Tuesday, January 17, 2012

In The Corner Of My Eye Prompted This dVerse Children's Reply!

Mary took my whale that can grow a tree and said I should write a children's book at my sea. So I figured what the heck I'd do a dVerse kiddie trek.

A Whale Of A Tale

Standing Turtle and Invisible Flea
Had found an island with a tree.
They lied back in the sand,
Finding the shade and privacy grand.

Home had become too stale,
They wished they could set sail.
Dreaming of lands afar,
And wishing upon a star.

Standing Turtle wiggled his toe,
Resulting in a giggle from below.
A geyser shot up into the air,
Completely drenching the pair.

As the water began to drip,
Invisible Flea dropped her lip.
Standing Turtle had to blink,
For their home had begun to shrink.

They realized they were in motion,
And now surrounded by the ocean.
Farther and farther they seemed to drift,
Feeling the ground beneath them shift.

The pair were left in shock,
As their island began to rock.
Invisible Flea scurried up the tree.
Standing Turtle quaked at the knee.

They saw great big teeth,
As a face rose from beneath.
It was that of Treed Whale,
Who saw the two looking rather pale.

He gave an inviting smile,
Rumbling his one tree isle.
Standing Turtle felt relief.
Invisible Flea lost her grief.

They gave each other a shrug,
Deciding to trust the big lug.
They appoached Treed Whale's head,
And this is what he said:

Congratulations! You've earned a trip.
Aboard Treed Whale's ship.
Around the world we're about to skip.
So buckle in and get a good grip.

Standing Turtle and Invisible Flea,
Each quickly grabbed onto the tree.
Treed Whale picked up his pace,
Introducing each and every place.

The land of delightful sound,
Will surely amuse and astound.
The land of this and that,
Has a cat living in a hat.

Upside down monkey retreat,
Has hotdogs that can't be beat.
The haven of shameless skunk,
Is best avoided due to a smelly funk.

The tricky do-hicky region,
Has it own purple flamingo legion.
The mountains of Semamado,
House a witch that might eat you.

Past that lies merdogs reef,
They drool so our visit will be brief.
Inside Out Inn is the best,
When you need a quick rest.

The gals at whooping rock,
Sporting furry faces like to mock.
Everything goes pok-a-dot,
Here at popping painters spot.

There is the nation of forever frown.
It's said a wizard cursed the town.
Over there we have clown worm estate,
Their parties are always great.

A sky full of color resides east,
Where fireworks are constantly released.
Its sister sky to the west.
Is filled with rainbows from a magic chest.

Wavy gravy province will amuse,
As the jolting jellyfish sing the blues.
The space base is from beyond,
Ever think alien hippos would be blond?

Standing Turtle and Invisible Flea,
Found their trip was filled with glee.
But when they spied a familar sight.
Their hearts truly took flight.

Now finally we have a land,
Filled with friends willing to lend a hand.
Who show a little concern,
As they wait for your return.

Standing Turtle shed a tear,
While Invisible Flea gave a cheer.
After going to the planet's ends,
They learned home was with their friends.

I see you are ready to leave,
And have finally come to believe.
That after all you have seen.
Your grass is still well and green.

Standing Turtle swam ashore,
He let his arms really soar,
As Invisible Flea rode on his back,
Pointing to the gathering pack.

Hornless Moose and Mooing Frog,
Led the pack to the bog.
They danced and played on sight,
Well into the stary night.

Finally Treed Whale set sail,
Off to help Quick Wit Snail.
Standing Turtle and Invisible Flea,
Waved goodbye as he sang with glee.

Need to travel near or far?
Just place a wish upon a star.
For I swim from bay to bay,
And may just come your way.

So what are your feedback Face it Facts on that? Can kiddie be done by the cat? Have to imagine the lands and such though, as there is no art bones in the cat to help show. But anyway there was my go at a new children's book type post, as Mary egged on your host. Now I can't end this without any sass, so I still have to leave off with away I go with my little rhyming ass.

Enjoy your winter, smash a printer.

97 comments:

  1. This is in the league of your mentor Dr Seuss! Go Mr Hatt!

    ReplyDelete
  2. Considered starting a childrens book?

    ReplyDelete
  3. I could see it all in my mind Pat. And you took me back to my younger years when playing in my mind with fantastical worlds such as this was an every day thing. You should publish this one, Pat

    ReplyDelete
  4. I agree with Anne from the comment above. I could just picture the scenes

    ReplyDelete
  5. Truly, Pat, thanks for taking my words seriously; as I meant them seriously. And this truly COULD turn into a good children's book. I can just see the illustrations. I see that Oceangirl also thinks you have the style (and imagination) of Dr. Seuss. You could do a whole series on Standing Turtle and Invisible Flea. (After all, look how many books Seuss did using Horton.) Go, Pat!

    ReplyDelete
  6. P.S. On another humorous note, I am glad that no 'farts' worked their way into the story. Though kids probably wouldn't mind. LOL.

    ReplyDelete
  7. I loved a whale of a tale, great writing as usual Pat. Just like Anne I can visualise this very easily, awesome stuff.

    ReplyDelete
  8. Of course, your writing would be perfect for children...you have great imagination and rhyming sounds to delight the readers

    But I like these lines best though:

    A sky full of color resides east,
    Where fireworks are constantly released.
    Its sister sky to the west.
    Is filled with rainbows from a magic chest.

    ReplyDelete
  9. positively delightful and utterly charming!
    I've always wanted an invisible flea for the main character!
    Loving the last part especially:
    "Need to travel near or far?
    Just place a wish upon a star.
    For I swim from bay to bay,
    And may just come your way."

    ReplyDelete
  10. I'm in his league you say
    That surely doesn't cause dismay
    The is liked by the cat
    And even poor old Pat

    Just giving it a go
    Here at my show

    Hmmm the more I get egged on the more I just might
    Publish this one and glad you could picture each sight

    Agreeing with Anne today
    I sense a pattern I must say..haha

    Yeah I knew you meant it seriously
    So I gave it a good go at my sea
    Glad it stood the test
    Yeah Horton was a real pest
    And had quite a few
    So many I could do

    LOL yeah I decided to forgo the farts for this
    As they didn't overly add any bliss

    Glad it was nice
    Sure you'll say it twice

    Yippee I can amaze
    Thanks for the gaze

    Visualization seemed to be the key
    With the verse today at my sea

    Perfect for kiddies you say
    Geez I may have to get a visual display
    Those lines just popped in after I was through
    And I knew they had to be put in before it was due

    ReplyDelete
  11. Wow delightful and charming too
    I guess the cat impressed you
    But those penguins to same
    I hope you have them tame
    Because if they come after me
    They will have to deal with invisible flea..haha

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. ah, Cat, you forget that penguins have no fur but feathers and that bird eat insects for lunch, so your flea is doomed ;)

      Delete
    2. My poor flea
      Well it is invisible so the penguins can't see..HA

      Delete
  12. What a fun challenge Mary gave you
    Kids would love this, and adults, too!
    It's written very well
    and made me feel swell.
    Send that whale down the Ohio River
    and I'll jump on with a little shiver.
    Maybe you should wait until the summer
    If his geyser froze it would be a bummer!

    ReplyDelete
  13. Look at you strutting the diverse talents Pat.

    Well done...

    ReplyDelete
  14. Pat in the Hat? I can see it. Give him a top hat, a large patched over coat with cats peeking out from all the pockets and a gentleman's cane. He travels the world bringing rhyming stories to all the world's kids, young and old.

    ReplyDelete
  15. LOL yeah summer would be best
    As a frozen geyser might not pass the test
    Especailly if it broke
    And hit the head of some bloke
    Adults like it too
    Hmmm think that says much for ones like me and you..haha

    I have to strut them every once in a while
    As strat can just seem so vile

    LOL now that would be quite the picture indeed
    I could even do a book or little jingle to go with it for all to read..haha

    ReplyDelete
  16. And why are you trying to get my birds to say strat?
    We can't have them talking like that!
    Cursing birds would be a shame
    but it might take over Angry Birds game!
    Then I'd be rich and you'd ask for a cut
    and I'd probably give you one, cuz I'm a nut.
    hahahahaha

    ReplyDelete
  17. Great story. I could so see myself reading this to my Godson. Maybe you really should look into publishing it.

    I see the Treed Whale, invisible flea, and mooing frog all made it's way back to your blog. (For the love of God, you're turning me into a rhymer!!! I'm not even TRYING to rhyme. Contagious much? lol)

    ReplyDelete
  18. dude i have sucha hard time commenting as blogger buggers broke the machine with threaded commenting but i found a new way to fool the fools...but i digress...

    your piece is anything but a mess, i might read to my kids tonight, fantastic characters whale sized just right

    ReplyDelete
  19. Hey Pat! You're in for big time
    Discard the idea and lose the opportunity
    Big bucks are churning new designs
    For you it would just be 'in a jiffy'!

    Hank

    ReplyDelete
  20. ah - it's nice to see the world..and it's nice to come back home...and a jolting jellyfish singing the blues...i would travel far to see him..smiles

    ReplyDelete
  21. I like your new header picture!

    ReplyDelete
  22. glad it's a beaut
    And I didn't even need to toot

    LOL well swearing birds would be fun
    Maybe those parakeets can give it a run
    Then you'd have a whole flock
    And cause your neighborhood some shock
    And I would not refuse a cut
    As it beats giving it to a stratty mutt..haha

    A whale of a tale
    Came down like hail

    With more and more saying to go for it
    Maybe I will look into such a hit
    LOL better watch out with your ocd
    As in order to get rid of the contagion you might bleach yourself at your sea..LOL

    Yeah I have the same hard task commenting thanks to stupid blogger bugs
    Adding these reply addition to our rugs
    Making it a mess
    But I will also digress
    Glad it got your seal of approval too
    And fantastic characters, hmmm Drazin might come after you..lol

    The big time you say
    That would be nice then I could rhyme and play
    Big bucks too
    Damn that would surely do
    I can turn them out in a jiffy
    And make them rather spiffy

    LOL those jolting jellyfish might let you join
    All you'd need to do is drop a coin
    Then play your sax
    And send out the blues facts

    Glad you like it too
    Seems to be a hit amongst the follower crew

    Really cute
    Hmmm ruins the cat's rep as a brute..haha

    ReplyDelete
  23. This was fun and very entertaining. Glad I stopped by.

    ReplyDelete
  24. I made you glad you stopped by
    Hmmm who are you and what you do with the silver guy?..lol

    ReplyDelete
  25. Sorry, not feeling very creative lately... even when it comes to smartass comments. Saving my creativity to one or two projects really close to heart, haha!

    ReplyDelete
  26. Kiddies and cats go well together, although mine runs far from the kiddies as they often pet hard and that ruins the kitties fun. Love the names here, invisible flea and Standing Turtle, Quick Wit Snail- awesome naming job here and it has a great storytelling feel to it, perfect for little tykes. Nice job

    ReplyDelete
  27. Nice tale... and I remembered that liner which sank by Italy's shores the other day... Wonder if there were flees or cats, but children- sure!
    Great write, PAt
    Thanks so much for your weekly visits at my site
    :-)

    ReplyDelete
  28. I do not want to come across the invisible flea. I start to itch as soon as my dog begins to scratch as it is... LOL.
    Nice tale for kids Pat :)

    ReplyDelete
  29. haha well I guess you don't want to taunt
    If your creativity is no longer around to haunt

    Nice tale
    From a whale

    Yeah mine run too
    With them they want nothing to do
    The naming was fun as well
    Some of then just fell
    Right into place
    As they went on their worldly race

    Yeah that was a dumb Captain and a bet
    That made the go kaput and people fret
    Sure their were kids aboard it
    And all should take a fit

    LOL well they are hard to see as it is
    With ther scratchy bity biz

    ReplyDelete
  30. I don't know how you do it! I loved the storybook feel... now you just need the illustrations!

    ReplyDelete
  31. You tell a great tale (tail) Pat--I agree--illustrations would be great fun!

    @AudreyHowitt

    ReplyDelete
  32. Lovely...
    A sky full of color resides east,
    Where fireworks are constantly released.
    Its sister sky to the west.
    Is filled with rainbows from a magic chest.
    COOL!

    ReplyDelete
  33. i like how you conclude in such an optimistic way, that anyone can have a fantasy trip if they just make a wish

    ReplyDelete
  34. Wonderful story!

    And BTW: I love your new header.

    ReplyDelete
  35. This was a fun trip! Truly enjoyed, thanks. I also love your "Rhyme Time Theme Song" :-)

    ReplyDelete
  36. LOL! Great fun!

    And thanks as always for your delightful Limerick-Off contributions!

    ReplyDelete
  37. Love the new blog banner.:D

    And I totally see this as a kid's picture book. My kids would love it.

    ReplyDelete
  38. You seriously need to publish a children's book. I'd buy it.

    ReplyDelete
  39. So the flea was invisible
    You couldn't see his dimples.
    So small his boat was a thimble
    when scared he was a little tearful.
    Glad the turtle was able
    to befriend him, which was incredible
    and the whale was approachable
    which made the story incredible!
    :)

    ReplyDelete
  40. Dude your poems are so crazy. :)

    ReplyDelete
  41. Love your new picture
    it's what I'd I expect.
    But as for that shirt...
    were you on Star Trek?

    ReplyDelete
  42. Yep amazing sure is enough said
    But it might go to my head

    Yeah the cat could prob draw better than Pat
    But I will see what I can get to come of that

    Tail, I see what you did with that
    And yeah never know illustrations might come from my mat

    That one was cool
    Glad it was added than by this fool

    Had to be nice and optimistic for the kids
    So they can take the trip and not flip their lids

    Story and header were great you say
    My head continues to grow my way

    Glad you like the theme song my way
    As fun was had as I made it it put on display

    No problem always fun
    To have a limerick spun

    Another banner fan
    I might have to get the picture book in the can

    I guess I will have to soon
    If only I could draw a damn cartoon

    Yeah the turtle befriended him somehow
    Maybe thanks to a magic cow
    But I didn't think to much into that
    As the kids would look past that little snag at my mat
    Incredible you say
    Strat! I really do need to make the book come due at my bay

    LOL I love crazy
    It sure beats lazy

    Knew you would make that crack
    I guess that was an inside joke as the art was done for my shack

    ReplyDelete
  43. Just drop by to say I like your new header ~

    Very cozy too ~

    ReplyDelete
  44. So when you stoke up the fireplace at bush #3
    where is the end of the chimney?
    Don't tell me the smoke trails out the crack
    that would just be too much at your shack.

    ReplyDelete
  45. nice words dude, now following, check my page!

    ReplyDelete
  46. Could see this as a children's story, complete with illustrations.
    (up until your "sassy" ending, think that "ass would be offending!!)
    Another fun read, Mr. Hatt!! And again, my best to your friend, the cat! >^..^<

    ReplyDelete
  47. IMHO- I think it's a great rhyming story, but a bit long for kid's attention span. (I'm a reading specialist with years of experience with elementary aged children).

    ReplyDelete
  48. Great story, great characters, great rhymes (as always) - well done, Patt!

    ReplyDelete
  49. hey, pat! i must say this is talent. enjoyed this post so much, and it always draws me in. :) you should get published, if not already... :) btw, loving your new banner.... :) hope you're having a fab new year so far. :)
    jasmine

    ReplyDelete
  50. Wonderful story and great rhyming, but would probably be too long for kiddies.

    ReplyDelete
  51. Awesome rhymes!

    Need to travel near or far?
    Just place a wish upon a star.

    You are a true artist with your words!

    ReplyDelete
  52. Glad you like the header too
    As cozy I went for with the view

    The chimney is in behind the wall
    It didnt look good added to the hall
    So I built around it
    So the bush #3 could be a hit
    But out the crack
    There is an idea I might need to attack

    I will have a look
    At your nook

    LOL yeah I'd take the ass out
    As that would make some pout

    Hmmm that is good to know
    I could shorten up it's flow
    So it would capture their attention
    And not get them antsy and in detention

    Lots of greats
    Just my fates..haha

    I will have to look into that more
    As I hear the same encore
    Glad the new header is liked too
    Thank for the view

    Yeah that is good to know
    So I can shorten it's flow

    A true artist you say
    That makes my head grow a bit more at my bay..haha

    ReplyDelete
  53. No, I didn't mean in the header
    just at your bush in general
    lol...

    ReplyDelete
  54. Ohhhh lol well with all the header talk
    I thought you were taking that walk
    The bush gets kind of smokey
    And it would seem a tad hokey
    So in order to keep the peacock out of the loo
    That is were the fireplace is, yep it's true, nice and warm when you poo..LOL

    ReplyDelete
  55. Oh how very clever.
    Yes, at auctions I've been in those in cold weather.
    Actually cold is better than hot
    because the smell is lovely. Not.
    ha.

    ReplyDelete
  56. LOL it could bring out the smell
    But poke some hole for air conditioning and all is well

    ReplyDelete
  57. By far one of my favorites of yours. Must be that little kid inside.

    ReplyDelete
  58. Yeah think all who come here have a little kid
    Otherwise they would surely flip their lid..haha

    ReplyDelete
  59. You know good kids books make bank, right?

    ReplyDelete
  60. i LIKE THE NEW HEADER!

    (Didn't mean to put that in caps, but I do like it.)

    And, of course, the treed whale. K.

    ReplyDelete
  61. haha to each their own
    The old one was nice but set a different tone

    Yeah I was thinking that
    I may have to get to work on many by the cat

    LOL you really like it..haha
    But appreciate the added caps to your fit

    ReplyDelete
  62. I love this children's tale...it would make a marvelous book...all the drawings to illustrate it

    ReplyDelete
  63. Thanks for the feedback
    Will definintely have to look into making it a book at my shack

    ReplyDelete
  64. Pat ~ sounds like it's unanimous!
    They want this tale available!
    Illustrated and published
    as the comments continue to gush.
    Maybe add it to Patt Hatt Books.
    Something different from your book nook!

    ReplyDelete
  65. bit different from your usual style, but your rhymes are very amenable to kiddie lit. :) dig the new top image, too.

    ReplyDelete
  66. Not sure it would go there
    As it might need it's own lair
    Or maybe if I actually figure out the kindle thing
    I could give that a ring
    Will have to look into it
    As it does seem to be a hit

    Yeah not as crazy as my usual display
    But that will come most every other day
    My rhymes go to kiddie lit
    Hopefully with the kiddies they'd be a hit

    ReplyDelete
  67. This should be in a book! Loved it.love the magic you capture in so many of your stanzas! :)

    ReplyDelete
  68. You had fun with that didn't you!

    ReplyDelete
  69. Now do a children's story about free-stylin' pirates.

    ReplyDelete
  70. That sounds like an amazing mod that someone should make for Minecraft.

    ReplyDelete
  71. Rowling...move over. You write wonderfully for kids..Do a book, why don't you? Still smiling at the mooing frog. Love this, Pat!

    ReplyDelete
  72. wow!! amazing rhymes. :D you're super talented!

    ReplyDelete
  73. Pat, I liked this very much. It's got a wonderful 'feel' to it...and that cat isn't artless....LOL!

    I think I have enjoyed this one best of all! Very inventive and sucked me right in.

    Lady Nyo

    ReplyDelete
  74. I do declare, sir, this is pretty!

    ReplyDelete
  75. Its perfect... I could see how much it will be enjoyed.

    Shashi

    ॐ नमः शिवाय
    Om Namah Shivaya
    http://shadowdancingwithmind.blogspot.com/2012/01/whispers-haiku-on-how-i-write-poetry.html
    At twitter @VerseEveryDay

    ReplyDelete
  76. Glad I can capture the magic
    And it isn't tragic
    That would just be bad
    A book just may have to be done by this lad

    LOL yeah had quite a bit of fun
    As I gave it a run

    Glad talent abounds
    At my grounds

    Free stylin' pirates you say
    Hmmm don't be surprised if you see that my way

    LOL never thought of it like that
    But feel free to make the mod if you like at your mat

    hahaha I guess I will have to give it a go
    So Rowling will bow down to the cat at my show..haha

    Glad I can amaze
    As you go through my rhyming maze

    Fantasy can be fun
    Glad you liked what was done

    LOL he's artless when it comes to drawing stuff
    A paw print is ever so rough
    Enjoyed it best you say
    Hmmm I guess I really will consider a book display

    Do declare it pretty
    So nice, and with no pity

    Glad you could see
    I'll have to make it be

    ReplyDelete
  77. Pat

    Once again, a rousing trip;
    I'm glad the travelers didn't slip
    before they found their way back home
    and saw they didn't need to roam.

    ReplyDelete
  78. Yep always think the grass is green
    Until you come upon the scene
    Then know it is not
    And you like what you had a lot

    ReplyDelete
  79. I'll draw your book, no need to look
    for markers you don't need.
    I'll color and draw, we'll have a ball
    and start to grow this seed.
    Then we'll print, and spend some sense
    on marketing and acts
    I'll bring to you when the drawings through
    and you can put it on faceitfacts :)

    ReplyDelete
  80. Interesting idea you proposed in rhyme
    Sounds nice and sublime
    Could help the idea grow
    But then how would that go
    Who knows what will ensue
    Surely some thinking is due

    ReplyDelete
  81. You really do need to turn this into a book! With the right illustrations it could be extraordinary. Here's my favorite part:
    "While Invisible Flea gave a cheer.
    After going to the planet's ends,
    They learned home was with their friends."

    My girls didn't get to read this yet, but I'll have them read it tonight. I know they're going to love it :0)

    ReplyDelete
  82. Thanks a lot for the feedback
    It surely did not lack
    Just need to illustrate it now I guess
    Particularly not by Pat and his art mess..haha

    ReplyDelete
  83. Hey, Pat! It's been awhile. I love the new look, and it sounds like you've struck a chord with this one, right? So get busy!

    :)

    ReplyDelete
  84. haha yeah been a while indeed
    Since you were at my feed
    Getting busy I am too
    That sounded bad but what do you do

    ReplyDelete