Wednesday, November 23, 2011

Rhyme Time Saves! Even Those In Caves!

Did you know I was doing you all a favor? Yes, even you, you back shaver. For if the cat was not such a nut and stuck in a rhyming rut things could get dire. Your car could pop a tire and send you into the ditch. You could also get a rather weird itch.

As you see no more rhyme to quell your nutty side makes you want to do other things in stride. So be thankful I am around or really bad things may be found.

With no release,
Your bad mood could increase.
Giving you a full crack,
Being anal as can be at your shack.

You might actually "gasp" do work.
And not come here to lurk.
You may lose control,
And go on a rhyming roll.

For with no comments below,
Giving you a way to let them flow.
You have to get them out some way.
That could just ruin your day.

You may actually fall for a dog.
After getting drunk on egg nog.
It is the holidays after all.
Anything can happen at your hall.

Your face could freeze all vile,
For you won't crack a smile.
Then you'd look like frogman.
Could be a superhero with a green tan.

You may get lost,
And that could cost.
Going on a trip,
Or boarding a cruise ship.

When really you could save,
And be at my cave.
Even avoid a back shave.
Although with that things could get grave.

Also no Face it Facts.
How would you ever get info on certain acts?
You'd fall through the cracks.
Or lie down and get smushed on train tracks.

And you may even get so bored,
That oh my lord!
You do a little diddy and become pregnant.
You are so flagrant!

What? You are a guy?
Damn! Now now don't cry.
Junior did it first try.
But you can take a deep sigh.

For thanks to me,
Such a sight you don't have to see.
Aren't you glad for bush number three?
Stopping you from even a spending spree.

So there you go. Thanks to my show you now know that I am keeping your rear clear, your face in place, making you avoid a butt sniffing mutt, keeping the world free of pregnant men and allowing you to achieve your zen. I guess I better never stop my sass and for the sake of all let's hope you never hear the last of my little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

41 comments:

  1. I'm no back shaver! I have a helper monkey to do it for me!

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  2. I have my back waxed. The hair doesn't grow back as fast.

    Love,
    Lola

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  3. back hair is a problem?

    i braid mine it makes for a comfortable place to lay, when i watch the tele

    oh my, i think i just threw up in my mouth,
    the comments i think might head south.

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  4. hahaha that monkey got a crummy job
    Taking off glob after glob

    I suppose that is the way to go
    So no hair does show

    Wow you can reach around and braid it yourself
    Quite talented you are at your shelf
    Yeah I can see them heading south too
    Oh well will be fun to view

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  5. To be a real back shaver
    You need hair to shave
    There's none there though
    Only at couple other place
    To braid the ones there
    Unlike that of a shoe lace

    Hank

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  6. I've always suspected that your rhymes are saving my wretched life all along, but was too proud to admit it :)

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  7. Grateful for Bush #3!! Thanks for the fun ride..

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  8. LOL Are you trying to say that you should be on our "Gives Thanks" list for tomorrow? I will sit at the table and proclaim "I am Thankful for the rhyming cat since he provides a great distraction at work, several laughs, and for preventing me from suffering from Hulk-like symptons".

    As far as you keeping the world free from pregnant men, I'm going to challenge this statement. It was all over the news just a year ago, that there was in fact a pregnant man. Sigh...That poor man that you didn't save...

    I would wish you a Happy Thanksgiving, but I'm assuming you don't celebrate! So, Happy Thursday? :)

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  9. Yeah the cat has it all over
    And would attack like a vicious rover
    If Pat tried to shame him
    A couple other place might get a trim
    On the head that is
    Oh this truly went into some scary biz..haha

    Well at least you finally came out with it
    Or could be I'm killing you as you sit
    Instead of getting out and exercising or something
    But we'll ignore that and go with the first ring

    Glad that ride was fun
    With the tale I spun

    hahaha well that little voice inside my head quelled my ego a bit
    So I didn't really come out and say it with my rhyming fit
    But the cat wouldn't want to stop such a thing
    For one giving him a thanksgiving ring
    Those hulk like symptoms could be good too
    With hulk smash and a huge jump from you
    You'll be at work in no time
    Of course those Japenses might mistake your for Godzilla and knock you down in your prime
    With 7 billion people you can't save them all
    He just had to go and answer some cat call
    Thanksgiving for us was a month or so ago
    Not sure it will be a Happy Thursday with all this STUPID snow..haha

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  10. Do people shave their backs? What a world we live in.

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  11. It's a face it fact that you're undeniably awesome man!

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  12. I had no idea this was a public service blog. I feel so ashamed.

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  13. I can't keep my thought off a superhero with green tan ;)

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  14. haha God only knows
    We always hit new lows

    That's a nice face it fact
    About the cat and his act

    hahaha maybe I need to put a special announcement before each post
    So all will realize I create offer a public service with each boast

    haha well that could be the hulk
    He sure has the green tan and much bulk

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  15. Thanks for keeping me out of trouble. I'd rather be rhyming.

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  16. That's right--you better never stop.

    Oh and I love how so many of these comments are about hairy backs/back shaving/back in general LOL!

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  17. HULK is there... what can i do for you ? :D ;)

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  18. Yes much easier to rhyme
    The get thrown in the klink for a crime

    I will try never to stop
    Unless my muse decided to flop
    Yeah people seem to have something against back shavers and/or backs
    Hopefully I don't hand out heart attacks..haha

    Hulk would not ask what he could do
    Hulk would just smash you

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  19. I'm just waiting for the...
    "Their once was a man from Nantucket" rhyme :)

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  20. Bones is trying to get Pat to use his Rhyming powers for evil! Don't turn to the dark side, Pat! 8p

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  21. Oh my gosh. I never thought of this blog as birth control
    Guess I'll never leave now after that stroll.
    Certainly don't want another son
    no, not even one.
    Five men are quite enough
    thanks for telling me this stuff.

    I'm so glad my twin and I aren't identical.
    That braided back hair sounds sinful.
    Mine is nice and hairless smooth
    TMI? well, not in context of this comment groove.
    lol....

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  22. omg...visiting each other simultaneously
    wish i had a loonie and toonie for the times that's happened. Really!

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  23. haha nantucket I can do
    And **** it won't come into view

    I will never go to the darkside
    Although I may once in a while go for a ride

    hahaha glad the cat can help with that
    But what's one more at your mat..haha
    Yes one thing about your twin
    That for you would not be a win
    Braided back hair and a mohawk
    Many people might gawk..haha
    Bah TMI never comes here
    Well maybe for some things could strike fear

    haha yeah we'd be rich if that were the case
    You a little more at your place
    With the exchange rate and all
    But I won't get jealous as the cash starts to fall..haha

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  24. Lolll okay, okay. Thank you.

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  25. hahaha glad you see it my way
    The cat will graciously accept your thank you today..haha

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  26. You or your cats could all find work in a beauty salon. Waxing backs to pay your tax. Luckily, I don't have back hair to worry about, andddd having said that I will say no more !~! Hehe

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  27. Odd amount of back shaving going on in todays post haha.

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  28. You have saved my neighbor from a good old fashioned bitch slap. Wish she has coming, really she does, she's a real cunt. I bet she even shaves her back. But now I feel strangely satisfied, sane, lucid even. Oh my, I'm going to have to do something about that.

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  29. Jesus Christ, I said wish when I meant wich. Typo or freudian slip?

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  30. I love how you put "crack" and "anal" in the same stanza.
    How'd you know I was a back shaver?

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  31. Pat you cat have a lot of licenses you know:)
    Pat have a nice and happy Thanksgiving:)

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  32. Better shave back than be like wookiee :P

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  33. Thanks for keeping my rear clear, it's a big job:) Nice piece, and I was rhyming all day, just laying in bed, in the shower, feeding the dogs-(they weren't too pleased as all they wanted was food, so they thought singing along would quicken things up-it didn't) Anyhow, lots of funny nuggets here, and man, when I got to the guy getting pregnant part I was going to drop in that Junior bit, but then few lines down you beat me to it. And I thought I'd up the cat at his own shore-guess it ain't ever gonna happen. Anyhow, great fun tonight, thanks for the write and Happy Thanksgiving, although I don't think you celebrate it, oh, well I have Jewish friends that celebrate Christmas so guess all's fair when it comes to overeating and laying on the couch-lol See ya later.

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  34. Ewww working there would stir up my ocd
    And Orlin might leave scratches along with Cassie
    So that wouldn't get us much tips
    They might even break some hips
    And what no more
    That deserves an encore..haha

    Yes there does seem to be
    Who knew hairy backs were had by so many

    hahaha see I told you I save
    Even help you from putting your neighbor in an early grave
    Although I made you sane that is new
    Usually people go insane from a view

    Go with the later and it will make you look great
    So with the first and seal your typo fate..haha

    hahaha yeah both just seemed to fit
    Making one stand and not sit
    You're a back shaver too
    Geez all these back shavers coming to view..haha

    A license here a license there
    The cat just has a lot of hair..haha

    True to that
    Although the wookie cry would be fun to hear by the cat

    hahaha It's a dirty job but some one has to do it
    Even if it gives my ocd a fit..haha
    hahaha poor dogs having to wait for their lunch
    Trying to sing but not even getting some Captain Crunch
    Yeah the Junior bit popped in as I went along
    Beating me at movies would just be all wrong
    Our thanks giving was over a month ago
    You guys are just a tad slow..haha

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  35. Hey, I'm all about achieving zen!

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  36. Hello thanks for commenting on my blog!!! Cool blog I will be following! If anyone else is interested I do tech updates and random things!

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  37. nice with some spice

    See I help out with your zen
    Here at my rhyming pen

    Random things you say
    Oh that's just a whole can of worms your opened at my bay

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  38. I never really understand,
    So I don't bother make any sense and stand,
    Perhaps I need a cruise,
    before I hit that booze.

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  39. haha that's good that you sit
    Or you may fall over and have a fit
    Then blame poor me
    When really it was the booze you see..haha

    Happy Thanksgiving back
    Even if it's way over at my rack..haha

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