Saturday, October 15, 2011

Does That Bridge Send You Over The Ridge?

A bridge does send you over stuff. That I know so do not get in a huff. The cat was asking if it made you nuts because of all the traveling people with the brain shuts. Yes! People of Globland. I coined a new term and it had nothing do to with a germ. Seems to be so many people around, that act dumb and can easily be found. That it's like their brain has been shut off or they drank from a poisoned horse trough.

So from now one there will be no long winded rhyme about how people seem dense most of the time. I will just say they have the brain shuts. Oh! I know I am already nuts. But rub it in if you must. I hope I did not leave you in digust. If you suffer from the brain shuts your way. I am....I am...ummm okay, not so sorry for the dismay.

Now back on track, going on about the nuts who cannot seem to cross a bridge without a brain shuts attack.

What to do, What to do
When bridge nuts shout ballyhoo!

So you have an empty fridge,
And the grocery store lies over a bridge.
What can you do?
To avoid the bridge nuts in your view.

Swing like a monkey under it.
You'd be a sure fire circus hit.
Might drop some groceries on the way back.
Depending upon how you stack.

Or you could just give a quack,
And swim across if you have the knack.
Could catch a free fish too.
Polluted dinner all ready for you.

Of course you could use a canoe.
And give yourself a toxic shampoo.
Then you'd be glowy and bright.
And Santa could ask you to lead his sleigh Christmas night.

But if it is all rock.
Latch onto a geese flock.
They will honk and clear a path.
Although you may be in need of a bath.

As they just let their dung fly.
Oh that would be nasty to have dung eye.
Hop on a pogo stick.
Or listen for the banjos of some hick.

That right there will make you run.
Even the bridge nuts you will stun.
Could have took that boat.
But they just passed a vote.

So you are out of luck.
As some senator wants to pocket the cash for a new truck.
Steal it and play Dukes of Hazzard.
Just get a good lawyer and say the truck was a biohazard.

If you don't want to risk a limp.
Go out and get a blimp.
But that could go pop.
And you could go plop.

Or rather splat.
Hmm is that roadkill a dog or cat?
Now don't flip your lid.
Look what I did.

Don't you like the bridge that much more.
Aren't you glad you came ashore.
The bridge nuts will still be there.
But just say a prayer.

Flip them the bird and continue to swear.
Letting them know brain shuts syndrome is oozing out their hair.
And they belong in day care.
For there is only room for one in solitaire.

The cat just went off there, as brain shuts syndrome abounds here so beware! For the bridges seem to have an accident every second day. I guess more than one lane causes too much dismay. So the bridge Face it Facts are through. I do not know how much of it is true. But brain shuts syndrome seems to be growing in mass. It is quite scary to my little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

35 comments:

  1. I think you need to demonstrate us this poem in a form of a video, Pats! So, many lovely visuals it would have ... I volunteer to be the director and a costume designer :)

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  2. Wow! getting across a bridge is no mean feat to say the least. Countless ways offering various choices can certainly create a brain shut. Best of luck to those who try!

    Hank

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  3. Hi there,
    Thankyou so much for stopping by my blog. I have popped over from alex's blogfest. Lovely to meet you and you have a new follower. xoxo
    Eve. :)

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  4. But there is one issue you didn't address
    and one I'm worried about I must confess.
    I there a troll under that bridge there?
    He could sabotage all attempts to cross, so beware!
    He could even eat you alive
    just so he could survive
    another day in Globland
    wouldn't that be grand.

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  5. trolls under bridges only those that cost tolls, bridges over troubled water is no hotter than this trip across the which seperates and sets the slate, pat/cat you are great

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  6. Don't tell him he's great
    his head is growing at an alarming rate!
    lol...

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  7. hahaha man you are crazy. You are like the whitest nerdiest (and probably funniest) rapper around.

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  8. I read your poems more like a song. I still say you should try singing them in public like a coffee house or just on the street and see what happens!

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  9. Late blog-hopper dropping by. Nice to meet another Canadian blogger. I hail from the west coast (the rainforest).

    I like cats and have had many. I have a guest post by my old pet on this other blog I maintain if you'd like to check it out. (yeah, after he'd elevated himself to cat heaven)

    http://dghudson.blogspot.com/2011/04/street-cat-tale.html

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  10. Yeah it seems to be contagious too, spend too long in the immediate vicinity, you'll find yourself doing something reeking of idiocy. A bridge is a great metaphor here- love how you used it. I fear some day brain shuts will the normalcy, and no longer will their be brain farts, nope, instead they'll be "oh, wow he's having a brain smart moment" yep when the abnormal becomes the normal, the normal becomes the abnormal-thanks for identifying the problem, and with medicinal rhyme bridging that gap- There is hope, albeit small. Knowing is half the battle- GO JOE- yep, brain shut time for me:)

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  11. I live on an Island so I know all about bridges their constant delays. I should print this out and post it on my dashboard. It might help with the road rage!

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  12. Any chance of you recording this in a video? :P

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  13. It would be a good rap video ^^

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  14. Brain shuts. I get them all the time. Nice to meet you Pat in the Hatt, who likes to rhyme all the time. ;)

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  15. think i would Swing like a monkey under it
    and sing the latest peter maffay hit which says
    there are seven bridges you have to cross
    and it is no candy floss
    but can be depressing at times and this is
    when the world just no longer rhymes....smiles

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  16. haha Okay you volunteeer to do it
    So I won't take a pay hit
    And we'll give it a go
    Could be quite the show..haha

    No, not an easy feat at all
    Whether the bridge is short or tall
    Those brain shuts make it that much more rough
    Can really be quite tough

    Followed back too
    And will pop around for a view

    The troll is afraid of me
    I rhyme so much that he gets confused you see
    And then he goes and pays me a fee
    And I get money and pass for free
    So my rhyming does pay
    To the trolls dismay..haha

    Pat and cat are great
    Ego does inflate
    Ignore your twin
    It isn't a sin..haha
    Yes those toll ones are quite the trolls indeed
    Sitting there watching their money counter feed

    Toooo late
    I'm just great...haha

    Oh I will be the first to admit I'm a crazy nut
    Stuck in a rhyming rut..haha

    Yeah if you want to sing be my guest
    I'm sure you could do it the best
    Me I would send everyone for the hills
    Or make them start popping pills..haha

    A fellow Canadian too
    Blog hopped around for a view
    Cats make great posts
    As all who knows from being hosts

    That will be a sad day
    When the norm is to be bright your way
    Never thought of it like that
    But it is surely true at any mat
    The norm will be to be good
    And change fast that should
    Go JOE hahaha
    Yes a brain shut moment did show

    Yeah if I had the stuff
    It would not be rough
    But the cat be be scared away
    And wouldn't want to play

    Me and rap just would not do
    I'd send everybody running away to the loo..haha

    hahaha you can keep the brain shuts your way
    They must cause dismay
    Yes I rhyme all the time
    That's not too much of a crime

    Yes that would be quite depressing
    Although I am guessing
    The world could never make me lose rhyme
    At least not for a very long time
    So be a monkey
    And swing free..haha

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  17. Excellent work man. You're actually lyrically really good, you're quite the words smith! Keep it up!

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  18. I would not fear a nasty troll!
    I'd get the jerk under control!
    He'd suffer
    worse than mere "brain shuts!"
    The Fox would kick him in the...


    Ummmm...

    Never mind.

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  19. So nice to find your blog,
    Although your timing makes me feel like a frog.

    Yup, I sog.

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  20. some seriously creative wordplay skills my friend.

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  21. I have the brain shuts cuz I never get fucked. Who will save MY little rhyming ass?

    Love,
    Lola

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  22. It amazes me how you write such wonderful poetry every day. You're a powerhouse!

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  23. "Brain shuts." That describes it exactly!

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  24. Words smith I can be
    Plus a nut at my rhyming sea..haha

    hahaha what you are to say nuts
    Or would it be guts
    Or maybe butts
    Or kick his mutts
    I'm just confused now
    Are he a cow..haha

    Oh don't feel like a frog
    I leave many in the fog
    Here at my log
    Making some think like a dog
    Guess it beats the frog though
    Here at the cats show

    Creative I will continue to be
    As I go about my rhyming sea

    Maybe you should try a bar
    I hear that can help things go rather far..haha

    I'm not sure poetry is the word for my insane ranting about
    But I suppose it can be with each rhyming shout
    It just pops on out
    Each day so none will get withdraw and pout

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  25. haha yeah brain shuts works rather well
    Good thing they have it or they might give me old hell

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  26. This was nicer on the eyes. I like.

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  27. haha yeah I had to
    As tomorrow's wil lmake you go blind, sorry it's true..haha

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  28. whew what a trip to the bridge
    that made me check my fridge
    yep i still got the stuff
    though most of it leave over
    from thanksgiving i missed home
    no, not from brain nuts syndrome

    happy weekend ~

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  29. Oh my gosh, so much exciting stuff to read here. Thanks so much for stopping by my blog, and I can't wait to explore yours some more! :)

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  30. While the words flow from your brain, today the words stutter and shutter from mine.

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  31. haha good thing your fridge is filled up
    Now there is no need for a bridge hiccup
    Guess thanksgiving is stll giving
    And glad you are in the brain shuts and among the living..haha

    Insane and maybe make one pop a vein
    But exciting I gues I can be, even though I bring some pain.
    But regret exploring my tour though
    Losing a vein or to as they go pop from my show..haha

    We all have our off days
    Just need some sunny rays
    And they will come back
    And you will no longer stutter or shutter at my rhyme shack
    That might not be true
    As that stuff I can make one do..haha

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  32. Really like this bridge..
    crossing it is so much fun :)

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  33. I like to rhyme some of the time. I mean it -- anybody want a peanut? Good stuff, dude. Thanks for dropping by my blog.

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  34. haha crossing it for real may not be
    But it would be fun to see..haha

    Thanks for that
    From the cat

    Nah peanut's don't do it for the cat
    No problem fun time at your mat

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