Monday, May 14, 2012

Island Of The Gawker Part Ten Part Two Could Home Finally Come Due?

Petsy sent out a call and from out of nowhere birds began dropping animals from her hall. Blabber's tarsier stood in front of the crew ready to lead them when Petsy's call came due. Up from the ground came that L shaped hail we saw earlier in the cave and she continued to rant and rave.

"No earth is an island. The magic you seek is there, believe and the island can be earth."

"Yes, we get it. We are on another planet already. We're past that part."

"Oh! Well then let's kick these hooligans off this peak."

"This is just great. Not only does Drazin have to work with two fleabags, a guy whose lost his mind, a hair nutcase, a dumb Irish woman and an animal hoarder. But now Drazin gets to work with an L and an R. Why not bring in the whole damn alphabet? Great! Now what? Oh him too!"

Flying from below came Bersercules with his apes, they were even wearing capes. I guess they used the trees as slingshots to get them up here and they too wanted to carve The Gawker a new rear. This had become one crowded peak there was not even enough room to take a leak. But this is where it would end as we were going to send The Gawker around the bend. I told all it was sad but true that if we wanted to win we would have to join Blabber and Pat with their crazy view.

Petsy sounded the call and the horde of animals followed tarsier through The Gawker's hall. She did not seem stunned one bit and even used her numb tongue fit. For it was really eww but she took out many of The Gawker's crew, as she stretched her tongue from her head, whacking the glowy eyed freaks and causing them dread. They seemed to freeze upon her huge frog like tongues touch and The Gawker did not like that too much.

Drazin let his eyes glow and laser beams began to show. He cut through many with ease as I simply used my fleas. They grew five feet tall and stomped forth into The Gawker's hall. Miss Priss used her tail to send strains of fur flying, they were so sharp those glowy eyed freaks were surely dying. Irish Air opened her mouth and an echo of drums came out. It was such a loud shout that the glowy eyed freaks disinegrated on sight. Whoever she aimed her mouth at went not so quietly into that good night.

Blabber spun her hair and blocked anything that came our way sending it back at them and causing them dismay. While Pat used it as a shield and shot all with his finger when they would not yield. Besercules turned into a giant ape and ripped his poor cape. He stomped the glowy eyed freaks like King Kong. Some how him with no pants was just wrong. L used her hail to create a noose and wrapped herself around the neck of each glowy eyed freak making their head pop loose. R still floated like a nut stuck in a rut.

The Blue Guy would not give in and did his slot spin. It seemed Besercules lost his feet and fell over the edge of the peak, hitting the ground and creating an image that was not so neat. The apes retreated hoping to save their master and the glowy eyed freaks came at us faster. But they were met with the same until The Gawker popped his eye ball out ready to mame. For he caught L off guard and she became fully gawked, now part of his bard. She wrapped her self around Irish Air's neck good and tight, forcing her to go toward the light.

The Penguin Man was taking out Petsy's animals one by one finding it tons of fun. Dictionary Collector snuck up on Blabber and grabbed her hair, holding her by it in the air while he gave Pat a book and caused many new voices to go into his brain nook. The Gawker had Miss Priss and I pinned against the wall and Petsy could no longer send out the call. For Grammar Nazi had run her down, zooming back and forth in his glowy eyed freak gown.

Drazin on the other hand was fighting The Blue Guy's attack of the slot as he really wanted to make him rot. Drazin marched toward him and The Blue Guy's smirk turned to something more grim, as Drazin grabbed him by his spiky hair and shouted over to Irish Air.

"Drazin knows the damn Irish have more fight in them than that. Stop being some damn wanker and get that damn alphabet thing from around your neck."

It seems Drazin pissed Irish Air off enough that she got rough. She bit the L shaped lasso around her and even as her eyes started to blur, latched onto L and damned her to Hell. Then gave her drum deafening shout and L's top popped off like the head of a trout. Irish Air tossed the remaining part to Drazin and he latched onto The Blue Guys head like he was crushing a raisin. He then wrapped what was left of L around his neck in a noose and hung The Blue Man like nothing more than a stuffed goose. His lights went out as Drazin told him to rot but as they did his eyes told Drazin he had hit the jackpot.

Pat finally got wise to the book and used the magic of The Gawker's nook. He made a whole pile appear over the Dictionary Collectors head and pointed up into the air making Dictionary Collector loosen his grip on Blabber's hair. She spun her hair as the Dictionary Collector thought he dodged Pat's book affair. But thas was a mistake as Blabber's hair send the pile of books at him like she was blowing nothing more than a snow flake. The Dictionary Collector could be heard screaming as he fell off the cliff. I guess being crushed by his own books left him in quite the tiff.

Petsy slurped on Grammar Nazi's arm and finally freed herself from harm. She made his arm go numb and them slurped him from head to bum. Grammar Nazi could not move one bit and Petsy wanted to give him a taste of his own hit and run fit. So she used the magic the best she could and brought forth a car made of wood. It was enough to do the trick for let's just say what was left of Grammar Nazi was kind of ick.

Penguin Man had his hands full with the animal crew but he was tossing them off the cliff and did not have a clue. For while the others were keeping him occupied, Blabber's tarsier was preparing to turn the tide. He set up a slippery patch of animal poo which the animals lured Penguin Man into. He got some on his glowy eyed freak attire and then the tarsier lit him on fire. It gave a whole new meaning to dog poo in a bag as Penguin Man burnt to a crisp like an old rag.

After all of that it was down to The Gawker, Miss Priss and The Cat. We had taken many before at our shore and this time we would beat on him like he was some bad mime. For he retracted his eye once more but Miss Priss jumped to his head and held open the door. I jumped up and swated at the eye but it seemed to be protected no matter which way I gave it a try. My five foot fleas surround him and Miss Priss used her sharp hairs to give his mohawk a trim. Then I darted off to Blabber and snatched her horn, of course she got mad that her necklace was torn. But I jumped back on The Gawker and stabbed his huge eye and I am glad to report a simple horn is what made The Gawker die. No matter if Gawker Peak was ravaged and torn I beat The Gawker and had to toot my own horn. I know that was a bad pun but it was fun.

Finally with all beaten back we were ready to go back to our shack. We surrounded the magic pot and we hoped someone would connect a dot. For no one had any idea how to work it that is when R finally moved from his stationary spot and joined us with his usual bit.

"The power is nice."
"The power is great."
"The power is epic."
"The power is..."

"Drazin has had enough of you."
"You took away my shampoo."
"You took me from my zoo."
"You are a bloody eejit."
"You are too consistent. The best I got."
"You made me hang out with the godly mook."

And that was that. For nothing had to be said by The Cat. As I jumped up onto R and pushed him down far. The others all grabbed hold after R had been told and we shoved him into the pot telling R, just like The Blue Guy, The Gawker and the rest, he too could rot. That is what he gets for pretending to be Merlin and bringing us here, sadly his final words were nothing you wish to here.

"This is hot."
"This is warm."

But as he disappeared around us came a bright glowing storm. We all began to pull away assuming things would go back to the norm. Each gave an appreciative nod for as much as Miss Priss and I hated the god we had made it through. I hear Petsy finally made it back to her zoo. Irish Air's gardens surely grew in some mighty fine poo. Drazin continued to talk in his third person view and yes, Blabber finally got to wash her hair with two kinds of shampoo. Her pet tarsier even hitched a ride as we all left Gawker Island, or I guess that would be planet, with pride. Pat, Miss Priss and I will surely have more adventures come to pass. But for now I am just happy to be home to rest my little rhyming ass.

Experience spring, have a fling

111 comments:

  1. I can't be number 1 because I do not know what to say.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I guess it was just your lucky day
      As you were lost for words at my bay

      Delete
  2. Great conclusion to your Island of the Gawker series Pat, I loved how you guys ended up forming such a big crew of hearty warriors there wasn't even room left to have a pee haha, awesome rhymes buddy.

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    Replies
    1. Yeah the showdown was fun
      As all the Gawker's crew were done
      Even big R
      We boiled like he was put in tar

      Delete
  3. The gawker series is done??? I'm sad to see it go!!!! :'( At least we won and kicked serious butt!

    I cracked up reading that Petsy's power was a giant tongue!!! Bleh, gag, barf! hahahaha And I get my shampoo? Woo hoo!!!!!! Poor L didn't make it though!! Is that b/c she joined the alliance??? lol

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. It was a good run while it lasted and I am humbled to have even had a mention or two LOL

      He only gave you your shampoo back to keep you on his side =P

      Delete
    2. I know! I know! Couldn't I have just fed them so many cookies that they died? hahaha. A big numb stretchy tongue? LMAO. And that stuff with GN? I don't even know where to begin.

      I'm having trouble swallowing.
      lol.

      Delete
    3. LOL I cracked up also as I wrote her power
      Numb slurping beats cookes or a flower..haha
      Yep she joined the alliance so she was done
      I told her she would get it under the Gawker sun
      Actually it was already written that way
      And yeah the Island of the Gawker is over at my bay
      But I have other ideas as well
      And one day maybe we'll all go through some other type of hell
      Once more with no shampoo
      And your tarsier along to view

      LMAO well I need a minion or two
      So I had to give her, her shampoo
      And humbled you say
      hahaha I'll remember that at my bay

      hahahahahaha see I told you there was more to come
      From my little rhyming bum
      That might surprise you still
      Here at my rhyming hill
      And so I did that with ease
      As you numb tongue slurped all making them freeze
      hahahahaha too fun to pass up
      To swallow maybe take a drink from your coffee cup

      Delete
    4. LOL Poor Betsy won't be able to eat for weeks! Well, that's one way to get ready for bikini season!!! hahahaha

      Aw, poor L...It's ok. We still love you!

      I have to admit, I'm very happy with my shampoo and freshly washed hair!

      Delete
    5. Your hair smells so much better, Jax.

      And yeah, I'm going to be smokin in my bikini this summer...talk about a diet! ha. Besides, I just have to think of licking those thugs and my appetite goes away.
      hahahaha.

      Delete
    6. LMAO well see the cat is helping out in more than one way
      By giving such a display
      Made you happy with your shampoo
      And gave Betsy an easy way to not eat at her zoo
      Just think of licking
      And no food will be sticking hahahahaha
      L had to go
      That is what she gets for joining the alliance show

      Delete
  4. you might need a rest after that...tooting your own horn tooly dooo....sad to see the gawker go you know and glad some lived to see another day

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    Replies
    1. Yeah I know
      The Gawker had to go
      He was too mean
      And saw evertying even the obscene
      But I'm sure next time
      His alter ego will turn from a life of crime
      And be all grand
      Here in rhyme time land

      Delete
  5. I'm glad that's over as I'm still in trouble!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. hahaha bah never fear Irish Air
      She will never topple my lair

      Delete
  6. *sigh*

    I can't believe that all my ranting and raving didn't save my ass. I'll find a way to come back one day - watch yourself cat!!!

    =P


    **thanks for including me, Pat - it was fun

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    Replies
    1. the Alliance will strike back, Elsy, and we shall destroy this ebil feline bard and hit him real hard.

      Delete
    2. Thank you Dez! Thank you for honoring my death with such nobility! I knew I could count on the Alliance and could never trust a cat and it's fleas.

      Delete
    3. your death? Those are just ebil cat's illusions, as far as me knows you is in the Alliance situation room scheming and plotting with the penguins on our next move against the feline nemesis.

      Delete
    4. The cat does suffer many illusions from licking it's arse so often and playing in it's litter box...perhaps L is safe and sound after all.....hmmmm

      Delete
    5. The cat suffers nothing of the sort
      There you lay at Gawker court
      All strained out from hanging the blue guy
      At least you made him die
      So don't cry
      I'm sure the next time you won't fry
      As I have another idea to give a go
      Here at my show
      Not sure what form it will take though
      As I may have to give some feedback a go
      And the best answers will be used
      For the next tale that is infused
      So have your mind ready
      And you may live good and steady
      As for the penguin man
      He will always die for the cat is not a fan..haha

      Delete
    6. don't sprain your brain, cat, we're not reading your tales anyway, we're just pretending we do since we feel sorry for you :P

      Delete
    7. I'm glad to know I'm just resting after kicking some butt. But, wait...feedback...you're open to suggestions for your next gawker series, huh? hahaha =P

      Delete
    8. The elves are nothing but a pain
      So they go get run over by a train
      Pretend that
      When you are flat..haha

      Oh there will be suggestions to come
      In a post by my little rhyming bum

      Delete
    9. Annzie will go mad when she hears you're threatening me with trains now, as if being hit by your car wasn't enough...

      Delete
    10. haha Annzie isn't here
      So I have no fear
      Not that I did before
      When she was at my shore

      Delete
  7. Great post and nice story as usual, thanks for sharing this with us!

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    Replies
    1. R!
      You were the star!
      Did you catch that
      with your 13 word rant?

      Delete
    2. R is like me, Petsy, he never reads ebil cat's rants. We just pretend we do.... it's healthier.

      Delete
    3. I'm beginning to think that's true. Maybe R is for robot. I bet if Pat put on that word verification thing, R couldn't do it. lol.

      Delete
    4. One word off from his record too
      And yeah I think he is out to lunch with his view
      Then again who knows
      As R always shows
      Wonder what would happen with the WV on
      Bah, I hate that crap too much to use it at my lawn

      Delete
    5. This seriously cracks me up.

      Delete
    6. LOL Poor R!! For all we know, he/she could be one of our cousins ;) hahaha

      Delete
    7. hahaha all like R
      From near and far
      He/she could be related to someone
      If it is one of mine it's time to run
      And no R does not = Pat
      Or the cat

      Delete
  8. what the hell? Me is throwing poor animals off the cliff? You is ebil ebil ebil! I'd rather throw myself off the cliff than hurt an animal. Although I can't guarantee I wouldn't hurt a certain car right now!

    Apes in capes - positively stylish.
    I wish your stories used at least some extent of reality in them, ebil cat.

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    Replies
    1. At least you didn't lick people to death.

      Delete
    2. the ebil cat really hates you, Petsy, for becoming our Undergoddess, he feels it is his natural right to rule the world of underwear.... which is strange, since I know for a fact that he never wears it...

      Delete
    3. LMAO well you were turned evil by the Gawker
      So it isn't much of a shocker
      Plus you got full of poo
      So that made revenge come due
      You would hurt a car?
      Hmmm what's the matter did take you very far?..haha
      Reality is no fun
      You want that go out into the sun
      There you go
      Reality at your show

      LMAO I'm still laughing over that
      Such fun to the cat

      Yeah but underwear is big money
      And the cat might need them if things get umm runny

      Delete
    4. that's just nasty, cat, stay away from rotten tuna and strange smelling cans! I'm not changing your diapers if the situation happens...

      Delete
    5. Bah the cat will just go on the floor
      And move off to explore

      Delete
    6. oh, my dear Penguin Lord, how did I end up in this comment line?

      Delete
    7. I guess you are just lucky
      Or like it umm plucky

      Delete
    8. Well, dear Dez. It looks like you are the one that started this comment line. hahaha.

      Delete
    9. He does bring about such awful things
      Must be those elven wings

      Delete
    10. I was really expecting him to weave a tale
      with those comments about my tongue on the trail.
      he could have had a lot of fun
      talking about that a ton.
      But fortunately he over looked that
      and you'll be on to the next post when he makes it back.
      And if GN had been back to see
      I would have had to run over you a time or three.
      hahahaha.

      Delete
    11. LOL I guess he was off his game
      Or decided to remain tame
      hahahaha too bad GN isn't about
      That would have been fun to just his shout

      Delete
  9. Gawker gawking for now is over
    Wonder what is there next in store
    I'm sure it's to be a good pick
    Going to be also another epic

    Hank

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yes I have more on my mind
      To come from my little rhyming behind
      But must give the long ones a rest
      As I put things to the test
      And then back they will come
      With a ho and a hum

      Delete
  10. Replies
    1. Yes sadly that is all
      And you will forever remained buried in the dirt of gawker hall..hahahahaha

      Delete
    2. Yes I know and you are so happy because Im buried???
      Always I know you let me buried:(

      Delete
    3. Oh poor Gloria!
      You'll have to cook up something with the earth worms down there and feed them to the cat. lol...

      Delete
    4. oh no Betsy I always cook for the people love me LOL

      habrase visto más que dejó enterrada! ha.ha

      Delete
    5. Gloria can journey to the center of the earth
      And show her cooking worth
      She the cat just did her a favor as well
      Now she can feed the people in the center of the earth isn't that swell?

      Delete
    6. Gloria you need to translate that line! haha.

      habrase has seen more than was buried?

      Delete
    7. I didn't even get it
      Stinkin spanish fit
      Blabber needs to teach me that
      So I can be a spanish rhyming cat..haha

      Delete
    8. I just asked google to translate
      as I only know how to count to ten in the spanish gate.
      lol.

      Delete
    9. haha I could have done that
      But I was a lazy cat..haha

      Delete
  11. Beware the apes wearing capes

    especially if they're throwing explosive grapes

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yeah that would suck
      And hurt like a umm pecking duck

      Delete
  12. "R still floated like a nut stuck in a rut" - Good one. Is R pretending or R is really R-(s)tar-, I dunno.
    Cat, I admit you have claws but seem to be rubber claws, good luck with that. I am happy to see alphabets taking on the ride and it is basic etiquette to not call the almighty as dumb when she isnt around.
    [I am lying, but I am happy you did because I cant wait for her to take you on and feed you to the apes with capes and you and your bipolar blue guy and shampoo weapons, ohh Pat..]
    Elsie - congrats on joining the crew. :)
    Pat,
    Do you want a comic from me, I would like to test my drawing skills. :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yeah who knows about R
      But he/she fried at my bar
      So all is good
      And as it should
      Bah the almighty doesn't scare me
      I'll drown her in the gawker sea
      All kinds of things came to be
      As I went quite far out of reality
      Elsie can join the alliance all she likes
      For they will still be ran over by kids on bikes
      A comic you say?
      Of a story at my bay?

      Delete
    2. I kind of want to see your comic about the cat!! Can you put the cat in a tutu? I've been trying for months, but he won't let me!!!

      Delete
    3. LMAO if a tutu is involved one bit
      Then I will get you and her back for it
      But if you want to give it a go
      Go for it about my show

      Delete
    4. @Jax
      Good idea. I was thinking more of superhero one but while Irish Air is out the responsibility could be on me to keep cat inside the bag or on his place :)

      @Pat
      I will complain about you to your viking woman, already she is angry with all your cheating with R. :)

      Delete
    5. The superhero idea works for me
      That would cause glee
      Just remember the cat can do payback
      And will take great delight in it at his shack
      The viking woman can bite me
      I'll cheat with R all I want at my sea

      Delete
    6. A tutu wearing superhero? See, that's compromise!!!

      P.S. Can the tutu be lilac? I would LOVE to see the cat in a lilac tutu!!! :0) :o)

      Delete
    7. maybe if you let him wear the zebra thong under the tutu? lol....

      Delete
    8. Ummm no!
      That would not flow
      Maybe if it were to glow
      Ummm nay still no!
      Miss Priss maybe
      But the cat never ever at his sea

      The zebra thong he could do though
      He'd let that show

      Delete
    9. I sent you both the PC-Pat Cat superhero with pringle powers. :)

      Delete
    10. haha yeah I saw it
      Payback will come in a bit..hahaha

      Delete
  13. This was a lot of fun to read. Can we expect another series with another cast of misfit bloggers? I'll bring the beer and the shame, you bring the rhymes and the dames?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Oh I have another series in mind
      That will come from my little rhyming behind
      If you want in
      Just let me know at my bin

      Delete
  14. Sounds like a happy ending,
    Glad everyone's still standing!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Well most are still standing this time
      Next time things may not end up so sublime

      Delete
  15. Thanks for sharing, I enjoyed reading it.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Glad yoiu enjoy at my sea
      Or at least you say so with glee

      Delete
  16. Poo? Shampoo? Zoo? What's a body to do! You're so nutty. This is fun stuff~ :o) <3

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yeah lots came due
      Some of which were quite eww
      And nutty is fun
      As it must be done

      Delete
  17. Finally the end to the epic saga, looking forward to the next one!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. we can only wish it's the end, but we're not of such luck...

      Delete
    2. LOL it is the end
      But there will be another that will one day come around the bend

      Delete
  18. What an ending, they should make this into a movie :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Would be nice if that were the case
      Some royalities would coe to my place

      Delete
  19. I agree with Baur - this would make a terrific movie! Julie

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Be fun to see
      A movie based off of something from bush number three

      Delete
  20. That was one wild story. I'm sad the series is over!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Oh there will be more
      For all to explore
      At some point
      Here at my joint

      Delete
  21. Your impersonation of R really cracks me up ~

    I don't think he even knew or read this Pat ~

    Well I am glad you are home after that journey

    Cheers to more parts, and warm spring days :-)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yeah warm spring days would be nice
      So the cat can chase mice
      And yeah R doesn't get it
      As he doesn't read one bit

      Delete
  22. I admit I was a tad bit lost.
    Not visiting every day has its cost.
    A series is nothing if I'm not there from the beginning.
    But from the look of things, I'd say you're winning!

    I can't help but wonder if I was part of the cast?
    Getting roasted by the cat's rhyming ass!
    Next series I will be sure to stay up to date.
    I guess I owe that much to a hell of a blogging mate! :-)

    you can let B&B bring the beer but I think I got the shame! lol

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. No you didn't get blasted in this one
      Although that would have be fun
      Those that say something about them usually popped in my mind first
      As they give their usual burst
      But next one I'll give you a go
      Letting the shame flow
      As I already have the idea for it
      And I'm sure you'll be a hit
      Maybe a bad guy
      That might make others fry

      Delete
    2. Can't wait to see what you have in mind!
      And that cat is still scheming on that blog of mine!
      My posts are few and far between.
      But rest assured, the cat will be seen!

      Delete
    3. Oh I've got most of it planned out
      Just need to find time to give it a shout
      And write it all down
      Here in my crazy town
      The cat will rule the wall
      Or make it fall

      Delete
  23. Ah the end of the tale, and I get crushed by a pile of books…not the first time either lol Great tale, but now the cats going to have to deal with all that's changed at his mat, gone so long something strange must have come due, with Tarsiers and the like running court upon that zoo, perhaps in an odd way the Gawker won, but nope, that can never happen, not while that cat still has his rhyming tongue. Fun story, whenever I read pieces that extended over many days, I always worry that the ending won't live up to the time it takes to get to such a place, but this one lived up more than fine. Thanks

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Glad it lived up just fine
      And was divine
      As I always try and know the ending before I start
      So that way it doesn't fade out like a fart
      And stink to high heaven
      After part seven
      I'm sure the cat's shore is safe from most
      As after all, he is the host..haha

      Delete
  24. And they all lived happily ever after. The End. (About darn time, too!)

    Very cool about the freaky tongue verses the freaky eyeballs. I'll take freaky tongue over freaky eyeballs any day!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. LOL freaky slurping tongue is fun
      Betsy will like hearing that one..lol
      About time you say
      Hmm have to get another going at my bay

      Delete
  25. That's a load of excitement that's come to pass.
    You've earned a rest for your little rhyming ass.

    xoRobyn

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yes the rest is needed at my sea
      For all three

      Delete
  26. Whoa, since when did Bersecules become the Monkey King? I think it's time for me to reread some of the earlier entries. :P

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Besercules was the monkey king in part two
      And then a few other times he came due

      Delete
  27. I need a cape. Because they touched my spikey hair. Can't have anyone touching the hair!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Well if your alter ego is dead
      Does it matter if they touched the hair on your head?..haha

      Delete
  28. i'll have to read the back issues of my man the gawker
    the cat is wise and quiet; big r is the talker
    i'll take that car made of wood and have a look under the hood
    return of vern is what i'll be looking for with that eyeball
    the cat can ride off into the sunset with you in the sidecar

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I think that be scary in every way
      Pat would prob walk at our bay
      Then let the cat drive
      Not sure we'd make it out alive..haha

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  29. Over with? Oh no!!
    It was quite a tale
    (or perhaps 'tail.')

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    Replies
    1. There wil be another tail
      That I will give a wail

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