractor goes
    So just wait for broken line
    And pass him doing 29!
    So good morning and good day
    I've been here and had my say

  19. A word is always welcome by you
    Even if your record skips in a place or two
    Maybe some of that polish is what you need
    It supposedly works from what I read
    Yes the medical costs alone
    Are worth staying home and using the phone
    Of course that supposedly kills you too
    Not much one can do
    Yes I've seen the bird flipped many times
    From those I know I also got a peace sign inbetween the bird flipping chimes
    So good morning all
    Once again the rain does fall

    Oh look you were a copy cat
    With your good night

    Add to the fray you will
    Oh that could be a thrill
    Seeing how you will suck up this time
    Maybe you'll even bring along a mime
    Oh that would just be sad
    Have I made you

    Oh I didn't even touch on the snow
    That's a whole different fear you know
    With such friggin nuts around here
    You don't want to be anywhere near
    Yes the country is easier to get around
    Unless a cow won't move the horn you have to pound
    That's two days in a row you had your say
    Hmmm one more and you might cause dismay

  20. Hi! Pat Hatt...
    After reading this post I found it to be spot-on...Thanks, for sharing!

    Unfortunately, I don't "drive," but when in a car I'm always on the passenger "side" and I think that some drivers should have their license "revoked...

    ...However, if I say this to their face I'm quite sure a fight this would "provoke" and then I would have to take "flight" because I don't want to get into a "fight!" Omg! I just had a terrible thought and since I don't have a "car" I most definitely, can't go very "far!"

    I'm quite sure they will catch me and beat me "up" and knock me right on my
    [Please pardon, not pardom me, but "_utt!"]

    deedee ;-D

  21. Pat Hatt said,"Oh look you were a copy cat
    With your good night"

    That's not true! [As I poke-out my lower lip!]

    "Add to the fray you will
    Oh that could be a thrill
    Seeing how you will suck up this time
    Maybe you'll even bring along a mime
    Oh that would just be sad
    Have I made you"

    Oh! no, Pat, never sad or mad...If only your name wasn't Pat Hatt, but "Steven," all I would ever do is not get mad, but..."even!" LOL!!!!

    The Suck-Up!

  22. Yes you seem to get confused easily I will admit
    Maybe you should have another coffee or something as you sit
    Could widen your eyes
    Helping you see through my

    Yes it is pretty spot on
    And some people shouldn't even be able to mow their lawn
    As they are that dumb
    And deserve a kick in the bum
    But I have a car
    So I can take off and go quite far
    Plus it's good on gas
    Even with my mass
    So they'll never find me
    Here at bush number three
    And you don't have a vechile you say
    Geez sucking up to others to drive you around to

    I know one Steven and he's a douche bag
    As he wouldn't even play

    But there is space inbetween the comments back
    So if you look closely you'll see who I attack
    But just in case you don't get this one from me
    This is for you DEEDEE
    Can you see
    Happy that I at least once answered you plea

  23. I wish people would drive mellow-er, but not too slow. I don't want to rush, but I do want to GO. 50MPH when the limit is 65 makes it quite hard for the traffic flow to thrive! :)

  24. This is true and we are even slower up here between me and you. The limit is 50KM here, which is much slower I fear and yet they still won't go that fast, I guess they want to make the trip last.