Friday, January 27, 2012

Once No Longer Sucking Their Thumb How Can One Be This Dumb?

Sadly Flappy has come back, once again making me rant at my shack. I must reiterate the title because brains cells truly are vital. But Flappy seems to have none or at least is missing a ton. For after aging so you no longer suck your thumb, how can anyone be this dumb? Okay, I know some people still suck there thumb at a ripe old age but that's nasty so we'll just ignore that and turn the page.

"Do you have a VCR here? I want to play a DVD?"

Does anyone else see the stupidity there? Well just in case you don't as you sit and stare, I will help you out with a descriptive shout.

VCR = Videocassette Recorder
DVD = Digital Video(or now Versatile) Disc

Now they have a "Video" in common I guess, so maybe that's why her brain is in such a mess. But does cassette and disc match? Maybe if you go off to la la land and down that Lost hatch. So I kept my remark to myself and tried not to treat her like a dumb know nothing elf.

"You mean a DVD player, right?"

"No! I need a VCR to play my DVD."

"VCRs never have and never will play DVDs."

She looked at me like I was crazy and my mind was the one that was hazy. Yeah, I know I'm nuts most of the time but me screwing up the difference would be a crime. Before I could even say a word she kept going thinking I was absurd.

"The other place we used to go had a VCR that played DVDs."

She talks about that other place so damn much, I wish she'd get back in touch and leave me the hell alone. I'd so like to whack some sense into her with the phone.

"Well unless it is a combo you are referring to, no they didn't."

"No! It was just a VCR that played DVDs."

I wonder what she thinks plays mp3s, a record player? This was just taking stupid to a whole new layer. Obviously Flappy had played a DVD before, as she had one holding it with her stupid ass encore. So unless she is blind or has her head well and tight up someones behind, she should know what the hell plays the thing. For DVD player is right on the side, front, etc. of each player giving it a ring.

"Either way we don't have a VCR here."

"Why not? Everyone should have a VCR."

"Because VCRs are resting comfortably with eight track players."

Her eyes widened and she batted her eyelash, not expecting that from our clash. Plus there is a VCR at work with a TV, but no way in hell was I digging that out for stupid Flappy.

"Well what do people use when they come here?"

"A laptop. Those things have great VCRs in them. They play DVDs so well."

"I'll have to see if one of the others has a laptop they can bring."

And off she went back to the room with me wanting to clock her with a broom. The moron didn't even get my laptop crack, thinking they have a VCR in them to play that DVD for her crazy ass pack. All I know is I need to win the lottery and get the hell out of here, for Flappy surely strikes fear. No idea how anyone can listen to her sass as ten seconds is more than enough for my little rhyming ass.

Enjoy your winter, smash a printer.

62 comments:

  1. Oh geez, this actually happened? >.<

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  2. That sort of dumbness could be contagious...

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  3. A VCR was vogue at one time
    But they're no longer in use sadly
    A laptop a nickel a dime
    Making popular rounds presently

    Hank

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  4. i would call it 'diversity' ... haha ... good for you that you didn't clock her with a broom ;-) my son still sucks his thumb sometimes but you made me realize that he knows the difference :-)

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  5. This makes eugenics look like a good idea.Unfortunately statistics show that stupid people breed in greater numbers than non-stupid people. Surely there's an antidote somewhere.

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  6. Dear Pat saw the the video, they are cute!! sorry for say they were virtual pets:))

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  7. By "The other place we used to go had a VCR that played DVDs," I was ready to run her over with my car. By "No! It was just a VCR that played DVDs," I still wanted to do that, but even more so!

    My favorite line was "Because VCRs are resting comfortably with eight track players." As someone old enough to remember both, I loved it.

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  8. you mean VCRs don't play DVDs???? :)))))

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  9. I think you should try to be nicer to poor, misguided Flappy. Maybe you should buy her a DVD Rewinder for her birthday?

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  10. I can't believe somebody could be as dim as that I mean come on, there is quite the difference like you point out Pat.

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  11. LOL I could imagine Flappy coming along and you sitting there saying to yourself..."Go ahead, call it a VCR one more time and I'm gonna rhyme all bout this tomorrow!!" Her ears must be rinnggingg!!!

    You're too funny! Clearly she's not technologically saavy. But I did Eep at your Lost reference. I would loveee to spend some time in that hatch!! And by some time I mean like 2 hours. lol :)

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  12. This made me a little crazy, thinking about someone who thought there was EVER a VCR that played DVDS! Yikes.....

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  13. What a stupid lady! Holy Moley! Pat you have great restraint! If it was me I'd have told her where to stick that tape!

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  14. Man. We still pull tapes out of the back of the closet and the little kids look like at me like I would at someone driving a model T. I am feeling old now.

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  15. haha yep sad but true
    With Flappy such stupidity often comes due

    LOL so telling me to steer clear?
    That dumbness is so low though I have no fear

    Yep, now they are no more
    Think most would get that at their shore
    A nicel and dime for now
    Until the next big wow

    LOL diversity I guess
    Still she is sooo dumb I must confess
    haha well at least he know the difference between the two
    Until this 50+ year old who yaps even when she turns blue

    hahaha yeah eugenics would surely win
    If they had her for a model at their bin
    Those statistics are correct as well
    No wonder the world is going to hell

    Frusting indeed
    Just another day at the work feed

    haha well at least you know
    Nothing is virtual now at my show

    So you say
    With your great comment display

    LOL I wish you would run her over well and good
    But she's as dumb as a stick of wood
    So would probably bounce off and walk away
    And live to flap another day
    Eight tracks I've and used way back when
    As in the basement we had at least ten

    Dez that is just sad
    I think those penguins beat you one to many time at your pad

    LOL that be the perfect thing for her to receive
    Except she'd prob take it and leave
    Expecting it to work
    Like some added perk

    Yeah BIG difference between the two
    And if you use them should know now with just a view

    LOL yep, first thought I had was it be a post
    At least I'd get something out of being her host
    Wished she'd take the hint and fly they hell away
    But oh no has to keep coming back my way
    hahaha yeah Lost popped into my head as I went along
    And better watch out things could go wrong
    You could press that button for years
    As it worked on your ocd fears

    haha indeed
    Maybe she'll read that and take heed

    hahaha yeah made me a lot crazy that she thought she was right
    Even at the end of the night

    LOL I sooo wanted to tell her where to stick it
    But then I'd get fired from my work pit
    Can't afford that
    So I restrained myself, maybe I should go drop a pringle can of cat poo on her door mat..lol

    LOL well they aren't that old
    Ten years ago they were still sorta bold

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  16. I remember when all we had were film strips. I used to watch the same star wars and old spider man ones we had all the time. You kids and your veedeos and DCRs...GET OFF MY LAWN!

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  17. LOL can't say I remember any of that
    So I won't be a mean cat
    And stay off your lawn
    At least when it turns to dawn
    And you can see
    Little old me

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  18. LOL!! Well now you know all about my button OCD. I would just keep pushing. Plus, idk why that irritated Jack so much. It's not like they had anything else to do while stranded on the dam island and they had enough people to man it. Did they ever explain how the button came to be other than the dharma crap?? I don't think soo...

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  19. Poor thing. I would've shown her pictures of a vcr and dvd.

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  20. our VCR/DVD combo went kaput a few months ago, so no mote tapes for us to gape at cat, but this dames a few dimes shy of a dollar, least you made flappy happy as she went away snappy, at least until she figures it out...

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  21. haha yes now I know the button ocd
    So you would be in charge of hitting the thing while everyone else went and played in the sea
    Yeah it was just for the dharma crap
    So the power wave thingy would stay in check with each button lap
    Never explained why though
    Just as they didn't with much on that show

    LOL didn't have a picture on hand
    That would have been grand

    Yeah mine went kaput too
    But it is still set up to view
    Because I use the clock on it
    Flappy being happy could be better than making her have a fit

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  22. i think she meant betamax, that's the ticket

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  23. LOL wouldn't surprise me one bit
    But if she thought that she'd be more of a twit

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  24. That's fine by me. I don't swim in the ocean. It's the litter box to millions of sea creatures. I'm not tryin to get e-coli ;)

    Yes, they did rush the ending a lot. I have sooo many questions left about that show. Oh well...

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  25. haha...as if it weren't confusing enough... we have all kind of mysterious things combined...tv...whatever players...game station...and some days ago, i just wanted to switch off the tv cause everyone left the room and ... don't laugh...i had no idea how to switch it off...so i tried all three remote controls that were lying around and things switched off and on and whatever, something was recording...and i felt like someone from the past, just arrived in the 21st century...ugh...

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  26. Oh, I knew this story would be great
    but it surpassed all expectations at any rate!
    I laughed OUT loud and got tears in my eyes
    the parakeets even looked surprised.
    I'm sure as the story did unfold
    you knew a post must be told.
    I'm glad Flappy comes in at times
    so you can entertain us with her chimes.

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  27. Yeah not a big fan of going into the ocean
    As sharks can move with the motion
    And attack
    Having you for a snack..haha
    The ending was complete trash
    One big cop out I'd like to bash
    Completely ignored the island part of it
    And who will survive which they'd played on quite a bit
    Meant nothing at all
    Because they were all in some death hall
    Whoopdi friggin doo
    Crap, the ending that came due

    hahahaha well yeah can pretend you are a time traveller
    Or a remote unraveller
    But I'm sure you can tell a round disc doesn't go into a square hole
    That just isn't it's goal

    Some people indeed
    Make my ears bleed

    LOL glad I could help keep the parakeets on their toes
    As Flappy is crazy, what goes through her head God only knows
    Yeah I knew as soon as she said dvd into vcr
    That this would have to be told at my bar
    That is all she is good for
    I still rather wish she'd leave my shore..haha

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  28. I'm a crazy loon
    So don't wish too hard you might turn into a cartoon..haha

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  29. Wow, some people can really be hard to deal with I guess.. That's customer service for ya though.

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  30. Kate, Sawyer, and Lipidis survived...or did I not understand the ending. hahaha I thought they got away on the plane. They all ended up in the deaht hall at different times. What I want to know is WHY did Ben Linus has to wait to cross over?!

    Maybe you need to do a post on this. lol

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  31. She sounds really dense. A little dry for us gents.

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  32. Aww, poor old flappy. Really though some people are just plain and simply clueless. I try not to judge or label someone so quickly but I would go nuts having to deal with her. You should have brought the VCR out and then watched in delight as old flappy tried to play her DVD in that antique. Wait until DVD's go out the door as Blu-Rays are now taking up much more of the floor and then she'll ask for a flashlight that gives off blue light or something inane as that. People, sigh.

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  33. She doesn't sound too bright, great for a laugh though.

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  34. hilarious, pat! your blog is the only one i call my hubby over to read... great way to start my weekend. enjoy yours, too!

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  35. Yeah so true
    Customer service at it's finest at my work loo

    Yeah they survived but it was a pointless survival because all poof, it just went to them all dead
    So who cares that they sruvived as they still lost their head
    Different times was just a cop out
    To try and get all them together againt for one final shout
    He wasn't ready to cross over yet
    I guess but then prob not a safe bet
    A post on lost and I'd get lost
    Might not be worth the cost..haha

    haha I never had one
    Not that old though I could make one run

    Yep dense indeed
    And will make your ears bleed

    LOL yeah blu-ray would just confuse her even more
    Although I won't buy those until I absolutely have to at my shore
    I should have brought it out to let her try to play the dvd
    But would have been a pain to get out at my work sea
    And she isn't worth that
    So says Pat

    hahaha yeah a laugh later on
    As not a bright thought seems to dawn

    Glad it is fun to read and starts your weeked grand
    Should be fine, yet snowy, here in rhyme time land

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  36. VCR's are mega old I'm sure I have one laying around somewhere! I jumped on bluray when that came out in 2006, glad its not 50 freaking bucks for a movie now though.

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  37. Heheh - what a delightful exchange.

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  38. Yeah blu ray was highly over priced when they came out
    Only reason I refuse to give them a shout
    Is my ocd
    For they looks dumb next to the dvd
    Big case, small case
    Stupid and out of place..lol

    Delightful now maybe
    Not at the time at my work sea

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  39. Must have been really annoying/frustrating to deal with!

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  40. hahaha to say the least
    Flappy is a flapping beast

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  41. Oh wow. Talk about technologically impaired. :|

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  42. hahaha yep she sure wins first prize
    And her stupidness would prob make her think she was oh so wise

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  43. Glad it's great
    Just my fate

    LOL still before my time
    But I bet it went to the max which isn't a crime

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  44. Ah, technology. Ain't it grand? I've got three different formats in my house and movies on all three.

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  45. Poor Flappy has no idea
    she has earned her own category galleria
    here at your blog
    where you rhyme through the fog.
    From storage space
    to rubber stamps in her face,
    VCR players
    and rubber bands. You want to replace her!
    But we would really miss these posts
    written by you the host.

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  46. haha at least you know they are different ones
    And your mouth doesn't get the runs...haha

    Glad you think it is funny
    Her mouth is some runny

    hahaha yeah I guess she has become a staple
    Speaking of which whether steel or maple
    I'd like to staple her mouth shut
    Then she'd prob start talking out her butt
    At least Drazin is well kinda fake
    This all the more crazy for she is real and takes the cake..haha

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  47. At least she isn't there every day,
    sitting one desk over at your work space.
    You would pop a vein!
    Go insane.
    Pull out your hair,
    run to your lair.
    Scream "AUUUUGGGH"
    Ask for a sick day off.
    Wish for Ms Nostril
    or a trip to the hospital.
    lol....

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  48. LOL all but that last one
    As ocd would win out, so I'd just run
    Stay far away from that germy place
    And yeah if every day I had to see Flappy's face
    I'd be loooong gone
    Find a whole new work lawn

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  49. I guess by now you'll need that well-deserved break. Speaking of which, Lil Dreamer has a message for you. She opted for Pearl Beach and then she said something about your cat.... Now where's my VCR? I need to watch an mp3...

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  50. Yes I need that well deserved break
    Especially after I skip the country for drowning Flappy in some lake..haha

    Haha not a fun time indeed
    But then makes for fun at times at my feed

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