Tuesday, May 15, 2012

Get Here Quick For Some dVerse Spotted Dick!

Spotted Dick is yummy,
Spotted Dick is grand.
It can reach the tummy,
Or stick to your hand.

Get it by the penny,
Get it by the pound.
I hear there is plenty,
Even for a hound.

Sometimes it is rough,
Sometimes it is creamy.
One can never get enough,
When it's oh so steamy.

Show it at a party,
Show it at the mall.
Eat it with a smartie,
Roll it down the hall.

Serve it on a dish,
Serve it on a platter.
Don't forget to make a wish,
When you see the splatter.

Stock up for cold weather,
Stock up for the sun.
Eat Spotted Dick together,
And everyone has won.

Don't forget to clean,
Don't forget to re-use.
For you could make a scene,
When the garbage men stamp refuse.

If only there were more,
If only it was bigger.
I could make an encore,
Telling of its vigor.

You'll just need two,
To get things done.
Yes, it is true.
You can feed it to a nun.

So step right up,
And give it a lick.
Today you fill your cup,
With some Spotted Dick!


I'm sure you can imagine the cat's delight as he typed this up the other night. For I saw this at a shore here and there and knew it had to be done at my lair. I even shared it with dVerse so they can fill their purse. Doesn't it sound oh so tasty? Now don't be hasty. Pop the top and maybe it's like Pringles and you can't stop. Next time you go to the store ask for some Spotted Dick and I bet you will surely confuse even the smartest hick. Of course you may get a whole lot more on display but we won't go there today. I hear it also might cause gas so Spotted Dick could make me a totting little rhyming ass.

Experience spring, have a fling.

156 comments:

  1. Spotted dick makes me sick...no really!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. How dare you show your face in public after what you did to me on your blog today! First you back this poo eating cat and then you tell a one sided story that makes it look like I betrayed you. You're in for it now Francis!!!!

      Delete
    2. Go read his blog darling and defend my honor!!

      Delete
    3. haha better watch out by giving that info away
      The alliance might try to use them to poison you at your bay

      He should be proud of what he did
      For it made you flip your lid
      Works for the cat
      As we continue to squash the alliance flat

      Dez are you going to put butter on your toast
      And let it roast?

      I defended him
      I hope he makes you go for a swim
      With the fishes
      That would satsify one of the cat's wishes

      Delete
    4. We'll be settling this thing at Shenanigans Pub on Friday after my emergency Press Conference.

      Delete
    5. I've just threatened Lurk at his place, dahling!

      Delete
    6. You can settle all you want
      For the cat won't be around to taunt
      So it won't have the same effect for me
      Guess Lurk is all alone at his sea

      Delete
    7. You'll be en route to the States I take it. Will you be in on Thursday? I plan on obliterating you and I need you here for it.

      Delete
    8. Nope away
      After today
      So I won't be here
      For your supposed fear

      Delete
    9. you mean you is leaving the place unprotected and we can trash it? Or is you giving it to Jaxy again.... she's our general now... access to the keys would be in Alliance's hands!

      Delete
    10. LMAO you can have a bash
      Just clean up the trash
      As Jaxy won't be here either at my hall
      But the cat may still be on call

      Delete
  2. What are you up to this time Cat, or Pat?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Just handing out some spotted dick
      There is no trick

      Delete
  3. um yeah...tragic branding with keep this from landing anywhere near my plate...not that i have any hate but...sponge pudding is bad enough to give a shock...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. hahaha I must agree
      Never will end up at my sea
      For just from the name
      I could not eat it no matter how tame

      Delete
    2. At Outer Banks, we ate at Dirty Dick's.

      Delete
    3. That sounds like a nasty place
      I would not want to show my face

      Delete
  4. I found this marketing ploy tragically funny ~ Unfortunately some of us shoppers fall for such tricks and buy it, even though we don't really need it ~ Happy day to you Pat ~

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yeah many fall for it
      Here and there for a bit
      But not sure I would ever fall for this
      Spotted dick does not bring about bliss

      Delete
  5. I feel proud of you for this naughtiness, you know, cat? :PPP

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I still remember when one of the big US brands launched KENJARA coffee label (it was obviously a coffee from Kenya). It was hilarious here in Serbia, since in our language "kenjara" means "deep shit" :)

      Delete
    2. I often wonder why marketing executives don't just google something like that.

      Delete
    3. hahaha oh you feel proud of the cat?
      I'll have to mark that down at my mat
      And save that one
      When the zombie foot returns one day for some fun..haha

      LMAO oh that be too funny
      Want some deep shit? May be runny
      hahaha oh dear
      Maybe I can market the stuff from my rhyming rear

      True they should at least google that
      Or maybe they have a strategy but using strat

      Delete
    4. Oh no, Dez!! Proud of the cat?? Are you running a fever? =PP

      Delete
    5. Those pills must be messing with him
      Unless he just agreed on a whim..haha

      Delete
    6. It's all part of a carefully planned ruse cat. The trap has been sprung and it's far too late for you. So give it up cat!!

      Delete
    7. Annzie is right. And besides I'm off the pills. I only use walrus tranquillizers when me is about to go to sleep, but that's nothing...

      Delete
    8. yep, googling things up should be advisable. I'm always shocked when someone in US names their daughter Kara. It means "dick" in Serbian.

      Delete
    9. Pfft away you flap
      About a trap
      But it will not come to be
      For you can never trap me

      hahaha well I guess supergirl better watch out
      When her real name gets a shout

      Delete
    10. I should have known the Alliance would have secret plans in place!

      Delete
    11. yep, we're not sure what the plan is, but it will surely be nasty and cunning :)

      Delete
    12. By the time you think of it
      The cat will already have stopped your fit

      Delete
    13. it, fit, you do repeat the same rhymes awfully a lot, cat....

      Delete
    14. Well it is only you
      What do you expect me to do?
      A new one each time?
      Pfft that would just be a crime

      Delete
  6. Never tried it before (probably due to geographical reasons as well as the name being a totally giggle inducing type)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yeah never tried it one bit
      Would prob cause my stomach to have a fit

      Delete
  7. It's British, right? I've heard of it. And Sticky Dick, too...which is even more hilarious. :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. LOL yeah sticky dick is funny as well
      But I remained more poka dot today at my cell

      Delete
  8. This is wrong! So very wrong!
    I do not want spotted dong!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. hahaha can't say I blame you
      Not something I would want to come due
      But might go good with your steak
      Or something else you want to make..haha

      Delete
  9. Happy Flappy Day, Pat!
    I know you're sleeping in at your mat.
    Oh you'll need lots of energy, alright
    when Flappy comes to work tonight!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yes stupid Flappy will be here
      To cause flack for my little rhyming rear
      But Pat had to get up as well
      As he was out getting felt up which was swell
      Fixing the stupid neck
      Which is knock on wood no longer such a wreck

      Delete
    2. Hope Flappy produces a story there
      that you can tell at your blog lair.

      And glad you finally got that checked
      it's really been a pain in the neck.
      um...yeah, it has! lol....

      Delete
    3. I hope she cancels and I can go home
      Away from my crummy work dome..haha

      Yeah it has been for months on end
      Muscles in there are causing such a trend
      And so had to get them massaged out
      Little stiff but much better now that I know what it's all about
      Just better no come back
      For that tingly strat was awful at my shack

      Delete
  10. I have to admit it cat, you've done a good job with this one. Maybe it's because you've been snip snipped and this is as close to dick as you'll ever come, spotted or otherwise.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi Anne,
      How r u? I am waiting to hear from you. How did it go?

      Delete
    2. haha I made you and Dez both praise me
      I guess spotted dick causes you both glee
      Hmmm I won't go there
      And just nod and agree at my lair..haha

      To many questions all at once for Anne
      Don't you know she needs a plan
      And can only answer one at a time
      To many and she may mame a mime

      Delete
    3. Oh my gosh! What in the world is going on over here?? First Dez, now Anne. Is the end o' times near?

      Delete
    4. Yeah I guess they don't want the cat to attack
      And really blow up their alliance shack

      Delete
    5. The surgery is scheduled for May 22nd, we just heard a few minutes ago. It's a real relieve to get that part settled


      @Elsie The cat will get his comeuppance soon enough. I can afford to be nice for one day.

      Delete
    6. oh, that's next week, my dear. I'm glad that you now at least know the date.

      @Elsie
      this is just a way to soften the cat up so he won't know what hit him when we launch the attack.

      Delete
    7. That is good that you got that part all done
      I'll send some good vibes your way as I'm flying back into the sun

      The cat will never get a thing
      For he rules all at his wing

      Delete
    8. @ Anne - I'm so glad the surgery is coming up. What a relief.

      Good idea tricking the cat with your sugary sweetness!!

      Delete
    9. yep, see how he talks about flying and wings, he's already turned into a chicken :)

      Delete
    10. I would rather eat the chicken at my sea
      Then every turn into one and fly free

      Delete
  11. That's something I prefer not to eat

    I wouldn't consider it a treat

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. No surely not a treat
      Rather look at zombie feet

      Delete
  12. Spotted dick? Which shop exactly? Oh my, this is disturbing in all levels.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. It's all over Britian I guess
      But I would never eat such a mess
      Although the viking woman likes to chow down on a few
      When her trash can lids come off showing all her glory in your view

      Delete
    2. Spotted dick and pompous twits. that describes about 90% of the population in England.

      Delete
    3. LMAO hmmmm you really don't like the english I say
      They better stay away

      Delete
  13. I wish I could see a whole bunch of nuns eating spotted dick.

    By the way this is really dirty if you don't know what spotted dick is and instead thing its a Dr. Suess characters-----!!!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. LMAO yes that would be a sight to see
      And cause glee
      hahahaha yeah many parents might get offended by it
      If I made it a kids book from my pit

      Delete
  14. Forget the name spotted dick...it's sponge pudding?? Oh my!! Nope, that would never make it past my lips!! Bleh, gag, barf!! What is sponge pudding?!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. LMAO I agree in every way
      Would not be a food I'd try at my bay
      Just the name curls my toes
      And sponge pudding, maybe God only knows
      As if you don't know the food
      It must be rather crude..haha

      Delete
  15. This is hilarious, a Spotted Dick!
    I'd rather just give it a flick
    Would throw up just thinking about it
    Wasted efforts, not taken up one bit

    Hank

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. LMAO I would throw up too
      As soon as it came into view
      Could not eat it at all
      And chuck it down the hall

      Delete
  16. As delightful and grand as it sounds, I think I'll pass on the spotted dick.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. LOL probably a good choice to make
      Not something in which I would want to partake

      Delete
  17. I guess I can't say much. I just wrote a complaint about mustard on burgers..but let me rant and rave anyway. They also have bangers and mash...they serve eggs over baked beans...so sponge pudding called spotted dick doesn't surprise me. I'm just glad they don't put mustard on it LMAO

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Well as daydreamer said below
      Here at my show
      They put custard on it
      So is that like mustard any bit?.lol
      It doesn't surprise me much either at my hall
      But the cat still have to give it a call
      And maybe mustard does work well
      For some may think adding it is swell

      Delete
    2. well every dick does need a lubricant.....

      Delete
    3. Really had to go there?
      At my lair..haha

      Delete
    4. After Dez's comment, I have nothing to add LMAO!!!! =)))

      Delete
    5. You lost for words
      Hmph must have fly to coup with the birds

      Delete
    6. me just says what everybody thinks, but doesn't have the guts to say :)

      Delete
    7. I suppose that is true
      But the cat will say anything he wishes and put it out there to view

      Delete
    8. oh my and oh dear...

      lol...

      Delete
    9. Geez two saying out of you
      Dez must really want to turn you blue

      Delete
    10. he's left me speechless
      I can't even rhyme.
      lol.

      Delete
    11. hahaha damn first a slurpy tongue
      And now your rhyming bell has rung

      Delete
    12. Really lost for words
      You need to go get some inspiration from the birds

      Delete
  18. Spotted dick was invented as a cheap sponge pudding LONG before anyone in the UK ever used the word dick in connection with a certain body part. LOLOL That's why it's always been called that because it was so named first! It is delicious with warm custard on it. :)
    Nice one Pat!
    Lets hear it for Spotted Dicks LOLOL

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. LOL never using the word dick with a body part
      That is like never having a walmart
      Hasn't been the case much for me
      As I have always heard it at my sea
      Warm custard on it just sounds bad
      Makes it sound even more disurbing to this lad..haha

      Delete
  19. Spotted dick? Next thing you know you'll be asking me to smoke a fag.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. LOL well why not do both at the same time
      Or inbetween drags as that would be sublime

      Delete
  20. Last time I tried to feed my spotted dick to a nun, I got 90 days in jail. Apparently she has to be "willing."

    Also, we'd love to be a part of your next story, whenever that may be. Keep us posted, and also, if you need anything from us, drop us a line!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. LOL or maybe it wasn't thrilling
      Or you didn't have top billing hahaha
      Sounds like a plan
      You will join the clan
      Or the next one
      When it is spun

      Delete
  21. feed it to a nun...smiles...we don't have spotted dick over here in germany..but i know no nun anyway who i could feed it to...smiles

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. hahaha I can ship you a nun
      If you want to try such fun

      Delete
  22. OMG! Spotted Dick, my Mum's favourite. How is that such an inappropriate thing to say?!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I don't know why people think it is such a mean thing to say
      Can eat some spotted dick all day

      Delete
  23. I never heard about this stuff before!! and that name spotted dick:(

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. See now you need to make some at your place
      And show a recipe to makes one heart race
      Oh dear
      Could cause fear

      Delete
    2. You know you want to make one
      Oh dear if be such fun

      Delete
  24. Oh, those naughty English with their Spotted Dick! Bubble and squeak is also a popular pub dish, but I am more of a Treacle Tart person myself. Such very very funny write, Pat!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. haha at least that sounds better than spotted dick
      Not sure how such a name was able to stick

      Delete
  25. This is the funniest thing ever!

    ReplyDelete
  26. lol. ROFL. I think I'll pass. lol Don't know why but I couldn't help thinking of that Jack black movie where he invented this product that evaporated poo. Love the info-mercial-esque feel and flow to your spotted dick rhyming show. D'verse indeed, and I am sure those hicks would be confused, that line was classic.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. hahaha yeah the hicks would do things I don't want to know
      If spotted dicks were to show
      I think you are right to take a pass
      And that be no fun to have the poo evaporated from my little rhyming ass
      I need it to show
      So it I can throw..haha

      Delete
  27. There's only one thing spotted dick makes me do...
    Run to the doctor for some penicillin!!!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. haha yeah that would be cause for alarm
      As it could really do harm

      Delete
  28. .. and I swim on a not sinking island--- ;-)

    ha ho!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Well it may still sink
      And bring you to the brink

      Delete
  29. Hahahahahahaha.... enough said.

    Now put that thing to bed!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. haha sure that is enough said
      Don't let it go to your head

      Delete
  30. Hahahaha, I always did think spotted dick was a hilarious name for a pudding.
    "Get it by the penny,
    Get it by the pound"
    Nice touch, gives the poem a bit of a British nursery rhyme feel.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yeah I rifted on the in for a penny in for a pound
      Figured it worked well and gave it a go this round

      Delete
  31. i have a spotty sausage dog called "Dick"... he likes cats! :D

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Glad he likes cats at his sea
      Even though that name might make him flee

      Delete
  32. I enjoyed the rhymes a lot today, Pat; but have no interest in the product. LOL.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. hahaha yeah I agree with you
      As the name just makes it seem so ewww

      Delete
  33. Spotted dick haha nice I'f I ever see one of those at the supermarket I'll probably pick one up just for fun... now idk about eating it

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. hahaha yeah be funny to have a can in the cupboard for fun
      Sure that would make guests run

      Delete
  34. i'm sure my dogs would like this right out of the cat i mean the can


    radiation rampage

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Out of the cat
      Only comes shii err it I mean strat

      Delete
  35. Okay, the cat can even rhyme about Spotted Dick and still make a seriously awesome post, this stuff is amazing Pat, well done as always, it really made me laugh.

    I have a serious question for other readers of this because I really wonder how anyone can follow you and not help read all of the awesome rhymes you write, everyone who skim reads your posts and leaves a comment pretending to have read really are missing out, I wouldn't lie!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yeah such fun to do
      As I laughed all the way through
      As I wrote it up
      And the cat can rhyme anything without a hiccup
      Well R is the main one that does that
      Most other read at my mat
      Besides maybe penguin man
      And those other spammers that can go to the trash can
      Like a few here and there
      R wannabes at my lair..haha

      Delete
    2. I kind of want to be as cool as R is haha, maybe I should start being lazy in commenting!

      Delete
    3. Well then you'd get made fun of galore
      Here at my shore

      Delete
  36. I never knew you could get it in a can...i must go and buy some

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. haha go right ahead
      Show it off and bring others dread

      Delete
  37. I prefer Treacle sponge and custard.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. At least it sounds better than the dick
      So might not be as ick

      Delete
    2. There was a race car driver long ago whose name was Dick Trickle. Seriously...not a stage name, either. What was HIS mother thinking? Oh dear. lol...

      Delete
    3. LOL she must have been high from the drugs afterwords or something like that
      To ever name him such a thing at her mat

      Delete
  38. Funny...and I am speechless :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. haha leaving on speechless is great
      Such a fun fate

      Delete
  39. OMG! What the heck was Heinz thinking to name a product, Spotted Dick. LOL!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. hahaha I guess they weren't thinking
      Or in a bottle someone was sinking

      Delete
  40. I really think you should eat your spotted dick with some toad in a hole --I mean THE hole.

    While you're there, share a dog on a stick-good for the soul (so I'm told.) k.

    I'm not sure this is such a good one for the children's books. K.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. That sounds nasty too
      Right after you
      The dog on a stick
      To me is ick
      And yeah won't use it for the kiddie lane
      As many would pop a vein

      Delete
  41. Spotted dick certainly doesn't sound very yummy...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Not something I want in my tummy
      Sounds like it came from a mummy

      Delete
  42. worst name for a food, ever.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. haha yeah not very clever
      And I'd eat it never

      Delete
  43. Perhaps the can is the best place for this product. Wonderful fun rhyming for a truly unfortunate reality, Pat.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yeah the can is the best place indeed
      Once the label you read

      Delete
  44. the t-shirt would have been perfect without the image of the actual spotted dick :p

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. haha but the image had to come
      After I gave it a hum

      Delete
  45. Brillianr Pat. My mother made the best spotted-dick in the world. Bet loads of us have nostalgic memories of youthful foods.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Not sure it's something I could ever eat
      But glad it was a treat
      And yeah many can remember through food
      Although most have names some might not find rude

      Delete
  46. Ha, i would never eat anything with the word dick in the title, well maybe if it was a life and death situation in a jail cell. YOu should write jingles PAT, age restricted of course. . If you got to a park at the wrong time of night you can spot dick, or turn on the tv and you can see some dicks talking about politics, not sure if they have spots though. Very funny poem.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. LOL yes dicks of all kinds are everywhere
      Some not so rare
      Others think they are big and brave
      As they give a cocky wave
      Writing jingles would be fun
      Not sure how that gets done
      But the cat could surely do that
      Whether kiddie or adult at his mat

      Delete
  47. pudding that is sponge
    maybe the cat will lunge
    no more on the shelves
    we'll just help ourselves
    spotted dick is a new trick
    he'll be gone with a good hard flick

    ...never heard of this produce before. what a riot:)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yeah you bring that here
      And the cat would have fear
      Glad I taught something new
      For you to view
      Give it a try
      Spotted dick might be good with a french fry

      Delete
  48. This can of spotted dick
    I swear, it cannot be beat
    Reminds me of something sick
    So I promise never to eat

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yes I promise never to eat as well
      For it would be nasty as hell

      Delete
  49. You know I've seen Spotted Dick in the store, but I must admit it doesn't look all that appetizing. However, this poem may have just changed the way I look at Spotted Dick forever. Though I will also forever chuckle at the words Spotted Dick because I am a perpetual youth.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yes I will forever chuckle at them too
      As I am quite immature at such things at my zoo
      But it is too fun to pass up
      So I rhymed as I drink from my cup

      Delete