Friday, November 30, 2012

Some Holiday Glee With Lots Free!

So the cat got another story on the go,
With his typical rhyming flow,
And it is published in the anthology above.
The cover even gives Elisa's legs some love.

And any profit for the next 20 days,
Will go to Primary Children's Hospital's bays,
In the form of gifts.
Spirits will get lifts.

I can ignore the germs for that,
Which are all over the hospital mat.
Right, let's not go there.
And it's free from Dec 2-4 at Amazon's lair.

But this is a book fair,
So the cat will have to add a pair.
Hell, let's go really out to lunch,
And add a whole bunch.

So give the above a spin.
For they are all free at my bin.
And now all can see,
What comes from Pat and me.

Time traveling in a cat.
Actually that idea gets squashed flat.
As the zombies and others come into play,
Actually that get squashed flat too on display.

But at least they go to Hell.
That too has a twist that is swell.
And of course gods come into play,
Which too have more to their godly way.

Then there is the cat,
And Cassie at our mat.
She has to put up with me,
As I gloat with glee.

Of course we can't neglect,
The final one you can detect.
For pirates come galore,
As One Shoe Kangaroo is in store.

And now you can have fun with lots free under my sun. One can go and download away and read on their Kindle or computer those on display. Of course you can be nice too and leave a review. But the cat will still cause you sass, as always from my little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Thursday, November 29, 2012

Causing The Back Some Unwanted Flack!

You act all tame and smile with a wave.
Searching for blame, it's info you crave.
Shoving your nose where it doesn't belong.
Cackling like crows chowing on a ding dong.

Knee jiggling with delight as they leave.
When out of sight you bob and weave.
Have you heard this? Have you heard that?
Acting like it's bliss while being an annoying gnat.

Finding out more which you'll never tell.
Pace up and down the floor clutching your cell.
Speed typing the news to those unaware.
Away your paws cruise like a dirty old mare.

Sneeking off at the drop of a ring.
A fake cough is all that you sling.
Like a canary your flutter and sing.
Without even a stutter you let the news fling.

So much for your word and worth.
You sung like a bird and it's all over earth.
In like a gust you sit beginning to fiddle,
But your info lust puts you back in the middle.

The typing you stop and perk up your ear.
For a new gossip crop has been heard near.
Back on the phone you go with a dash.
By your tone you sound worse than trailer park trash.

But oh no, never ever you.
You simply glow with your perky view.
Your trusting eyes would never lie.
Until all are no longer wise then off you fly.

What's this more news one wishes to share?
You have the blues and something you can't bare?
Tell little old me and all will be fine.
Even with crossed knee my word is divine.

That is a big deal and no one will know.
Don't worry we had a deal and your secret I won't blow.
Until you leave my sight and no longer linger.
Then your plight will be texted out with my rapid finger.

What? It surely wasn't me that spread that.
You are a nut. I'm no dirty rat.
The info spread around was fake?
I swear what I read was how to bake a cake.

The cat or rather Pat watches each day as a certain person listens to whatever one has to say. Pretending she would never tell and then off the person goes with their cell. So for a little fun some miss information was spun. This person got what they deserve from Pat's little info swerve. So fun to stir up shit especially when gossip hounds deserve it. Hate nosey old bats. Yes, they even bother cats. The person sure got some sass which was such fun to cause by my little rhying ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Wednesday, November 28, 2012

Thrown For A Loop With The Bloop!

So what is the bloop?
Something from Goof Troop?
Nope, it was a sound,
That was rather profound.

In the summer of 1997,
The NOAA which I won't leaven,
Recorded a frequency form the deep,
Of the Pacific Ocean keep.

All man made objects were ruled out,
And supposedly did not create this shout.
Even geological sounds were crossed off,
And it certaintly wasn't a cat cough.

It was a sound,
That was so profound.
That is was several times louder,
Coming off more prouder,
Than the loudest known biological sound ever.
Which makes it for quite the interesting endeavor.
Many have said it was a giant sea monsters noise,
Who knows if it was sobbing or calling out joys.

But to go along with that,
Is the spot where it was heard in the Pacific mat.
It is roughly the same place,
Where H.P. Lovecraft said R'lyeh was the case.

And another little fact,
Is both R'lyen and this sound act,
Are at the Pacific pole of inaccessibility in the ocean.
So it would be hard for anyone to find the commotion.

And the perfect spot for a creature to hide,
Where it and the land mass of R'lyen were said to collide.
The beast was said to be caged down there.
But who knows if it was kept at bay in such a lair.

So there is another little tidbit for today.
A sea creature very well could live far far away.
One louder than any known to man,
And one who would surely make you kick the can.

Avoid such a mass,
Whether lad or lass,
Or you could be through,
Making you giant sea creature stew.

The cat found this bloop the other day and had to give it a go at his bay. Sounds much meaner than Nessie too. I would not want this near my zoo. Now another lesson has come due class and that is all from my little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Tuesday, November 27, 2012

For A dVerse Buck You Get A Great Big Suck!

So the cat needs to give you humans some lip for this dVerse trip. You need to get your act together and stop changing your minds like the weather. Or maybe just stop lying but that might cause many a brain to end up frying.

The cat sees the news,
Stating it can't lose.
This will be the movie of the year.
Turns out it is something to fear.

Oh look it's Resident Evil 6.
That game will be in all top picks.
Turns out it's trash,
Leaving you with a bad rash.

Sure there is the odd nut,
That will like such things at their hut.
Opinions are assholes I suppose.
Wait! Is that how that goes?

But when the majority claim,
It will be something of fame,
Then the movie or game,
Turns out to be oh so lame,

To all who cried out for it,
Giving them a big fit.
Seems there is something to it.
Maybe they didn't add enough spit?

Or too much polish and shine,
Making it less than divine.
Goes for anything though,
That can curl your toes.

Next big thing just flopped,
That has to sting that it dropped.
Maybe the anticipation is to high?
But some things at least get a good cry.

Not totally sucky as hell,
And end up being swell.
Maybe they know it will suck,
And give off some "it will be grand" cluck.

That way they can sell it before all know,
And realize their lying flow.
Does this bring us back to greed?
Just them planting the seed,

When they know it is trash,
And will be over in a flash.
All kinds of questions arise,
But a word to the wise.

Tell the hype to pound sand,
For protesting too much and making such a stand,
Usually only means one thing,
In the trash you'll want to give it a fling.

There we go the cat has stirred up some strat at his show and now all can think. I hope I did not bring you to the brink. Actually that might be fun. So if it was done, don't blame the cat, we'll blame this one on Pat. Or maybe Cass because it certainly can't be blamed on my hyped up little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Monday, November 26, 2012

Taking The Title To Heart And Making It Art!

So the cat has done movies by the ton but I have not given the future ones a run. The ones that will come years down the road. But now I will spoil them for you and give you them by the bucket load.

There will be Godzilla Vs. Eggman
Followed by Attack of the Deranged Fan.
Next will come Mommy I Saw Santa's Bum.
Leading to Super Cramps from a Plum.

Frankenstein Meets The Fockers,
What Girls Keep In Their Lockers.
Scooby Doo and the Killer Butterfly.
How To Make Babies Cry.

Stupid and Stupider will show.
Who Stole My Ding Dong? will hit a new low.
I Saw Saw will be scene.
Writing With Body Parts will be obscene.

Drowning Monkeys For Fun.
Attack of the Aliens from the Sun.
Why Playdoh Made Me Kill.
How Sally Got Her Thrill.

Waking Up will put you to sleep.
Just as much as Slippery Heroes of the Deep.
Gust of the Wind will inspire.
As will Singed By Fire.

This Film Isn't About Money.
99 Things To Do With Honey.
It Was The One Eared Man.
The Second Attack From A Deranged Fan.

Clobber The Vendor will rise.
Unlike Nature's Weirdest Cries.
Lying will take place in I Tell No Lies.
But all will boo hoo watching the Death of French Fries.

Clapping Makes Your Hands Sore.
Bigfoot's Deadly Gore.
The Hinge Popped Off.
Triakporlakotusisus: The Deadly Cough.

I guess I failed at I'll Never Tell.
Not as much as Underwear to Take to Hell.
Gypsies Cursed My Neighbor will fail.
Along with Zeus Struck Me Down with Hail.

Swinging With Mr. Grubber.
I Should Have Wore a Rubber.
Lethal Dimes That Curse.
Purple Nurples Are Diverse.

Clearly You Get The Point.
The Man With One Joint.
Are We Having Fun Yet?
Fluffy The Talking Pet.

Do You Like My Powers?
Revenge of the Flowers.
Knowledge in Full Bloom.
Brings forth Doom and Gloom.

Now don't you just want to hyperventilate into a bag? Or burn down Hollywood with a rag? Either way I suppose such a view would really bother you. Funny part is I bet half will come and you'll curse my little rhyming bum. But the retread is something they can't help but do. For they have no balls to bring us something new. I guess they are snip snip as well. I hope it hurt like hell. Now I have shown you the future movie world in mass. So you can prepare thanks to my little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Sunday, November 25, 2012

You Had To Know This Would Show!

So dVerse is talking about preparation and Brian already stole the H cremation. So the cat will go ahead a bit to prepare for the rantings of some BIG twit.

The groceries are half gone,
With the approaching dawn.
The water is low,
No generator at my show.

The gas tank is almost bare,
The tp I continue to tear.
Still no idea how to do this or that,
Have not even stocked up on rat.

Not even tons of books to view.
Or even a game or two,
Like Clue,
Which many seriously need to come due.

But I did a ton,
To prepare for such acts under the sun.
I bought some things,
And differed the payment rings.

I forwent the wrapping,
It could come a tapping.
I got caught up on some TV,
Have to know how it ends at my sea.

I wrote another couple posts,
Giving me into March boasts.
Pat keeps going to work,
Now that has to annoy such a senile jerk.

Because oopsy, what is the point?
They say with their nose out of joint.
Stocked up to the brim,
For a day when things will get grim.

Laughing like Y2K,
Which faded away.
For oh my,
Down will come the sky.

Poor Chicken Little was right,
A cartoon on paper that took flight.
Wow, what a dead tree can do.
It can predict much for me and you.

Just like some moron in this day in age,
Who wrote up some conspiracy page,
After fail and fail again,
Because of an end to the writing of dead men.

So prepared for it, I surely am at my sea.
I'm prepared to get up and have a pee.
Then eat a snack,
And go once again to my work shack.

For when the 21st comes, it will shut up all those idiots with their world ending hums. Until they find some other mythical crap that will be believed by each chap. The cat will just smile for a whole mile. They have less brain cells than a bass and surely nowhere near the amount of my little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Saturday, November 24, 2012

Another Name For The Oh So Lame!

So everyone has been there even the cat at his lair. Do you know how much of a pain it is to pick the lint from my toes? That just causes the cat woes. Not to mention licking elsewhere. But we will move on from that at my lair. For it is all about the shit work that is surely not a perk.

Repetitive crap,
Is sure on tap.
Given by a lazy ass,
The buck gets a pass.

Stops on you,
Sticks like glue.
Bounces off of me,
Oops, that's a different rhyming sea.

But it is there,
At your work lair.
All you do is glare,
At the work of a mare.

Or donkey I suppose,
Ass if you are truly caused woes.
What else could it be?
A blood sucking flea?

A little worker bee?
The swing in a tree.
You're the board,
Getting rode like a Ford.

Hmmm won't go there,
I will let your mind become self aware.
A pot hole filler?
Sounds like a thriller.

Staple, stuff, staple, stuff.
Damn, you got it rough.
575 of them you say?
Yeah, that would cause display.

Maybe Santa's elf,
Putting toys on the shelf?
That wouldn't work,
You grumble without even a smirk.

You could be the nail,
Be hammered into an endless jail.
Where loads of crap just flows,
From your head to your toes.

The dam then breaks,
Flooding all the lakes.
You rust and erode,
Then get croaked at by a toad.

That might do.
Too bad one couldn't erode the glue.
And heave it at the buck passing loon,
Burying them in their own donkey work sand dune.

That would be grand.
Then could come the pound sand.
Or piss up a rope.
One can only hope.

Yeah, the donkey work comes by the ton as the end of the year gives a run. The cat is glad he can leave that to Pat. For the lint in my toes seems fine compared to that. I even get to sleep and talk crass. I am such a lucky little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Friday, November 23, 2012

It's The Cry That Rings Out Why?

Once more I have to go on about the Flap as she just will not shut her damn trap. But thankfully she isn't around much anymore. I guess that is why old Flappy has to make up for it with more yapping at Pat's work shore.

"You're still here! That guy said you quit a month a go."

Hmm so I guess the cleaner decided to get meaner and said Pat quit. Maybe he was trying to save him from a Flappy fit.

"I can't believe he said that. I knew I saw you less than a month ago. I can't believe he said that."

That went on for a while. She does have the brains of a dung pile. So I am willing to bet she heard him wrong but she kept on singing the same old song.

"Why would he say that? Who was he? That guy, why would he say that?"

Not that Pat really cared one bit. Anyone would be glad to get rid of that nitwit. Sadly it just back fired though and she went on and on at his work show.

"Girls that is what he said? He said that right. He said he was gone, right?"

They all nodded like they wanted her to shut up too. I think for her own safety they should lock her in a zoo. She could be like those monkeys that make noises and throw their own crap. Except she'd flap and spit on some poor chap.

"See they agree with me. He said that. I can't believe he said that. Why do you think he said that?"

First guess would be to shut you up. Or he too has the brains of the pup. But the former is what I am leaning toward. He just wanted to get rid of you and your makeup drenched horde.

"You say he's the cleaner? Why would he say that? Why did the cleaner say that. It makes no sense, why did he say that?"

If I have to type why once more I would be even more tempted to stab her in the eye at Pat's work shore. Of course being a cat it wouldn't be hard to do that. Just jump and poke her in the eye. My claw would surely make her cry and end the why on the first try.

"Are you going to tell anyone he said that? I think you should tell he said that. Maybe I will just have to tell he said that. Why would he say that?"

Stupid cleaner had to go and stir her up at Pat's work show. All he wanted her to do was fly the hell out of there but she kept going on and on at Pat's work lair. What did he care what the cleaner thought. But she just droned on like a damn robot.


Pat cut her off once more. I think she is started to get offended at his work shore. Which works for him and me. For maybe old Flappy will take the hint and flee. Just said who gives a damn. He's here and not gone. So go suck a ham. Okay, not really the last line but I am a rhyming feline.

She still droned on some more. But I'm tired of typing why at my shore. We would be here all damn day if I typed out the actual amount of times she said it at his work bay. So the why of Flappy will come to pass and she's not even good enough to kiss my little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Thursday, November 22, 2012

With A Thanks We Bring Out The Tanks!

It's thanksgiving day for those slow pokeys below my Canadian bay. There they will sit and be thankful for a bit. Then off they will go and stomp on people the next day at some Walmart show. Wow, impressive you humans are. No wonder I hear cats want to turn you to tar.

First cats are giving up their favorites toys,
Those that brought them joys.
To ship through the mail,
And pop out with fists of hail.

See, what did I tell you?
Humans are through.
With such a stance,
You stand no chance.

Cats will even rule space.
Those aliens will be a dead race.
No more probing by vets,
Are also safe bets.

Yoga is being used.
So you will be amused
Then with a twist,
You'll get batted with a fist.

Also nothing is off limits at all.
The computer at your hall,
Will be taken apart.
And sold for cat food at Walmart.

Weapons will be packed away.
And sent to your bay.
There they will go boom.
Spelling your doom.

And if you get too close.
You will be hunted like a mouse.
Then shot with laser eyes.
That will be such a surprise.

Even contracting out.
To make the humans pout.
Except for the trout.
They are eaten and have no clout.

Your water will be drained too.
Making you all dehydrated at your zoo.
Then you will be easy pickings,
Ready for some cat lickings.

And to show the seriousness of the cause.
Out come the claws.
For practice on the mutt,
Has advantages as down go each human nut!

Aren't you thankful for the cat? Now you have been warned at your mat. I have no opinion on the cause. I just provide them soemthing other than claws. It comes in a can and will give you a different colored tan. Maybe the war will pass? If not, it will surely amuse my little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Wednesday, November 21, 2012

Glitchy And Twitchy Being Rather Bitchy!

So for those with a keen eye, you may have noticed a tweak or two under my rhyming sky. Not much really to behold. But the cat had to fix crap as the glitches started to be more bold.

Betsy, gave a umm whine,
That no delete was in the comments of the feline.
At first it was nixed,
But I figured I'd add that to be fixed.

Of course with the actual follower widget,
Reply in the comments would be a big eejit.
So that was worked around for a while,
Until the glitches got vile.

Poof, no header to be found.
Poof, reply has taken to ground.
Poof, this doesn't work.
I'd like to poof the html template jerk.

Now no more woes,
After hours of html blows.
I beat them to death,
They tried to glitch me up until their last breath.

But it would not come to pass.
Html can't trick my little rhyming ass.
I pull out a flea,
And it eats their glitchy bug with glee.

Still nice and bright,
Wouldn't want to turn off the light.
But the glitch tried to foil it.
I ended its glitchy bitchy fit.

Now if only blogger would quit,
This slow friggin shit.
When you type up a new post,
That really annoys this host.

You have to wait for it to save.
If you take a second for yourself at your cave.
Then it just putt putts along,
Maybe they have to save it in Hong Kong?

So away we go,
With a fully working show.
At least for now,
I'm sure Blogger will screw it up some how.

And if at some high pitch,
You spy a glitch,
Keep it to yourself.
Or tell the nice Gerber Elf.

The cat had to vent as the glitch got bent. I kicked the eejit out of my place and solved the html case. Such a smart cat at my sea. Now a nap is needed by me. So the glitch is buried beneath the grass thanks to my little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Tuesday, November 20, 2012

Some dVerse Turkey Or Maybe Beef Jerky!

So with Thanksgiving coming up down south and all the Americans stuffing their mouth. Even if they are a day late and a dollar short. For we already have been there done that at each Canadian port. Still the cat will give a dVerse thrill. One that may make one want to pop a pill.

Been there done the turkey.
But things don't look murky.
For Canadians can have fun too.
And we don't act like we have no clue.

Stomping people over Black Friday crap.
Like some stupid brainless sap.
But we won't go there,
Might offend people of walmart at my lair.

Wouldn't want such scary sights tracking me down.
Just one look would make the cat frown.
Now as the cat was saying,
Before the crazies came displaying.

Since we already did the turkey.
Canadians could celebrate with beef jerky.
Or better yet,
It is a safe bet,

That rat burgers should be made.
That will be a meal that will never fade.
Maybe some cow intestines?
That doesn't appeal to felines.

But some spider legs would.
Try them at least once all should.
Along with some pigeon wings.
They are tasty things.

A pig tongue would add some spice.
Goes well with toes of mice.
And beak of crow.
I sound all witchy today at my show.

Borewors is a real thing,
Too barf worthy to give a ring.
Squirrel brain is another one.
They are tiny so you might need more than one.

Could try some scrapple.
I'd rather eat an apple.
In Hong Kong they eat cat.
Now we can't have any of that.

Jelled blood from a pig of duck.
I mean really, what the cluck?
Comes off like jello too.
That is just so ewww.

And something that will do the trick,
Making you long for some spotted dick.
Bull penis on your plate.
Now there is something I would hate.

So now things aren't so murky,
If you are sick of turkey.
Good luck with your dinner,
I am sure bull penis will be a winner.

The cat is glad he does not eat such crap when taking a food lap. I guess mutts are not so bad when they eat piles of dung at their pad. Then again that may be stretching it a bit. Just remember when eating not to spit. I wouldn't want such food near me. I would rather go fish in the sea. The cat would get some bass and that would satisfy my little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Monday, November 19, 2012

The Cat Has A Clue So Screw You Scooby Doo!

The cat was subjected to watching that mutt over and over again a while back at our den. Not that there is anything wrong with once or twice but over and over again is too high of a price. Yet the bad guys are so well named in it. That the cat just has to try it for a bit.

The Miner Fortyniner,
Doesn't make me a whiner.
For at least it rhymed,
The Phantom though isn't so well timed.

Yet this is about me,
So away we go at my sea.
The Spiking Viking,
Is to my liking.

The Snoring Boring,
Hides in the flooring.
And he sure can snore,
But is such a bore.

The Lurker Worker,
Is quite the smirker.
With his little gleam,
He puts you in a dream.

The Dish Fish is a delight,
And such a fright.
He steals those Scooby Snacks.
That must give the mutt heart attacks.

The Banner Planner,
Is one big tanner.
If you touch him you'll fry,
That means you die.

The Meow Cow,
He is just wow.
Can meow and eat at the same time.
Too bad he can't rhyme.

The Grime Mime,
Is surely a crime.
Dirt and a glass house?
Someone needs to call Mighty Mouse.

The Wagon Dragon can roar,
But that wagon is such a chore.
Not to mention it's his rump,
No wonder he is such a grump.

The Blooming Doom Groom,
Will beat you with a broom.
He cackles like a witch.
I also hear he can make you itch.

Now don't these beat,
The Black Knight who suffered defeat?
The Ghost Witchdoctor as well,
I suppose he could be swell.

Charlie the Robot though?
I mean really? What a show.
Of course if the cat didn't like it some,
He would have ignored it with his little rhyming bum.

I bet you never thought this would come to pass? Scooby Doo on that cat's grass. I'll give you all a pringle can snack if having a mutt here caused you too much flack. Plus I had to give him some sass as those bad guys can't stand up to the ones made by my little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Sunday, November 18, 2012

A Flash In The Pan Exit Plan!

So dVerse is once more going all art at their shore. Showing off some great stuff by Terry as you open the door. Or maybe come and knock on their door. Blame, Brian for that song in my head at my shore. Look switched the rhymes around. Damn, I am profound. Or just lazy today. Pfft, on with the show at my bay.

Exit to where?
User beware,
For what is out there.
Could surely scare.

You might Exit to Eden,
Or end up in Sweden.
Could cause some Exit Wounds,
Or an anvil on your head like cartoons.

An Exit Strategy you need,
So you don't exit-dently bleed.
The exit-men may be lying in wait.
Your exit-itment they may hate.

Better increase your Exit Speed.
There could be some exit-ras in need.
We know it's not a French Exit though,
Or Oui Oui would exit-ably show.

No Entry, No Exit doesn't make sense.
Unless the exit maker was dense.
That would make it a Dead Exit I suppose,
Could exit-cise your toes.

Might be an Exit Smiling,
For this exit case 911 you should be dialing.
Unless you want your Final Exit to show,
Leading to some pearly exit-otic glow.

Exit: Dead End,
Must be a growing trend.
Exit-pectadly sending you around the bend.
Maybe Exit 33 you should lend.

It is a Glorious Exit though.
For you could exit-ise your flow.
Just step on through,
And exit-isly lose all you ever knew.

This is Not An Exit they say,
This is taking the easy way.
Maybe instead of Right To Exit,
Your left should flex it.

Then by Exiting Through The Museum,
You can exit-lamor "carpe-diem."
Now you never exited at all,
Forgetting the exit on the wall.

The cat is now all exited out. Boy, that was quite the exited shout. Now I have to go chow down on a trout. I hope I did not exit-dentally make you pout. So I will exit with one final pass from my exiting little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Saturday, November 17, 2012

A Treasure Hunting We Go With This Little Flow!

First it was aliens and now treasure at my sea. The cat does get stuck on one topic for a while when digging into history. Just blame Brian for that. He started it all with his asking for it at the dVerse mat.

So somewhere near the cat,
Lies a place where many chew the fat.
Not that of my viking woman though,
She is a one cat show.

Anyway, they yap about the treasure,
One that no one can measure.
That is hidden on Oak Island somewhere,
It is oh so rare.

Every ten feet there is a trap.
And many have really died taking such a lap.
A tablet was said to show,
But now is lost to times flow.

There it was supposed to say,
"Forty feet below, two million pounds is buried." in its display.
That would be worth a ton now,
Enough to make me a royal meow.

The treasure itself though,
No one seems to know.
But many search for its glow,
Far down below.

Captian Kidd and Blackbeard both went by there.
So some say one of their treasures is in some hidden lair.
Others say that the pit was dug by the French,
Judging by the complexity and the type of wrench.

Meaning the treasure of the Fortress of Louisbourg is there.
That would be worth a hefty fare.
The jewels of Marie Antoinette also are said to reside down under.
As the french navy assisted her so she avoided plunder.

Freemasonary symbols were also said to be found,
Somewhere as they dug in the ground.
Making one think it is a sacred treasure,
With value that none can measure.

Published works go back as far as 1863,
So something has to be there under the sea.
Or maybe it was just some long lost well.
Or the gateway to Hell.

That is a bit out there,
I made that last one up at my lair.
But some even say it could house the holy grail.
Theories come in like hail.

Maybe one day we will finally know.
Should the treasure give of a glow.
Until then I guess the theories will fly.
Like the gateway to Hell made up at my sky.

Doesn't that make you want to go and dig? You could find some dough and dance a jig. Or die trying which many have done as the greed was flying. Never visited there myself. Knowing my luck I'd find an annoying elf, who would follow me all day. That just would not do at my bay. So another history lesson has come to pass, thanks to my little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Friday, November 16, 2012

With This Song And Dance They Stand No Chance!

Dirty Pat stealing all the cat's glory, as he tells his story. Oh and his computer mic sucks big time, know that as he gives a chime. It is the latest one too, just so I don't confuse you.

Listen to internet radio with The Creative Nexus on Blog Talk Radio

I had to fit that song and dance saying in, as it just worked for the win. For Irish Air and old one eye like to give a certain cry. They say they will make the cat pay, each and every day. Unless a migraine comes to one and the other is out drunk in the sun. Or old one eye just wants to whine when really all is fine. Anyway, they think they can enter my bay. Pfft the cat is king here at his wing.

She thought she could build a town,
That would win her the crown.
Pffft the cat showed her,
As he stretched his fur.

Now the cat has a great wall.
That will protect his hall.
It will never fall,
Bouncing any attack back like a ball.

Even shops protect the cat.
Such loyal followers at my mat.
They have weapons that will squash you flat.
And they are worse than a bat.

See it is so threatening I have it twice.
You will surely pay the price.
All will fall like mice,
Or may be given some lice.

You can see it stretches right around.
So not even a butt sniffing hound,
Could penetrate my sea.
Going to the gutter there is rather nasty.

But at least I invite you in.
Even though you will never win.
I added those stairs below,
For old one eye as her steps grow.

See, you can never get me.
I even have camels at my sea.
They will stop all with glee.
Even give you a flea on your knee.

And that mountain in the back,
Holds an army waiting to attack.
They have kitchenware,
And some tangled up hair.

I hear they swing it round and round.
They also yell making an awful sound.
Then they let you have it upside the head.
A frying pan can cause dread.

Those camels will water me forever.
Damn, I am clever.
You can't starve me out.
No matter your war shout.

So the cat is once more,
Once step ahead at his shore.
Having built this big shrine,
To this rhyming feline.

So give it up old one eye and Irish Air with your cry. My camels like turtle soup. They will eat that while I raid the chicken coup. What are you talking about? Don't go letting my secret out. I really made this at my sea. Pffft it is not in the museum of natural history. Don't believe that voice telling you such crap. The cat did this all after his nap. For all this hard work I deserve a nice tasty bass, they to are abundant in the land of my little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Thursday, November 15, 2012

Glitch Of A Witch Part Nine. All Is Not Fine!

We kept up at a steady pace trying to find a way out of Betsy's crazy slave place. But the tunnels were too dark, even with Drazin's glowing eyes and usual third person bark. Until we came across a complete nut. Yeah, all are crazy at this candy land hut. This one had his brains scrambled I would say. I guess someone tried to make waffle flambe.

"How can Waffles help thee? Follow Waffles quickly."

"Just what we need, another third person talking nutcase."

"Demons abound in this here region."

"Drazin has had enough of this place. Fleabag, Drazin is going to use you as slippers if you don't find a way out of here."

"A god relying on a cat. How about that?"

"Shut up, you eejits. I didn't save you to be caught again."

"Hurry, hurry. That flying bimbo will be here soon. Follow Waffles."

This guy walked like a hunchback and drooled quite a bit. And he really smelled like, well, shit. I think his brains were even coming out his ears. Or that could just be built up wax causing my OCD fears. Think Jafar and his disguise, although far far more scary on the eyes.

We figured how much worse could it be and followed the nut into a hidden cave, where he proven he was swinging from the crazy tree. He had a collection of heads and they were all tucked in straw beds. He hobbled over to each one and that is when more crazy was spun.

Blue here will tell you,
All that is true.
He says that if the mirror has been smashed to bits,
The slaves no longer go around like dimwits.
Thus the likes of Anne,
Unlike Brian, Glory Dear and the rest of the clan.

Red is a liar,
He likes to set things on fire.
He says you will all die.
Now he wants to get high.
Such a drug addict.
And he likes to create conflict.

"Are we really going to keep listening to this bloody eejit?"

"Drazin agrees with the Irish. Drazin is out of here."

Drazin went to open the door when he heard Betsy's wailing half zombie roar. Waffles hobbled back over and slammed the door shut. He even tapped Drazin on the butt.

"Never never, you need to be clever. Plus Waffles not done. You don't want to shun."

"I bet the god has never been felt up like that before."

"Drazin will squash you, fleabag."

Green is alive,
He was able to survive.
He says that those still in the mirror,
You all made clearer.
You found their hidden away place,
And the flying bimbo honed in with her half zombie face.

White is a fright.
Don't bother him at night.
Some spirits took flight.
Just open your sight.
They will return,
After their burn.

"That is all Waffles has to say. Have a nice day!"

Waffles scurried off down a mole hole leaving us with a couple of dead heads and a fishing pole. I did not even want to know what he fished for. We kept quiet as Betsy continued her roar.

"So if the demon and his underlyings are to be believed, we have to do what we set out to do?"

"Be an eejit?"

"No, destroy that Thinkcap's lair."

"So we have to avoid the big Godzilla WorqueenDan, get past a slave driving half zombified bimbo and take down a so called godly powered ass. Not to mention smash some glass."

"Bloody Hell, I need a drink."

"Drazin needs to find less active cats to get slippers from."

"Well what are you waiting for buckaroos, let's go."

Pat opened the door and peeked out finding no jelly beans guards, slaves or any other creature of lore. He waved for us to follow him. Yeah, he really was growing more dim. But we took off out of the cave and hoped Pat was not leading us to an early grave. Then of course we heard a scream. How I wish one eyed people had their own cyclops team.

"Annnnneeee. Why am I blue? Who are you? Leave me be? I hate cats!"

We heard old whiny one eye off in the distance and of course Anne took off. Maybe Betsy would drown her in a trough? At least my ears would stop ringing and the whines she would stop singing. Either way we now knew more and we followed Anne back to Betsy's front door. Old one eye was strung up ready to hang. I guess she was not a pretty blue cyclops sight to Betsy and her slave gang.

One eye is causing us trouble once more. Just when we get away she drags us back to Betsy's shore. Maybe we'll get lucky and she will hang. At least she will go out with no bang. A candy gun might hurt. But then Anne wants to make the hanging inert. So I guess we shall see what comes to pass as further we venture into candy land with the scary crew and my little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Wednesday, November 14, 2012

I Heard A Yell, Give Em Hell!

The cat was out and about when I heard the title shout. Now nothing wrong with that you say and in many cases I agree at my bay. But some nimrod yelled it during a soccer game. Still don't think they are lame? Well the soccer game was between five year olds with their germy mitts and colds. But we won't go there as it might stir up the OCD at my lair.

They kick the ball the wrong way,
Stand around and play.
Sing a little song,
Play the game all wrong.

But still you yell,
"Give Em Hell."
You must think you're swell.
Hate to see the advice you tell.

Kicked the ball at the crowd.
Used their hands and acted proud.
Slipping and sliding on the ground,
Still you howl like a hound.

"Give Em Hell."
Once more ringing that bell.
At least the hound just sniffs an ass,
You have your head up there in mass.

Skipping down the field,
Using the referee as a shield.
Leaning against the goal post,
Staring out at the coast.

"Give Em Hell."
You continue to yell.
Think you could find something new,
After the first shout or two.

Clean off their shirt,
Once more dive into the dirt.
The ball just sits there,
As none really even care.

"Give Em Hell."
You think this is a jail cell?
Something I'm sure which you can relate,
Being locked behind bars and a gate.

The clock ticks away,
Seems most had a fun day.
With grass stains galore,
Dirt, mud, nasty germs and more.

"You Gave Em Hell.
That kick to the shins was swell.
That makes you a winner."
Maybe the lack of brains is your hair growing thinner?

Or maybe you see things,
Like big golden rings,
That you think a five year old can win.
To make you rich at your bin.

Or are just a nut,
With his head up his butt.
Stuck in a rut,
With your oversized gut.

The cat watched this a while ago out and about around his show. Back when the grass was green, as I am ninety posts ahead at my scene. Still some people suck all the fun out of what takes place under the sun. Need to whack them upside the head and "give em hell" with a little dread. Maybe bury them up to their head in the grass and let them get kicked in the eye by my little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Tuesday, November 13, 2012

Oh No, The dVerse Scary Are Going To Show!

Everyone run and hide for it is the changing of the tide. Things are going to get truly dVerse. You may even get put under a curse. For this is such an awful day, so bad in every way. If you stub your toe things may rot off down below. See, I told you it was bad. I have to warn all at my pad.

With a flickity floppity flack.
You may suffer a heart attack.
And a blippery bloppery boo.
Could turn you into alien stew.

Eejity eeromy even.
Will turn you into Steven.
Might be fine for Roy,
But one eye might not want to be a real boy.

Grittily grapity grope.
You could get hung by a rope.
Jittery jangliy jam,
You suffer a face door slam.

Plippery plappery pop,
Get the runs non-stop.
Yipper yapper yang,
You are shot, Bang!

Waggle wiggle winter,
You get eaten by a printer.
Should have smashed the thing,
When I gave it a ring.

Cattity cattory cat.
Fall from a roof, kersplat.
Vollop vullop vex,
You can't break this hex.

Dringle dritty door,
My gosh, you have to do a chore.
Say it ain't so,
Ain't is in the dictionary you know.

Jiggle jitter Jack,
Will kick you in the sack.
While jimble jiggy Jill,
Will bury you in a landfill.

Zippy zappy zoom,
Your house is gone, boom!
Klipper klopper kite,
You suffer a dog bite.

Higgly haggle hog,
You get food posioning from a hotdog.
Tritty tringle torch,
There goes your porch.

Have you got the point?
Bar yourself into your joint.
Don't come out for a thing,
And if you hear a knock or ding.

Kiss your ass goodbye,
You are going to the sky.
For it's a guy selling pie.
Laced with stuff to make you die.

That all takes place because dVerse and 13 are now face to face. They built the bar on some holy ground and now the spirits are prepared to pound. So stop drop and roll. At least you will crush a killer mole. Duck and cover for it to pass and never fear, there is no need to thank my little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Monday, November 12, 2012

Such A Human Plight But A Furry Sight!

So thanks to DWei the cat has caught on to something he never knew. This just makes you humans seem so much more weird between me and you. But I will join in the rage and create a new fashion statement on my page.

See how impressed I look,
With the new rage at my nook?
I bet you all want to be a baggy now,
Thanks to my little meow.

Or grab a pass.
Look quite crass.
Stand in a line.
Pretending to be, I think, a feline.

Hailing a taxi must be rough.
He doesn't seem to have the right stuff.
Backwards and turned around.
I guess the fox lost to the hound.

Tye dye and furry.
Even if your eyes are blurry,
You won't miss these ones.
The one on the left looks like it has a bad case of the runs.
Or really has to pee,
Either way it looks shifty.

Grab this bull by the horns,
You might get some thorns.
Or just hear something crass,
From a human lad or lass.

Look at that hairdo?
It is just so blue.
I think it is really taking the animal act to heart.
Or it could be trying to squeeze out a fart.

I big pink bunny.
Looking oh so sunny.
A childrens delight.
Unless the bunny and the horse go bump in the night.

That red guy is cool.
They sure think they rule.
Striking a pose,
My what big toes.

Going off to rabbit jail.
The look he sure did not fail.
Maybe he was too busy,
The other furries threw a tizzy.

See, I was right.
They had a rough night.
All in a bunch,
Doing the bunny hop from midnight to lunch.

Finally there is mixed race bonding.
Both sides seem to be responding.
The furries and the skins,
They almost look like twins.

So now you to know that furries reside at every show. My how you humans spend your days. I still think my baggies will be all the craze. But then who wouldn't want fur? I suppose you could fake purr. Just watch where you hawk up a hairball. They don't take too kindly to that at all. Did you know about the furry class? For better or worse, now you do because of my little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Sunday, November 11, 2012

A War Is In Store!

The cat could go on about the woes of Pat but then I'd steal a page from old one eye and get whiny at my mat. Instead the cat will see what dVerse war will come out of me, as I start to rant away here at my bay.

Footsteps, light and quick.
Jangle of a brick.
A breezing whistle,
The willows missle.

Crushed to earth,
Death in birth.
Birth in death,
Gasping breath.

Crying wails,
Splintered tails.
Grudged sight,
Blurred to night.

Plenty a pleas.
Hesitant knees.
Lingering threat,
Widened net.

Cast to claim
Withering flame.
Rippling drizzle,
Faith in fizzle.

Tragedy's beam,
Hiliarity's scream.
Frustration's curse.
Saturated purse.

Theme enshrined,
Tenderly signed.
Reason long lost,
Crisping behind cost.

Abducted relish,
Prepared embelish.
Stray to legion.
The stainless region.

Lurking eclipse,
Corrupted scripts.
Gangs of horror,
Claims restorer.

Luminous mentality,
The abyss of immorality.
Formulate the history,
Truth valued mystery.

And that is what came from the cat after reading the dVerse mat. All about war and what it has in store. Not something the cat ever wishes to see like those who came before you and me, allowing use to live our life without some strife. So the cat will release some gas and thank all from my little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Saturday, November 10, 2012

A Day At My Sea For All Of Thee!

The cat figured he would surmise what goes on in your eyes. At least pretend to know what happens to all at my show. But then I really do know it all. So I will just pretend not to at my hall. Oh the ego of the cat, we will blame that on Pat.

The first thing you notice upon entering,
Is the squawk over number one.
This fight I have been mentoring,
For it continues to be fun.

Then comes the disheartening blow,
That you are stuck with number two.
So very sad, I know.
But what is a one eye to do?

Excuse me, I need a correction,
As that was out of place.
To second, one eye has no connection.
She is further down in disgrace.

You finally notice the post,
From nonsense to rants to scary pics.
Nothing is neglected at my coast,
Not even spotted dicks.

After spitting your coffee or worse,
You scroll down to leave your two cents.
Feeling as if you should curse,
As that kitty porn was intense.

You take a minute to see what you can see.
Irish Air is already there giving off her whine,
Saying how she wants to fillet me.
When really she wants a visit from the feline.

Finally the comment has been sent,
And you give a little sigh.
But damn, after all that time spent,
You begin letting the rhymes fly.

A curse to the cat comes a calling,
For all think you are a nut.
Some might find that rather appalling,
But not Petsy at her hut.

She just comes back with more,
Giving another chime.
Completely addicted to my shore,
And I even make her rhyme.

Then you see her twin,
Who is the scarier sibling.
Who hops to every bin,
Inbetween his gawker scribbling.

Also vying for number one,
But Mary, Waffles or Hank fix that.
At least sometimes under my sun,
Such fun to watch for the cat.

A reply from the cat even shows,
To each and every one.
And so the nonsense grows,
Making another tale be spun.

Over and over this takes place,
Each day at bush number five.
And at a seemingly steady pace,
Many are thankful they got out alive.

But before the finale can amass,
One thing has to come to pass.
The cat needs to get a bit crass,
And leave all with my little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Friday, November 9, 2012

Need More Room. So Away With Crap Like Doom!

So the cat was trying to clear with his little rhyming rear, a bit more room to run and have some fun. I thought it would be a perk and so I waited for Pat to go to work. He won't miss a 1000 DVDs or so that no longer decided to show. Right? As long as I keep it dark and not light. I will just rid him of some crap which is unknown to me why it is kept by the chap.

These things could bring Doom.
Abandon the smiles and bring gloom.
Capote will make you cry.
Add For Queen and Country and you'll want to die.

Freedomland is where you'll hike.
To put the Ghosts of Mars head on a pike.
Game 6 will make you wish,
Grease 2 had a singing fish.

Levity is about zero.
Man of the Year is no hero.
Ocean's Thirteen,
With Queens Logic will make you go obscene.

Brain dead after Robocop 3.
As if Robocop 2 didn't already do that to thee.
Saw anything should die.
Secret Window should remain a secret, no lie.

Might go Stark Raving Mad.
Charlie and the Chocolate Factory is just that bad.
The Clearing is your mind's fate.
Should The Fog ever pass its gate.

Unstoppable and Unstoppable are quite the par.
Yep, both same title and both suck with flare.
Unthinkable, Unfaithful, Untraceable make a big "un" run.
Along with Wild Hogs your mind will be done.

Zack and Miri Make a Porno of what?
A big flabby Zig Zag butt.
The Ghost Writer should remain a ghost.
The Detonator makes for such a bad host.

Tenbenny needs a new gig.
With a Swing Vote you'll flip your wig.
I'm not surprised you don't want to Stay.
Silent Hill will scare anyone away.

It and Nirvana couldn't pass any test.
Or even top Red Rock West.
Mutant Chronicles were a scribble.
Meantime will make your eyes dribble.

Miami Vice will also leave you so bored.
The New World should never ever ever be adored.
Love Don't Cost a Thing,
Except like Lyme Life wasted at your wing.

Legion has no followers around.
In the Valley of Elah should never be found.
Same with Howard the Duck.
That and Hero will make you go what the truck.

Harvard Man will make your eyes strain.
First Born will cause brain pain.
Edge of Darkness as where you'll lie.
Should you watch any of the above or I Spy.

See so why keep such trash out? Pat surely won't shout. I'll just kick them into a box and hide them under his socks. Then no one will know that they even show. He'll thank me and give no sass. I am such a smart little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Thursday, November 8, 2012

Glitch Of A Witch Part Eight Served Up On A Plate!

This damn hole seemed to go on forever. We could still hear WorqueenDan and his/her stomping endeavor, as he/she trotted across the land above. He/she sure did not float like a dove. More like move like a hippo, smell like a garbage dump. Finally I landed on my rump.

The sights were worse than before. We had entered into some slave labor camp's shore. They were human but zombie like as they walked back and forth taking the candy hike. There was no point to what was being done. They just moved candy from one pile to another one. Brian, Blabber and even Glory Dear were all here. Each a zombie like drone. That's when we heard Anne's usual tone.

"Get away from me you eejits. This shite is bloody well...."

She was being zapped by some jelly bean guards with a cattle prod. That's when we heard from the so called god.

"Drazin thinks Drazin should have taken Drazin's chances with the pile of mush above."

"Bryan, what do the call this?"

"I don't know. A candy chain gang."

"Couldn't they just eat their way out?"

"Yep, Drazin should have stayed above."

"I think the demon is correct."

"Sadly, I have to agree with the dimwits."

Miss Priss and I backed up behind Pat, as wonder woman, half zombie Betsy flew over us like a bat. She whipped the jelly bean guards into shape. She even squashed a sleeping one like a grape.

"What do you call a jelly bean that's been mushed, Brandon?"

"Stomach acid?"

"You ruined my trip again."

Those two kept bickering away. The rest of us watched scary Betsy's display, as she landed before us with her hands on her hips. From what she said, I think she had too many rhyme time trips.

"You free the slaves,
From their mirror graves.
This will not do.
Anne and the rest were meant to remain true."

"Can't we just take seven years bad luck and be on our way?"

She eyed Miss Priss and I like she was going to send us some place to fry.

"My power is great,
You pointed out ones still mirrored in fate.
So thanks for that kitty.
To become a snack, it sure is a pity."

"Can anyone decipher what she is going on about? Drazin sure can't."

"Some god."

"Demon, I think we have to attack."

Drazin and Pat jumped at Betsy who swatted them away. She sure had power with her zombie display. Miss Priss and I tried to run but some jelly bean guards stopped our fun. The Beer Guys were snapped up too, still bickering and also having no clue. We were herded off toward a deep fryer, large enough that our situation was surely dire.

"Fleabag, why did you have to get Drazin sent to a land without meat, for you look like a treat."

"They eat cats in China you know."

"Bryan, it figures we'd end up in a land where everything is made in China."

"Cheap labor has its perks."

"We can't die, you can't kill a ninja turtle."


Bryan and Brandon were thrown into the fryer first. They shouted about melting with their final burst. And like that Betsy had killed the Beer Guys. She swatted them like flies. Next was our turn to feel the burn, when Betsy gave a yell and Anne damned her to hell.

"It's about time you got here, Cat. Now let's go you bloody eejits."

She did not have to tell us twice. We all scurried away like mice, leaving Betsy lying on the ground after getting hit with the cattle prod Anne stole from the jelly bean guard mound.

"Saved by the Irish, Drazin is never going to live this one down."

"What is going on?"

"Bloody hell if I know."

We ran from view down some dark tunnel with no friggin clue about what Betsy was trying to prove. All we knew is we had to move. Her zombie shriek sounded out all around and we could hear the drones following her wishes like a hound. She ordered them to hunt us down and make us frown. It would be funny if they were not going to turn us into a snack. I was not about to become a rib rack.


Wow, Betsy really went all zombie nut case. Things keep making less sense at a steady pace. But at least now we know where everyone disappeared too. Betsy's underground candy slave zoo. Who knows what else will come to pass. But the Beer Guys will be mourned by my little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Wednesday, November 7, 2012

A Whole Batch Of Magic And Match!

So unless you live under a rock, for some to the cat that would not come as a shock, you have heard about Disney and that great hack Lucas becoming one under the sun. Or rather his company and such. Disney sure does have the touch. First Marvel and now his, what used to be good, stuff. They will soon rule all and to be their competition must be rough.

A magic mix and match,
Now that Disney has a new patch.
Much could come about,
Some might make people pout.

Indiana Jones and the search for Winnie the Pooh.
Hey, the crystal skull was such crap it was hard to sit through.
So maybe Piglett could add that spark.
I'm sure Indiana's whip would leave a mark.

Beauty and the Wookie.
He should have some nookie.
Could have a three way.
If the force is with Yoda on that day.

Aladdin and The Return of R2D2.
I guess with his beeping view,
He has a thing for Abu.
Who knew?

Bed Knobs and Death Stars.
I hear it will take place on Mars.
The bed didn't quite last.
I hear the wood blew its load fast.

Han Solo and The Temple of Doom.
Err ummm it has a new tomb?
Maybe people will fall for a repeat.
They might fill one whole theatre seat.

The Little Mermaid Three,
Return of the Wookie.
Damn, he really gets around.
I know three has technically already been found.

101 Ewoks on display.
Cruella needs a new dress to lay about the bay.
Might get kind of hot.
But such things can't be bought.

Toy Story Four,
The Jedi Tour.
Woody uses the force to fly them to the moon.
That sounds so wrong but it will be in theaters soon.

A Extremely Goofy Jedi.
He will take the sky,
Crash into every bird,
He may even say the F word.

The Brave Little Light Saber,
A story of much love and labor.
The poor light needs to find a way,
To join a rainbow display.

And there are many more that could come ashore. The cat didn't even touch Marvel's stuff. Mainly because Spiderman threatened to get rough. He did not want me to reveal his secret Boba Fet doll fetish to one and all. Oops, I guess I did at my hall. Sure much with the new merger will come to pass but the 4+ billion sale price makes me a jealous little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Tuesday, November 6, 2012

dVerse Pfffft Whoopdi Friggin Doo Starring Many Of You!

Robbie Raisin is here and so are many who come to peer. For Whoopdi Friggin Doo taped the auditions of all of you. You did sign the form as well. So now I get to cause you all hell. Poor dVerse is shit out of luck, tonight they will barely make a buck. Away we go and on with the very scary show.

There Claudia stood,
At her dVerse hood.
Ready to play the sax,
When she found no tracks.

It seems all had run,
To another sun.
All but a drunk hobo.
To a performance at the Whoopdi Friggin Doo Show.

First with his talent on stage,
Hank was all the rage.
My that must have taken a lot,
To get the Statue of Liberty in that spot.

Brian, was clearly upset over second place.
He even got that gawker look on his face.
Then his talent shined through.
His head is full of steam, who knew?

Waffles wanted to flash us all,
With the muscles he gained at the gym's hall.
Wow, he was really something too.
Bench pressing air is a talent I can't even do.

Just Keepin' It Real Folks had to phone it in.
For she was not going to let that rabbit win.
There in her hickville of a town,
She was hunting Waaabbbiiit and sure deserves the crown.

Adam recounted a favorite memory of his.
It seemed some rats got in his biz.
He said he performed kung fu.
But he seems scared between me and you.

Anne was surely drunk.
First she ate a skunk.
Then took a swig of another single malt,
Chowing down on some squirrel with a bit of salt.

Heaven and Grace both showed their face.
She was really all over the place.
I suppose it is hard with two in the saddle,
I wonder what she does with that paddle?

Betsy simply took the stage,
And she truly was all the rage.
A zoo quickly escaped from every cell,
Do you suppose they are drawn to her by smell?

Another who had to phone it in.
Gloria was rather cranky and needed that gin.
For she was still buried in the dirt.
At least she has some fish with whom to flirt.

Sherry brought her mutt.
Who had a talent like no other at our hut.
She got rather mad,
But he thought eating and relieving at the same time was rad.

Al grabbed his thrown from the sidewalk.
He sure can bend as well as talk.
Just look at him perched up there.
At his age he had all in needed in one spot so didn't care.

Daydreamertoo brought a donkey and a thing,
That she brought back from a visit to her British wing.
The crowd all gave a bloody hell.
But she thought feeding an ass spotted dick was swell.

There was tiny Blabber too.
She was sneezing, wheezing and scared to death,
But at least she had bottles and bottles of shampoo.
Those scary strawberries left her short of breath.

Fred just sat there and read.
The crowd was rather dead.
But he thought dragging those books there was a skill.
To watch him read took some kind of will.

Then there was old one eye.
She made the crowd gasp and cry.
She was oh so scary and blue.
Her dino was sad because she was scarier than him with her messed up view.

Mary also came with her three.
She and they were something to see.
She taught them well it seems.
For they sniff butts in teams.

Thinkingcap showed off her skill,
Raising her hand to the nearest hill.
She claimed to have the powers of the gods she likes to talk about.
That hat has to be heavy enough to make her pout.

Finally came WorqueenDan to the stage.
He was clearly different than his page.
I think the king and queen part got mixed up.
But he awed the crowd as his pissed in a cup.

And back at the dVerse mat,
There was the rhyming cat.
He was there to steal the tip jar,
Finding Claudia and the hobo passed out at the bar.

So he stopped for a quick snack,
And ended the raven attack.
He may have also gave Claudia's saxophone a lick.
As he walked off feeling rather slick.

And so ends the talent edition of Whoopdi Friggin Doo.
We here at the studio must thank all of you.
For you made us normal folks skills seem grand.
Now my toe jam picking skill can be shouted out to the land.


Wow you guys really let your talents flow. It is no wonder the tip jar was bare at the dVerse show. At least I saved Claudia and the hobo. I guess Robbie Raisin can't draw a lick with hand or toe. So he had to make due and tried to make them closely resemble you. Of course all in good fun it was spun. I expect some flack from one eye and a workqueendan attack after such a talent cry. But oh the cat enjoys sass toward his talented little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.