Monday, June 3, 2013

Time To Work Out, Come Now Don't Pout!

So way back when at my den Mary also said the cat should do a workout post.  So I will get to training at my coast. By the time the cat is done you will be in tip top shape under your sun.

 

First you have to stretch,
And you can do it through better things than fetch.
This will help your reflexes too.
We all want to avoid the poo.

 

Next work those arms.
Turn off car alarms.
Then flatten a tire,
Change it and your biceps will grow higher.

 

Take a horse for a ride,
You can then walk with pride.
As you clench that ass,
Eventually it will become top class. 

 

Now take a break,
And work on balance by the lake.
If he can do it, so can you.
Can do it with one foot or two.

 

Stretch those legs as well,
Crossing them is swell.
Then they are stretched and crossed.
And it doesn't even cost.

 

You have to eat too.
So get something big at your zoo.
Then give those face muscles a work out.
You may want to stick to something like trout.

 

A leg stretching routine?
Is that all going on at this scene?
Pushing and pulling those legs apart,
I hope nether let loose a fart.

 

Balance a fish bowl on your head.
That is what I said.
It will keep your head straight.
And you can use it to hold fish bait.

 

And finally if this is too much for you,
You only have one final thing to do.
Give those neck muscles a good stretching out.
Do it out of view though as some may shout.

There you go, now you can get all buffed up at your show. The cat is so helpful to all of you. I don't know why I do it at my zoo. You'll give Arnold a run for his money with those tricks and it even works for hicks. Afterwards go roll in the grass it is a good cool off routine for my little rhyming ass.

Experience spring, have a fling.

120 comments:

  1. I know some that could use a good neck stretching

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Go John #1
      Hank is taking a rest, remember?
      Will he be rested by September?

      Delete
    2. 3 months of rest
      wow takes a while for him to be at his best lol

      Delete
    3. Am around Manzi
      But not Sept!
      Some fishes to fry
      Just a little while!

      Hank

      Delete
    4. Frying a fish
      Hope it is a tasty dish

      Delete
  2. Replies
    1. Go for it John!
      Anybody's game!

      Hank

      Delete
    2. Hank gives up
      no coffee in his cup?

      Delete
  3. Replies
    1. Either way
      A hairball may be on display

      Delete
  4. If I would do all of those every morning, I wouldn't have the kink in my neck at the end of the day.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yeah pat needs to do that too
      With all the crap at his zoo

      Delete
  5. ha, the best exercise comes with legs apart, its good for your heart and burns all kinds of calories, hope that elephant does not meet a breeze cause if he falls that could spell doom for us all...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. First you have to find the one
      To have such legs apart fun
      And yeah dumbo may spell doom
      Squashing all like a mushroom

      Delete
  6. Holy Crap, that bird must have just eaten at Taco Hell.

    ReplyDelete
  7. These are amazing Pat, the best one is the bird swooping down for a poo, that must have been amusing for you!

    ReplyDelete
  8. Some fitness routines are best avoided...like most of these, lolol

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. LOL but if you need to fill the void
      Why avoid

      Delete
  9. I'll pass on that neck exercise
    That would not be a pleasant surprise
    Whenever I work out, I reward myself with a milkshake
    After all, it's all about give and take

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Not a fan of stretching the neck?
      Could keep it from becoming a wreck

      Delete
  10. Leg stretches in bed are my favorite.

    ReplyDelete
  11. In my town there is a tree
    Where spectators shouted loud with glee
    Bad guys danced at the end of a rope
    They exercised without any hope

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. That tree
      Must be quite scary
      To any wanting to commit a criminal act
      Knowing such a fact

      Delete
  12. Ha, I didn't realize how inspiring I was with my suggestions! LOL.

    I hope never to have to strengthen my biceps by changing a tire.
    That guy with the mega-burger will have to exercise for 24-hours straight to work off THOSE calories.

    I'd try to kill someone who put their feet on my blinds! He'd burn calories by running as fast as he could to get away from me.

    As for the neck stretching exercise, no thank you on that one!
    I'd rather have a fat neck than a thin. Smiles.

    Have a great day at your bay!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Inspired away
      And seems you could add to it at my bay
      Scaring those away
      From putting their feet up at your bay

      Delete
    2. Ha ha, I always like to add at your bay
      if I have some wisdom (LOL) to say!

      Delete
    3. haha and say away
      Can make the cat's day

      Delete
  13. Oh god, I've been doing it wrong all these years. Is the cat available for personal training sessions?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You must pay in advance
      And no refunds if you die, lose a limb or end up in a trance.

      Delete
  14. As always the cat is so kind
    with tips coming from his behind
    Making sure we all stay nice and fit
    But I think you are really full of poop!
    You don't really care about any of us
    and wouldn't mind if we were hit by a bus.
    I think that would make you smile
    and you'd be laughing all the while.

    Happy Monday, Pat!!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. hahaha especially if it was you
      And your one eyed view
      But the cat wouldn't get that lucky
      You'd scare the driver like Chucky
      Then he'd ram some other poor schmuck
      So guess we're all just poop outta luck

      Delete
  15. Oh no, not exercise! That should be a four letter word!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You mean naps?
      Don't fall for the traps

      Delete
  16. True. We do all want to avoid the poo. It doesn't always work that way. :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yeah sometimes they get you
      With what comes due

      Delete
  17. I kept thinking "What if that beach ball popped?"
    I suspect it would hurt a lot!

    Lucy from Lucy's Reality

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yeah that it would indeed
      Not even sure how he did the deed

      Delete
  18. Anything but a neck stretch, assuming that we are not meant to balance ourselves on a ball with our legs up in the air :-)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Sit on a ball
      Stick your legs on the wall
      Quite the balancing act
      And that is a fact

      Delete
  19. I'll stick to just plain ol' walking, please and thankyou! ,-)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. No get up an go
      To be creative at your show? lol

      Delete
  20. No thanks! I'll just take my day real slow.
    At my age I have no "get-up and go!"
    I'll just sit in my chair and read a book,
    on the benefits of exercising here at my nook.
    Turning those pages should burn off a few,
    of calories and inches, to name just a few...WHEW!!!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. haha and rhyming like that
      Here wit the cat
      Will surely lost a pound or three
      As it can take a lot out of thee

      Delete
  21. ha ha..
    for some workout can be a pain in the ass :P

    missed you pat..
    wish u r doing fine :)
    always fun to come back to your place !!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yeah many are a pain in the ass
      Always fun when you come by for a pass

      Delete
  22. lol -
    If all else fails, walk the dog at the park
    Make sure to rile the geese up well
    By encouraging Fido to bark
    Then turn and get ready to run like hell
    Back to the place where you park

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. That works well too
      Those geese can be quite tasty and many have no clue

      Delete
  23. For stretches
    let's do
    some ball
    catches
    with group,
    then walk,
    and for fun
    I will spin
    hula hoop

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. haha do the hula with your hoop
      That could throw one for a loop

      Delete
  24. Yep. All kinds of ways to work out -- or excuses not to. lol

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yeah just as many ways not too
      At ones zoo

      Delete
  25. I hated Mars attacks as a kid.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yeah it was meh to watch
      Unlike drunk on scotch

      Delete
  26. None of these looks appealing to me
    Except the leg stretches, with the right company.
    But farts would be lewd
    And ruin the mood.

    xoRobyn

    ReplyDelete
  27. Replies
    1. Glad I could help out
      With my shout

      Delete
  28. Some look more fun than others....ahem...lol....

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Don't want to be at the end of your rope?
      I hear it really stretches if you use soap

      Delete
    2. well, I kinda live dangling by a thread.
      would be nice, though, to burn some calories in bed.
      lol....
      better than changing a tire
      and those fish bowls look kinda dire!
      ha.

      Delete
    3. Yeah you could suffocate
      with that fish bowl at your gate haha

      Delete
    4. Kinda looks like Jack
      going on the water glass attack! ha.

      Delete
    5. That would be a funny shot
      Sure he wouldn't like it a whole lot

      Delete
  29. orlin N cassie....

    once again...provin de burd iz stoooooooooopid, rood, noizee, bug infested anda caca dropper....

    wee purrson....sorree ya getted de burd lesson de hard way

    oh, N thanx for de suggestion bout fish bowls...frank lee we never thinked oh that and like duh...we could werk out and eat lunch...trout...at de same time !!!

    peace out N rock on a mega mackerull monday two all !

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yeah you could go right to town
      Never putting the fish bowl down
      As for the burds
      They are turds

      Delete
  30. How did they manage to catch the pigeon in action? I'm impressed!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. it is a set up I say
      Photoshop at play

      Delete
  31. That poor, poor little kid!
    How awful what that bird did!
    I exercise every day,
    But none of it in your way.
    I think sit-ups I'd rather do
    Than these workouts at your zoo,
    Although the ball balance does look cool;
    But I'd probably look like a fool.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I'd probably break my leg
      Walking around with a peg
      If I were to try that
      While it would be popped by the cat

      Delete
  32. The neck muscle thing would be easier and less painful.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yeah over quick too
      If done right for you

      Delete
  33. What's this leg exercise thing? In and out? LOL! :D That horse is flying, and whoa. What a Burger! :D

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. hahaha a good old in and out
      Won't make many pout

      Delete
  34. What an awful pigeon,
    The flying rat should be thrown in prison.
    I really need to stop coming by,
    When the moon sails high in the night sky.
    Tis not the best time for my rhymes,
    Then again, I suck at rhyming anytime.
    (:

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. haha at least you have an excuse
      You are suffering from sleep abuse
      But none you need
      As you can do the deed

      Delete
  35. Well, finally here at your zoo
    I had to see what you've been up to
    so you are an exercise guru
    there are some things here
    that I could never do...

    changing a tire, haven't a clue
    take out the cell call AAA
    for help, or just cry boo hoo
    while watching YouTube

    riding a horse now, that would be fun
    I'll ride, ride , ride with my head
    held high..lol..until I melt
    into the sun

    that's one giant burger but, I'm
    afraid if he eats that, he may need
    new attire..

    leg stretches can be fun
    and aerobic too, burn calories
    galore, just hope they don't
    fall on the floor...

    I think I'll stick to my regular
    routine, Pilates and Yoga
    and throw in some spinning
    and it's away I go, go, go..

    This was fun to read today at your show
    now, take a bow as you made us all laugh..











    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. what's with this giant gap..

      Delete
    2. That gap
      happens to people who yap
      Way to long
      With their rhyming song lol
      Actually no idea at all
      Seems to come and go at my hall
      And what no neck stretch
      You could play fetch
      And poor AAA
      I guess you make their day
      Unless you cry in their ear
      Then that may cause fear
      Drooling on them and blowing your snot
      That would be nasty a lot LOL
      yoga one day i will try
      When able under my sky
      Until then i'll stretch the neck
      And try not to wreck

      Delete
    3. Pat,

      No neck stretch for me at
      least not one of that kind
      that's quite the picture
      you drew of me crying yikes
      that might scare the car man
      away, and then I would be left
      there with a flat, thanks to
      your naughty cat..
      Yoga, you should try
      don't be shy..bend and stretch
      try a few poses..you can be
      a tree, or a mighty warrior
      they are relaxing, try them
      you will see...

      Delete
    4. Maybe you can hitch a ride
      With a handy boy scout guide
      Might earn him a badge too
      Crying, sobbing, you haha
      Oh I tried it
      But can't do it yet at my pit
      As my issues don't like stretching away
      Have to heal first at my bay

      Delete
    5. Pat,

      Yes, you need some rest
      that would be best
      before, you try to overdo
      take some time to heal
      you can still have fun at your zoo
      with all your rhyming words
      should we have a word sword duel
      lol..I can't even say that one
      a tongue twister for you mister
      maybe, that would be fun at your zoo
      find all those tongue twisters and
      put a spin on them in your own way..
      ok, I'm going away..bothered you
      enough for one day...

      may good dreams stream into your head while
      you lay in your bed...Good Night!

      Delete
    6. I already did the tongue twister thing
      A while back at my wing
      May have even done it twice
      It was nice
      To watch all squirm
      Like a worm
      and if i can get to sleep with this heat
      Hopefully I'll go down dream street
      And with that
      Good night from the cat

      Delete
  36. That elephant balancing on the ball
    is sure a challenge to us all
    Leg and body stretches are the best
    but no binging afterwards, though its a blast ~

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. yeah that can't be done
      Or you wasted the workout run

      Delete
  37. I joined a gym so I could get trim
    but I broke my toe and rarely go.
    Perhaps I should try running from birds?
    It's better exercise than wrangling words.

    VR Barkowski

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Ouch to the toe
      But you paid the dough
      So may as well go
      And row row row

      Delete
  38. For those who do the martial arts:
    Do your kicks
    And take your licks.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Or kick some hicks
      and throw some bricks

      Delete
  39. Stretching and burger eating
    Not good combination I think
    Can do well with some jogging
    That'll make one lanky and slim!
    If it comes to nothing
    The noose is an optional ending

    Hank

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yeah could let loose
      With the noose
      Or just run
      and continue to have fun

      Delete
  40. I like to go jogging
    to exercise my heart.
    But never get behind me
    cause when I run, I fart.



    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks for the heads up
      You must be followed by many a pup

      Delete
  41. Ewwwww, to the poop poop picture. Poor little kid. And yikes on that big-ass burger.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I wonder if a coupon came with that
      Could delight you mat haha

      Delete
    2. lol, a coupon. I was just reading your post you did right after this, but I couldn't think of a rhyme answer.

      Delete
    3. haha no need to rhyme
      It isn't such a crime

      Delete
  42. I like exercising Zumba
    Makes me sing Hakuna Matata like Timon and Pumba!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. haha do you say farted
      After you get down hearted

      Delete
  43. No noose is good noose
    Go and exercise with a moose
    Do some back flips with a goose
    Jog with a papoose
    Pull a caboose

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Or kick the caboose
      Of a moose
      While riding a goose
      Letting it all hang loose

      Delete
  44. Why are all the posts I am reading today referencing flat tires?? Is the universe laughing at me for getting a flat tire- not knowing it and then when I finally take it to go fix it have to get the damn thing ordered?!?!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. LOL someone is clearly not having a good day
      Don't blame me, this was written months ago at my bay

      Delete
  45. Yep, I just joined a gym
    Time to be fit and trim
    Hubby is coming along, too
    We're gonna zumba at our zoo
    Keep flexing those muscles, Pat
    You must stay pretty for the cat :)
    Oh, and tulips are coming your way
    Mailing next weekend to your bay
    Don't ever say a girl never
    Gave you flowers :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. hahaha now I can't say
      That at my bay
      and you joining a gym
      Not on a whim
      Is the best way to be
      Then it will actually be used by thee

      Delete
  46. Of course you know you are crazy
    but I know this isnt a problem here
    anyway I love the elephant there!:)))

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Not at all
      Love being crazy at my hall

      Delete
  47. I'm really bad at stretching. I get lazy after my run and can't be bothered. And I should know better. I have a MSc in exercise physiology. I obviously believe in the 'do as I say and not as I do mentality'. lol

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. LOL I am bad at it too
      But is should be done at every zoo

      Delete
  48. crossing a swell is swell
    actually stretching legs is a stretch
    these aren't rhymes
    just defective signs
    of an ass clencher
    and no viable censor

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. hahaha wow an ass clencher,
      Surely have to bench her

      Delete
  49. Yeah, I'll stretch those neck muscles. My life is so hectic now, and my fractured ankle blanched at the site of this title.

    .........dhole

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. haha yeah I can see h ow that would
      Better to just go wit the noose in your hood

      Delete
  50. I think I'll take the noose...

    ReplyDelete