Have to wait and see who this could be!
So you know the cat likes to pester and can be a patience tester. It is so fun to annoy and it brings the cat joy. You humans are so fun to take on, falling for all my tricks at your lawn. But the cat will never give those away. Instead he will show off your petty ways to annoy today.
So you want to annoy?
Here is a ploy,
Or maybe ten,
To make it happen at your den.
Simply ask all to prove it.
Should be fun for a bit.
My name is Pat,
Prove it, is what you shout at your mat.
When getting out of an elevator next time,
Commit a terrible crime.
Hit all the buttons and run.
That would be such fun.
Need to use the laundry mat?
Here is a tip from the cat.
Use a seperate dryer for each of your socks.
That will get some gawks.
Pretend you are at a loss,
To every person you come across.
Ask them what gender they are.
That will annoy by far.
End everything you say,
Each time at your bay,
With whoopdi friggin doo.
Or just go achoo.
Whenever anyone says hi,
Look to the sky.
Bark like a mutt,
Just don't sniff their butt.
Call your family collect.
That is something they won't expect.
They don't pick up, oh well.
Save money on your cell.
Pick a song,
That will make all sing along.
Such as the one below,
That I just have to show.
This is the song that never ends,
It goes on and on my friends.
Some people, now it's stuck in your head.
I love causing such dread.
Or the wheels on the bus for round and round,
Round and round, round and round.
I think I have proved once more my case.
Have fun singing that all over the place.
Develop an unnatural fear,
And even throw in a tear,
Or a big scary pen.
Although you might end up in the loony den.
Finish the 99 bottles of beer song.
That can do no wrong.
You'll get told to shut up,
Or hit with a coffee cup.
Go to a poetry affair,
At some far off lair,
And ask why they all don't rhyme.
Warning, you may get struck down in your prime.
And last but not least,
Inform all you meet from west to east,
That they only exist in your mind.
Then at least you wouldn't have to be kind.
There are a ton more but I'd go on forever at my shore. Of course I could also annoy that way. Oh such fun I have at my bay. Maybe I'll have to do an annoying part two here at my zoo. Of course there is also that annoying singing wall bass. I just want to strike that down with my little rhyming ass.
Enjoy your winter, smash a printer.
No.#1
ReplyDeleteHank
Many are after you
DeleteBetter watch what comes due
#2 Dangit! Props to Hank. ;)
ReplyDeleteYay Yay Yay
DeleteHere's a posey
Just for Rosie
My pompom'a are shak'n
#1 you'll soon be make'n
Got the cheerleader down
DeleteHere at my town
And only a little off too
As Hank i lurking at 7 all the time at my zoo
Dang Rosey... and you were so close. Maybe tomorrow will be your day.
Deletehaha so close
DeleteDoesn't count at my house
It's brutal in here w/the fellas I see. I was just going to blow it off and give Hank his due, but w/the two ladies here cheering, I may try again next week. ;)
DeleteHank is good... but I'm willing to hang in there w/the competition a little while longer. :)
haha well good luck
DeleteSome days Hank is out so you may get first cluck
One need not say a word
ReplyDeleteWicked smile is already bad
Others will get annoyed
Thinking they've been had
One need not even insult
Look to the sky, act stupid
They would just get fed up
To put up with your antics
Hank
haha yep that is all it takes
DeletePretend to jump in lakes
Don't have to say one word
Then just run away thinking your absurd
Wow, you have come up with a long list of ways to annoy for sure! I have experienced getting on an elevator and finding all the floor buttons pushed. DEFINITELY annoying to have to stop at each floor.
ReplyDeleteI might annoy some as I walk the track at the Y. Sometimes I catch myself humming along with the song playing on my iPod. I don't always realize it...until someone gives me a 'look.' LOL.
Does that really surprise
DeleteI can annoy flies haha
And yeah being the one to get stuck
Sure makes you say something worse than duck
haha hum away
Annoy them all day
haha...i think i have a serious poetry affair with all the poems at my lair ya know..and now go and teach me that 99 bottle beer song..smiles
ReplyDeletehaha go ahead and run that through
DeleteAll will be annoyed by the time one comes due
Pestering does bring joy
ReplyDeleteThat it does
DeleteCreating such a buzz
If your name is Eloise
ReplyDeleteNot everyone can you ever please
If your neighbor's name is Dennis
You may ship him off to Venice
If your name by chance is Tom
Return the pig or tell his Mom
If per chance your name is Peter
Hide the pumpkins,run a meter
If your game is to annoy
There are others not so coy
If the wrong way of others you rub
There's room at the top, join the club
The names fly
DeleteFrom each girl and guy
Those ones I will avoid
Now you got me paranoid
But room at the top
Sure isn't a flop
Top of the crop
With a bob shh bop
Hahahaha... My Hubs name is Dennis, should I ship him off to Venice?
DeleteHe might like that
DeleteA free trip to the Venice mat
Do you know anyone who is annoying just by breathing? I do.
ReplyDeleteFlappy sure wins that
DeleteAt my mat
lol...annoying as hell, but sometimes its fun to ring the bell of those that need it, and i'll admit i might have done one or two as i danced about the zoo...the elevator for sure, now wasnt that a burr. and all you need is to disagree with some to cause a stir...
ReplyDeletehaha yep getting them back in a little way
DeleteIs fun to do at each bay
I hit all the buttons a time or two
Sure some was annoyed that came due
Brian has danced about the zoo? Now how did I miss that one? Oh wait...not my zoo....lol....
Deletehaha not hard to believe though
DeleteSure he danced quite a jig at his show
oh, yes, these are definite ways to annoy. The elevator thing used to irk me some big time when I used to do the hotel stays. Many of these I've encountered, and, to be perfectly honest, I think I've used a few myself over the years.
ReplyDeleteYeah we all have seen them at our bay
DeleteAnd even if we don't want to admit it have used them in one way
You have an *eeeeeeevil* mind Pat! And Cat toooo!!!! -giggles- Glad I don't live near your pad. It could be... problematic, to say the least!
ReplyDeleteHeh-heh-heh...
haha evil is grand
DeleteSo fun to put it to work in my land
problematic. lol....and you'd have to watch for Pringle cans being flung.
Deletehey..if you don't eat those anymore, what do you do when you scoop litter at your shore?
Geez forgetful aren't we
DeleteRemember I said I use the spinach plastic containers at my sea
Oh yes, my mind is failing!
DeleteI can't even remember an attachment while emailing!
LMAO!
LMAO yep that is bad
DeleteFirst hands, now mind, breaking down at your pad
Hate that song that never ends. Almost as much as 99 bottles of beer on the wall. To tell you the truth, not sure which I like the least.
ReplyDeleteSing them both at the same time
DeleteWhich ever gets stuck in your head is the worst chime
All cats like to pester!! I think that is why they were put on this earth, .. to pester us.
ReplyDeleteCan you imagine asking a big tough guy what gender he is. Might end up picking your teeth up off the floor.
LOL I can run really fast
DeleteSo I wouldn't get a cast
And yep pester away
They do at every bay
LOL; now I have two songs in my head, they will be there all day I dread, wheels going round, beer bottles being taken down; that cat really does like to annoy, does he ever bring joy?
ReplyDeletebetty
haha annoying is to much fune
DeleteAnd always must be done
These things would be very fun to do!
ReplyDeleteHave you done any of them at the zoo??
haha have done a few
DeleteFrom songs to slapping elevator buttons to faking an achoo
Love this Pat, I could definitely see you going on and on with the list of endless possibilities haha, funny rhymes man.
ReplyDeleteYeah there is a ton one could do
DeleteIf they want to annoy at their zoo
Lamb Chop and the Song that never ends? Oh, Cat...that's so wrong to do that to me today! Payback time...
ReplyDelete100 bottles of beer on the wall, 100 bottles of beer!
Take one down, pass it around, 99 bottles of beer on the wall.
99 bottles of beer on the wall. 99 bottles of beer!
Take one down, pass it around. 98 bottles of beer on the wall.
98 bottles of beer on the wall. 98 bottles of beer!
Take one down. Pass it around...
Must get back to work now. See you again soon:)
LOL trying to get payback on me
DeleteThat is not nice of thee
I'll have to go crank up a tune
So no beer stays in the head of this loon
This sounds like fun! I'm going to pretend that everyone is a figment of my imagination today.
ReplyDeletehaha works really well
DeleteOthers might not think it so swell
Oh thanks so much, now I have Lamb Chops song that never ends in my head for the day. I used to watch that show with my daughter when she was younger..lol
ReplyDeleteYeah I watched it way way back when
DeleteHated it at my den
Only one tv though then
Now all easily have ten
A good and crazy list to annoy people for sure Pat ~
ReplyDeleteIf I end my post or sentence with that funny and long verse,
it will make people go nuts, like I am a broken record ~
Have a good weekend Pat ~
haha but oh it is so fun to see
DeleteAs they go nuts and shout at thee
Do you have a Singing Wall Bass?
ReplyDeleteI think you deserve one for your sass!
Might have to find one in the auction trash
and send it to your smart little ass!
Nothing stuck in my head
until I could hear Lamp Chop, and with dread
I began humming the Song That Never Ends.
You will be repaid, my friend!
lmao....
LOL we used to have one
DeleteLong time ago under my sun
Remembered it scarred the cats too
As its head moved on cue
Geez feisty today
At my bay..lol
Well at least since it never ends
You'll always have something to say to your friends
Friends I will have no more
Deleteif I sing that at my shore.
haha.
haha well that could be a perk
DeleteTo at least get rid of a jerk
I think you were never the little brother
ReplyDeleteso you didn't get big siblings to bother
and you're trying to relive something you never got
like some annoying little tot.
haha.
haha I got it quite a bit
DeleteAs I liked to stir up shit
I guess it just stuck
So all are out of luck
The cat is baaaadddd!
ReplyDeletebut make me laugh
this::
Whenever anyone says hi,
Look to the sky.
So I know what you make when look people dont like:)
Yep just tilt your head
DeleteTo ignore what was said
Bad is grand
Here in my land
Hi Pat! Your post brings back memories of seemingly never-ending school bus field trips hearing the kiddos sin 99 bottles of beer... with great delight! Have a good evening!
ReplyDeleteYeah they sing it with great delight
DeleteAnnoying all day and night
So much fun to do
As you go to the zoo
That sounds like normal for most I'm sure, but not here, tis a bit of a bore.
ReplyDeletehaha have to go farther you say
DeleteThere at your bay
My kids do a lot of these things already. Great list, though! Woopity friggen doo.
ReplyDeletehaha it being normal can be interesting too
DeleteAnd nice with the whoopdi friggin doo
Just show me the itty bitty kitty
ReplyDeleteand wham bam I'm out there mam!
Tearing up and down the garden
wondering wha' 'appened!
You see I'm a Doodle Dog
Who's trying to understand
the ways of the itty bitty kitty
That's All!
Sophie Doodle 1/2 Poodle here!
haha the itty bitty kitty
DeleteMay head for the city
And get far away
From your dancing display
But this kitty
Ain't bity
He likes dogs too
So may just swat you
You suck! First I was mad because of the stupid This is the song that never ends but then I read the wheels on the bus...and yep, I remember that blasted post and how angry and it made Jax and I. Stupid Cat!
ReplyDeleteGoodnight, Pat...
haha pissing off you and blabber is grand
DeleteAlways fun to do in my land
Too funny...everytime! Speaking of asking gender...I dislike when people ask the gender of your baby when they are drenched in pink!
ReplyDeleteYeah that is kind of dumb
DeleteSome people must be drunk off rum
hit all the buttons and run
ReplyDeletein an elevator it's hard to be done
haha but you can run
DeleteUnless the elevator is stuffed a ton
I can't compete with your awesome rhymes
ReplyDeleteor with the talented responses.
So I'll just say, I love your posts. :-)
haha that works too
DeleteCould practice at your zoo
When sitting at a light
ReplyDeletegive the folks quite a sight.
Just strike a pose
with a finger up your nose.
Then like a cube of sugar
just eat that booger.
Blah to that
DeleteStirs up the ocd of the cat
Rather pick and flick
The eat it a that is just ick
I am a good boy
ReplyDeleteAnd never annoy.
If you think that's true
I have a bridge I will sell you!
haha wow a bridge
DeleteI bet I could fit it in my fridge
LOL! This was my favorite verse:
ReplyDelete"Go to a poetry affair,
At some far off lair,
And ask why they all don't rhyme.
Warning, you may get struck down in your prime."
haha yep it it true
DeleteThey will string up you
It seems like the cat has a little trickster streak in his blood. I might have to try that elevator prank some day ;)
ReplyDeletehaha yep plenty of trickster surrounds
DeleteHere at my grounds
all heights of annoyance crossed :P
ReplyDeletewho should i sympathize with pat or cat :D
Pat, not the cat
DeleteHe stirs everything up at our mat