Tuesday, December 24, 2013

Another dVerse Night Before Santa Takes Flight!

It seems at dVerse Santa really gets perverse. He is back once more for another scary encore. Brian and Claudia need to get a guard to chase him from their yard.

It was a clear night,
Santa in mid flight.
He needed a drink,
So gave a quick wink.

Down to dVerse he fell.
Ready to raise some hell.
A twinkle in his eye,
He looked kinda high.

A skip to his walk,
Made many talk.
The fat on his belly,
Rolled like jelly.

He gave Claudia a wink
Demanding a stiff drink.
Things soon went wrong,
They had nothing strong.

Santa knew they did,
So he made a bid.
He would entertain,
Making the booze rain.

He hopped on the bar,
Being the size of a car,
He made it crack,
While swinging his pack.

That sounded wrong.
Just sing a long,
To Santa's beat,
He's got quick feet.

Stripping for all,
At the dVerse hall.
Brian sure gawked,
Wishing the door was locked.

Instead he got this,
Little bit of bliss.
A sight you can't miss,
Made me give a hiss.

Brian caved,
As all raved.
Handed Santa a glass,
Reaching around his ass.

He sucked it back,
With a clackity clack.
Gave one more cheer,
Bearing his rear.

His pants went zip,
Back to his trip.
Naughty or nice,
We all paid the price.

Remind me to avoid dVerse from now on when the holidays dawn. Santa always gets dirty there. Claudia did not seem to care. I guess she liked the thrill. Brian looked kind of ill. Hard not to with that mass. Merry Christmas eve from my little rhyming ass.

Enjoy your winter, smash a printer.

78 comments:

  1. Replies
    1. A straight #14 it is
      Great Christmas Eve

      Hank

      Delete
    2. Hank!
      It's only fair -
      first place we share.

      Delete
    3. Joint first in hand
      Congrats Ma'am!

      Hank

      Delete
    4. It is the season
      To share without reason

      Delete
  2. Merry Christmas, Cat/Pat at your ring!
    And remember to drink! :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hope yours is grand
      There at your land

      Delete
  3. I don't know who Claudia is, but when I get fat, I will make it a point to not hop on the bar.

    Happy Xmas, Pat.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. haha don't get fat
      Not a good thing to be at your mat

      Delete
  4. Merry Christmas to you
    Don't trip on your shoe
    Be nice to Santa today
    For he's riding his sleigh
    At your house may he stop
    For it's just a shirt hop
    To bring you much joy
    For a cat and his boy!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I'll watch the shoe
      That could turn me blue
      Can't have that
      As we wait for santa at our mat

      Delete
  5. Everyone is on a roll, it's Christmas Eve
    Festivities already started,see what gives
    Merry Christmas
    And all the Best
    Safe driving and not too much if you please

    Hank

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Not a drop here
      Sp safe for my rhyming rear
      And all are on a roll
      As the holidays take their toll

      Delete
  6. A stripping Santa... I'm scarred for life!
    Like the new header, Pat.
    You and the cats have a wonderful Christmas at your mat.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. haha bah you'll get over it
      Wait until the easter bunny becomes a stripping hit
      Have a great one too
      At your zoo

      Delete
  7. Some visions of Santa should never be considered. ;) Merry Christmas to you!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yeah some are just scary as can be
      But all the more fun to use at my sea

      Delete
  8. hahahaha...what the heck just happened...lol
    oh my, i might go blind by the look of that behind
    merry christmas my friend
    from the tail to the chin.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. lol your gawk got quite the shock
      As santa did some jingle bell rock

      Delete
  9. So here is a lesson take care
    When strip'n Santa visits your lair
    Shuck the milk and the cookies
    It's meant only for rookies
    Leave the booze for a snooze by a chair

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Keep him from stripping about
      If he is good and passed out

      Delete
  10. Well that was quite the trip
    a drunk santa who likes to strip
    sounds like he did it with flair
    unwrapping his package with care

    Cat you are amusing as you take
    us here and there...

    Merry Christmas Pat and his cats
    hope Santa is good to you at your mat..




    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. haha oh where that can go
      I don't even want to know
      Santa can unwrap his package elsewhere
      I may go blind at my lair lol
      ope you have a great day
      At your bay

      Delete
  11. Quite an adventure Santa had at your bay!
    Hope he is recuperated by Christmas Day.
    Merry Christmas, Pat & Cat!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Let's hope so
      Or no presents will show

      Delete
  12. I'll pass on the stripping Santa but I'll take a drink! Merry Christmas, Pat!! Screw you, cat!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You would scare any santa away
      With that old one eye on display
      So you'd never see it anyway
      Have a merry christmas day

      Delete
  13. Wishing you a Very Merry Christmas Pat. Hope Santa has all his fun before he gets to my place.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yeah I agree
      He has that kind of fun here and we'll flee

      Delete
  14. Rosie red cheeks everywhere! Merry Christmas Pat!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. They may be pale
      Either way a fail haha

      Delete
  15. Blind I may go if a stripping Santa were to show

    ReplyDelete
  16. That's one scary Santa! Merry Christmas, Pat!

    ReplyDelete
  17. Sure it was not someone who escaped the asylum

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Could have been I suppose
      There was no straight jacket with his pose

      Delete
  18. I'll never picture Santa the same again.

    Have a great Christmas, Patt!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. haha yeah oh so scary
      He is all hairy

      Delete
  19. That's totally twisted!

    Merry Christmas, Pat!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Twisted indeed
      Have a great christmas at your feed

      Delete
  20. You just HAD to brighten my day with thoughts of Stripper Fat Santa...thanks!!
    :)

    ReplyDelete
  21. That Santa - he's gotta get high
    In more ways than one.
    But now we know why
    For 24 hours, he is loads of fun.
    ...Then he sleeps for a year and we forget his bum.

    xoRobyn

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yeah that is the truth
      He gets drunk at his booth

      Delete
  22. A Santa who drinks
    well that really stinks
    a hot toddy to share
    with him in underwear.

    Have a good one Cat. I'll pop by tomorrow for your festive Christmas post.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Will be here
      With my festive rear
      Always a post
      Even a scary santa at my coast

      Delete
  23. Replies
    1. The eve is almost through
      here at my zoo

      Delete
  24. Too funny! A stripping Santa and not even for candy! Well liquor is sweet, so yes a treat!

    Merry Christmas, Pat - a very rhyming cat!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. haha yeah he goes for the liquor
      As those twinkly eyes flicker

      Delete
  25. Errr ummm.. Merry Christmas Pat--and remember Santa won't arrive at your house until you fall asleep.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. haha I'll have to go to sleep
      So I can catch the fat guy at my keep

      Delete
  26. Merry Christmas Eve to you, Patt! I hope your Christmas is fabulous!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Sure it will be grand
      Hope the same for your land

      Delete
  27. A Santa with a little holiday cheer
    would be hard to fit down the chimney
    don't you fear?

    Merry Christmas to you and yours!

    betty

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. haha yeah might get stuck
      Then he'd be crap outta luck

      Delete
  28. Here I am to keep my streak alive!
    Saying Merry Christmas at your hive.
    Or Nanny's hive, it probably is
    where all the cats and one dog live.
    haha.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Have to keep that streak going
      A good 1000 in a row soon has to be showing
      And at nanny's hive indeed
      But there are 2 dogs at this feed

      Delete
  29. Merry Christmas to you and all at your den and happy place,
    We'll leave a drink for Santa and not cookies on the fireplace.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. haha that will sure get him in the spirit
      Although if he strips you may fear it

      Delete
  30. Merry Christmas to all

    at your hall

    ReplyDelete
  31. I hope Mrs. Claus gave him an ass whooping he won't forget when he got home for those shenanigans!

    ReplyDelete
  32. What a shame
    Being so late to the game
    Didn't get a chance to wish
    You a wonderful Christmas dish
    And all the rest that goes along
    With a merry, happy song
    So belated I wish you all that and more
    I hope the new year has more rhymes in store

    ReplyDelete