Thursday, December 15, 2011

The Cat Got A Frog Suit And Can Play a Flute!

I was minding my own business once more and I heard a knock at the door. I knew unless by some fluke, it couldn't be that Drazin mook. For I would have heard his name a thousand times already, as he says it quite steady. But still after all the crap. I ignored them and took a nap. The knocking ceased as I rested my head and it wasn't until I awoke that I was filled with dread.

I was standing looking all 2D and things were truly crazy. A turtle with a snapping yap and a hole in the ground laid out like a trap, quickly came into view. This could not be true. I jumped on the turtles head and kicked the shell. I hit a block and out came a mushroom. Really, what the hell?

I grew in size as it hit my hand and as I made my way through this strange land, out popped a leaf like it fell off a tree. I was such a sight to see. It now turns out when I ran really fast I could fly, but sadly I can still fall down the hole and die.

But it seemed if I collected lots of coins just hanging in the air, death wasn't such a scare. I just came back alive, if I took a nosedive. Who left these coins all over anyway? A litterbug that didn't want to pay? After collecting more and not wanting an encore, I thought this thing was through when I reached a black screen, popping a ever changing block and ending the scene. But that was only the start and it was the least toughest part.

It seems some Koopa clan were not a fan. Larry, Morton and Roy, oh joy! Don't they sound so threatening and scary? But Ludwig Von Koopa sounded a bit contrary. It seems I had to jump on their head in order to make them dead. All this head jumping seems to be their version of humping. Except those spiky things, I guess that's the equivalent of catching a disease after one too many flings. You attack those from far away. Sounds about right, wouldn't you say?

But that wasn't even the beginning of my fun, as there was even a crazy attacking sun. It chased me through a big litter box. Thankfully I got a flute and bypassed some locks. I turned into a frog and could hop, I had a shell head and let the hammers drop and I even turned into a raccoon. That was a terrible ordeal for this loon.

Plants came out of tubes snapping, some ghosts started flapping and did I mention I could shoot fireballs? Too bad they couldn't bounce off the walls. I had to swim too. The cat doesn't mind the bathtub or sink in the loo, but going so deep into the sea did not delight me. I could also sit on my butt and slide down a hill, knocking out all the bad guys, what a thrill.

I got asked where some Yoshi pet was and apparently a Luigi was jealous just because he felt overshadowed by me. Some Peach I had to free. Why couldn't it just be an apple? Oh right! Eve already gave that a grapple. I even heard of a Birdo, was it a cross between a bird and a deer? I don't know.

Finally there was the big bossman. He floated about in some tin can. It had a happy face too. That just made him sooo much more scarier then his Koopa crew. After Wendy O. Koopa and that pink bow, that really is hard to do you know. So King Koopa gave a laugh sounding like some crossbred giraffe. Pffft and I thought Drazin was a loon. But I guess he was happy because he replaced some Donkey Kong baboon. Like throwing barrels is hard to top. I guess that's what started this sock hop.

After a while the poor lizard thing fell upside down and I jumped on the kingly one smushing his crown. I was then able to reach that pink Peach, as she was no longer out of reach. But the king swore his revenge on me. I guess this was only part three. Then I received a letter from the Peach because I guess she really wanted to teach. Like being royalty isn't enough. I'm sure she has it so rough. As I read an item showed up and it was in the shape of a trophy cup.

It said I had won and now was done. I guess some plumber named Mario needed a break and they thanked me as the ground began to quake. It opened up and sucked me in and thanks to my great big win, I now was returned home. I think I really need to build a force field dome. The crazies won't leave me be or I need a more threatening bush number three. I do feel bad killing turtles in mass. Yet that is what you get when you try and bite my little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

39 comments:

  1. oh, Pat you evil Cat, how can you mention a cat in a frog suit and not give us a pic of it???? You are cold hearted and cruel towards us!

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  2. I was too busy avoiding jellyfish and snapping fish
    To grant your picture wish
    But I like being cruel
    Although not like King K. Rool

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  3. I love that game! Was Mario really a plumber or did you make that up?

    and I want a Yoshi. I always thought he was so cute :)

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  4. Nope he was a plumber and Luigi too
    They could unclog your loo..haha
    Even with that long drooly tongue of his?
    Plus he craps out eggs like it's his biz..haha

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  5. I had an experience like that once! But it might have been just a game!

    (I didn't get what the title was referencing till I started reading the poem! Now that I look at it it just seems so obvious!)

    This is one of my favorites! It brightened my day! Thanks!

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  6. ha. i have just recently introduced my boys to the magic of mario, its those turtles you got to watch out for...bounce right back sliding on the floor knock you on your but and you have lives no more...

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  7. haha yeah sometimes my titles can seem strange
    But that will soon change
    I hope you beat that Koopa clown
    And made his floating thingy frown
    A favorite too
    Glad I didn't leave you blue

    Yeah those snapping things bite you good
    Avoid them you should
    Falling on them in just the wrong way
    Can end your play
    Mario beats 90% of the crap out now a days too
    Even with all the advancements it's sad but true

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  8. Looks like Orlin has indulged in too much catnip! And to quote from an old post of mine, I do not endorse "the supposedly-therapeutic effects of catnip or other kitty stimulants, and furthermore [do] not advocate substance abuse among felines, canines, porcupines, Gregory Hines, power lines, clinging vines, land mines, venetian blinds, melon rinds, street signs, or anything else, for that matter!!!" 'Nuff said.

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  9. So it's okay to indulge in fine wines?
    Thanks for the warning on the land mines..haha
    Orlin sure likes the catnip though
    Takes the bag and off he'll go

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  10. seriously you should write a book for child !

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  11. Orson only likes home-grown. That's not a funny drug reference, either. My sister has a catnip plant in her yard, and he goes nuts when she brings some freshly picked from her garden!

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  12. I could do the writing part
    Just no chance on the art..haha

    Neither Orlin or Cassie have had homegrown
    Orlin isn't fussy, this is known
    Cassie only likes a certain kind
    Sure homegrown they'd lose their mind..haha

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  13. lol @ a plumber named Mario. Great post

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  14. haha he likes plumbing those tubes
    And hitting those cubes
    Yes, I realize that can be taken so wrong
    But just hum the mario theme song

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  15. I want a pic of it too LOL!

    Oh and I love this line; it describes my life today ;)
    "It now turns out when I ran really fast I could fly, but sadly I can still fall down the hole and die."

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  16. Yeah, I'm with Dezmond there. And the flute, it needed the flute too.

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  17. haha this pic craze
    It might set your eyes ablaze
    hahaha hmmm that might not be a good day
    If that hole sucked you down at your bay

    Geez, you know the cat gives a toot
    In order to play the flute
    Still want to see
    Could be rather scary

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  18. Haha... having played Super Mario and been frustrated as all hell at keep having to go back to start all over again hundreds of times, I can tell you, it's been a LONG time since I last had a go, so long in fact I was going to say I want to go where you're in the sky and coins are all there ... took me til I'd done reading this and seen the name Mario to realise.. that was what it was with coins in the air... talk about duhhh... must be time for a nap LOLOL

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  19. Stepping through the screen and becoming part of the game, like Alice through the looking glass. I was surprised at how many people didn't know that the Mario and Luigi were plumbers. My hubby loves this game. I always enjoy watching him curse at the screen when he's playing it. Classic Nintendo, love it.

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  20. Phew, even if I don't play computer games, I knew that Super Mario and Luigi are, in fact, plummers. I need to read your post to my nine-year-old computer wiz, he will LOVE it! :-)

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  21. hahaha I can imagine the Bloody Hell's being thrown out
    As you die and shout
    At least you figured it out before said something
    So it wasn't as embarassing..hahaha
    Better get that nap though
    Then give Mario another go

    Yeah kind of surprises me too
    Considering all those tubes that come into view
    I've sent many a curse it's way as well
    But shhh don't tell
    I am supposed to be pg cat after all
    Here at my hall..haha

    Technology can be a pain
    Make one pop a vein
    A nice trip I had
    Although Bowser got mad

    See you knew too
    LMF shame on you
    Computer wiz's are more in the know
    So could like my current show

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  22. this has me hankering for my old NES sitting in the closet that works randomly when it wants =/

    greatest nostalgia!

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  23. Makes me almost want to pick up that game
    so I can flee from turtles and get some fame.
    Wouldn't want to fall in a hole and die
    so I'd better be good at it if I try!

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  24. I'm sorry. It's all too much for me tonight. I'm tired and my hair looks a fright. I hope I'll be in better form tomorrow. Lots of fun and zero sorrow.

    Love,
    Lola

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  25. An interesting journey for a fun game..ha..ha..
    Donkey Kong baboon and plumber Mario..okay...have a great night ~

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  26. Yeah my NES only works when you blow in it
    Then give it a good hit..haha

    That game is so old who knows where it could be
    Maybe at some auction you will see
    Watch out for those holes though
    Although some lead to secrets just so you know

    I guess you can't be fun all the time
    But at least you can rhyme
    Hopefully the sorrow will pass
    And you'll be back to berate my little rhyming ass

    Baboons and Plumbers are quite the sight
    One throws barrels and one jumps ready to fight

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  27. If I had read this a few months earlier I wouldn't have had any idea what you were talking about; thanks to watching hankgames I recognized it mid-post. :P

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  28. Hmmm well until now I had no idea about hankgames one bit
    Glad he helped you see and I'll have to search around his youtube pit

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  29. Oh, I've missed your rhyming. That game has given me nightmares before. Those darn plumbers.

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  30. The game has given you nightmares you say
    That never has occured my way
    Missed my rhyming though
    Awww that's nice to hear at my show

    Yeah I'm crazy
    But can't say I'm lazy

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  31. Don't tell PETA. They'll come after you for harming those poor turtles. :P

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  32. Mario is such a fun
    that I can never get bore of it..

    n I can never get bored from ur cat too :P
    specially when she can play flute :)

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  33. I love this stuff Pat, I wish I was as good as you man, excellent stuff!

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  34. hahaha can they come after an animal for harming another one
    Is that just for humans under the sun

    Yeah mario is quite fun
    Especailly when you've won
    Never bore of the cat
    He sure likes that

    I can still huff and puff
    And have excellent stuff

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  35. Wow, you weren't kidding, Perhaps I gained a little of that psychic feed. Mario madness here at your bay. Love the game and the translation in the feline way. Fun, fun and yeah Ludwig did sound more menacing. Favorite part was the spikes and disease idea. Well done. Thanks

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  36. hahaha yeah the disease idea just popped in
    As I gave the spiky guy a spin
    I guess a little psychic-ness did come your way
    Really knew what was coming next here at my bay
    But do it twice
    Come on roll the dice..haha

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