Wednesday, December 19, 2012

Add To Your Note A Jolly Old Quote!

So sending a letter to the fat guy? I guess at least he has a second eye. Unlike some folks around here. But she won't be named by my little rhyming rear. Maybe they are both the same age? I'm sure that would be all the rage. Now the cat will get back to the task and what is that you ask? It is simply to rift on a Christmas quote, as I go about the rhyming at my zoo for all to view.

Christmas is like any day,
At your work bay.
You do all the work,
And the credit is taken by the fat jerk.

If you believe men and women are equal in every way.
Then go to your nearest present display.
Whose are wrapped better I ask?
Men look like they did them after emptying a flask.

If you are afraid of the fat guy,
Then it is no lie.
You are a claustrophobic case.
Better carry some mace.

Santa sure has the right plan,
One which the cat is a fan,
At least for most.
Only visit them once a year at their coast.

Christmas is a time when old is new,
Or no one can get a clue.
As Charlie Brown is shown for the 100th time.
He must haul in quite the dime.

Santa only has to work once a year,
Sitting the rest of it on his rear.
Because Rudolph and Frosty bring in the dough,
Each year from their Christmas in July show.

Elf's love music as they work.
But what makes them smirk?
Wrap music of course.
That was so bad it came from a horse.

When Santa comes around.
Makes sure he isn't a hound.
He may state "toys the run on batteries are his best."
But if you're hard up put it to the test.

So he sees you when your sleeping?
With his lurking and creeping.
What a perverted dude,
Watching the cat sleep in the nude.

Elves like to flirt.
That is why Mrs. Claus never wears a skirt.
For from once simple bump,
She gets the head and no hump.

Yeah, the cat quoted here and there and then just made some up at his lair. The horse did the wrap one. That one was so lame, but still had to be done. At least no one passed some Christmas gas, except for maybe my little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

77 comments:

  1. Replies
    1. Bloody hell woman, you beat me!

      Delete
    2. Finally you won at my sea
      And beat poor old Irish Air with glee

      Delete
  2. I'm curious as to who reads this blog with only one eye but that's no bother haha since all creeds and kinds are more than welcome to stay at Cat's bay. Now you mention it it is kind of weird that Santa sees you when you're sleeping, very strange indeed in fact.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Santa is a paedophile. It's sad, but it's true.

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    2. One eye is right above
      Being first with love
      And agree with Irish Air
      At my lair

      Delete
  3. Replies
    1. Look at you cursing away at my bay!

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    2. Actually third
      Talking to yourself may be absurd?

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  4. Replies
    1. You're making quite the display.

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    2. You really can't count
      Today to any amount

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  5. Replies
    1. Must be upset that you didn't come first, so now you curse and curse and curse Haha.

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    2. Calling yourself names
      Can make for fun games

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    3. It was a pitiful attempt at being you Cat, pitiful.

      Delete
    4. I will agree
      Should have rhymes with glee

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    5. I'm lucky to squeeze out one rhyme a day.

      Delete
    6. Pfft just practice more
      Or swear and rhyme galore

      Delete
  6. The Cat
    is full
    of sass
    at his
    little rhyming
    mat.

    He sleeps
    in the
    nude
    oh that
    is quite
    crude.


    A fat man
    he fears
    staring at
    his rear.

    A thing
    he has
    for elves
    he really
    twists and
    shouts
    as they
    come into
    view,
    it's horribly
    rude.

    Now a
    Union Boss
    he is
    shouting pay
    should Santa
    give.

    And a foe
    of the slack
    with his
    little rhyming
    ass,

    Santa is a lazy capitalist pig, a member of the bourgeoisie. The working classes should pull him down! Clearly you're a Communist Cat. Your name is really Meow Tse-tung.



    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You have a lot to say at my bay. And the Cat is a God so why not rule China as well as Canada Haha.

      There, I've taken up your slack today Cat. Now pay me.

      Delete
    2. The cat will sleep bare
      All day at his lair
      Doesn't bother me
      If santa is creepy
      I'll just get my pringle can
      And pelt the gawking man
      Not sure it counts answering yourself
      Did you get up to something with an elf?
      Giving you lots of energy today
      Plus you didn't even rhyme in the retort to yourself at my bay haha

      Delete
    3. When I typed in 2nd, Matthews comment hadn't published yet. Have you seen any of the meme's for all the cat dictators.

      Here's Kittler and Mewoseph Stalin

      http://www.kulfoto.com/cat-pictures/29706/meowseph-stalin-and-kitler

      Delete
    4. haha first time I saw those
      And Matthew caused your counting woes

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    5. Have you ever heard of kitten huffing? If not, I'll stop by and leave you a link before Nitey Nite time.

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    6. Hahaha never heard of that
      Oh so crazy the things you humans do with the cat

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  7. lol....those elves better watch or they'll make the naughty list, i am glad santa is the one to gawk, can you imagine some he spies like a hawk, might make you throw up, at least he only works one day a year, that would give me cheer

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. do you count anne as one
      so i can be 5th to the fun
      or am i really twenty again
      which is a horrible sin
      but then again i am 21 as well
      what the hell

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    2. Yeah might make me throw up indeed
      Spying on such old bitties at their feed
      Making his own playboy type thing
      Except for the over the hill wing haha
      And hmm if it makes you feel better at your sea
      You can pretend 5th was gotten by thee

      Delete
  8. In two days at your place I've learned Santa is a perv and a lazy ass. What's next? Santa the criminal? Santa the serial killer? Can't wait til tomorrow!!!!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. A serial killer he could be too
      Jack the Ripper with a hoe in his view

      Delete
  9. The commenter above must be a mind-reader. I was thinking the same thing! I wonder what we're going to learn about Santa next? haha.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Not sure what we will learn
      I hope nothing makes your eyes burn

      Delete
  10. Um . . . Santa only works one day a year? lol That's like saying an election officer (the one who actually runs the entire election) only works one day a year (two if there's a primary). Uh, I'm already working on next November's election.

    Happy Christmas!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. haha politics and santa at play
      Such a fun display
      But I suppose you are right
      I guess he does more than one night

      Delete
  11. Didn't anticipate Santa such
    Ho, ho, ho! what do you know
    All in a day's work in as much
    But he managed more than just Mrs Claus

    Hank

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yeah all in one day's work
      Must be a perk
      One whole day a year
      The rest he sits on his rear

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  12. I've decided you will only get coal
    as you keep putting Santa in a black hole.
    Making him out to be a dirty old man
    who prances around, showing his fan (ny)
    lol....

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Well coal I can biff at ones head
      If they cause me dread
      So has it's uses too
      Should such a present ensue

      Delete
  13. sigh. I just fail when it comes to rhyming. You know.
    I guess that's just the way it goes.
    But when it comes to Santa's credit
    I like to do a little edit
    and only stuff the stockings w/candy
    the rest I wrap, and it's just dandy!

    *squee*!!! I did it!!! :D <3

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. LOL that you did
      Even squee-ed like a kid haha
      Well done
      Rhyming oh so fun

      Delete
  14. So mrs. Claus doesnt wear a skirt!?!???!
    Interesting:))

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Nope none at all
      She goes bare like the cat at her hall

      Delete
  15. so true about the santa credit

    Four stages of life:
    Believe in Santa
    Don't Believe in Santa
    Become Santa
    Look like Santa

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. haha that is a good way to look at it
      Each one is some sort of hit

      Delete
    2. Egging others one
      Geez such acts at my lawn

      Delete
  16. I sure ain't afraid of the big fat guy, oh, not our neighbor again!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. LOL that neighbor need to go
      Trot over and poo on his toe

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  17. And how do you know Mrs. Claus doesn't wear a skirt? LOL!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. That cat had a look
      AS he creeped about Santa's nook

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  18. orlin N casie

    N haz ya ever wundered why de abominable snow dood wuz on rudolph; scarin de ba jezuz outta everee one...uz cats thought this wuz pozed ta be "happee" ???? show.....

    just sayin

    :) meowloz !

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hmm I don't know
      Maybe he lost his happy glow
      But all was better by the end
      As Rudolph set the trend

      Delete
  19. Santa works hard those days he works
    never is he one who shirks
    he may be getting old and grey
    but so will we all someday.

    Charlie Brown is a holiday tradition
    but I'm tired of the yearly rendition
    Rudolf I will take any day of the year
    he makes me happily grin from ear to ear.

    Have a good day
    keep the elves away!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yeah rudolph is grand
      Each year across the land
      But Charlie Brown
      Needs to go to another crown
      And I guess he does a ton
      On the day or two he gives work a run

      Delete
  20. Men look like they did them after emptying a flask..
    Ooo so true! And they're twice as slow, so there you go... or rather, stay, for at that speed you're not going away.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yeah that is true
      Slow and crappy wrapping comes due
      I guess we suck
      And just want to umm ride in a truck

      Delete
  21. Okay, I'm now officially freaked out about Santa. :O

    But thanks for the tip, Cat and Pat. If I get drunk before I wrap the presents, it will look like my hubby wrapped them. That's about right. :D

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. He is a freak
      With his little freaky squeek
      Run away
      And there you go, great excuse at your bay

      Delete
  22. No, it isn't very pleasant
    When a man has wrapped the present--
    It's quite the pity
    That it's not very pretty.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. haha but still fun to chew
      At least a time or two

      Delete
  23. Uh oh, someone is getting coal, we are sure!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. haha bring it on
      I'll biff it at people who trespass on the lawn

      Delete
  24. Okay Cat here goes. First you have to learn about the Cat Nation as founded by Paco Tacoyummy. He led a band of revolutionary cats whose goal was to stop the snip snipping of males.

    http://uncyclopedia.wikia.com/wiki/Cat_Nation

    Now you have to know what kitten huffing is because the Paws of Righteous Harmony are against it. (you will be too).

    http://uncyclopedia.wikia.com/wiki/Kitten_Huffing

    I thought of you when I found this stuff. Could be a useful springboard for a post or two. Those pics of kittens in bottles are priceless!

    Nitey Nite Cat.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. haha that works for me
      Will give me a post or three
      Saved them for when I start typing again
      After my long break from my work den

      Delete
  25. A rather interesting viewpoint of the North. :P

    ReplyDelete
  26. I'm totally phobic of the fat guy :)

    .......dhole

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. A phobe
      Maybe he skips you across the globe

      Delete
  27. hahaha…this is fun. That wrap music joke is great, but I love corny jokes. And I had to laugh really loud, good thing none of the other rooms are near mine, otherwise would've awoken them, the gift line about the flask, no, no I didn't take one to task, but as I was reading this I had to peer, into the corner of the room and look at the gifts I wrapped earlier today, and yep no one will have any doubt that I wrapped these myself lol

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. haha yeah corny jokes are fun
      I put them in under my sun
      Yeah no doubt what so ever at my zoo
      That it was my wrapping endeavor too

      Delete
  28. hahah I must say- I kind of wrap my presents like a guy. So it'd be hard to tell the difference in the sexes from my gifts!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. haha well just blame it on the boy
      I'm sure you can play coy

      Delete
  29. I wonder if i can apply to be santa, i only want to work once a year and thanks to my sleep walking i do watch people sleep during the night!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. There you go
      A bit creepy though
      Sure you could pull it off
      And not make the kiddies scoff

      Delete
  30. There is snow forcasted in Chicago and along with this you have put me in the Xmas spirit! Thanks so much!

    FOLLOWED!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Glad I could
      And no snow is great in any hood

      Delete