Saturday, November 30, 2013

Take Note And Prepare To Quote!

Quotes are here, quotes are there. They are every friggin where. All one has to do to get quoted throughout the ages is to write something either confusing or obvious on some pages. The cat can do it to. Let me prove it to you.

Cement when hardened is hard to change.
Doesn't that one have range?
Damn, I am good.
Put that on bumper stickers I should.

A flashing light means you better beware.
I'm on a tear.
Gears may shift but need to be greased.
Don't you feel like you just got fleeced?

Currents always go back out.
See no need to pout.
The window is only as clear as you make it.
So shine and spit.

Think on it and you'll never get off it.
That one is sure to be a hit.
The hallway is narrow until you find the door.
See, just go out and explore.

The blind sleep in their own bed.
Damn, sucks to be a fluoride head.
Originality is a poor man's excuse.
Kiss my rhyming caboose.

Oops, I talked to myself there.
I bet you weren't aware.
Talking to yourself leads to a conversation worth hearing.
See, now you are all cheering.

Garbage is a word the lazy uses for of little use.
Let all that garbage hang loose.
The temperature of the room can be swayed by the heart.
Gag worthy, I'll go pass a fart.

If the deck you're dealt is rigged, play with a new deck.
You just have to open them up to check.
A spinning ball has no beginning or end.
My, cryptic with this one I send.

A movie star is nothing more than plastic held up be diapers.
That outta get to those pipping pipers.
Although that was a statement I think.
Still in your head it can sink.

A cushion is only as good as the ass that rides it.
Was that dirty a little bit?
Fan the flames and the scars will show.
Maybe even down below.

There we go that cat has given quotes a go. Now when your great great grand kids repeat the cat you can say you heard them here first at my mat. That is if you can talk when dead. Otherwise forget what I said. Now my quotes have come to pass with my ever so quotable little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Friday, November 29, 2013

It's In The Can, Man!

Ever hear the saying above? Seems that and much like it get some love. But you know most times it seems those who say such things are just trying to fleece you out of your stuff in your wings.

So it really is in the can, man.
Go out and get a tan.
Just leave me in control.
I promise not to be a mole.

The cats in the bag.
There will be no lag.
Trust in me.
But this advice isn't free.

It's a done deal.
This is for real.
So what if he didn't sign on the dotted line.
Give it another day and all will be divine.

Done and dusted.
In me you trusted.
I even cleaned it for you.
You can trust me, its true.

It is done like dinner.
That makes you a winner.
So don't be a sinner.
Take your chicken dinner.

It was over before it began.
Didn't even need another kick at the can.
This deal is so great.
It'll fill your plate.

Done up like a dog's dinner.
That could be a head spinner.
But don't listen to the words.
Instead listen to the singing birds.

You'll be laughing all the way to the bank.
The dough will go clickity clank.
You'll be as rich as a banker.
So trust me, you wanker.

The deal is cooking now.
It is going to really wow.
Just give me another day.
I will get you your pay.

It's a home run.
Ground rule doubles are no fun.
Instead you hit it over the wall.
Trust me and have a ball.

I guess the moral of the story is even with all this great idiom biz, don't count your chickens before they hatch. You may end up with a rotten batch. Now I will go pass some gas, which is more fruitful from my little rhyming ass.

Later all, have nice fall.

Thursday, November 28, 2013

Most Important Dates For You Here At My Zoo!

There are so many important dates out there that the cat has to just shout them out at my lair. With Christmas coming up and all. They need their date also shown on my wall.

First get your inner pervert ready,
Then some may drool steady.
January 8th is Male Watcher's Day.
Gawk at males on display.

January 23rd comes too soon.
It brings Measure Your Feet Day to each loon.
On February 7 be neighborly at your sea.
It's Wave All Your Fingers At Your Neighbor Day with glee.

February 9th can kiss my rear.
No Toothache Day is allowed to come near.
March 3rd though is grand.
If Pets Had Thumbs Day across the land.

March 8th I can do.
Bring on Be Nasty Day at my zoo.
But March 20th can stay far away from my rear.
Extraterrestrial Abductions Day gets no cheer.

April 2nd is Children's Book Day.
That sure works for my bay.
April 4th could also be fun,
When Walk Around Things Day is spun.

April 28th is kinda dumb though.
Kiss Your Mate Day at you show.
One whole day a year?
Is your mate a deer?

May 16th will get some love indeed,
As Love a Tree Day takes seed.
Hopefully it will factor into April 23rd's Lucky Penny Day,
And I won't see a bare ass humping a tree on display.

June 13th's Blame Someone Else Day will be great,
You can blame all for your fate.
Also first Friday the 13th of 2014.
Just an fyi from my scene.

July 14th will get, literally, a rise.
National Nude Day comes without a disguise.
July 31st you might not want to know.
It's Mutt's Day as they butt sniff to and fro.

August 27th they got lazy.
Just Because Day is kinda hazy.
And September 16th is the most thrilling of all.
Celebrate Collect Rocks Day and have a ball.

Those are just some of the many days awaiting you. Christmas just does not measure up now with them in view. Right? Can I get a might? Nope? I guess those days will just have to cope. No one will celebrate them in mass. Sorry E.T. you are not getting near my little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Wednesday, November 27, 2013

Tick Tick Tick Watch It Kick!

Everywhere you go it seems people are kickstarting this and that at their show. Some it sure does help as they give their little yelp. But then there are those who should do something else at their sea. So they will be helped out by little old me.

Forget kickstarter,
That is nothing but a farter,
Compared to what I got.
I'll get you out of your rut.

With stuff like these,
Funding will be a breeze.
Help a rich dick!
Doesn't that sound slick?

Feed my maid!
A golden sidewalk will be laid.
Fill my private yacht!
That will make all hot to trot.

Tip my dog!
That will be juicier than a brown log.
Just buy this!
That is pure bliss.

Pay my traffic ticket!
I bet it will even be funded by a cricket.
Fund my nose job!
Might even attract Sideshow Bob.

Football my backyard!
That will make buyers hard.
Martian funder!
That will bring the thunder.

Stoked, Dude!
After that how can you be rude?
Designer Car!
That will surely be above par.

Forget penny waste!
They'll give them over post haste.
Sign your life away!
You may have already done that the other day.

Stick it in my pocket!
That will get you enough to build a rocket.
Buy me lunch!
I bet you will get a bunch.

I saved the best for last.
This will make all a thing of the past.
Give Me Money!
That will even impress the Easter Bunny.

See, aren't my ideas so grand? I bet they could make a ton across the land. No? What do you know? I bet I could sell them to a singing bass. He would appreciate my little rhyming ass.

Later all, have nice fall.

Tuesday, November 26, 2013

A dVerse Gift So Your Spirits Will Lift!

So this time for dVerse we have to make sure you open your purse and get the right gift. You do want spirits to lift. Or maybe you just don't know. Well the cat will help you out at his show.

A is for Allie the gator and its very sharp snap.
Instead of chucking an enemy in a crator she'll eat the poor chap.
B is for bog, the best of the best.
Who doesn't like fog at their nest?

C is for camel and their mighty fine spit.
Give a ride to Mark Hamill and watch out for shit.
D is for door, as those you really need.
When some come to explore, a slam can take seed.

E is for electric bill, which is the greatest thing ever.
Stockings will surely fill with this great endeavor.
F is for Fraggle, they are just groovy.
Don't sit and haggle, just buy the movie.

G is for goop, the funniest of all.
Then your troop can run putting it all over the wall.
H is for hornet, not one who's green.
Your foe just torn it and he makes a scene.

I is for ice because it is so cool.
At a cheap price you won't look like a fool.
J is for junk, something so grand.
Grab a hunk from where they bury it in the land.

K is for kit kat, the one and only.
Go all tit for tat and no one will be lonely.
L is for loonie, the Canadian kind.
Or go big for a toonie and simply unwind.

M is for moon, the kind can be either or.
Lasso the big one like a loon or yank and explore.
N is for night, the simplest of all.
When in the light, say their gift is nightfall.

O is for offer, a cars salesmen's dream.
Be a fake cougher and pretend gifts will stream,
P is for prunes, they are oh so good.
They'll fill up sand dunes with way more than dry wood.

Q is for quilt to keep them all snug.
But they may wilt when on it they see your mug
R is for roar and you might want to drink.
Let your voice soar then watch as they blink.

S is for slinky, that loveable toy.
Even all dinky it brings so much joy.
T is for tears, bottle them up.
Then you'll hear cheers when drunk from a cup.

U is for utter, it could be from whatever.
They may stutter at you being so clever.
V is for van which will make all shout.
Not some flash in the pan, you want to start popping them out.

W is for world, give it to all.
Toes may go curled when they look at the ball.
X is for xi, write it down on paper.
Then ad a qi and they'll pull a Scrabble caper.

Y is for yahoo, the scream you give out.
Then an empty box opens and all pout.
Z is for Zapped Again, one movie had to show.
Of course trapped at your den you may feel as it is given a go.

Now hasn't the cat helped you out a ton? These will make your gifts oh so fun. At least for someone watching on. Some might get banished to the back lawn. Hopefully it is warm with green grass and not snow covered, which is hated by my little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Monday, November 25, 2013

A Tweet All Should Delete!

Thanks to Folklore keeping it real and spinning the wheel, the cat saw it and had to give it a go. Warning, you may lose a few IQ points from reading those below.

Wow, just wow.
To you I give a bow.
Can't even make a blonde joke.
Even dumb blondes on that would choke.

So people with dyed hair sleep,
And those who don't creep?
New type of zombie about?
Died people have such clout.

Yep, a big state.
With Canadian bacon on a plate.
That was invented by Americans too.
Probably by someone as dumb as you.

Oh yes.
I must confess.
Coming from a spoiled rich kid.
That statement sure has my bid.

Axis you say?
Spokesperson at your bay.
Preach the axis everywhere,
And soon it will come to pass at your lair.

Yeah, because meteors = global warming.
Outer space is storming.
Oh no!
Space objects are caused by mother nature you know.

Hmm dinosaurs may take offense,
Are you like them and dense?
I hope you don't cut,
And try to remove that gut.

Hmm ummm errr and then some.
Can anyone be that dumb?
If on there they got Twitter.
Do I leave you bitter?

Ummm dumb times two.
Some people have no clue
But it is such a rare sight,
For twins to have the same birthday, right?

Try try again.
There at your den.
Eventually you'll get it right.
Or walk away in spite.

So there you go. We are all now dumber for looking at such a show. These type of humans make the cat like dogs, they are smarter even if they eat umm logs. That is pretty bad. These people should never leave their pad. Or be locked away in mass so their dumbness does not come in sight of my little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Sunday, November 24, 2013

A Saying Not Worth Displaying!

So way back when at my den, the cat stumbled upon a saying that he used for another displaying, and it spurred this post, with Betsy going on about it too at my coast. But it was all me, not her at my sea.

Not to mention...
Gets some attention.
For you may say it,
But out the words you will spit.

May I take a seat...
You ask as you greet.
When really you are going to sit,
No matter if they throw a fit.

I'm not supposed to tell...
But you still give a yell.
Such a blabber mouth.
Maybe your face will get a growth.

With all due respect...
Respect you neglect.
Going to say it any way,
Respect be damned at your bay.

Bless her little heart...
Means she is a slow fart,
Belonging on the people of wal mart,
Pushing a shopping cart.

Stays behind closed doors...
Means let's go do chores,
Out of ear shot,
And I'll blabber a whole lot.

Did you hear...
Then comes fear.
Whether you heard it or not,
You will soon be taught.

Waiting with bated breath...
Means you'd rather have death,
But are humoring them,
So they don't flem.

Can I have your blessing...
Well we are confessing,
I just went and did it anyway.
Whether or not you think it is okay.

No strings attached...
Means we aren't matched,
But what the hell,
Let's humpty hump for a spell.

Those are just some of the many that popped in as I gave them a spin. Humans always feeling the need to say such stupid things at their feed, when really they are going to do it anyway come what may. I won't let any of them come to pass and still wiggle away with my little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Saturday, November 23, 2013

Away They Crow Ho Ho Ho!

The cat was lounging about when he heard a shout. I looked out the patio door and it was those two fools once more. I bet from the title you can guess who. They were both there dressed as Santa outside my zoo. Gung being rather large fit the bill well. Ho, well at least he could ring the bell.

"Do you think Santa will notice, Gung? I am about to pop a lung."

"Ho, just keep on ho ho hoing. The real Santa will be showing."

"You really think this is the year he finds me? I bet I get the biggest Christmas tree."

"He goes ho ho ho every year. He is searching for you and hopes you are near."

The two actually thought Santa was calling for Ho each year when he let his Christmas cheer flow. How stupid can a pair be? Very stupid, silly me.

'Ho, look there is Santa in disguise."

"Gung, he is covered in flies. Are you sure that is him?"

"He is just hiding and has let his Christmas lights dim."

The pair ran across the street, Gung holding tight on his collection plate, ready to meet and greet. I guess Santa's disguise is to be a bum. He was sure sucking back the rum.

"Santa, I am here. You have looked for me every year."

"Ho, you have finally been found. Come on Santa, let's hear a ho ho hoing sound."

The two stood over the guy as he began to snore. They quickly started to bore. They tapped him on the head. They even yanked his beard, thinking he was dead.

"We may be too late, Ho. Looks like Santa has suffered a fatal blow."

"Gung, this can't be. Santa has always been looking for me. We can't lose now. We have to wake him up some how. Santa needs to tell my why he yells my name as he flies through the sky."

The pair splashed water on his face. They yelled and danced in place. That was a sight I would like to erase from my mind. I guess they did a dance of some kind. Then with a twinkle in his eye. The drunk turned out to be rather spry. He hopped to his feet and stole Gung's collection plate, running away at an alarming rate.

"Santa stole my money!"

"Gung, this is not funny."

"Santa is always calling you, Ho. Because he wants to rob you with his twinkling glow."

"Santa is a thief. Good grief."

The two took off yelling at the drunk. But he had far too much spunk. They would never going to catch him. Boy, their lights are pretty dim. But at least they gave to the needy, who was really speedy. Maybe one day their stupidity will pass. Although I would not bet on it with my little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Friday, November 22, 2013

A Merry Date Could Be Your Fate!

I had to go and have a look to see what I could make fun of at my nook. There are plenty to choose from, they must already be drunk on the rum.

Here comes Mary Santa Claws
Keep away those paws.
Rudolph won't make you glow like me.
So are you saying a reindeer causes glee?

Find me under the missletoe.
I hope kaboom you don't go.
Vrooom goes my mind.
Not judging by the size of your behind.

Stuke n towne al aloan.
Do you make Al groan?
Maybe you can come put up my lights?
I hate manual labor and heights.

Want to see my bag of toys?
I have a feeling they are for bad boys.
Sack me
Ummm football fan are we?

Riddles are not my strung point.
Maybe put down the joint.
Current affairs are all I want on TV.
My, what a pervert you are at your sea.

Cats in christmas clothes are so cute.
I would throw you down the garbage chute.
Let jingle all the way home.
To cold to jingle while I roam.

Snuggle with me by the tire.
Well I guess a rubber must really light your fire.
Badder things could happen then me.
Gooder things may as well at ones sea.

My magic eight ball said I would get lucky.
I hope all is just ducky.
Fishing animals liquor bathes are my favorite things.
You have some strange fetishes and flings.

Drool all you like.
My OCD tells you to take a hike.
Strip away the bad stuff and love the cood.
Hmm a cod may find that a bid odd.

I see you.
Peeper number two.
Clingy, negative, pessimistic, fat, lazy, unemployed, whiners need not apply.
So after you say all of that will you poke them in the eye?

That is it for another round of dating nuts that can be found. If you want one I can go back and look then send them straight to your nook. I bet you would love a tire snuggling lass about as much as my little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Thursday, November 21, 2013

Rules For The Day At My Bay!

You know there are rules for this and there are rules for that. But all are ignored by the cat. Yet there are some that just come anyway. I'll let you in on them today.

The rule of the cat,
The rule of the dog.
One will squash you flat,
The other, eat a brown log.

The rule of the truck,
The rule of the car.
One can be out of luck,
The other can go far.

The rule of the male,
The rule of the female.
One will always fail,
The other will need bail.

The rule of the house,
The rule of the alley.
One will eat the mouse,
The other set it free in the valley.

The rule of the movie,
The rule of TV.
One pretends to be groovy,
The other claims to be reality.

The rule of the sea,
The rule of the land.
One will drown thee,
The other pounds sand.

The rule of the tune,
The rule of the quiet.
One leads to swoon,
The other stops a Ghostbuster riot.

The rule of the hand,
The rule of the foot.
One helps you stand,
The other never stays put.

The rule of love,
The rule of hate.
Both make you wear a glove,
Just some at a different rate.

The rule of this,
The rule of that.
You do not want to miss,
What comes from the cat.

How were those for the rules of the day? Did you already know them at your bay? I just had to make them come to pass. I guess there are a few I follow with my little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Wednesday, November 20, 2013

Two Light Hearted Fools Find Peace in Greece?

This Thanksgiving, at least for those down be low, us Canadians have already been there done that you know, Bora Bora once more comes into view. These two really have no clue.

Fortune cookies you say?
For those do you actually pay?
Bring about a day,
With a single cliche.

Find peace too?
Who even knew?
Is there such a thing,
At any wing?

The cat is confused,
And still feels abused.
The white fluffy thing,
Is so not like me at my wing.

But I suppose being fake,
It can survive an earthquake.
Or an alien probe,
Above the globe.

So away we go once more,
As the two light hearted fools explore.
Irish Air gets a look.
Thanks to a fake book.

Wow, every time I say what next will come, these two drink more rum. Who knows what will come next down the pipe, maybe a dinosaur of some type? I guess we will just have to see what comes to pass next time with them and the fake representation of my little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Tuesday, November 19, 2013

dVerse April Fools Are Here In November I Fear!

It just has to be a joke watching you humans as you choke over a whole dollar off. Did your brains get left in some horse trough? At least you are dVerse as many surely curse.

It has to be April fools.
Look at this sale on tools.
I'll stab you in the eye,
If you take my 3rd pair of pliers, guy.

Oh look it's a towel.
Let's all give a howl.
It is only a buck.
Touch it and I'll whack you like a hockey puck.

A big TV.
That causes me glee.
55 inch is so hard to see.
I really need 60.

Get out of my way.
I was first here yesterday.
I stood here all night.
Hypothermia is no fright.

Do I look like I care,
That I am walking around in my underwear?
Touch those clothes,
And I'll break your toes.

I really need that candy.
It will come in handy.
10 cents off is great.
I'll be ready for next Halloween at this rate.

Touch the last cream corn,
And you'll wish you were never born.
Redneck Folklore will pun you to death.
Or at least until she loses her breath.

Taking all the cat food.
That is just rude.
Wait, it is the same price.
You got beat twice.

Get out of my way.
I need that toy today.
Who cares if I could've got it last week.
I would rather fight over it with a geek.

I am king of the mountain.
I get the two dollar fountain.
This thing truly rules.
I only wish it were April fools.

Oh what you humans do to save a buck or two, when really a lot of it is crap. But one falls for it like a sap. I'll sit home like a smart feline and just shop online. You never know though what might show. If you gloat you may find a lass with gas among the mass,who passes the gas to disperse the mass. Then you can pass. Just a tip from my little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Monday, November 18, 2013

Clap Your Hands And Stomp Your Feet To The Bohlingaringding Beat!

Can you say that three times fast? Even one may give your tongue quite the blast. So what is a Bohlingaringding you ask? Are you sure you are up to the task?

Bohlingaringding's come in all shapes,
Some even look like grapes.
They are all rather odd.
So just give your head a nod.

Go with it!
Bohlingaringding's will be a hit.
But that is not the only class,
When they come out in mass.

Stuperhingalingdings join the fun.
Peeperingalinglings won't be out done.
Chipalingaringlings like to play.
Burgningalingdings will have their say.

That is just some of the ones,
That come out to shake their buns.
Joining in their yearly parade.
A sight that will surely never fade.

I guess they like Christmas time.
So they dance in their prime.
Now join the Bohlingaringding beat.
Clap your hands and stomp your feet.

Click here to have a peer.

The Bohlingaringding's think they are so cool. With ringing bells they surely think they rule. At least they will never be able to sneak up on you. Does that make it better at your zoo? I know their name is one big long mass. But that is so fun for my little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Sunday, November 17, 2013

On The Case Out in Space!

So dVerse wants us to go all sci fi today at our bay. That the cat can do, easily at his zoo. Although they say the bar is tended by aliens today. If they are probing I will burn down their dVerse bay.

Aliens on planet Zilicka have been found.
They sure are not tall or round.
Their eyes are in their hands.
They can make new teeth from desert sands.

They can fly with some weird feet.
Their lips look anything but sweet.
They are a color we have never scene.
They look oh so very mean.

Grab a bomb and a spike,
How can such creepy things we like?
Lets drop a bomb on their alien head,
Then stab them to make sure they are dead.

Next we'll hunt them all down.
They won't invade our town.
They are so nasty and mean,
They would make our streets unclean.

Let's keep some alive though.
We have to see what makes them glow.
Strap them down and dissect.
They are no better than an insect.

Oh and by the way,
We will take over their bay.
There we can mine and find,
Things that will help human kind.

Not to mention make us rich.
But these aliens would make you itch.
Their evil stare would make your body glitch,
And they scream at a very high pitch.

We are so above them,
And their alien flem.
So we deserve it all.
Make them a trophy on our wall.

They were going to invade us after all.
We heard their warrior alien call.
They were coming here,
To probe us in the rear.

So everyone give a cheer.
We have saved our Earthly sphere,
From the planet Zilicka alien race,
Who were voted most peaceful race in all of space.

If the cat were an alien he would steer clear of this place. Humans would just dissect or blow up at a steady pace. If aliens are ever found it will be to blow us off our dirt mound. The wise ones will just stay the hell away and never show themselves at our bay. Beats having humans put them in the grass. That is all from my little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Saturday, November 16, 2013

Really Hate, I Mean Really At My Gate!

This one is more Pat than the cat but I agree with him at my mat, so the cat can rant away about that nasty bay. One look at that medieval death trap of a place and they would suffer my claw embrace.

Sit in a chair,
Hearing humans blare.
Like torture is upon them,
Spitting lots of flem.

Sure isn't a thrill,
When out comes the drill.
Burrowing into your mind,
I wonder what they will find?

But then some sucky thing,
Can be heard beginning to sing.
Know where they can shove that,
At their torture mat.

When out comes the needle,
I want to use you as a treadle.
Stick my foot in your face,
Leaving an imprint to trace.

Then you try and talk,
As above me you gawk?
Really? What is with that?
Want me to hit you with a bat?

Scrape me once more,
And there will be no encore.
I'll bite down hard.
You'll be a four fingered bard.

And with your poison crap,
I'll blow you off the map.
Take that and shove it,
Your fluoride shit.

Have you guessed yet?
Are you on to the pet?
Not just yet?
Don't fret.

For they charge a ton.
For their torture fun.
Even giving you a smile,
That seems so vile.

But if your a kid,
You get a sticker of a squid.
Or maybe some wax string.
My, don't you feel like a king?

Guess half way through? I know for a few it is true. Hate that evil dentist place. Not sure a single person alive likes such an embrace. Thankfully no pain though, except parting with the dough. And I said I would bite if fluoride came into my sight. That was well and crass so they kept that away from my little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Friday, November 15, 2013

A Safe Bet It's A Threat!

You know they say if you're going to threaten someone make it good. But does it really matter in one's hood? For many a threat is just that. It is something you will never do at your mat.

I am going to kick your ass.
You say it with such class.
You even beat the poor sap up to.
But you never kicked him where he uses a loo.

If I see you again I will kill you.
Has surely come due.
But that never takes place.
Unless one is a nutcase.

I will send you packing.
Something about that one is lacking.
Why would I want to pack?
Better to threaten with a thumbtack.

I will hit you with my car.
Unless drunk at a bar,
That will not come due.
Especially if inside a building at your zoo.

If you don't do that you will be fired.
After you are long past hired.
Another empty one that comes due,
With no fat to chew.

I will throw you out the window.
Meanwhile you are a foot above the ground at your show.
That really is some threat.
Plus most weigh more than a pet.

I will never watch your movie again.
Many say at their den.
To a person who can't even hear them at all.
Then at the next one they are again at the movie hall.

I will put you in detention.
That sure deserves a mention.
Hearing it a time or ten.
But it rarely came due at my den.

I will clean your clock.
That would be a shock.
First I have to have clock.
But you can shine the lock.

Take the trash out or no sex.
That one can convex.
But just in case the trash will go.
No since tempting fate so things will not grow.

Now you see how threats are dumb in a way with my hum. But they do make one feel better at times with their threatening chimes. Maybe I should threaten that if any trespass, I will pass gas on them with my little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Thursday, November 14, 2013

Glitch Of A Witch Part Sixteen. Zombie Betsy Is Queen!

We decided it was best to run away and live to fight another day. But before we could turn to run along came Thinkingcap, the ass, and we knew this was not going to be fun. Freaky Betsy and her zombie horde were coming from one way and Thinkingcap was coming from the other with her donkey like display. They began to squabble over us to. But then this was nothing new.

"My zombie horde will tear you apart. Touch my spoils and you will lose your heart."

"They will all see clearer being stuck in my mirror."

"Drazin would rather not watch a freaky cat fight, no offense, Fleabags."

Freaky Betsy commanded her zombie horde to come after us, they moaned and slowly waded through the dead WorqueenDan puss. They were lead by Gloria and Brian. I knew the gawker liked back woods fryin. But would he really eat a cat? I was not going to find out and was prepared to squash his mohawk flat.

"Drazin still blames you fleabags for all of this."

"If you weren't such a godly mook, we'd have been out of here ages ago."

"Time to die. I'll chow down on your eye."

Freaky Betsy wanted to eat my eye? We had to make her die. Thinkingcap just neighed and raised her front legs to the sky. She must have a big rump as she didn't raise them very high. We were surrounded on top hard candy by her zombie horde and then we heard the sound of someone pulling a rip cord.

"Bryan, what do you call a flying drunk in the rain?"

"A beer in a shower?"

"Damn, you finally got one!"

"Drazin thinks Drazin is going to be sick."

Yeah, the beer guys were parachuting down from the sky with Thinkingcap giving them the evil eye. It looked like it was raining to, but then we heard from another and saw it was really drool that was coming due.

"Annnneeeeeeeeeeeeee. It is bad enough I was reborn through their ass. But now they are drooling on me."

"The whiny blue freak is back, along with the Irish and a couple of beer idiots. Drazin really can't catch a break."

Everyone continued to look up, astonished at Terry, Theresa and Rosey, the three headed pup. That is when Anne gave an evil smile and turned some sort of dial. She held some electrical looking box in her hand and kept smiling as she dropped into candy land.

"Stay off the ground, eejits."

The box hit the ground and electricity flew everywhere. It seems the puss of dead WorqueenDan was conductive at the candy land lair. The zombies, freaky Betsy and even Thinkingcap the ass all screamed like a little two year old girlie lass. They then melted into puddles of goo like the wicked witch. Poor Brian and Gloria were casualities of freaky Betsy's high pitch. But I guess you can't save them all. And now all that remained were the good guys at the candy land hall. Thinkingcap's mirrors busted and all were free. Too bad the ground was full of puss and goo, it was so nasty.

"Annnnnnneeeee, I think I got some of Freaky Betsy on my shoe."

"Brandon, what do you call zombie on a shoe?"

"Zombie shoe?"

"Dead foot."

"Drazin has to get away from these lame people."

"I agree, Demon."

The three headed mutt stood drooling behind us while Drazin, Pat, Anne, Old One Eye and The Beer Guys stood in the land of goo and puss. Cassie and I remained on top hard candy, getting our fur full of that would not be dandy. Then a glowing sphere appeared in the sky and as it began to float down we hoped it was not going to make us fry.

"Drazin is so sick and tired of this place. Drazin demands you take us home."

"Bryan, is he talking to himself?"

"Maybe he is hard of hearing."

They all shut up, even one eye, who wiped the drool off of herself from the three headed pup. We just watched the glowing thing fall closer and closer to us all, hoping it would be our ticket out of this hell hole and back to our hall.


So is this the end? Or another beginning of some new trend? I guess we will have to wait and see. At least we no longer have to deal with freaky Betsy. RIP Brian and Glory Dear. I try to have sympathy for you but you did try to eat my rear. Now another edition has come to pass. We shall have to wait and see what is next for my little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Wednesday, November 13, 2013

Seventeen Comes Due And They Still Have A Loose Screw!

Here we go once more with the search engine nuts at my shore. I guess this will always be as they surely find me. But it allows for some fun. So away we go under my sun.

"chicken nuggets drawing"

They are stealing Betsy's work today. I'm sure numb tongue will make them pay.

"does 39 and time rhyme"

Umm no. Unless you talk in tongues at your show.

"sweetmook goat"

What is that? Some kind of crossbred gnat?

"beethoven the the third when they go camping"

A bit of a stutter I see. But glad the classics and peeing behind a tree give you glee.

"hairy man tits"

Boy, have you come to the wrong place. I would have liked to see the look on your face.

'furry hairy snow moon boobs"

Umm err is there such a thing? I can't wait for spring.


Are you trying to play some strange game of connect four? With you on a connecting tour?

"fart books ipad"

A customer I see. Hope A Fart Apart was fun for thee.

"i'm not in a good mood please don't dis"

So you are telling Google you are in a bad mood? Was Facebook giving you attitude?

"My left hand can't work as hard as my"

I am glad you did not finish that. Some things should not be known by the cat.

"Date me please good miss molly"

Ummm errr I will give you a good golly. Go enjoy your blown up dolly.

"Yankees in my pants"

Wow, that has to be strange. Maybe you should drop trough and change?

"Wiggled too far too the left too much"

I do not want to know where you wiggle. Too much too even get a well timed giggle.

'The walls are watching me"

As long as they don't talk let them gawk.

And the winner for today with this strange search engine display, really thinks they are great. I mean they must eat off of a golden plate. Warning it is a bit crass. So go now if you wish to pass.

Wonderful, My Shit is Roses, Yours Is Shit

All I can do is shake my head. That person should never get out of bed. How is it any different when it comes out the other end? Maybe you all have some advice for this nut you wish to send. Could sit and shoot the shit. Could bring forth a shit storm or be a hit. I am done being punny and crass. Enjoy the nuts that find my little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Tuesday, November 12, 2013

A dVerse Disney Sight Will Take Flight!

So a long long time ago in a dVerse far away, they went all Disney at their bay. With the cat so far ahead it took a while to put this one to bed. Or at least for it to show. Anyway, away we go.

Would you be a Lady with a Tramp,
If you went and rubbed a magic lamp?
Things may not be so Snow White,
Any longer at your heigh ho work site.

But if you lived under the sea.
I guess a bibbity bobbity boo would not hurt thee.
Even Tiger's being the only one.
Still need to have some Little Mermaid fun.

Everybody wants to be a cat.
Even Jafar knew that.
Not sure with the hunchback of Notre Dame.
But I bet Hercules could keep him calm.

Goliath might not like that though.
So The Lion King may show.
All Circle of Life,
Unless a sword in a stone causes you strife.

Give it to a fox and a hound.
Unless Dumbo is around.
He'll take it to the jungle book.
Pochanotas may steal it like a crook.

Sleeping Beauty won't cause you any harm.
Beauty and the Beast may raise an alarm.
But come be our guest.
I bet Robin Hood would forget the rest.

Unless Kermit puts it to song.
Then Mulan will even sing it in Hong Kong.
But I'll sure make a man out of you.
Just like Oliver and Company do.

Then I'll have 101 Dalmations bite your rear.
Just sing Hakuna Matata and have no fear.
Might make for A Goofy Movie at your show.
The Rescue Rangers could save you though.

I would not count on the Gummi Bears.
They are bouncing here there and everywhere.
Kinda like Tarzan in that way.
Or Lilo and Stitch by the bay.

This was not Universal tales.
Or Fox and its fails.
Dreamworks also had no wails.
It was just Ducktales.

There you go another Disney flow at my show. Did any song get stuck in your head and cause you dread? That is always fun to do, whoo hoo. Now I am through with my Disney pass. You've got a friend in my little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Monday, November 11, 2013

Cup Along To The Song!

It seems that mini me just won't stay away. He is bound and determined to have his say. This time he wants to play with cups. I see this going bad and having no ups.

The cup song,
Oh so wrong.
Banging cups around,
On the table or ground.

Away you humans bang,
Giving off a clang.
At least you do it in sync.
Sometimes you even blink.

The mini me struggled though,
As you can see from the show.
His thumbs aren't very good.
I think he's made of wood.

Could not pick up the cup.
He's as useless as a pup.
Just pushing them around.
At least there was no clanging sound.

So away we go,
With another mini me show.
Could be a hit,
As you Cup It!

So are you all cupped out? Got a cup when out and about? A cup can be grand to those not snip snip across the land. In case of a kick to such a mass you will be protected and not neglected. Hey, beats a singing bass. but no cup is needed for my little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Sunday, November 10, 2013

I'll Toy With You A Time Or Two!

So dVerse wants the cat to toy around. But my toys are always found. You have balls on a string, balls that spin in some tack thing, tennis balls too and furry balls at my zoo. Toys for a cat, don't go gutter at your mat. I guess we'll ignore those as the cat might start curling toes.

Creepy crawlers can be made,
Those suckers you can trade.
They are sticky though.
Oh, and you can throw.

They're heroes in the half shell.
They are so green and swell.
100's on the table.
Nope, not a fable.

Kick the can.
I was a fan.
Kicked it and ran.
Not a flash in the pan.

Monopoly tycoon.
Still a loon.
I did not cheat.
All just suffered defeat.

Lego by the bucket.
Coloring can suck it.
I want the blocks.
Hurts when tramped on in socks.

Pots and pans.
I got no fans.
Was told to pack it,
Didn't like my racket.

Nintendo on the scene.
Mario is so mean.
Picking on the monkey,
Boy, he looked funky.

Jenga is up.
Damn that pup.
Her friggin tail,
Makes it a fail.

Rocks on a lake.
Give them a shake.
Away they fly.
Skipping to the sky.

Stuffed animals at the foot of the stairs.
They gave me evil glares.
But I jumped from the top,
Landing in them wasn't a flop.

They just popped in when digging into the past toy bin. Hey, beats furry balls I guess. Pat could really make a mess. He did not even have to clean up the toy mass. He had the life of my little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Saturday, November 9, 2013

Tomorrow Is Found At Your Ground?

You hear it every day as many people like to repeat it at their bay. Tomorrow is another day or some version of that is what they say. But that is a load of crap. I will show you why without rhyming lap.

Tomorrow it will come.
Unless you drink poison rum.
Tomorrow will be here.
Not if you die of fear.

Tomorrow I will cuss.
Not if you get hit by a bus.
Tomorrow will come around.
Not if you fall and whack your head on the ground.

Tomorrow I will clean my shack.
Not if you have a heart attack.
Tomorrow I will buy a car.
Not if hit by a drunk from a bar.

Tomorrow I'll learn to do this or that.
Not if a piano squashes you flat.
Tomorrow I'll do the work.
Wait! That one may be a perk.

Tomorrow my ship will come.
Not if you choke on a plum.
Tomorrow I will take a break.
Not if you drown in a lake.

Get the drift yet?
Aren't I a smart pet?
For there is no telling,
With your tomorrow yelling.

You can plan up the ying yang,
But tomorrow's bell may never clang.
A sudden turn and poof it's over.
Stands for human, cat or rover.

Chances are it will come,
For most not always drunk on rum.
But putting things off day after day,
Will get lost along the way.

Then that one tomorrow you decide to do it.
You get chopped up bit by bit.
All due to the path set out,
With which you did nothing about.

So why so much tomorrow,
When it clearly could bring sorrow?
Maybe it is just the life of a slacker.
Tomorrow I may give Polly a cracker.

Or the cat will just eat the bird today. See, so much better to do it here and now at your bay. Obviously you can't do everything in one day. There is just no way. But why let things sit? Are you a tomorrow person at your pit? But never fear for another rhyme is near. Being so far ahead one will come to pass, whether or not tomorrow is seen by my little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Friday, November 8, 2013

Don't Budge As You Go Before The Judge!

So we did the judge a while back. Now let's go on the plaintiff attack. They are some strange folks indeed. At least the ones all about the greed.

 First we have the bubble popper.
You better call a crime stopper.
Pop my bubbles and I'll sue,
Because you made me turn blue.

Then there is the screamer.
They are more than a day dreamer.
You made my ear drums blow.
I want damages wrapped in a bow.

 Of course there is the pooch.
Who all say is as big as Hooch.
He tore a hole in my pants.
I need them fixed before they house ants.

Then there is the drunk.
Who got into quite the funk.
They can't remember what they did.
But they still want to get their bid.

 Here is a double feature,
With this elusive creature.
The streaker and the druggie.
He ran off with your buggy.

 Then oh no!
He ran over your toe.
Before crashing it into a lake.
What? My story isn't fake.

You hurt my eyes.
That was not wise.
Your public display of affection,
Caused me pain and suffering from your erection.

See it is right there.
All you have to do is stare.
Then you got physical with me.
That did not cause me glee. 

 And you need to be sued.
You ripped off the jolly fat dude.
Ruining Christmas for kids everywhere.
You forgot the beard and did not bring a spare.

Finally you have the dummy.
Is that the guy from The Mummy?
Nope, but which one is the dope?
Neither of them have any hope.

There you go. In a weird way you got the plaintiffs that decide to show. Did you know they don't even lose anything on those shows? No matter if they killed their neighbors favorite crows. They each get $5000 bucks for being on there and whatever is granted to them for their legal affair, gets taken out of the others pay. So with $10,000 you could walk away. Want to make up a fake fight and get some dough? I'll come and step on your toe. Then we could get paid in mass. It sure works fine for my little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Thursday, November 7, 2013

Glitch Of A Witch Part Fifteen. WorqueenDan Makes A Scene!

There we were falling back to candy land. The place that none of us can really stand. I would rather play the dumb board game, at least that will not maim. I was hoping we would stop in thin air like at the Island of the Gawker lair. But I knew that was not a probable action, at least we would be dead and not in traction.

"Oh Drazin is not going to like this."

"Demon, I am with you on that one."

"How disgusting!"

We saw the ground coming ever closer and there was something much bigger than a mouser. It was WorqueenDan and I think I'd rather get crushed in the blades of a fan than what was about to occur. I was really going to have to lick my fur.

"Get out here you zombie freak! That half jack ass better show herself too."

WorqueenDan was screaming at those below the ground. He could have quickly got down if he wasn't so round. Round is putting it too nice though. He was so big if he stepped in front of the sun it would no longer glow. And of course he had his ass in the air and its crack was giving off quite the glare.

"Ouch! Damn fleas."

WorqueeenDan scratched his ass, as in the crack Drazin and Pat fell, but not me and Cass. I know bad grammar there but I just don't care. We bounced off his cheek and scratched him as he continued to speak. With all that blubber though it barely tickled our candy loving foe. WorqueenDan then let out a big fart and away flew Pat and Drazin out of such a part. Thankfully they weren't covered in anything. Unlike old one eye nothing decided to cling.

"If you Fleabags ever speak of this, Drazin will make you into slippers and then set you on fire."

"Demon, I will make sure they stay quiet."

"Who'd believe you got sucked up into a giant's ass anyway?"

WorqueenDan turned around before we could scatter and I think, if possible, he had gotten even fatter. That is when I formed a plan to rid ourselves of Worqueendan. I knew we could not run away because with one step he moved a mile across the bay. So we did the only thing we could do. The others caught on to my plan as I jumped up on his shoe.

"Hey there Dan.
You need a tan.
If you didn't block out the sun.
I bet you'd have more fun.

But at that there is little chance.
So I'll do a little dance,
And help you out a bit.
So you can get fit."

"Shut up cat.
I'll squash you flat.
And eat you too.
That much is true"

"That you may do.
But not before I chew,
And eat this yummy candy.
This one is so dandy."

I pranced about candy land and pretended all the candy was grand, even though most of it was crap. But that is the same on any map. He fell for my trick. Damn, I am slick. He snatched the candy from me and ate it up, refusing to share like a greedy pup.

"Drazin loves this one."

"I could eat these all day."

"I must maintin my figure but even a prissy cat likes these."

Drazin, Cassie and Pat joined in. WorqueenDan was snatching each one away at the candy land bin. No matter how many we went to, he grabbed them and began to chew. We tried our best to stay out of his way but he was getting larger with each passing second of the day. Of course that was my plan and within ten minutes there was no more WorqueenDan.

"He's gonna blow!"

"Drazin already seen his ass once, never again."

"Agreed, Demon."

We jumped behind a tree and shelter ourselves with some hard kind of candy. WorqueenDan rumbled and tumbled all around making it feel like an earthquake as he hit the ground. I thought I just gave him a heart attack but then he began to clackity clack. Then like some exploding gigantic mushroom Worqueendan went boom!

"WorqueenDan guts, yuck."

That was the thought of every one of us. It was so disgusting, as most of nearby candy land looked like a huge ball of puss. But at least that was one foe down. Now just Betsy the zombie freak and that Thinkingcap ass from crazy town. Speaking of which before I can even scratch an itch, Half zombie Betsy popped up from her lair giving some sort of shrieking blare. Her zombie followers popped up one by one. at least now WorqueenDan no longer blocked out the sun.


Can you imagine falling into a giant's ass? That is just so crass. Thankfully Cassie and I avoided such a thing. No need for that type of fling. Now we have to find a way to stop Betsy and her zombie horde. At least in candy land we are never bored. But if I were you there I would never trespass. Trust my little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Wednesday, November 6, 2013

Cat VS Ninja Wannabe Today At My Sea!

So when Buy My Books came to pass by the thing with a hand up its ass, the ninja wannabe said his mini me would win at his tree. The cat had to put that to the test. We all have to know who is the best.

Once and for all,
Here at my hall,
We shall see,
With this spree,

Who is tops,
And who flops.
The puppet vs the cardboard thing,
Any bets at your wing?

One has no ass.
The other wears the pajamas of a lass.
One is large,
The other small, but has a mighty charge.

Can itty bitty,
Win out in this ditty?
Or will helping hand,
Burying him in the sand?

I guess you can hit play,
And find out today.
If you aren't insecure now,
You may be after this meow.

So what do you think? Did the fight end the way you thought at your rink? How does this relate to insecure you may ask with my little video task. Well it is simple as can be, don't take yourself so seriously. If you don't have some fun, you may still get things done. But it will drain you and make you hate it. Who needs that shit? Mini Ninja Wannabe sure doesn't need crap to come to pass. He has plenty of that after being buried in the litter box of my little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Tuesday, November 5, 2013

A dVerse Rhyme I Have Not Done For A Time!

So for dVerse today I think I will hit play. This may go on a while. So the run time could stretch a mile. We shall see what I pull from the pile as I turn up the movie dial.

You might be stating O Brother Where Art Thou? before I'm through.
For a great big mental Breakdown I may give you.
Tell the Newsies all about it.
You have Nothing to Lose at your pit.

Could make it all the way to Detroit Rock City.
But if it is Judgment Night that may be a pity.
Especially because White Men Can't Jump.
Unless they use Grease or leg hump.

At least they are out of the Rat Race.
So Club Dread they can embrace.
Unless Uncle Buck decides to join in.
Aladdin may think that is a sin.

Turner and Hooch may not though.
With a Fast Five away they may go.
But watch out for The Man Without a Face.
He and the Matchstick Men may shoot up the place.

Or go Dirty Dancing I suppose.
I'm a Liar Liar? Who knows?
You can trust me more than Grumpy Old Men.
The Principal doesn't say the same about my pen.

That is why I'm Leaving Las Vegas today.
I mean Flubber is doing so at its bay.
For a Few Dollars More,
And some Daylight down by the shore.

He will find out Reality Bites.
Especially when The Postman has you in his sights.
So if you are in Striking Distance of him,
Be Gone In 60 Seconds or things could get grim.

You could hire The Dream Team.
That would make Big Stan steam.
Or just go Commando one day,
That would even scare the Ghostbusters away.

It may be liked by The Man On The Moon.
But he won't be able to see it at High Noon.
So tune into another Frequency for the poor guy.
Air Force One will help you, no lie.

Unless Coyote Ugly is your fate.
Then you may need a Clean Slate.
That can be given by the Men in Black.
Unless Happy Gilmore decides to attack.

He may throw some Space Balls.
Defintely, Maybe a possibility at your halls.
But you can Lean On Me.
Aren't I Big at my sea?

It beats bringing Armageddon to you.
Do I have to say it Seven times at my zoo?
Maybe the Gremlins will help out.
If Mars Attacks and you shout.

At least no cliffhangar will come due.
If so, the Princess Bride will kill you.
Unless Ernest Goes To Jail.
Then The New Kids will give you bail.

But Fools Rush In.
Iron Man commmitts that sin.
Goodfellas like that.
Flushed Away they make you like a rat.

So Good Luck Chuck.
You and your Role Models are out of luck.
Sorry for the Critical Condition today.
Don't Die Hard at your bay.

The Silver Streak will be along soon.
Taking you to Silverado by noon.
Or maybe Tombstone.
Either way, Clerks will moan.

America's Sweethearts may like it though.
The Dark Knight is sure to show.
Fanboys everywhere will jump up and down.
It will be a Chicken Run across town.

Flawless in every way.
Until Godzilla comes to play.
Are you Losing It yet?
Gung Ho for the pet?

Sorry, Can't Buy Me Love.
It's Goin' South like a dove.
Your brain has Shattered?
Rambo is flattered.

I am a Man on Fire.
Unforgiven for something so dire.
Pat is Zapped for that one.
Time To Kill a Mocking Bird because I'm done.

Yes, as many know I could go on forever. But then you might try and pull the lever, if at Silverado and see the hangman's noose. I wouldn't want that and neither would a moose. So I will let this movie post come to pass from my ever so entertaining little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Monday, November 4, 2013

Whoopdi Friggin Doo Goes For Another Clue!

Robbie Raisin, here today and something is off in blogland I say. So Whoopdi Friggin Doo is on the case, which is, Who Stole Captain Caption's Shoe Lace? The evil tyrant will have to pay. We accept all forms of cash at our bay.

Who would steal such a super heroes shoe laces? With captions he is off to the races. Now he has to wear slippers, I think. They may be women's shoes, but at least they aren't pink. Now on with the case. I will find the thief with grace.

Brian, where were you that night? Did you take them when they caught your gawking sight?

think its seedy, the overlords of retail are greedy. that was funny my eggs are no longer runny.

Hmm okay, you don't like to pay and no longer have runny eggs. You probably stole kegs. Truedessa, you did it didn't you? Admit you needed shoe laces at your zoo.

I'd rather sit on the beach and sweat, too hot jump in the water get all wet

Well I guess being at a nude beach counts you out. No shoe laces are needed about.Hank spill! You fit the bill.


Umm number three. Are you sad now because of me? Alex, it was you! I know it to be true.

Heck, I'd go through the gate. One of the best damn shows ever.

Damn ninja wannabe, still obsessed with TV. Manzanita it was you. Did you have some worm killing to do?

To kill off Santa sounds OK to me, Who cares if no presents around the tree

Good grief. You are a murderer and not a thief. Long name Optimistic guy. Come now, don't lie.

Damn we are soooo busted, Like stale bread that has crusted

Eww mold man. You just steal things from the trash can. Betsy, it was you I bet. Needing to feed each pet.

My tongue was only numb and not swollen, silly one.

A tongue fetish, okay. Let's move on I say. Adam tell me the fact that you did the act.

than a air-borne cow pie.

Playing with cows at your bay? Stay there while I slowly back away. Keepin it real, come over here and spin the guilty wheel.

You know what they say about dudes with big feet?

You looking at Captain Caption's feet? Or something else you think is sweet? Theresa spill your guts. You wanted them for your muts.

Nothing is a bigger turnoff for me than a man who is wearing cowboy boots.

You just felt you had to share? Well I don't care. Terry, tell one and all what you did with them at your hall?

run the other way, they are probably full of worms

I guess you get your exercise in, but cut back on the gin. Remembering Grace, get over here and admit to stealing each shoe lace.

Oh man, I am still so bitter about Lost...all that time and energy invested...all those theories...and then to have that awful crappy ending that answered nothing.

I did not say rant. Geez, I think my eyes began to slant. Rosey, come and tell the truth. Don't go blaming some old bitty named Ruth.

If I wiggle my eyebrows will you buy me coffee too? I love Tim Horton's.

Does this look like your blog? Whoopdi Friggin Doo does not give away free things, want a log?  Gloria it was you. You wanted to bake them at your zoo.

I love old cowboys style

Hmmmmm wow. Meow. Brian the cat, what can you say about that?

HA!!! Yippie-Kai-Yay Pat!!!

Another one. Ride away under the setting sun. Francis are you ready to confess? You are my last guess.

Street magicians=Devils in disguise!

Okay, preach it. They give you a fit. Mary, how did you do it! I know you did it bit by bit.

with their horses, boots, and rope

That would be a sight. Can you rope shoes at night? Snowcatcher spill it now. I need this edition to take a bow.

I can't be shocked. Nor mocked

Can't catch snow in the summer. You were mocked, bummer. Dwei give it up already. You took it for your stuffed teddy.

I can't believe they actually made a live-action show of The Tick

I can't believe you can't believe. Now go somewhere and grieve. Waffles I'm at the end of my rope. You are my last hope.

I hope the move is going well and all that!

That was months ago. Are you kinda slow? Robyn rawk away. Spill today!

I like the line about never needing a rubber

No protection for you? Or is it because nothing is had at your zoo? Elsie, you tried to hang yourself with them, right? Then you saw the light?

Did you send R my way? He showed up at my bay yesterday! What the??

Do you have to ask everyone that? Go bother the cat. Al, be a pal and remember who stole them, guy or gal?

Deaf dogs can hear
confuses your rear?
Oh my, oh dear!
You might try using your ear. 

And so we close the case. Al stood there with a funny face. Turns out he never had shoe laces at all. Captain Captain likes women's shoes slippers as he hobbles down the hall. That is it for another edition of Whoopdi Friggin Doo. Blame Al for the length, he never gave me a clue.


Well wasn't that fun. Have to watch what you say under my sun. Can come back to haunt as one can surely taunt. But that you knew. Does Captain Caption really reside in the loo? If so, I think I'll take a pass and not go near him with my little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Sunday, November 3, 2013

A Colorful Day Here At My Bay!

So dVerse is getting all colorful once more at their shore. Color me pink. I think I might sink. Can you tell where this is going to go? If not, you will I just know. Unless you are R then you may not get very far.

So color me impressed,
The redneck comes dressed.
Oh she may turn me black and blue.
Isn't that for another to do?

True colors shining through?
Just maybe at my zoo.
What? You're green with envy you say?
Brian will gawk and make that go away.

You will turn as white as snow.
Yeah, I really mentioned the white stuff, I know.
Don't look into those baby blues,
You may get bad news.

Unless you are the black sheep of the family I guess,
Then you are always out there making a mess.
Can you really have blue blood?
It would stand out in mud.

Do I get brownie points?
Hmm dog noses fly everywhere at human joints.
But they will get caught red handed.
They are dumb and will get stranded.

Hey, every cloud has a silver lining.
So don't sit there and start whining.
Things like that only happen once in a blue moon.
Unless your life is inside a cartoon.

Let's cut through the red tape.
Paint the town red like Superman's cape.
Red sky at night, sailors delight.
Unless red letter day comes to play.

Are you seeing red?
That must be tough on the head.
I hope you are not tickled pink,
That is done in the clink.

Wave your white flag.
I still won't play tag.
Something old, something new, something borrowed, something blue.
Ummm whoopdi friggin doo?

Was that true blue?
I hope it will come due.
Or else could see the devil and the deep blue sea.
That would just be very scary.

Okay, now time for the colors to head south. I was not born with a silver spoon in my mouth. So color up buttercup. Although I will still get colorful in mass. It will just be a more colorful language pass with my little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Saturday, November 2, 2013

A New Task That Makes Pat Look Like He Hit The Flask!

So the cat started watching Pat the other day and it looked like he had been drinking at our bay. He was moving all about and standing there looking like a trout. So the cat just has to make fun as he tries to get bendy under our sun.

He's standing there but he's climbing a mountain.
Not even reading that book that had the golden fountain.
Was that a shameless plug?
Would you rather read of slug the thug?

Next he had his hands to his heart.
I sat and watched and tried not to fart.
I think he could tell I was laughing to.
Cassie thought he had to use the loo.

Especially when he did the chair pose.
Why he didn't just sit on a chair, who knows.
But with his ass in the air,
I do not want to see the forward fold again at my lair.

I ran away rather swift,
When he did the halfway lift.
Next instead of robbing a bank,
He went into what they call plank.

Next was some locust thing,
Making him look constipated at our wing.
Then came the worst of all.
He tried to be a mutt at our hall.

Going into some downward dog.
He clearly has to have brain fog.
Especially with that leg high.
Does he really think it's going to reach the sky?

Next I had to spring back,
As he looked like he was going on the attack.
I figured he knew I'd do it in rhyme,
And thought me making fun would be a crime.

But instead he just stood there looking to lunge.
He never did take such a plunge.
Instead he looked more like a loon,
After he went into some crescent moon.

The next one looked like it hurt rather bad.
Half splits should not be done by a lad.
I don't care if you're a reverse warrior or not.
Chaturanga sounds like some evil plot.

I could not take it anymore.
So I ran across the floor.
And darted under the nearest bed.
Now I have to get those images out of my head.

Yes, Pat went all yoga nut on the cat, he even got that stupid mat. But at least I can tear that up and have some fun. Although the next time I see him doing it I am just going to run. We shall see if he becomes a bendy mass or just continues to scare my little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Friday, November 1, 2013

Stepped Out Of Their Car "Win A PS4 At You Bin" And Into A Bar!

What is it with the bar? I guess it is where nothing is on par. So when people walk in they get made fun of easily at ones bin? There has to be a better place to go about such a race. The cat doesn't mind the easy one. But lets see if other places are just as fun.

Two guys walk into a morgue,
One looks like a borg.
They look at the dead.
Then one finds a little head.

Two dogs walk into a park.
Each of them have to bark.
They solve life's riddle,
If something bugs you, step up to it and piddle.

Two cats go nowhere.
Resting at their lair.
Everything they need,
The humans simply heed.

Two bloggers meet in an alley.
One a city slicker the other from the valley.
Sadly, it does not end well for the city slicker.
But the other blogger takes pictures to show as pop goes his ticker.

Two people walk into Walmart.
They each grab a shopping cart.
One for the front, one for the back.
Today clothes they kinda lack.

We Interrupt This Blog Post To Bring You A Giveaway. Two posts in one today. Take that Rosey and Halloween Nazi. Thought all would like this one at my sea.

playstation 4.1  
It's November and that means it's time for Playstation 4 Giveaway. This event is Hosted by A Little Bit of Everything So make sure to stop over there and say Thanks.   This event is co hosted by these wonderful blogs. A Peek Into My Paradise, Out of the Bags, Chronically Content, It's Rhyme Time, LoveMy2Dogs, Java John Z'sThis will be sent directly to the winner. I will contact winner, and winner has 48 hours to contact back otherwise, I will pick a new winner. I want the winner to have this before Christmas. This can make the perfect Christmas present. Giveaway is open to US/Can.   a Rafflecopter giveaway SharonWrap Yourself Skinny with IT Works BLOG - A Little Bit of Everything Sponsor me to BlogHer 2013

Enter And With A PS4 You Could Have A Fun Time! We Now Return You To You Regularly Scheduled Rhyme.

Two doctors meet at the shore.
They decide to explore.
But it is tough to come to pass,
As neither can't get the others head out of their ass.

Two kids meet at the loony bin.
They are happy to be let in.
They think it is dandy,
To get so much free candy.

Two women meet on Mars,
Tired of the bars.
But they still get the same view,
With Uranus coming due.

A married couple goes to a flick.
They come across a real dick.
The lass is excited though.
Those toys were overused at her show.

Two politicians meet, who cares.
They just get eaten by bears.
Saving the bear population one at a time.
Politician bear poop art is sublime.

See you don't need a bar or even a car. You can go near or far and things are still on par. The cat had to point that out. Now I'll go meet a trout. And like the bears it will come to pass, eventually, out my little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.