The tarsier perked up his ears and after a few seconds relieved all our fears, as Miss Priss and I heard it too. The glowy eyed freaks did not have a clue. Drazin dusted himself off and continued to grunt, trying to act big and brave as he did not like being saved by a runt. Pat seemed normal once more, as the bunker sparkled and was so clean you could eat off the floor. Miss Priss was still delighted over Blabber saving us and I was glad that tarsier was not like Tarsier Man and on the short bus. Although the bug eyed thing ran around me and I chased it up its little fake tree. What did it expect a cat to do? Never fear, no eating came due I just gave him a mew and turned as Drazin's yap let his name once more ensue.
"Drazin could have held Drazin's own."
"Right, godly one. Just like how you did when they buried you in the big beach litter box."
"Drazin can still take you fleabag."
"Keep dreaming godly mook. So how did you get here?"
"Yeah, what's with the radio and the shampoo?"
"Better yet, flea on the knee, Drazin has to hear that one."
Blabber seemed a tad overwhelmed by their questioning of her and bent down brushing my fur. I guess she liked that I kept my mouth shut and I appreciated the safety of her underground hut. I suppose being here this long with only yourself to talk too might make one go loony tunes, it's sad but true. In this case I was not sure though and then Blabber caught me off guard as she began to blow. She grabbed a handful of what looked like dust and blew it on me with one quick gust. I sneezed and felt really weird and then in my brain the answers appeared. Magic dust, I guess it beats rust. That was not the end of it though for I started rhyming out the answers like I was at my rhyming show.
On a typical New York day,
Blabber went to her work bay.
It seems some evil Japanese,
Were tired of her collecting fees.
So they wished fleas on her knees.
Looking to do a bit more than tease.
It wasn't divine,
But she was still fine.
Until the shampoo
It turns out using shampoo times two
Coupled with a magic flea,
Brought her across the sea.
A flea on the knee,
A knee with a flea.
Took her across the sea,
At least it wasn't on me.
Blabber appeared before The Gawker,
Thinking he was another creepy stalker.
But that soon turned to concern,
As she felt his gawker burn.
"So a magic flea brought this Blabbermouth here? Drazin has heard some stories but that takes the cake."
"I'm sure Merlin jumped out of his Sword in the Stone Disney feature and had a hand in it."
"Pat's right. Besides oh godly one, you never told us how you got here."
"Drazin was eating french fries and then Drazin appeared on that beach."
"And magic french fries are better how?"
"At least Drazin can blame the french, Drazin bets they were Canadian too. Those damn french Canadians with their french "eh" can't be trusted. All the Blabbermouth runt here has is a flea. Drazin guesses she can blame a fleabag like you two. Great! The rhyming fleabag isn't done."
The Gawker's dome,
Was made of chrome.
With a shiny mohawk,
Increasing his gawk.
His Grammar Nazi chief,
Had crashed on the reef,
Heading to Bangkok,
Before getting gobbled up by the gawk.
The Dictionary Collector,
Was a knowledge protector.
Seeking a rare prized work,
Before he got gawked upon with a smirk.
The Penguin Man,
Was an obvious penguin fan.
He was on a secret mission,
And got gawked into submission.
These three lieutenants led the pack,
As they circled Blabber ready to attack.
She had nowhere to run,
Thinking she was done.
For The Gawker began to glare,
After seconds he parted his mohawk hair.
His head opened like a can,
Blabber found it gross and was not a fan.
Out popped a big eyeball,
The size of a basketball.
It was attached to a cord in his head,
And this is what he said.
The Gawker will have your soul,
This is the toll,
To live among The Gawker's land,
So give me your hand.
All your cares will go,
As you suffer my gawking glow.
Becoming one of my elite,
Won't you be a tasty treat.
He stepped closer,
Like a trained cat mouser.
Expecting Blabber to stay still,
But that ugly sight gave her OCD no thrill.
Thanks to her fit,
She still had her wit.
But being surrounded by each glowy eyed freak,
And stuck on Gawker Peak.
Left her with no course of action,
And she was slowly falling for his gawking attraction.
She kept worrying about her hair,
Almost succumbing to his stare.
When boom,
She swung her head around and her hair brought them doom.
It seemed to stretch for a mile,
And they found it quite vile.
The glowy eyed freaks charged her,
And the rest is a blur.
As Blabber stepped back,
And avoided their attack.
By accidentally falling from the peak,
Awaking to the tarsier near a creek.
And has since avoided another round with The Gawker coming due,
Still wishing for at least two kinds of shampoo.
"Fleabag, Drazin thinks that dust made you high. Magic hair? Falling from a cliff and living? Drazin knows this is all bull. Drazin is going to find this Gawker guy and make him eat that eyeball."
"It does seem like a bad day at Hogwarts or something."
"Even the godly mook makes more sense then this."
The three stood around confused and even though I felt a bit used, I somehow knew it was all true and could see everything in my mind's view. This dust was kind of cool and it did not make me drool. We all tried to process what we would have to do to stop The Gawker and his glowy eyed freakshow crew. We curled up and rested until dawn, hoping tomorrow we would be home and this place would be long gone.
********************
The more and more this damn place get shoved in the cat's face, the more we end up finding out some freaky crap. Dust that can make the cat rap? Geez, as if I need that. Now I was almost as whacko as Pat. But at least we were safe under the grass and that ends part three of the tale concerning my little rhyming ass.
Enjoy your winter, smash a printer.
Wow.. Wee Easy does it!
ReplyDeleteHank
First once more
DeleteAt my shore
Falling the cliff and living
ReplyDeleteGosh, did it again
Got in first,
Was no rehearse
Lucky it is
What bliss!
Hank
Yeah off she went
DeleteAnd didn't even get bent
As you came first
Once again with your burst
Here is the shocker...
ReplyDeleteyou have to deal with a Gawker!
Fleas for everyone!
What I just wrote really means nothing, but good post... LOL!
LOL it was quite fun though
DeleteAnd I hardly make much sense at my show
I see these three
ReplyDeleteat your bay.
They come here
often to play.
And you include
them in
your rhymes,
well it's about
bloody time.
I can't wait to see what Dez has to say about this!!
hahaha they've been included time and time again at my bay
DeleteUsually making fun as I have my say
Should be interesting to see what penguin man says too
As he got gawked and is now part of The Gawker crew
Annzie, this is strictly confidential, hope the cat won't hear us, but I've no idea who Gawker and Drazin and the rest of them are, I just pretend to have read cats meowing :)
DeleteDez can read above a two year old level though
DeleteSo we will have to cut him some slack at my show
Good grief, your flow is so animated and it might end up disseminated...
ReplyDeleteNow that is the kind of flow
DeleteI go for at my show
I have no words!! That was great!!! hahaha So Blabber got summoned to The Gawkers island by some magic flea? That's awful!!!!! At least the cat knows that their rescuer isn't lying! And the tarsier man saved her?! I can't think of a better rescuer!
ReplyDeleteWas Pat really afraid of his OCD running a muck? The poor girl has been trapped there for God knows how long. She better have cleaned! Hell, she better even clean things that are already clean just to pass the time! hahahaha
and now we know who The Gawker is! Dun dun dunnnnn lol
respect the hawk, even if you gawk, tis the season for fleas we just medicated our cat to cure them before being born, never had one whisk me away through, just nip and bite and not be nice....
DeleteLOL you will speak sooner or later I bet
DeleteWhen the big eyeball once more makes you fret
hahaha some magic flea on the knee
Mixed with shampoo sent Blabber across the sea
hahaha the tarsier was just there
He's not what saved you or some lucky hare
You shall see who/what saved you
Then they through you away because you weren't part of the cat's crew
LOL well it was dirt on the ground
He head no idea Blabber had a bunker under there that can be found
Yeah being bored to death on the island for so long
She prob cleaned so much making the smell so strong
That it made her go a tad french loon crazy
Or at least make her eyes hazy
Yep the Gawker is the mohawk guy
That leaves a comment and likes to hit reply..haha
LOL respect the hawk all shall indeed
DeleteOr they'll be gawked at on their feed
And sent to loony tune land
By a flea on the knee isn't that grand?
@Pat...of course Blabber will speak. She's so deafeningly quiet that I want to speak for her!! hahaha
DeleteThe tarsier didn't save her? How deceiving!!!! Then who or what did?!
So if you mix shampoo with a magic flea on a knee that could send you to Gawker islander? Now, does the flea HAVE to be on the knee, or the presence of the flea is just enough? Sigh...Wait until I send you some magic bed bugs hiding in Cupids Diaper! Watch where they send you! You may even turn into a crazy Indonesian loon!
P.S. Loved your Japanese reference above. I loled!!
lol...Jax, you crack me up. "I have no words!" but then you go on and on. Blabber is a good name for you, dear! hahahaha. Although "Chatty" would sound a little more appealing, don't you think? At least you got your shampoo! Now you need one more brand to rotate them!
Deletehahahaha after being on the island for so long
DeleteShe may even sing a song..hahahaha
The tarsier just found her there
And stayed with her because she had nice hair..haha
What/who saved you are a bunch of crazies which you will see
As they may also save me
That flea just had to be on your knee
To send you across the sea
So when you use shampoo
Within a certain time frame that comes due
Off you go
To suffer the gawk of The Gawker at his show
LOL a crazy Indonesian loon
Also this magic would make for a fine cartoon
hahaha had to throw them in
To not to would have been a sin
Petsy you are mistaken I say
DeleteAs no shampoo is at her bay
hahaha glad you agree with Blabber though
Chatty just doesn't have quite the same flow
well get that girl a bottle or two
Deleteas being with shampoo just will not do
At least make her glad
this trip she did have
while she has to be Blabber
and constantly jabber.
lol.
That's it...I'm proving how quiet I can be.
DeleteMy lips are sealed!
P.S. How long do I need to do this to prove my point???! I'm busting here!
you'll never last.
Deletenow don't cause a scene at work! haha.
haha there is no shampoo on the island though
DeleteSo I guess you'll have to let your twin know
Or I mean The Gawker
Like that was a shocker
She will Blabber either way
But it is fun I will say
LMAO that won't last long
As the Japanese will surely think something is wrong..haha
I think a second or two is enough
Any more than that and things would get rough
haha see two know it won't come due
So just give up and blabber away on cue
wow...Jax..you do impress
Deletebut I know this is killing you at best!
Wow a few hours without a blabber here
DeleteShe may think she caught some disease and been stricken with fear
I will continue to hold my toungue! Bullies....
DeleteP.S. I can't stop eating b/c my mouth just doesn't know what to do...
LOL first I hope you washed your hand or hands before you started holding your tongue
DeleteBet the Japanese really thing your bell is rung..hahaha
Second you can't continue to hold your tongue because you spoke
So now you have to start all over and please don't choke..haha
And third LMAO I hope you don't blame me
If an extra pound or two attaches itself to thee
Betsy is a bully too
See I agree with you..hahahaha
Yes, you and Betsy can split the bill for my new wardrobe. If I keep this up I'll be a size 3 by next week and won't have anything to wear.
DeleteNow excuse me while I go back to holding my toungue.
Zip!
Betsy started it
DeleteSo she can take more of the bill hit
60/40 I will say
Will work better at my bay....lol
But I have no fear
Of you growing a great big ummm rear...hahaha
For you could never keep your blabbermouth shut for a week
So I guess Betsy and I aren't up the creek
Hold the tongue but stop the drool
That is just so uncool
Oh dear and Oh my.
DeleteI laughed til I almost cried.
And what's this 60/40 fluff?
You started it, Mr. Tuff Stuff.
lol.
Yes, I think we are safe
as Jax can't really partake
of being in the silent state
Way too hard to be quiet
on talking she is reliant.
ha.
I called her blabber and she was fine
DeleteUntil you had to go and cross the line
That chatter chatty thing is nasty you see
If makes her teeth go like she saw something scary
And then she thinks she has some disease
All blabber does is bring forth fleas..hahaha
I just wanted to let you both know, I've decided to become a mute.
DeletePfffffft riiiight
DeleteThat will be over before you check your alarm clock for the first time tonight
See your none mute self in the morning at my sea
Where you will blabber away with glee..haha
I will tie myself to someone whenever I taste frenchfry. Not ready for timetravel now. And tarsier and his pointy ears and eyes and his rhyming , would be better match for Yoda. hawker and head, this is what I love about goggles and helmet.
ReplyDeletePut a helmet on him
DeleteAnd things may not seem so grim
Those french fries can be bad
So tie yourself down and you will be glad
I love your stuff even though I'm feeling rough. I can't wait to hear part four, if there isn't one... blame will fall... at your door? Best I can do Pat.
ReplyDeletehaha oh there will be a part four
DeleteHere at my shore
As the group goes to get rough
And tell The Gawker they've had enough
Uhhh... Refresh my memory, here. You said you don't do drugs, right? Haha!
ReplyDeleteLOL just naturally high
DeleteSo my brain doesn't fry
just say nope
Deleteso you don't end up dope
That's the way to be
DeleteAnd nope is said by me
A million times or more
At my shore
Wish I could find some dust to make me rap...
ReplyDeleteLOL sometimes dust
DeleteIs a must
"And the rest is a blur"
ReplyDeletethat sentence is one of the mechanisms that wannabe writers use when they grow tired of their own story and don't know how to finish it :P I've read countless bad books in which they spend 40 pages describing the heroes adventure to reach his goal, and when he finally reaches it, they just say -and then all happened in a blur and he woke up with the battle finished, enemies slayed and with the princess in his bed :))
Oh don't worry the cat would never do that
DeleteHe always knows the ending at his mat
Just one can't tell Blabber how she was saved just yet
As things first have to happen to the pet
I hate when they get lazy and do that too
Just ruins the whole thing, sad but true
Great rhymes!
ReplyDeleteGreat today
DeleteAs always at my bay
Big Action
ReplyDeleteBig Drama
Big Death
Big Whoop.
lol. :)
LOL just my luck
DeleteYou are quoting Puck
I knew you'd laugh at that
Deletefor things stuck in my brain, I'm blaming you, pat.
hahahaha
It's enough to make me scream blue murder
and yes, you are a crazy writer.
Having comment issues as you can tell.
DeleteWTH?!
ha.
hahaha so fun to get such things stuck in your brain
DeleteJust to see you have to use them at my lane
Scream blue murder hahaha that is good too
All kinds of crazy things come/came due
Yes I can tell
As you try to ring the comment bell
A movie? Maybe?
Deletehaha a cartoon movie would be grand
DeleteTo show off my land
I read all Pat but I finish exausted, shampoo (you love this), fleas (lol)
ReplyDeleteI was exhausted, too! ha.
Deleteoh, I'm still exhausted :) The cat needs to rub our feet after this :)
DeleteLOL yes love picking away
DeleteOver the shampoo display
Pfft you exhaused yeah right
You'll just suck back another cup of coffee and your energy will be back at its height..haha
Pffft rub your own feet
That cat will even toss you a treat
a foot massage...my favorite
Deletethanks Dez for suggesting he do it!
Pffft go head and try
DeleteThe cat will claw away at each girl and guy
Cats don't pet us, we pet them, they've got us conditioned to serve them at will.
DeleteExactly the case
DeleteAnne knows her place..LOL
I like Dez's idea better.
DeleteWhen he wakes up, I'm sure he'll agree
it's better to rub our toes, you see
and we'll let you do it for free!
hahaha.
hell, I won't let him do it for free, he has to pay for us to let him rub our royal, in your case Betsy, or imperial, in my case, feet :) It's the biggest honour for any feline minion.
DeletePfft the cat will rub something against your feet
DeleteI guaruntee you won't think it's sweet
Would prob strick fear
And I'd get more than an oh dear..haha
Right! You can take your penguins and have them nip of your toes
And let me know how that goes
For you will truly waddle around
Being all toe less bound
more than an 'oh dear'?
Deletesomething like "don't touch me with those bloody uglies!"
lol.
LOL bloody hell
DeleteYou stole the line I was going to tell...haha
lol...so sorry I beat you to it.
DeleteI've been reading all night and had to prove it!
hahaha
haha that you did with ease
DeleteMaybe even beatings those magic fleas
you cant trust a French canadian ? i think so too :)
ReplyDeletehahaha glad you agree
DeleteBut that's with Drazin not me
Haha, chapter three was quite the see, magic dust to rap to, mohawks split, knowledge protected, but the Drazin and his magic french fry and his blaming french Canadians just takes the cake here- can't wait to see what chapter four has in store
ReplyDeletehahaha yeah Drazin is quite the mook
DeleteThose french fries might now may him puke
That be nasty to see
And magic dust getting a rap out of me
Because of some flea
Is a tad ummm crazy
a magic flea is not the solitary reason
ReplyDeletedrazin can hold his own in any gosh darn season
his view of the french not as sharp as his hook
a flea on the knee and you knowthe tarsier is going to have a look
blue murder sure is the thing to scream
nothing more worrisome to me than the gawker's dream
Yeah the godly one can hold is own
DeleteEven if he likes to moan and groan
With the view of a mook or something on par
Yet he still gets pretty far
The tarsier would eat the flea
Then climb up a tree
Such good flow, a lyrical genius!!
ReplyDeleteSounds like a plan to me
DeleteAs I rhyme day and night at my sea
Well jumping in in the middle of something is always a bad idea so I wont lie when I say I was lost but this was pretty frigin funny :)
ReplyDeletehaha yeah in the middle one can get lost
DeleteAnd it may cost
But glad it was still funny
As The Gawker and his eyeball is less than sunny
Pretty genius stuff, which I've come to expect from you already. :)
ReplyDeleteHopefully I can keep it up steady
DeleteAs my genuis seems at the ready
I actually feel like scrolling back and hearing the Tarsier Man's track but then sanity prevailed...LOL
ReplyDeleteI always wondered where the 'eh? came from ...now I know! Saying nothing ..uh uh... hehe
hahaha yeah those french brought forth the eh I say
DeleteCausing me all the eh dismay
Tarsier Man would like you to hear once more
As he appreciates an encore
Magic dust? What kind of drug is that?
ReplyDeletehaha it is brand new
DeleteIt makes you rhyme without a clue
A flea on the knee... Hmm reminds me of the flea markets I go to when I visit Florida.
ReplyDeleteFlea markets in Florida give fleas?
DeleteRemind me to protect my knees
# It does seem like a bad day at Hogwarts or something...
ReplyDeleteIt had me laughing for a big time :P
your freaky crap is a treat 4 readers :)
haha had to throw in a reference or two
DeleteAnd that one fit with such a freaky view
Glad it's a treat
As the readers come to take a seat
A flea on the knee?
ReplyDeleteCould be worse, old chum.
Instead of the knee
A flea up your bum?
Yeah that would be worse
DeleteOnce would curse
As they sat down
Feeling their gifted flea bite crown
The eyeball bit gave me interesting mental images
ReplyDeletehaha be scary if it did not
DeleteAs images it gave to me a whole lot
Yikes for more fleas on the knee and the eyeball as big as basketball ~ Very imaginative Pat ~
ReplyDeleteHave a good night ~
The eyeball would be the worst
DeleteWould sure be a scary burst..haha
Awesome rhymes, as always.
ReplyDeleteGlad you think so
DeleteAs I rhyme away at my show
Fleas are a real bitch!!!!
ReplyDeleteLOL that they are
DeleteSending people near and far
A flea is a hopper
ReplyDeleteThis is true
But why does it have to be
Shampoo times two?
Everyone knows that shampoo times three
Will bring you much further beyond the sea.
Trust me, my friend, there will be no Gawkers
But beware of the billions and billions of Facebook stalkers.
Wow billions of Facebook stalkers
DeleteSure there will be some mighty big shocker
Times three
May delight the flea
As then it would send them to timbukto
A time or two
fleas on her knees--that does sound like quite the predicament LOL!
ReplyDeleteLOL yep quite the predicament indeed
DeleteOf fleas one should always take heed
Unda da sea... unda da sea...~
ReplyDeleteNow you got that song in my head
DeleteOh the dread
i dont use shampoo lol
ReplyDeleteUmmm never ever?
DeleteThat may be an ewww endeavor
Quite the tale lol, i can only imagine the Grammer Nazi in Bangcock, spelling intentional. I will resist the urge to crack any more jokes. You should market that dust, i think a lot of politicians and bankers would happily snort it, imagine the rhymes they would spout, from the snout as the voters and customers pout. Certainly it would be more interesting.
ReplyDeleteLOL well you won't make me choke
DeleteAs that was set up for such a joke
Hmm I could get rich
But giving the politician the rhyming twitch
Maybe I should market it
Might be quite the hit
Give me some of that dust the next time I write an essay, I need all the help I can get.
ReplyDeletehaha a rhyming essay would be fun
DeleteNot sure you'd get a good grand though for such a run