Wednesday, March 28, 2012

Island of The Gawker Part Five. How Will We Ever Survive?

The ground kept drawing closer and I closed my eyes having my fill, suspecting we would be nothing but the equivalent of roadkill. Then something shocked us just enough to send a tingle up our spine and make Drazin huff. The ground was no more than ten feet away and we felt something at play. We became nose to nose with the ground and then sprung back up into the air avoiding becoming a smudge under a dirt mound.

"Now what? Invisible fairies?

"Drazin hopes not or Drazin will have to squash them too."

"Just like you squashed The Gawker huh oh godly one."

Pat was as normal as could be as we all bounced a bit before settling between a rock and a tree. It was like we were sitting in thin air and then out came an old guy who raised my neck hair. He was followed by three more white robed guys and they all thought they were so wise. A pack of cavemen looking people followed behind and they were really out of their mind.

"Drazin isn't sure if they are fairies but they appeared out of nowhere, so Drazin knows this can't be good."

"What was your first clue? Them going all Memoirs of an Invisible Man?"

"Oh godly one who came down from the sun. We knew the day would come when you would grace us with your presence here, so we waited and gathered near."

"Did those nuts just rhyme too? We are in the damn Twilight Zone of rhyme."

"Drazin is glad somebody finally knows of Drazin's godly stature."

It seems we were in a net that these guys set up to catch this pet. For they cut us down and if we thought Blabber was from crazy town, these guys were from mars and then they had to go and hum a few bars. The look on Drazin's face I will never forget, as this surely made him fret. Miss Priss and Pat just rolled their eyes, as these people surrounded me like flies.

Penwassa here to do your bidding,
And no we aren't kidding.
You will show us the path,
To avoid his wrath.
Taking us all to that golden gate,
For such is your fate.

My zen has seen it come to pass,
Dear godly little rhyming ass.
You will save us all,
And take us to His holy hall.

I was once in a daze,
And saw through the haze.
It made everyday amazing,
Finding the sweet lust from his gazing.

I keep the evil away,
As it tries its best to get us each day.
Max Evil can exist inside me,
As I save the others with glee.

You will rise us above,
Showing us the path to His love.
We are devote to you,
And know it to be true.

"Great! Not only have we got the godly one to deal with, some glowy eyed freaks, George of the Jungle and his apes and a guy with a bad haircut and a huge eyeball coming out of his head. But now we got a cult. This island just keeps betting better and better."

"Drazin likes you better with the voices in your head. You whine too much. But Drazin is sure they are just confused. For Drazin is the god not the fleabag."

They grabbed me and the other three, whisking us through a wall and on the other side was a great hall. I surmised that had an invisible force field of some sort. And why not? Everything else was crazy at this island court. In we went and found ourselves in some old Little House on the Prairie type town. Pat was just waiting for them to say "Goodnight John Boy" so he could whack them down. We all knew we had to flee for once they learned of me, finding I'm only a cat, these cult guys surely would not like that. I have seen enough movies to know that it never ends well for the god and usually some sacrifice decides to show.

And just as that thought crossed my mind. There was Besercules tied to a shrine of some kind. He was gagged so we did not have to listen to him yap, which was nice of that Penwassa chap. Although I think these guys take throne a little too literally around here for when we drew near to his pedestal of shine, he sat down on a sparkling toilet actually all divine. Yep, his throne was the loo, what it was really for they never knew. The other three had smaller ones of their own and sat down in front of him taking a more sensible tone.

They explained how when the four sacrifices were in place through my rhyming pace, I would ascend them into the heavens above and let them feel His love. Drazin, Pat and Miss Priss immediately assumed they were the other three and got ready to flee. But then we heard language I care not to repeat and out came Irish Air refusing defeat. She kicked and screamed at the cavemen like weirdos tying her to the shrine and kept mumbling as they gagged her with a vine.

"Drazin thinks the Blabber runt and Petsy better watch their back."

"He's right for a change. Unless there are more bibbity bobbity boo people on this island, their next."

"You humans and your stupid theories, cults. Geesh."

Miss Priss trotted off behind a hut trying to make a plan to get us out of this rut. I could not move without being swarmed by these cavemen loony tunes. As they kept ranting about full moons and how it would be soon time for me to let loose my powers of rhyme. They even swooned over Drazin and Pat, who of course tried to avoid then getting their germs over him, especially after seeing them eat rat. Drazin lapped it up a bit but even that nitwit knew this was bad and we had to make a break for it from this Cult pad.

Pat dodged their germy mitts and grabbed me by the tail, telling Miss Priss it was time to hit the trail. Drazin ranted as they gave chase and punched a couple in the face. We got to the wall where we came in and tried to dash through but sadly it was not a win. As we bounced off the wall and landed in the dirt of the hall. We looked up to find the cult standing over us and Drazin let out a cuss, as they dragged us back to their town and locked us down. Jailed we were and all I could do was lick my fur.

********************
So out of The Gawker's gaze and into some cult craze. This island was such a pain. What next? Some black smoke monster swooping over us like rain? Now we have to get out of jail and figure out how to set sail, while avoiding these caveman loony tunes. If you'll excuse me, I think I ate some bad prunes. Meaning no more of my sass until part six of this tale starring my little rhyming ass.

Experience spring, have a fling.

119 comments:

  1. Loving this instalment of Island of the Gawker man, can't wait to read what happens next in part six.

    By the way, when I refreshed my dashboard it says this was posted just 19 seconds ago. I don't know if it's huge but it brightened up the Matthew show.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. haha yeah sometimes the dashboard is slower to show
      A new post from each show
      It takes a few minutes usually
      So one could already be done reading at my sea

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  2. Invisible fairies? Humans and their cult. I am loving this series.

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    Replies
    1. Glad you love the Gawker
      Even if he is a bit of a stalker

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  3. Replies
    1. So nice it messed him up
      With a slight hiccup

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  4. Replies
    1. So nice it gave him a thrill
      And he had to fix it at my hill

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  5. This is such a hilarious series! Love that the throne was the loo! The mental images I can create from your rhymes are hilarious Pat!

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    Replies
    1. hahaha well Penwassa does have a loo throne
      So I used that when I threw him a bone
      Glad the images work too
      Although not sure all are good to view..haha

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  6. This is going off the scale with islands and invisible fairies, people may wail!

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    Replies
    1. Bah let them wail
      As the craziness will keep dropping like hail

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  7. Why do I have this strange feeling that some other people around here might want to see me gagged?

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    Replies
    1. who, who, who? Tell us and the penguins will eat them alive!

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    2. Aw..Anne, I think it's so sweet that Dez thinks he's your body guard. Not that you need one, but still... :)

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    3. Bah no one around here wants to see such a thing
      Except for maybe those cult guys and their loo king..haha

      Dez is going on the defensive too
      Maybe he wanted to be king of the loo

      Don't get too sweet
      Or I'll have to bring back zombie feet

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    4. Dez is my protector and my cohort in the Irish/Serbian Gossip Alliance. We've just been recognized by the U.N. as global security risk.

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    5. Yeah bath them in alcohol when they come near
      That would surely cause them fear

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    6. Please don't bring back zombie feet Pat, please, never, never, never.

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    7. haha I suppose just for you
      I will keep them from view

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    8. yes, do keep them from view
      and I suppose I should thank you
      for not using their photo on mr. linky
      so I'd have to look at them all icky
      on my own blog post
      that would be bad to do to the host.
      lol.

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    9. yep, the UN has proclaimed us as global security risk, but fear not, Betsy, we are dangerous only for feline offenders :)
      And Betsy is right, if Pat the naughty Cat put those zombie feet in my blogroll I'd really have to consider hurting him physically...

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    10. LOL yes I thought about doing that
      But then I might scare people away from your mat
      So I was nice
      And didn't make your readers pay the zombie foot price..haha

      hahaha yeah have to find the cat and Pat first
      To do such a burst

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  8. this Gwaker series is getting more hilarious with every post :D

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    Replies
    1. haha it is just fun for the host
      So it does get much more fun with each boast

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  9. Replies
    1. And so it does indeed
      Here at my feed

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  10. "all I could do was lick my fur"
    so I guess you don't mind finding a hair in your soup?

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    Replies
    1. cat would probably eat the hair and leave the coup.

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    2. soup...soup, not coup. lol...

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    3. Betsy, do you have a hair in your mouth?

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    4. Nope the cat doesn't mind at all
      Finding such a thing at his hall

      He'd never leave the coup
      But yes to the soup
      As chickens could be in the other one
      And the cat would chase down a ton

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    5. LOL at Betsy and Anne.
      And yuck to the Cat. If I ever ate any chicken I would hear the sad screams of their carcases in my tummy later on :((( and my stomach would be the graveyard for dead birds :(

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    6. Hmmm Pat's stomach must be quite the graveyard then at his sea
      For chicken is basically all he eats with glee..haha

      Betsy never said no either to Anne
      Maybe she just has hair in her frying pan

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    7. I'm sure with 9 cats here
      I've ingested a few here and there
      not on purpose though
      not sauteed and wrapped in dough
      or anything that sounds neat
      for it wouldn't be a treat.
      ha

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    8. Yeah I more than likely have too
      As Orlin likes to share a few
      And Cassie spreads them around a bit more
      But still not a ton at my shore
      Unlike that other place
      And your space..haha

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    9. so basically both of you cough fur balls from time to time? That must be fun, does Pat play with your fur ball when you cough it out, Betsy? :PPPP

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    10. Pat just cleaned up three in the past few days at his place
      Miss Priss sure has them at a steady pace
      Out comes the Lysol as soon as they are found
      And away go each hairball mound

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  11. I'm glad I wasn't included as a sacrifice. :P

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    Replies
    1. Oh you never know
      What will come forth at my show

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  12. nice,nice and fun history Pat;)))
    always think if you mention me what you will tell!!!
    lol, have a nice day xx

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    Replies
    1. careful what you wish for, Gloriacita,
      who knows what kind of plot the Cat might make for you :)

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    2. LOL yes who know indeed what could come
      From my little rhyming bum
      Gloria could be a fish
      Giving the cat a tasty dish..haha

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    3. Only I think Dez and Pat only when I read is fun Lol anyway the cat in the past said some thing of me, dont matter:))He knows I love him xxxx

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    4. haha oh you will come to be
      In the island of the Gawker for all to see
      Maybe part eight or so
      When you and a few others tend to show

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    5. OK anyway I read you always cat/Pat :))

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    6. That is clear
      As you come even with zombie feet shown by my little rhyming rear..haha

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    7. LOL she could be a fish giving you a tasty dish :)))
      Can I be a bear giving you a kick in the rear? :)

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    8. hahaha all animals have to go through Petsy though
      So you will have to ask her politely at her underground show

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    9. I just wear so many hats, don't I?
      I don't forget that I pack heat
      not afraid to use it on my beat.
      lol.

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    10. Just aim for the less important parts of Pat
      You have surely scared away the cat
      Known as the kitty killer now
      I heard it from a mad cow

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    11. I scared away Orlin?
      Aw, Orlin...say it isn't so, darlin.

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    12. haha he'll come back when a pellet proof vest is found
      And a helmet that looks profound...hahahaha

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  13. Ohh, this just keeps getting better and better!! If they were able to catch the tough Irish Anne, than Petsy and Blabber are screwed! hahaha I cracked up at the goodnight Johnboy. Are you investing in a Walton's pot as well?? lol!!! hahahaha Please, no smoke monsters!! Unless if you're going to bring a John Locke about to tame the damn thing...LOL!!!

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    Replies
    1. hahahaha Petsy and Blabber may join up with the others soon
      As in sets the full moon
      But then the cat may save the day
      If he can get out of his jailed bay
      hahahaha nope no Walton's pot for me
      Although just maybe
      The cult will cook the sacrifices in one
      Before it is all done..haha
      Old smokey prob will not show
      As something else will come from above or below..haha

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    2. LOL Poor, poor Blabber and Petsy!!! Maybe they will join together and fight. With Blabber's tarsier and Pety's zoo a stampede can stop that silly cult! hahahahaha

      Please do not make Blabber's demise be in a Walton's pot. Put Braveheart on in the background, and you found my worst fear! LOL!!!!!

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    3. LMAO remember before you said that part six and seven have already been written at my sea
      I think today your psychic powers may be invading bush number three..haha
      For it could go something like that
      Of course it also involves a cat

      hahahaha the cult will get their Braveheart accents ready to go
      And start cheering in the background as the pot gets pulled out for show..haha

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    4. I HATE braveheart. Such a dumb, silly movie!!!!!!!!! I wonder is Mel Gibson knew that his movie would torture me. As for the Walton pot...it's a prized posession. It's never been actually used. You may want to watch out for the wrath of using it took cook a poor Blabber and Petsy!

      LMAO Aw, I'm psychic am I?! lol

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    5. hahaha Gibson was probably too busy getting drunk and mouthing off at the world to know
      That you would get bothered more and more each time Braveheart began to show..haha
      I suppose I should forgo the wrath
      And go down the replica path
      Be safer for all
      If of course we ever get out of the Gawker's scary hall

      Well you were close to what may come
      From my little rhyming bum
      So a psychic you could be
      Or just once more have the rhyming cat in the head of thee

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    6. I just want to know this, too...
      why do we come out with the full moon?
      Don't werewolves do that
      you silly cat?
      Oh we could cause a stampede for sure
      and beat anything your imagination can conjure.

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    7. Want to put that to the test?
      For my imagination is above most of the rest
      I'm sure I can come up with something you never thought you would do
      Here at my zoo..haha
      And the full moon is when off with their heads will come
      I may have gotten ahead of myself with that little hum..haha

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    8. haha...letting out spoilers now are you
      how many more chapters will come due?

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    9. Betsy...I believe we were just challenged to an imagination-off! I say, game on!!!! hahaha

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    10. On chapter eight now
      I'm sure no more then ten will take a bow

      LOL bring it on!
      The cat can take all at his lawn

      Delete
  14. Replies
    1. Glad I could give a few
      As this tale came due

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  15. dude...bed prunes will jack you up, there will be no back up on that freeway, but another great spin today...now how will you get out of jail, i am sure you will so you can continue this fabulous romp...guess i will will just sit here and wait on the stump

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    Replies
    1. hahaha I suppose that would surely be the case
      Not sure I need them though at my place..haha
      Too bad The Gawker wouldn't post bail
      That could get us out of jail
      But there is another way or ten
      To get us away from this cult scary women and men

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    2. bed prunes? now that was a funny typo!

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    3. LOL bed or bad
      Still a tooting time would be had

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  16. Invisible faeries? Are they part of the tooth fairy cult? Now I know where my kids' teeth go - to the Island of the Gawker!

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    Replies
    1. Yeah all the teeth are collected there
      To get the Gawker released from his island lair

      Delete
  17. I am guessing the tv does not get turned on at your place often with all the adventure going on there.

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    Replies
    1. The tv is one quite a bit for Pat
      But not for such an adventurous cat

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  18. What a tail . . . er, tale!

    "Twilight Zone of rhyme" rofl

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. hahaha that is what it seemed to be
      At least the me..haha

      Delete
  19. A loo for a throne
    Somewhat least known
    The Cat licking furs
    An every day bother
    Switch on with the TV
    Is with the Cat's envy
    Gawker not putting up bail
    Risks the stay in jail
    Not quite without a frown
    Things going round and round!

    Hank

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yep round and round they still go
      Here at my show
      With the gawker upon high
      And some sacrifices looking to die

      Delete
  20. Invisible fairies are now the fame

    I wish I couldn't see or hear the fairies from the N64 Zelda game.

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    Replies
    1. haha yeah that would be grand
      If they came to my land

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  21. Deep within,
    behind my skin,
    lurks creativity trying to win.
    Its not something that you can see,
    but will triumph one day eventually.

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    Replies
    1. And I hope it does
      Just because
      Rhyming is fun to see
      And can cause such glee

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  22. like the new twists here in this episode. I'm sure I missed a few, but I like the hidden references you included here, zen, everyday amazing, two blogs I follow. Then the tv talk was loud and proud, from george of the jungle to Looney tunes, but the Walton's reference was superb. Great continuation of the gawker tale.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yep the tv talk always has to come
      Either out Pat or the cat's bum
      John Boy popped in
      And just asked for a spin
      And using others too
      Is such fun to do

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  23. That is quite an epic episode. I don't know how you do it. Amazing and funny, as usual.

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    Replies
    1. I just go about each day
      And let the rhyme have it say
      Epic is nice the hear
      As the Gawker causes such fear

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  24. Oh, my dear, dear, Pat...please tell me you're not picking on my beloved Anne....you my need to protect her from all harm

    =)

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    Replies
    1. Anne has her protection, read her comment above :)

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    2. My bad, Dez, I see you are taking good care of Anne =)

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    3. Anne will surely come through
      As the next installments come due
      Plus as you can see
      She does have Dez the cough stalker cough protecting her with glee

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    4. The penguin man and me are a package deal, hurt one and the other will squeel.

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    5. not the other one, but the cat will squeel :)

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    6. The cat might at the sound
      For I'm sure you squeeling would make him stick his head in the ground..haha

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    7. oh, please, if you like the mating sounds of the cats in spring, you will survive some penguin squeeling too :)

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    8. The cat doesn't like those either for he is snip snip
      So can't even get a good grip

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  25. Haha, nice Walton's reference. Funny and twisted.

    Shannon at The Warrior Muse, co-host of the 2012 #atozchallenge! Twitter: @AprilA2Z

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    Replies
    1. Funny and twisted I usually am at bush number three
      And never fear all posts are done for a to z

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  26. drazin is the man
    the path to his love will make our faces tan
    this was an action-packed episode
    and now i am officially in rhyming mode

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    Replies
    1. haha Drazin surely thinks he is the man
      Liking all who is a fan
      And after that
      You would surprise the cat
      If you were not in rhyming mode
      For that was a bit of rhyme overload

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  27. I'm stopping by to say hello before the A-Z challenge begins. I'm a new follower here :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hello to you as well
      Will hop on over to your cell

      Delete
  28. Me gusta Pat Hatt's historias de amor

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    Replies
    1. Me will nod and agree
      Here at bush number three

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    2. I love your stories to Pat, even if I do wind up gagged and tied to a sacrificial altar in them.

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    3. hahahahaha oh never fear
      You will be prob be saved by my little rhyming rear

      Delete
  29. Hubby has an appointment with a new neurosurgeon tomorrow so I may not be able to drop in.

    Thanks to you and Jax for coming over to play at my bay today while I was away.

    It was nice coming in and finding you all having fun. Now go to sleep!!!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Drop in when you can at my sea
      As have to take care of the hubby
      Blabber and I will come to play
      As the cat likes causing her dismay..haha
      Fun was surely had
      And hahaha I did just go to sleep when you typed this too at my pad

      Delete
    2. tell hubs to be nice to the neurosurgeon, dahling, and you be nice to those hunky male nurses, you naughty you :)

      Delete
    3. What he said
      Don't cause them dread
      Unless they do it first
      Then let lose a burst

      Delete
  30. reading your post, i was inspired to rhyme,
    but i found i was spending too much time,
    So i said, screw it, imma just tell pat that he rocks,
    because that doesn't take too much time of my clocks.

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    Replies
    1. Telling me I rock is fine by me
      And you still rhymed for all to see
      And glad I can inspire to rhyme
      That is surely not a crime

      Delete
  31. How do you think of all these rhymes?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. They just pop out of me
      So they will keep on coming until otherwise at my sea

      Delete
  32. Gosh, I love those sparkly loos... where can you buy them Oh Godly one, or two or three? ;)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. They can be found at Loos R Us
      You have to buy three or they kick up a fuss

      Delete