Sunday, April 15, 2012

Island Of The Gawker Part Seven. Little Blue Guy From Heaven?

There was Penwassa sitting on his toilet throne while all the cavemen types bowed and continued to groan. Zen, Max Evil and the Sweet Lust trio were on their not as shiny toilet thrones too. All Pat could do was curl up his nose and repeat eww. Miss Priss noticed Petsy, Blabber, Irish Air and Besercules trying to break free and I saw some guards whisper in Penwassa's ear that they could not find me.

"Drazin's had enough of this. Tarzan's apes had more fight in them then these antique humans. Drazin will teach them a lesson or ten."

"I'm with the godly mook, let's break them free."

"As long as I don't have to touch that toilet, I'm game."

We marched from the shadows and Penwassa gasped at us while his fellow cavemen cult weirdos kicked up a fuss. He flipped the handle on the toilet up and down fifty times trying to get them to stop their chimes. I guess it was his way of bringing the cult to order. He was pretty good at being a cavemen hoarder. He rose from his feet like God himself and pointed to us from his toilet throne shelf.

"See, not even our jail could hold the power of our savoir. He has come back to send us above. Let the sacrifice commence."

Drazin marched up and smacked a couple in the head and Pat did the same causing them dread. But those cavemen were thicked headed and fought back surrounding them and preventing any attack. Miss Priss slunk through the crowd and the smug toilet throne weirdos acting all proud. I knew I had to distract them fast and that is when that dust gave me another rhyming blast. I began to rhyme away, as Miss Priss attempted to chew through the binds of those to be sacrficed on display.

Give me a look,
As I hop about your nook.
You got plants,
With some yummy ants.

A hut with a fire,
Some rubber tire.
A bed made of grass,
This creepy lass.

An unshaved mug,
Such a loveable lug.
Face of a pug,
A cool water jug.

It floats too,
A fish that can...moo.
Weird but cool,
Here where you rule.

So why go up high,
To that sky,
Full of fluff,
Seeing all in the buff.

Showing private things,
Sporting fluffy wings.
If a bell is rang,
And you know, dang,

What a great throne,
And crown made of bone.
Here you can sit,
Above your death pit.

And if you have to go,
Let it flow.
With some cavemen,
Mooning in their den,

Fighting over scraps,
Such mindless chaps.
But still so great,
You don't need such a fate.

Stay here on the ground,
Where all you need is found.
Why look above,
Flying like some dove.

When you can stay,
Here and play.
Your bone drum,
And even pick a plum.

Isn't that yum?
I know you want to hum.
So join on in,
Give it a spin.

Jump up and down,
Already in crazy town.
So go with the flow,
Let your jig show.

I had them all dancing in some rumba type thing and they were letting their hands and feet fling. These guys were so easy to fool and yeah those cavemen sure could drool. Drazin and Pat helped Miss Priss and I heard her hiss, telling me that was a wrap as it was time to run from this Penwassa chap. But he spotted them all free and I jumped on his head with glee.

Ignore the sights,
And the dictated rights.
Just go with the flow,
Chow down on a crow.

Forget the above sky,
It's all a lie.
You'll go below,
To a fiery show.

So spend your time here,
Invent the gear.
Then sign a deal,
And maybe get to the wheel.

Klacky klipper
You need a zipper
But not much to view,
So its okay and now I bid adieu.

"Blashpemer! Get them before the sacrifices escape."

Oh and did I mention,
We can increase the tension.
For if you don't concede,
In will come a stampede.

The ground began to rumble and the cavemen started to stumble. The little tarsier sounded the charge and he lead in the whole animal barge. Petsy jumped up on her elephant as it came near. Besercules lead his apes on an assualt striking fear while Miss Priss and I hopped on Pat's shoulder and Drazin laughed as he shoved a boulder. It rolled off a hill and crushed their toilet thrones giving him a thrill. Irish Air pulled out some hidden ninja sword drum sticks and started to pick off the incoming hicks. While Blabber let her hair spin and kept them from securing any win. Petsy let loose a cry and huge birds swooped in from the sky. They started darting at the cavemen and chasing them around as Pat stared at the ground. He noticed a lever beneath Penwassa's toilet throne and pulled the end of the lever made of bone. It let loose a fizzle and we knew the shield came down and we could leave this backwater town.

Besercules yelled at each ape and made his escape, as Petsy howled once more or I guess it could have been some kind of roar. Either way the birds came our way and snatched us up from this crazy bay. Irish Air once more said things I will not repeat, as the cavemen were left in defeat. The tarsier once more resided with Blabber who was also on a bird and Drazin was yelling thinking it was absurd, that he had to ride out on a hippo instead. We all enjoyed causing him dread. And off we went back to Petsy's lair as Blabber fixed her hair, Irish Air continued to swear and Pat was normal, which was rare. Although our victory may come up short for a blue spotlight shined down over Petsy's court and as we approached a little blue guy could be seen who looked rather mean. I would say he was ticked off indeed and we all began to take heed.

********************
So the cult is now toast and over that we can boast. Especially the cat for it was I who distracted that caveman rat with the rhymes I gave about their God awful, smelly cave. That took some skill, yet I gave them their fill. Plus a little bit of sass and they now know not to mess with my little rhyming ass.

Experience spring, have a fling.

128 comments:

  1. Nice rhymes and nice story!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Two nices at once today
      R is on a roll I say

      Delete
  2. This is awesome Pat, you should seriously consider turning Island of the Gawker into a book or publication of some sort, I know I'd do my best to buy it!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I'm thinking I just may
      If I can find some time one day
      As that would surely be fun
      To have done

      Delete
  3. at least you survived this hive, but beware that fish that moos, for sure, dance the rhumba and you never bore, grape ape gaping tale, gimme more ...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Next up at my shore
      For when you want more
      Is a little blue guy
      And then no lie
      It will be the gawker we face
      And try to remove that eyeball out of place..haha

      Delete
  4. This is most excellent Pat. And Al is in here too on his toilet throne. He'll love it. I remember the first time I came to your blog and thinking "Jesus Christ, who is this guy and how can he write all this?" And I continued to come back and comment and then to read the comments. I noticed that your replies were a blog in and of themselves. And again I thought "Jesus Christ, who is this guy and how can he write all this?" And I continued to come back and I noticed all the play going on between your followers and I thought to myself "I wish I could be one of those people, but I never will be so I'll be content to read and comment."

    And now I come here, to this place on the blogoshpere where the light is always on and someone is always home to make me laugh and I find myself incorporated into your rhyme and playing with you and your friends. And I still ask myself "Who is this guy and how can he write all this."

    Thank you Pat.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. awwww, that was a touching comment.
      Cat, don't mess it up now :) say something nice to Annzie :)

      Delete
    2. yes, we're all waiting in anticipation
      ...an awkward silence..
      ....a lull before his compliment...

      well, cat? welllll?

      Delete
    3. Betsy the cat was enjoying the sun
      And had to go for the grocery run
      But never fear
      He is here

      Dez, how could I mess that up
      I will tip my cup

      hahahaha I have no idea how it is done
      Just comes out and I give it a run
      But for me it is all about the fun
      And the poor you interact the more you get to know someone
      That is another reason to react to the comments below
      Because it can be such a fun comment flow
      And you learn little things here and there
      Then you can use them when writing at one lair
      Like the whole Gawker thing
      That the cat continues to sing
      It really has a mind of it's own at my sea
      As I never expected half to come and actually rhyme or leave big ass comments at bush number three
      But so it came to pass
      And it is such fun to my little rhyming ass
      The people of blogger land are more fun then many people in real life
      Who only wish to bitch and cause strife
      And you quickly became one of the few
      That I/we can have quite fun with in the comment crew
      Still have no idea how it is done
      But I guess that is part of the fun
      And glad you enjoy it too
      As that will just keep them up at my zoo
      No matter the crap that comes my way
      Even if I'm felt up by that big overgrown pimpley faced nut job american that you said about at your bay..LMAO

      Delete
    4. a grocery run
      oh, how fun
      were the prices high and the lines long
      did you read the gossip magazines and sing a song
      while waiting to check out
      or did you have a shout?

      Delete
    5. Prices were surely high
      But the line was not this try
      As I was in and out of it
      Without much of a fit

      Delete
    6. This grew beyond
      what you knew.
      A rhyme here
      a rhyme there
      a lot of flair
      and crazy Irish Air
      have come to you bay
      to enjoy the play.

      I just got back from the grocers and the prices were high and I may have cursed.

      Delete
    7. Yeah grew far far beyond
      But of it I am fond
      And the grocers is quite insane
      Prices that could make one pop a vein

      Delete
    8. Pat, Anne is messing with your brain! I tell you, her Irish Air Nephews do the exact same thing: cold, warm, cold... until you're hooked! Don't you get hooked now!

      Delete
    9. Hmm I never thought of that
      Good job warning the cat

      Delete
  5. A posting that rhymes
    Happens all the time
    Sitting on the throne
    Toilet bowl that moans

    Hank

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yep every single day
      Here at my bay
      Except for the throne
      That is Al's tone

      Delete
  6. Replies
    1. LOL he was comic relief
      After he caused us grief

      Delete
  7. You did it again
    with your mighty pen
    so many rhymes
    bring cheerful times!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yep tons of rhymes can come
      From my little rhyming bum
      Enough to mae some hurl
      But I will still give them a whirl

      Delete
  8. I already met Dezmond, maybe I should visit and say hi too
    to your other blogger friends that I read here at your mat..:-)

    Yes, I feel at home here in your lair
    As I go with the dance and let my hair
    down, go with the flow, as you say
    in your rhyming den, I want to visit today :-)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. just don't blame me, Grace, when Cat starts behaving all feline :) Me didn't introduce him to you :)

      Delete
    2. Well Dez is the worst of the bunch
      Really out to lunch
      So if you stand him
      The rest won't be as grim..LMAO

      Glad you feel at home
      As you come to roam
      That is all I want to do
      Is have fun at my zoo

      No I think it was dVerse or Onestop or Brian that did that
      But then I could be a confused cat

      Delete
    3. me really is the worst :) /landsonhisbackandexpectsabellyrub/ :)

      Delete
    4. Ha..ha..Dez, you are so funny ~

      Delete
    5. Oh Dez you is bad. Long live the Alliance!!

      Delete
    6. Grace and Anne can belly rub away
      I will just leave you to it and go the other way

      Delete
    7. Good for you
      Now you just need the guy that is blue

      Delete
    8. Maybe he knows
      Or is just looking at his toes

      Delete
  9. You Blasphemer?Flushed away? This island of Gawker series is cute and is more like a riddle for me. I need more clues to crack some Petsy, Blabber and Tarsier? RCB or little blue guy?
    Irish air continued to swear? Looks like Irish air seems to be the oracle and has all answers as long as you learn to ask right questions?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. LOL all the clues can be found under the tab above
      Where who's who at bush number 3 gives all some love
      Irish Air just swears away
      Each and every bloody day

      Delete
    2. Yes, I feckin' well do. Me and the penguin man, who throws poo.

      Delete
    3. Oh so he throws poo
      And you just tell him what to do

      Delete
    4. @meandmythinkingcap - Sure, pretend you've never heard of the Blue Man or that you've never ever e.v.e.r. visted him telling him about your English mistakes and that he should follow you. Remember THIS?

      @Pat See, this one's trying to trick you, too!

      Delete
    5. RCB- I thought you shall be after me for my grammar alone. ;-)
      I had noticed you as RCB, I didnt know about your Blue man monicker. I am still in learning mode at Pat/Cat's bay. I still dont know whether Darzin and Gawker are real entities or Pat's alter egos.
      So much to do, so little time ;-)

      Delete
    6. I see now she is very tricky
      And you think her english is icky
      Can't say I disagree
      But I'm not all too grammar nazi at my sea

      Still learning the ropes
      Good luck! I have high hopes...haha

      Delete
    7. @meandmythinkingcap - You had noticed RCB but not my beautiful picture? Or THIS one where I'm talking to a piggy or THIS one where Little Red is looking after me? Really? Aaaawwwwww!

      Delete
  10. and Pat was normal, which was rare

    well, that line just sums sit all up, doesn't it?
    lol.

    glad my roars
    could soar
    and bring in birds from the sky
    so away we could fly!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. LMAO yeah that is very very rare
      Here at my lair or any where
      Except poor Drazin you left him on the ground
      Like some butt sniffing hound..haha

      Delete
    2. Can't Drazin just fly himself
      he's a so-called god, afterall.
      Mayne I should send a big bird back after him
      something like an ostrich that can carry Drazin.
      lol.

      Delete
    3. hahaha I suppose then he could run real fast
      Or with his ego so vast
      Shove his head in the ground
      Still trying to act all profound

      Delete
  11. Replies
    1. Wait until the next one
      Then Gloria gets to have some fun..lol

      Delete
    2. Sounds interesting Pat. ha! i know you "dear" lol

      Delete
    3. Yeah a dear will come due
      When you come too

      Delete
  12. I always tell myself that I should go and visit some of the names mentioned here - hopefully after I get my laptop problem solved.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yeah go and visit away
      Plenty of fun at each blog bay

      Delete
    2. She visited me........... and now she's my friend, too, Pat, Jaya J and Az! :p

      Delete
    3. See the cat is helping you
      Bora Bora must come due

      Delete
  13. My hair saved the day once again!!! See, the placenta is worth it!! I knew that Petsy's animals would save the day!!!! LOL And I'm glad that I got my tarsier back. I missed him!!! hahahaha

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I suppose the placenta has it's strong points
      Just keep it far far far away from my nose joints..haha
      Yeah you were right on
      With your last guess at my lawn
      I had this all written too
      So I guess some psychic powers are had by you..haha
      Yep Tarsier is back
      And ready to help attack

      Delete
    2. I am no psychic ;) I'm just glad that the 4 of us made it out safe. What a shame it would be to sacrifice 4 such amazing people!!!!! lol

      Delete
    3. haha just a good guesser then
      Here at my den
      LOL yes it would be quite the shame
      Besides those guys were kind of lame
      Being cavemen and all
      Wait until we enter gawker hall
      Then the cat will use all as a shield
      Until the gawker decides to yield
      And he will survive
      But who else will come out alive?..haha

      Delete
    4. I'm surprised he didn't just roast us all Jax and he's not done with us yet. To be used as a human shield has long been a dream of mine.

      Delete
    5. LOL you may all roast before it is through
      And I could just make your dream come true

      Delete
    6. LOL Anne...you really think he'd kill us off? I already had to be resurrected once after the whole Easter bunny attack. How many times can we be brought back to life?! lol

      Delete
    7. LOL well according to many shows I have seen
      You can be brought back to life 100's of time so I can be mean
      And kill you all
      Over and over at my hall

      Delete
    8. He'll never kill us, he needs us too much. Who else would put up with him like we do?

      Delete
    9. LOL I have Drazin to all back on
      Or Tarsier Man and the many voices in my head at my lawn...haha

      Delete
  14. You jumped on his head?

    I bet the Super Mario stomp made his noggin feel like lead.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yeah I was thinking of mario as I did it
      Nice that you caught that bit

      Delete
  15. awesome :)

    http://fizzvideo.blogspot.com/

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Less words than R
      My you will go far

      Delete
    2. A smart mouth comment I would make,
      But you never know if humor will take.

      Delete
    3. haha bah nothing is off limits here
      So have no fear

      Delete
  16. I knew that my girls Irish air and Petsy would be resourceful! Elephants and hidden swords, that's the trademark of my alliance members!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. yes, we not only have beauty, but brains, too!
      Very resourceful, yes, it's true!

      Delete
    2. Geez this is one big ego prop up today
      For me and many others my way
      Petsy ain't in your alliance that is true
      If she is she too will get pelted with poo..lol

      Getting animals to come to your aid
      Worked well to make those cavemen fade

      Delete
    3. Betsy the goddess has an alliance of her own
      it's her zoo that fills her own mountain dome.
      ha.

      Delete
    4. That works for me
      Better to have an alliance that is furry
      Then some penguin man
      That would not make me a fan

      Delete
    5. off course Petsy is in our alliance, she and the Blue one are our secret members, she controls the underworld bearing the Undergoddess name, while the Blue one does what he does... and I know not what that is :)

      What do you mean I won't make you a fan? I've even tattooed your name on me sweet bum :)

      Delete
    6. We have yet to subvert the Blue Man completely to our will Dez. He could be a double agent working both sides for pay from a third party. And I don't know who that third party is yet, but I'll make it up and when I do, whoever they are, will pay.

      Delete
    7. Pffft Petsy is just a member in your head
      Pretty soon her elephant will come and cause your penguins dread
      Ohhhh is there a paw print too
      Tell and never show such a view..haha

      The Blue Man will never go your way
      He is with the cat at my bay
      Or at least pretends too
      Maybe one should track down who the third party is hiding in his loo

      Delete
    8. Annzie, we should somehow cunningly scheme and plot to make Cat be the third party who pays for his own doom :) Imagine such mischievous irony, him unwittingly paying the Blue one to destroy him?

      Delete
    9. The cat would never pay a dime
      To any such crime
      The cat would need dough first
      So you fail in your burst..haha

      Delete
    10. I like that idea Dez. We are just tricky enough to pull this off. Schemes withing schemes are my specialty and the cat, well he's not the brightest cookie in the jar now is he? He still hasn't found the device we put under his bed. It's doing exactly what it's supposed to do.

      Delete
    11. What be invisible and cause bad dreams at my sea?
      Oh that was the bad mouse I ate with glee.
      Guess your machine is broke
      Another fail showing how the alliance will always choke..haha

      Delete
    12. under the device you mean a stinky sock we left there for him, yes?

      Delete
    13. The cat would eat that
      So all is fine at our mat

      Delete
  17. I'm disappointed with Bersecules. All he did was yell. Come on! Punch a monkey a least. :\

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. LOL Besercules had his day the last time
      Thinking he was so sublime
      Then we fixed his apes
      And he hoped the cavemen crushed us like grapes

      Delete
    2. let us pray, Berserc doesn't make a podcast on this adventure :)))

      Delete
    3. LMAO yes that would be bad
      But I'm sure a fun time would be had

      Delete
  18. Love these stories. So much fun to figure out; I never know who all the names refer to but the story is great.

    Loved your movies post too Pat.

    ......dhole

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Glad you liked each one
      I always love my movie fun
      Yeah if you aren't in the know
      It can be tough to figure out each person in the story flow

      Delete
  19. Love the rhymes, who would've guessed they would save the day from the restroom bay. Lots of animals played a role, I hope to peta a disclaimer was sold, otherwise there may be some loon looking to set the record free, asking for some answers from the cat at bush number three.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Well all the loon will get is rhyme
      And he might find that a crime
      So he will leave me be
      And go bug some other sea
      And the restroom bay
      Is toast and in dismay
      Love it
      Quite a bit..haha

      Delete
  20. Hitting Al below the belt - perfect; and he'll love it. Well, verbally, not physically...

    And, I learned something new from checking out your Who's Who page - Miss Priss is not another Blogger!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. LOL had to poke fun at Al at my sea
      It just causes such glee
      And Miss Priss is another cat
      Here at our mat

      Delete
    2. Al is such a funny trip,
      and loves to dish out lots of lip.
      I've found that he can solve a puzzle
      in addition to not opening his muzzle
      so for that I am a huge fan
      and at my blog I'll never ban, er, him

      Delete
    3. LOL I will ban him though
      Just for his toilet show
      That might mess with my ocd
      And then I would have to ban him from bush number three
      But as long as his smell doesn't come
      Then he won't be banned by my little rhyming bum..haha

      Delete
  21. Please check your factinary mail
    Something for you I set sail.
    :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. what? What? Petsy sends love mail to the cat, pray tell us more, Petsy, I'm all ear :)

      Delete
    2. lol...I'll let Pat tell
      if he thinks it's swell
      really it's just a conspiracy
      to perk your curiosity!
      ha.

      Delete
    3. geesh...how stinking long do I have to wait for a reply? You act like you have a life outside the blogs or something! lol. Sigh.

      Delete
    4. Yes today I was slow
      Away from the blog show
      But I will go look now
      Don't have a cow..haha
      And we will leave Dez on the outside
      I say that with pride..haha

      Delete
    5. Dez is reading your email right now cat.

      Delete
    6. Pfft he has to track down the right one
      As I have a ton
      Like 200 emails addresses or so
      So good luck searching those at your show

      Delete
    7. yep, read it all, and I've sent you a report on it, Annzie, it's in your throne chamber in Dublin :) Nothing interesting though, Petsy just wanted to share the rat recipe with the cat.... the two of them are more boring in their emails than the Pope on a Sunday mass :)

      Delete
    8. oh good...you found the placebo one
      haha...I faked you out a ton.
      Sorry Dez...
      some private emails just shouldn't be read.
      but since you're so curious I'll let you in
      on a little bit of what was sent
      It had to do with a monkey, some extra eyes,
      and banana and the skies.
      There's your riddle for the day
      on this subject, that's all I'll say.
      lol.

      Delete
    9. LOL Dez surely got the placebo one
      He is so easy to trick it is no fun

      Delete
    10. What? What? You will use a banana on Cat? Pray do tell us more, Petsy, I'm strangely amused :)

      Delete
    11. LOL you will just have to wait to see what comes due
      If anything for you to view

      Delete
    12. silly dez..the cat does not like bananas
      I know that for a fact
      your imaginagtion is hilarious
      as you sit there in your shack.
      hahahaha.

      Delete
    13. yep, he does look like he would prefer cucumbers :)

      Delete
    14. Cat has no idea on those
      We'll see how it goes
      In an eating way only though
      No show

      Delete
  22. That's a lot of rhyming all in one blog. Oh my, you've got me all rhymed out and I haven't even made a rhyme at all. Cute post. Lots of thought was put into this, I'm sure. Happy Sunday to you!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You'd be surprised how little thought was actually put into it
      As I just have my daily rhyming fit..haha

      Delete
  23. I'm not always completely positive what's happening in these story parts--but they're a lot of fun to read!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. haha yeah they are a big out there
      But glad it's always fun at my lair

      Delete
  24. I know I want to hum but I'm a bum no phun for me

    ReplyDelete
  25. What do you know? Well, well, well.
    "Penwassa on the toilet throne"
    That cat of Pat is sure swell
    to throw this old dude a bone.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yep you were king
      Of the caveman like thing
      With your throne like a loo
      I bet that's something many never knew..haha

      Delete
  26. Okay Pat I started the day out being nice to you, but dammit, I can't end it that way. It would be wrong, so very, very wrong. So before I log off for the night I have this to say "Up yours cat!"

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Well take your bloody up yours
      And go back to your bloody shores
      Bugger off and find a bloody wanker
      Now I'm off to see a banker

      Delete
  27. I gotta go back and read the other parts now

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. That might take a while
      As I went the rhyming mile

      Delete
  28. I like the Bersercules character! He's very relatable!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. He's in part 2,7 and 10
      Here at my den

      Delete