Ever get something that is a pain and makes you want to pop a vein? I mean by opening the thing up with the stupid wrapper causing a hiccup. You stab it and yank it and stab it some more. That plastic makes it seem like something of lore. Really annoying I must say. I guess they want to make you work for it at your bay.
Your pretty item is in the mail,
You get it and give a wail.
Want to see it right away.
But then you are caused dismay.
The thing is stuck,
What the duck?
This plastic is worse than super glue.
And all you can do is view.
Stabbing it comes to mind,
You grab the first thing you can find.
So and take your pen,
Stabbing it at your den.
Oops, the pen broke,
Now ink is making you choke.
But you will not give up,
As you knock down your coffee cup.
Smash! It breaks to pieces on the floor.
Adding another chore.
But screw that for now.
Could be a blessing some how.
You take the biggest piece of glass,
And stab it in mass.
Oops! You cut yourself some,
Now you swear the thing is dumb.
But it will not win.
You bash it with a tin.
A frying pan too,
And drown it in the loo.
Bleach the thing to melt it off,
As you continue to scoff.
You finally get wise,
Hauling out scissors on the rather large size.
You go to chop the thing,
And the two halfs fling.
Meaning the scissors break in two.
Now whatever will you do?
Smash it with a hammer,
For causing such a clamor?
Then that would signal defeat.
And you will not be beat.
So you stamp return to sender,
Saying it was put through a blender.
And wait for your replacement one.
Declaring this time such a tail will not be spun.
Until it is once more,
As the plastic gives an encore.
If only it was made of rubber,
Or at least could amuse and dance like Flubber.
Now was that not dVerse? For that plastic crap can make one curse. A chop here and a chop there and all you can do is stare. For the thing won't open with ease and is such a tease. But if you stab it just right your item will see the light. By then you are too tired to care and you know it is not that rare. All a ploy to cause sass so all will hear of the product including my little rhyming ass.
Experience spring, have a fling.