But back story is what you all want right? So I won't fail this time in that plight. I will give you the Face it Facts of how Tarsier Man came to be. Warning! He is one ugly sight to see. Just look! With that face one could write a book.
How Tarsier Man Came to Be,
Told by, well umm me.
There was no spider bite,
Or ooze on that dark night.
No magic ring,
Or gamma radiation thing.
The Tarsier simply turned its head.
A whole 360 degrees. Yeah, that's what I said.
He kept turning and turning it around,
Finding himself rising off the ground.
Before long he was six feet tall,
Delighted and yelling out his Tarsier call.
He knew other Tarsiers jealousy would rise,
So he went out and got a disguise.
He tried the red and blue,
But they just would not do.
The yellow and blue were nice,
But feared the adamantium slice.
The ripped shorts were too purple and bright.
He feared the plastic nipples of the dark knight.
And he knew glasses,
Should only fool dumb asses.
So he dawned a full face ninja mask,
Leaving his eyes free for the task.
He made some ear holes too,
Making it all the better to hear you.
Next he scrapped some bark from a tree,
And glued together a suit for free.
With his mask and bark,
He made his way through the dark.
A dastardly Hippo was eating a plant,
And did not notice the scurrying ant.
So he sprang into action,
Sensing an attraction.
He grabbed the ant gaining much praise.
Then he ate the ant thinking how saving pays.
He continued his force for good.
Reaching higher heights than any normal Tarsier could.
Finally moving up from insect to human saving.
He just loved their appreciative waving.
Then he came across two cats,
Yes! They were those of Pat's.
They were doing battle with Drazin the mook.
So he crept in like a ghostly spook.
But Drazin would have none of him,
And choked him until his lights went dim.
WHAMMO! His eyes popped from his head.
Hitting Drazin in the face causing him dread.
He now had a new superpower.
While Drazin felt disgusted and had to shower.
So with his 360 degree head twist,
Eyes popping from his skull for the assist,
And big ears that hear all.
Tarsier Man awaits your call.
He travels the sands,
Searching the lands.
For all in need.
Trying to do a good deed.
So crooks beware!
He will find your secret lair.
And with his popping eyes,
Find the truth through the lies.
The Tarsier Man will save the day.
He's only a phone call away.
P.S. Long distance charges apply.
Even if he can't make it and you die.
Now was that not fun? Just looking at Tarsier Man will make the bad guys run. Those eyes are just scary. Maybe he ate too much dairy? Either way with him I'll take a pass. I think I could do much better saving my own little rhyming ass.
Later all, have a nice fall.