Sunday, January 13, 2013

Down To Hell For A Spell!

Let's see what the cat can do as he weaves this tale in rhyme, as always, for all to view. Should be interesting to see if it can be done. But of course most anything can be done under my sun. So away we go and it's on with the show.

Two Canadians sit all blue,
Their igloos side by side.
Too cold to achoo,
So they take a death ride.

Down to hell they go,
Not really caring why.
The lava sure did flow,
Fire was set to the sky.

The devil trotted up,
Asking about their clothes.
He offered them a booze cup,
They declared they were still froze.

The devil had to fix that.
He couldn't lose his reputation.
So he warmed Hell's mat.
Saying they would suffer in damnation.

The two Canadians refused,
To take off their winter clothes.
The devil felt abused,
Threatening to fry them like crows.

They both stood freezing in place,
So the devil added more heat,
Watching as their teeth chattered at a steady pace.
He would not admit defeat.

These two Canadians were through.
They could not win,
This was no igloo.
He would cause them pain for their sin.

He put them through the ringer,
Causing every kind of woe,
Even hit them with a stinger,
From their head to toe.

He even burned their clothes,
Causing them more pain.
Only adding to their woes,
They were still aboard the cold train.

In a a final act,
As his desperation grew,
Some cold he would attract,
To completely freeze these two.

The tempurate of Hell,
Dropped as cold as ice.
The two laughed in their cell,
For the devil had paid the price.

He found nothing funny,
And threatened them once more.
Saying he'd fry them like a bunny,
If they didn't stop their encore.

They continued laughing quite a bit,
Finally revealing their plan,
As they continued to sit,
Ever the merry fan.

We need no four leaf clover,
So our wives can mourn,
For Hell has frozen over,
Meaning in our next life we'll be kings of porn.

So there we go, they tricked the devil at Hell's show. With ice and fire things may turn dire but use your mind and a saying can get you out of a bind. Or something like that if you were to land at Hell's doormat. Hopefully a next life does come to pass or it will all be for not and that would be funny to my little rhyming ass.

Enjoy your winter, smash a printer.

42 comments:

  1. Replies
    1. Brian almost got here
      But you beat him I fear

      Delete
  2. ha....funny story cat, that is the way to work over the devil like that show him a thing or two and have him use hellfire to heat up the loo, a cold seat is not nice, dont get cold feet, or think twice...it was in the 70s here yesterday so hell must be working overtime...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yeah has to be going at it
      As here where I sit
      All nice and warm too
      Or at leat warmer than what typically comes due

      Delete
  3. This story really made me laugh Pat haha, talk about a cautionary tale, those Canadians are funny with their hijinks me thinks!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. haha yeah just had fun
      As a hell tale was spun

      Delete
  4. Oh what did 2 Canadians do
    To reach such degradation
    To flee away from the chimney flu
    To protect their reputation

    The devil's scorn, the devil's path
    They use their ammunition
    Like a bullet-proof vest I'll do my math
    And wait in my own partition.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hope it's not a long wait
      Could be an awful fate
      Sitting there with the heat
      But at least there will never be cold feet

      Delete
  5. Cold Canadians? What is this nonsense? A real Canadian embraces the cold winter with open arms!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. haha pffffft to that
      Hate the cold at our mat

      Delete
  6. Sounds as if they one-upped the devil
    And for that they surely reveled
    For the devil, I'm sure no one will weep
    For he has sewn, so now he must reap

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yeah reaping himslef
      Down at hell's shelf
      Must be rough
      And rather tough

      Delete
  7. Playing a fool with the devil
    At the entrance going to hell
    Make no mistake, serious matters
    Ought to be clearly resolved

    Hank

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yeah must avoid that
      Would not be nice for the cat
      Although at least no cold
      Would come and take hold

      Delete
  8. Ha, leave it to the Canadians. Smiles.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. The canadians can do much
      Like drink beer and such

      Delete
  9. What an interesting tale
    as the devil did wail!

    ReplyDelete
  10. Hell froze over? That can't be, that when the Minnesota Vikings are due to win the Superbowl! lol

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. haha but they may not win
      So it could not be a sin

      Delete
  11. Only Canadians could make Hell freeze over!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Damn we are good
      Market that we should

      Delete
  12. I wonder what it's like to live in a igloo

    probably be pretty awful after an hour or two

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yeah that it would
      I'd move far away from that hood

      Delete
  13. In Seattle, fighting heat and cold is not our battle,
    but the rain can be a pain.....

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Oh yes all that rain
      But sure be a pain at your lane

      Delete
  14. I felt a little warmer just reading this. Thanks Pat! :D

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Glad I could help some
      The cold is glum

      Delete
  15. Two loonies
    went to Hell
    and there
    did they dwell.

    For they
    were mimes
    and for their
    crimes they
    did hard time.

    So bad were they
    that Satan
    paid with
    an icy hellish
    soul.

    Okay, this is all quite disturbing Cat. I didn't know Canadians watched porn.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. haha the mimes can stay
      In their hell bay
      Good place for them to be
      Far away from my sea
      Geez need to get with the times
      There is porn for canadians and even mimes

      Delete
  16. I had a terrible migraine this morning Pat so just visiting now ~ What a story on those two Canadians, hey, don't make it look so bad, okay ~

    Have a good Monday ~

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hopefully the stupid migraine is gone
      Far far away from your lawn
      And yeah who knew
      Canadians had such things to make come due

      Delete
  17. I didn't think Canadians went to hell? I thought their hell was having to put up with their "neighbors" heh heh.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. haha that could be true
      Those to the south can make us stew

      Delete
  18. LOL; more that one way to "burn in Hell" I liked this.

    ......dhole

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Certaintly more than one way
      With a canadian eh

      Delete
  19. Those Canadians! They tricked the devil then sent all their geese down here to over run the parks. Hee, hee, they sure know how to get things done.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You can keep those geese
      We'll even send you some moose err umm meese

      Delete
  20. hell frozen over, saw that coming with the igloo, but the porn, how funny. Great rhyme here, love the longer ones that rhyme, but aren't the same length, so an artistic rhyme I'll say, liked it a lot at you're bay, tricking the devil is always great, reminds me in a way, of that Tenacious D song where they tricked the devil with a song. Quite good. Thanks

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yeah stretch my skill
      Every now and then to get my fill
      As the tale it told
      Making hell oh so cold

      Delete
  21. genius! I sure will remember that trick and will get some bets done before I die...Queen of the Universe her I come.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. haha ruling all isn't a bad goal
      Good luck with such a stroll

      Delete