Thursday, February 28, 2013

25% Extra Under My Tent!

 Have to wait and see who this could be!

So the cat has to make up for that extra 25% that gets lost along the way and he will do a little extra today at his bay. You know you should too. So then when the next leap year comes due, you simply have to do 25% the whole day. So you have 75% of it to do nothing at your bay. Might get boring I suppose. You could always work on your superhero pose?

What to do with 25%?
I guess I can vent.
How are you today?
Fine...now go away.

50km/h is all you can go,
Now it's 75km/h at my show.
I know I may suffer RCMP wrath,
But I like my math.

Work a full day,
And make 25% more at your work bay.
Not sure they would agree.
But if not I'll send them a flea.

Go for a walk,
But don't talk.
Just go 25 more steps than before.
Don't run in your door.

It can be a perk,
But for some things it would not work.
Such as the above,
The door would not feel any love.

For opening it 25% more,
Would knock it to the floor.
Those poor hinges would cry,
You just made your door die.

But some air conditioning came due,
Although now everyone can see you.
Maybe even 25% more.
Hmm what sights could be in store.

Or say today you buy a car,
And you want to be on par.
They give you 25% of another one.
I guess parts do go for a ton.

And since you took those extra steps today,
You can eat 25% more at your bay.
Meaning your grocery bill will be more,
The next time you hit the grocery store.

This 25% thing can backfire,
It could make things dire.
But if you want to be a 25% crier,
You have to dive into such a deep fryer.

Now was that not fun? Think of what could be done, if you were to get 25% more at your shore. Think of what you might not want to be done too. Some things could make you blue but others may not. Damn, you must be now suffering from brain rot. So 25% more rat burger and bass to all of you from my little rhyming ass.

Enjoy your winter, smash a printer.

Wednesday, February 27, 2013

What Was That Annoys The Cat!

 Have to wait and see who this could be!

The cat is on a roll as he takes the rhymes for a stroll. But then stupid Pat bothers me and oops the idea decides to flee. Doesn't that suck? When you are just strat out of luck? With a simple what was that your idea can go adios and leave you flat.

That fell over,
Thanks to rover.
There goes your plan,
Some best friend of man.

A car horn honks away,
Making you a gawker at your bay.
Only a road raged nut,
Oops, your idea is as dead as King Tut.

Wake up with one,
Will remember such a run.
Damn, fell back asleep.
The idea is lost in the deep.

Gasp, best idea ever.
You are so clever.
Whoops, maybe not.
Guess it wasn't too hot.

Shouldn't have answered the phone,
Listened to the walls groan.
Hint, it's not really the wall.
Follow the bouncy ball(s).

Thinking of your gut,
Also leaves you in a rut.
Of getting ever so large,
While your idea drifts away on a barge.

At least you took out the trash,
Watched an episode of Mash,
And rested your pretty little head.
Sadly, the idea is still dead.

But don't jump in a lake.
An idea is easy to fake.
Just remember the rhyme,
And you can at least top a rotten mime.

For oh I remember now,
Could lead you to "How to milk a cow."
That is something all want to know,
So let the writing flow.

First you do this,
Make sure not to cause it bliss.
Watch for the feet.
Attack of the killer meat.

See wasn't that easy?
Now how to eat a freezie.
Damn, an idea from no idea at all.
Don't say I'm not helpful at my hall.

See when the idea goes flat just do like the cat. Rant about the idea going flat and then go eat a nice juicy rat. Or at least the first part if you can't take the second to heart. All the more for me and oh an idea is always had at my sea. But when you are so far ahead using them all just causes you dread. Looking at 90 posts waiting to show maybe I should go chase down a crow? Or go and catch another bass. Bah I will just be the same old little rhyming ass.

Enjoy your winter, smash a printer.

Tuesday, February 26, 2013

A dVerse Board Strikes A Cord!

 Have to wait and see who this could be!

So this week the cat wanted to get really dVerse and decided to go visit a place where they surely curse. Also there is a lot of useless crap. But it will make a fun lap. Let's see what these oh so wise people had to say, as the cat looked over their bay.

"I want to eat yogurt and blue m&m's from someone's foot"
I sure hope at least it is cleaned and not fill of soot.
"Lonesome glory"
That sounds like some story.

"Echos in eternity"
Are you sure on your paternity?
"I'm a sleepingwalking brick"
It sure beats being a dick.

"I enjoy hippos"
And now the world knows.
"A goat on a box"
Is it in a time out for chewing your socks?

"im 0k with this."
Some grammar nazi's may hiss.
"You just lost The Game"
Sounds oh so fun but what's with the name?

"I.Need.Summer...NOW"
To that I also give a meow.
"I want $250,000"
I also agree with such hollers.

"Fruit cups don't taste good"
Go all gutter on that I could.
"Television wastes my life away."
Also increases your rumps display.

"I love pizza, nachos and beer."
Yep, your rump will be something to fear.
"I fell and hit my head today"
Clearly it shows with your display.

"pop the pills. pills to pop. pop-a-pop-a-pop."
If it is a blue pill up things could crop.
"Ostriches saved my life"
Wow, you must have been in some dire strife.

"Go ahead and sign up"
Will you put money in my cup?
"Explain why for my two cents."
It was not me, I'd never make car dents.

"It will take a couple days"
To raise my IQ back after reading these displays.
"I'm whispering, can you hear me"
Thankfully computers don't speak at my sea.

And that is all the cat could take as such dumbness I can only hope is fake. Almost makes those search engine nuts that find me seem a bit less scary. Then again maybe not, as there are a whole friggin lot. Oh and these were taken from a random message board pass. It popped up and I could not resist giving it a go with my little rhyming ass.

Enjoy your winter, smash a printer.

Monday, February 25, 2013

The Real Deal Of The Reel!

 Have to wait and see who this could be!

So you got stupid Cameron all egocentric and such. Blabbing on about being top dog at the box office way too much. The cat just has to say how full of strat he is with such crap. For all seem to be a sap and forget inflation at their sea. Of course you can win at the box office when it costs three times more to see a movie. So let's show the real deal of the top 50 and of course it will be nifty. It goes in order too from the first one you view.

Gone with the Wind I may be.
It beats being stuck in Star Wars with a wookie.
The Sound of Music is in my head.
E.T.: The Extra-Terrestrial's finger can cause dread.

The Titantic is sadly number five.
The Ten Commandments help all survive.
I like to flap my Jaws.
Doctor Zhivago curls my claws.

The Exoricist isn't very scary.
But Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs may have a hairy.
As 101 Dalmations sniff their butt.
The Empire Strikes Back at Jabba the Hutt.

Ben-Hur likes to purr.
Avatar is fourteen making it a blur.
Return of the Jedi will get your ewok on.
While Star Wars Episode 1 I wish was long gone.

The Sting might just hurt.
The Lion King deserves a Hakuna Matata insert.
Raiders of the Lost Ark,
Steered clear of Jurassic Park.

The Graduate likes a mommy.
Fantasia lets you and Mickey get chummy.
The Godfather gives quite the bed head.
Forrest Gump might run until he's dead.

Mary Poppins will cure all.
A spoon full of sugar would make Grease have a ball.
The Avengers will, well, avenge.
Thunderball will have its revenge.

Then comes a The Dark Knight.
Him in The Jungle Book would be a sight.
Might turn out to be a Sleeping Beauty though.
Until Shrek 2 decided to show.

Ghostbusters makes you feel good?
Butch Cassidy and The Sundance Kid got stuck with some wood.
Actually stuck with more than a Love Story.
Even Spiderman would find that gory.

Independance Day brings the probe.
Or leaves you Home Alone stuck in a snow globe.
Pinocchio could not tell a lie.
Cleopatra sure gave it a try.

Beverly Hills Cop gave bananas a run.
Goldfinger thought that was fun.
Stuck in an Airport though.
At least gives you an American Graffiti show.

The Robe is oh so shiny.
Pirates of the Caribean: Dead Man's Chest is far from tiny.
It goes Around The World in 80 Days.
Bambi wanted to try and get some sunny rays.

Blazing Saddles will hurt your ass.
Batman thought that was rather crass.
The Bells of St. Mary's tuned it out.
The Lord of the Rings: Return of the King knows what that is all about.

Finding Nemo means lunch for me.
The Towering Inferno I will push into the sea.
Spiderman 2 swings into view.
My Fair Lady has a crush on him too.

The Greatest Show on Earth,
Was when National Lampoon's Animal House gave birth.
But the Passion of the Christ.
Couldn't even stop Star Wars Episode 3 Revenge of the Sith's childhood heist.

Back to the Future going 88 mph is some serious shit.
The Lord of The Rings: The Two Towers had quite the pit.
I also have The Sixth Sense.
The Dark Knight Rises was worth a few cents.

See what a Superman I can be?
Meant cat, but it beats being called Tootsie.
Smokey and the Bandit might run you down,
In some West Side Story town.

Harry Potter and the Sorcer's Stone,
Made Lady and the Tramp groan.
Close Encounters of a Third Kind,
Had even Lawerence of Arabia protecting his behind.

The Rocky Horror Picture Show,
Had quite a Rocky flow.
The Best Years of Our Lives,
Weren't when The Poseidon Adventure gave you hives.

The Lord of The Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring,
Is quite the word Twister to sing.
But the Men in Black,
Will cross The Bridge on the River Kwai to attack.

For those Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen.
It's a Mad, Mad, Mad, Mad World with a mad callin.
Swiss Family Robinson knew such a fact.
One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest as they got in on the act.

M.A.S.H is where they had to go.
Beats getting stuck with Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom don't you know.
Star Wars Episode 2: Attack of the Clones,
Even gave Mrs. Doubtfire the groans.

Aladdin on the other hand.
Was too busy dropping a Toy Story 3 grand.
He was afraid of that Ghost.
The Duel in the Sun made him roast.

The Hunger Games sound tasty.
Pirates of the Caribbean: The Curse of the Black Pearl leaves you pasty.
But a House of Wax,
Makes you look out your Rear Window unable to relax.

The Lost World: Jurassic Park,
Indiana Jones and The Last Crusade avoided that mark.
Spiderman 3 came on back.
And Terminator 2: Judgement Day killed it for its abysmal flack.

What? You counted away at my hut? I sorta, maybe did double it up. Hopefully you had some extra coffee in your cup. For the top 100 did show. Proving Cameron is well down below. I just could not stop myself but I did so before I hit 200 at my shelf. You did not even have to pay for a pass for such sights from my little rhyming ass.

Enjoy your winter, smash a printer.

Sunday, February 24, 2013

Another Year's Tour As The Cat Turns Four!

So today the cat gets a nice big steak all to himself. I will grab it and run off with it to some high shelf. Then chow down and save some for later so my stomach does not frown. Nothing worse than a hairball and spraying it all over the wall. But now, if going by mutt years, I'm in my twenties or so, which means some wise words should flow.












There we go, now such wise words out of me will flow. I will make you humans so wise from now on that before long you too will be burying things in the lawn. At least the geriatic years have yet to come. Then we may get to what color each day the stuff is that comes from my bum. But there will be a long while before that comes to pass and many more wise words will come from my, another year older, little rhyming ass.

Enjoy your winter, smash a printer.

Saturday, February 23, 2013

Random Time. Is There Any Other Chime?

 Have to wait and see who this could be!

The cat knows he is always random here and likes to keep all on their toes with his little rhyming rear. But today things pop in his head that don't go together until I make it so and cause your mind dread. It is fun to confuse and so I will light the fuse.

If it is warm and sunny,
You can go outside and your nose isn't runny,
Shouldn't winter be done?
Instead of going into March twenty one.

For a time save,
You use the microwave.
So you micro a wave?
Poor wave in a grave.

I will pay you CASH in hand.
Shouts someone across the land.
What else are they going to use?
Swipe their debit card on your arm and abuse?

On a budget at ones work den.
Can't afford a pen.
But oh yes to that big new $1000 chair.
It just has such flair.

If you open your store,
But forget to unlock the door.
Is that false advertising of some sort?
Better watch it, might get taken to court.

What is up with the lemon?
Did it originate in Yemen?
For if you are out to lunch,
You are the lemon of the bunch.

If a judge is bought,
With a huge money lot,
Doesn't he become a peace broker?
Of course John Smith did not choke her.

Shouldn't it be the people not of Walmart?
Because 96% of the US lives near such a cart.
Only 20 miles away.
That may take the value down of your bay.

Want to go to Alaska and yet not?
Then take a hiking trot.
Visit the Unalaska city.
So you are Unalaska in Alaska, what a pity,

If the average person watched 900,000 hours of TV in their life.
Couldn't reality TV that causes the cat strife,
Be ones own room?
No wonder obesity brings so many doom.

Now wasn't that a random day? Have anything to say? Of course you do. Maybe today Brian will get first at my zoo. I bet it will be Hank. Of course Waffles could make him walk the plank. There was some more random sass from my always random little rhyming ass.

Enjoy your winter, smash a printer.

Friday, February 22, 2013

Today That Voice In Your Head Will Cause You Dread!

 Have to wait and see who this could be!

So today the cat is going to get you all going at your bay. For you will have much in your head by the time this is through. But it was oh so fun to come due. Even if some got stuck in my head as well, causing me quite the amount of hell.

The wheels on the bus
Go round and round, round and round.
Out don't cuss,
There is plenty more to be found.

Everybody sing this song,
Doo dah, doo dah
Never ending is wrong,
It's in your head, bah.

Who let the dogs out,
Who, who.
Some butt sniffing about,
By you you.

We all live in a yellow submarine,
A yellow submarine, a yellow submarine.
Cheating as I bellow at my scene.
Bellow at my scene, bellow at my scene.

It's a small world after all,
It's a small world after all, it's a small small world.
Which I rule at my hall,
Has your brain swirled?

I believe I can fly,
Spread my wings and touch the sky.
But I won't give it a try,
Because I may die.

The itsy bitsy spider went up the water spout,
Down came the rain and washed the spider out.
I guess he just had no clout,
That must have made him pout.

When you wish upon a star,
Makes no difference who you are,
You still sing that crap far,
Your mind stuck in such tar.

I've got a lovey bunch of coconuts,
There they are all standing in a row.
Appeasing to some locomutts,
Who like dressing up in a bow.

And now we are done,
With our annoying song run.
I hope you had fun.
Enjoy repeating them a ton.

Now can you speak without a tune in your head? One that causes some serious dread. You may have it in your head all day. But sing it out across the bay. You may as well make others suffer too, unless they plug their ears at the singing of you. Then a different suffering will come to pass and that is enjoyable too, to my little rhyming ass.

Enjoy your winter, smash a printer.

Thursday, February 21, 2013

Let's Take A Peek At The Greek!

 Have to wait and see who this could be!

First if you get a chance give this new blog a glance. The cat has sent him around to many of you, as he asked me for many tips at my zoo. I guess I can add that to the resume at my show. Helping new bloggers while chewing Pat's toe.

The cat has always liked the Greek gods and such. Although Drazin is a bit out of touch, thinking he is one with his third person yap and bald head under the sun. But at least he did not claim stuff like the ones below, out of the weirdest things they seem to grow.

Aphrodite was oh so grand,
She was the most beautiful in the land.
But guess how she came to be?
She grew from the sea.

Uranus got his genitals chopped off,
Which must have made him scoff,
And they landed in the sea,
With foam forming around the thing no longer attached to thee.

Poof! Aphrodite was born.
So to be beautiful, have a males genitals be torn.
Wonder what happened to the cat's?
That is what those vet's do, those rats.

Athena is another story,
And far more gory.
Zeus did the humpty hump with Metis,
And then ate her and her fetis.

For some prophecy said,
The baby would bring him dread.
And what happened instead?
The baby keeping growing and Hephaestus had to crack open Zeus's head.

Poof! It's a girl.
Makes my toes curl.
I guess Junior ripped Zeus off.
Sure he won't drown them in a horse trough.

Seems Zeus really likes to give birth,
After he diddled around on earth.
For he humpty humped another one,
And Hera did not think that was fun.

So she tricked the women into asking Zeus,
To show her his divine godly caboose.
So he let his divinity loose,
And she cooked like a goose.

Zeus snatched the baby and sewed it in his hip.
A few months later Dionysus took his birth trip.
So out of a thigh,
Came such a godly guy.

Damn! Oh so strange,
Those gods were truly out on the range.
So far out in left field they'll never return,
Coming out of ones hip truly must burn.

And now that the cat has made you all sick. I will end it before Zeus turns another trick. Or maybe tries to strike me down. I guess Drazin isn't from such a crazy town. Just look at those gods, I've seen more brains cells in cods. Of course after seeing them come to pass, those cods were eaten by my little rhyming ass.

Enjoy your winter, smash a printer.

Wednesday, February 20, 2013

When It's Cold You Humans Are Told!

Have to wait and see who this could be!

The cat was trying to sleep the other night and stupid Pat would not stay just right. He had to roll here and there and just curl up my neck hair. So I swatted him good and he soon understood. He did more so when I bit his arm around the elbow.

Pick a spot and stay,
That is how you lay.
For the entire night,
Until I see the sunlight.

If I want to sleep,
Ever so deep,
On your ass,
You take a pass.

If I want all of the bed,
You move your damn head.
You play like you're dead.
No matter how much I cause you dread.

If I want the pillow.
Go grab a pussy willow.
See the cat is nice,
Giving you a feline slice.

Or at least there is the name,
That brings some fame.
Just don't let things rise.
I may pounce should that arise.

If you can't tell from my look,
That I think you're a crook.
For stealing my sleep,
You flip flopping creep.

Then your leg will fry,
I'll poke you in the eye.
I'll steal the covers too.
And stick to you like glue.

It is cold,
So I am sold.
Even if you stink,
I'll curl up at our rink.

Then you stay still.
Or I'll give you a thrill.
The bed is mine,
All belongs to the feline.

You just rent your little spot.
I don't care if I make you hot.
Just stay in one place,
Don't make a funny face.

Don't grunt or move at all.
Don't go running down the hall.
Hold it all night.
And don't take flight.

I am the master of the room.
You are just the broom.
I'll lay like I'm in bloom.
You just stay still or I'll cause you doom.

All you humans take such advice or you'll be the ones chowing down on mice. When the cat wants the bed whether it's at your feet or at your head. Just stay still and you will suffer no ill will. If you move though I can't be responsible for what happens at your show. So just let the night pass and maybe you won't, but I'll be a happy little rhyming ass.

Enjoy your winter, smash a printer.

Tuesday, February 19, 2013

A dVerse Bark In The Dark!

 Have to wait and see who this could be!

I peered into the dark,
For something left its mark.
Pat was asleep,
But this could not keep.

I dashed to the bed,
Smacking him in the head.
I clawed at the sheet,
Going under for heat.

It was for heat,
I was not beat.
Don't even think that,
I just wanted to protect Pat.

So there we were,
I with my fur,
And Pat groaning at me,
He was a tad grumpy.

But I went down deeper,
For this thing sounded like a keeper.
It wailed and it popped.
I bet it even hopped.

Maybe that evil Nugget had found me.
But he already has cats by the plenty.
It could be a thief,
Ready to cause me grief.

They would steal my food.
That would just be rude.
Maybe Santa is late,
Or very early at any rate.

Drazin could be here,
But him you would hear before he got near.
It had to be a ghost,
From some far off coast.

That is when Pat heard it too.
I swear the thing could moo.
He looked over for Cassie,
Spotting the sleeping lassie.

How could this be?
Why would she not flee?
Then it came once more,
A popping at our shore.

Or it was a spurt.
I put Pat on high alert.
I told him to get a bat.
It could be a big rat.

But he just got up and walked away,
Leaving me alone at our bay.
What if it got him first?
That's when I heard a familiar burst.

He yelled my name.
I was not to blame.
I just chewed the tp,
And some funny looking handle at our sea.

Come to think of it,
It did turn a bit.
I then did a flip,
As my head felt a drip.

Sadly it seems the scary beast,
Was because I tried to have a handle feast.
I turned the shower on just enough,
To make it sound like someone was going to get rough.

Note to self,
Chew the corner of a shelf.
Leave those handles be,
No matter how juicy.

Now wasn't that dVerse? That monster made me curse. I mean shower handle. Next time Pat should light a candle. Some scary thing could lurk. I did leave him with a smirk. Something new I can do at our grass. I can turn the shower on with my little rhyming ass.

Enjoy your winter, smash a printer.

Monday, February 18, 2013

Become A Fan Of Zombie Man!

Never fear, no zombie feet are near. This is the newest superhero on the block who is going to clean each bad guys clock. For today is the unveiling of the super undead. Yes, that is what I said. Today is the day that a zombie becomes a super hero at my bay.

He was down and out,
Wondering why all people did was shout.
Then came that faithful day,
When he made his first save in some way.

With his suit,
He still staggered like a brute.
Yes, he still had a smell,
But people no longer gave a yell.

They found him grand.
They cheered him across the land.
So he lapped it up,
Like an attention seeking pup.

Then came the crooks,
Who laughed at his looks.
But little did they know,
The power he had to strike a blow.

For with his dead but loving heart,
He beat them into submission with a body part.
Then it just clicks back on.
That is what happens when the super undead visits your lawn.

Now without further adieu,
Zombie Man for all to view.




Click Here To Peer!

Doesn't he look grand? I'm sure he'll be a great addition to superhero land. Between him and that Tarsier Man nut, I could get invaded at my hut. So go give a look and watch him stop a crook. A word to the wise as well, may be more for older kiddies as he is a demon of hell. So there we go class, a superhero zombie from my little rhyming ass.

Enjoy your winter, smash a printer.

Sunday, February 17, 2013

Don't Trip Over Your Lip!

So dVerse wants the cat to take a trip down memory lane or somewhere where you could go by train. Maybe out stuck in the rain or in a plane? Too bad the cat doesn't go anywhere, except that other lair. But we won't go there as I had to have a bath last time after I rolled in something rare. But then the cat is transported about at each place, so lets see if that I can't embrace.

Blogland pages, Blogland pages
Bringing people out of their cages.
There some sort of spark rages
Failing to extinguish on the Blogland pages.
You'll find much in the Blogland pages.

Neighborhood watch. A camel toe crotch.
Figures that represent a certain one eye.
A Paleo lass. A bite to the ass.
Sunset pictures with a clear blue sky.

A giant cat tower. A body waxing shower.
A 67 year old sporting pink hair.
Cheater spotting. Some grocery trotting.
Pictures that can't help but give you a scare.

Blogland pages, Blogland pages
Bringing people out of their cages.
There some sort of spark rages
Failing to extinguish on the Blogland pages.
You'll find many friends in the Blogland pages.

Brighter moods. Eve's attitude.
Wading the waves of a crystal beach.
Fact of the day. Happy Harry's display.
With a sunrise and smoke not out of reach.

On Blogland Pages, Blogland pages
The wacky and weird come in stages.
A shrink might lock many in cages
Should they really look at the Blogland pages.

Caturday Cat Naps. Belly button laps.
Fresher Friday vacuum brush dances.
Lighting a house. Standing up close.
Stood with a prayer to good old St. Francis.

Blogland pages, Blogland pages
Bringing people out of their cages.
Here much information rages
Unknown by many but those on Blogland pages.
You can learn much from the Blogland pages.

Catholic Popes. Answers for dopes.
Paths crossing the sky like a dove.
Lord Ray's Loo. A contest or two.
And best of all there is no need to shove.

Blogland pages, Blogland pages
Bringing people out of their cages.
Here much information rages
Unknown by many but those on Blogland pages.
You can learn much from the Blogland pages.

There we go, past and present collide at my show, as I think about where I have visited along the way and what saw the light of day. Some a bit scary others too hairy but with each pass more fun is had by my little rhyming ass.

Enjoy your winter, smash a printer.

Saturday, February 16, 2013

Time To Give Stick A Little Flick!

  Have to wait and see who this could be!

Could the cat be telling you to stick it? Could the cat want to beat you with a stick a bit? All thoughts the go through ones mind especially when dealing with my little rhyming behind. But the cat is too slick to just hit you with a stick. Instead I use my pringle cans for that and so just stick with it at my mat.

Stick it here, stick it there.
With the stick beware.
For those that aren't picky.
Things could get rather sticky.

Now we will linger,
Up and around the finger.
Don't stick it in a plug,
Don't stick it to a thug.

Don't stick it in a pile,
Of something that smells vile.
Don't stick it a door,
And slam it at your shore.

Don't stick it in the VCR,
If you still have one at your bar.
Don't stick it in the blender,
Or the other thing that could change your gender.

All common sense,
But it seems some are dense.
So don't get tense,
It's time for the head to hop the fence.

Don't stick it between rails.
Don't stick it under cow tails.
Don't stick it under a tire,
Don't stick it in a fire.

Don't stick it on a table saw.
Don't stick it near my claw.
Don't stick it in the stove.
Don't stick it in a thorn grove.

And speaking of head,
This may cause dread.
But you can't stick it where ever you please.
Unless you want a generous disease.

So stay safe from harm,
This is not to cause alarm.
Don't buy the farm,
Now on to the arm.

Don't stick it in a fan blade.
Don't stick it out to get sprayed by Raid.
Don't stick it in a dumpster.
Don't stick it to a grumpster.

Don't stick it in a hose.
Don't stick it up someones nose.
Don't stick it in front of a bus.
Don't stick it out in the form of a cuss.

Flip arm for leg and finger for toe.
The same thing applies at your show.
Or for any other body part,
That stick it takes to heart.

For if you want to stick it to the man.
Throw him in a garbage can.
Stick a post it to his head.
Don't stick it to end up dead.

The cat just wanted to go all stick it today and so brought forth a stick it display. So stick it to the moon, stick it to a raccoon. Just don't stick it to a goon or a crazy loon. Then they may chop it off or something like that and you may be snip snip like the cat. Now I end my stick it mass and will watch where I stick my little rhyming ass.

Enjoy your winter, smash a printer.

Friday, February 15, 2013

It's Prophecy Day For Many At My Bay!

 Have to wait and see who this could be!

So the cat found a random prophecy generator thing and thought it would be fun to use at my wing. I took the comments from the last post and generated one for all who visited my coast. Of course when this goes to air that would be three months ago at my lair.

Waffles beat Hank that day.
So he is first on display.
"A humble prince will never flinch."
Not even an inch?

Brian beat Hank too.
Must have been an off day at his zoo.
"A relationship ending shall not happen with the regretful player in the age of eternity."
So I guess don't go joining a fraternity?

Hank finally got around,
To being found.
He shall not lead with the aged jaguar in the fall for the sake of fate."
Good thing it is winter so there is no jaguar hate.

Then Betsy came to be,
Rhyming away at my sea.
"The faithful slave will never knit and a discovery will finally happen with the drunken angel in a wheat field."
Hmmm maybe she should look into a big shield?

Old one eye was up,
Giving her this little hiccup.
"She must skirmish near a well."
Lassie won't even save her from such hell.

Brian the cat came due,
Next up at my zoo.
"The smug hangman must not ensure with the curious jaguar during midnight."
I guess you know what do to if you see such a fright.

The Pokey Rock gave a cheer,
This one may cause fear.
"A breakdown will finally occur."
I hope nothing breaks to ruffle your fur.

Next up was Susan Kane,
It seems she might get banished from some lane.
"A banishment must not happen at a meeting place for the sake of redemption."
Think there is some kind of exemption?

Folklore came due,
With her big long keepin' it real spiel at my zoo.
"An announcement will finally take place with the gloomy orphan on a cloudy day."
Awww she's going to save little orphan Annie at her bay.

Da tabbies o trout towne,
Were next to come on down.
"They will finally rust near a holy site on either equinox coming."
Hmm better get licking so no rust comes a humming.

Peaches Ledwidge showed her face,
Giving a cheer for my crazy place.
"The wise hamster must dither."
At least you can do it watching Slither.

Mary came to spy,
With a rhyming cry.
"The diamond warden will finally scare in the summer."
Getting a diamond sure wouldn't be a bummer.

Anne of course had her 0.00001 cents worth added in.
She can never truly win.
"A takeover must happen with the crazy thief on some spring equinox day."
I knew she was so deceitful at her bay.

Adam came with a rhyme,
Thankfully it wasn't about a mime.
"A rebellion will finally occur with the cold-hearted lad."
I hope cold hearts don't catch on as a fad.

Spitty-the-Kitty came to spit,
And to rhyme a bit.
"He shall rush with the lilac hermit."
Just don't drool or spit.

And finally came Oui Oui.
Rhyming up a spell at my sea.
"A thwarted plan shall not happen near a fortress."
Maybe you better court less.

And that was the Saturday comments at my sea. Don't you just love a good prophecy? I hope none of them come true. That would mean many have a loose screw. At least none will come to pass for my little rhyming ass.

Enjoy your winter, smash a printer.

Thursday, February 14, 2013

White As A Dove Give It Some Love!

Before we get to diaper man, Pat was shouted out at this Can. See what I did there? Also an all rhyming interview at this lair!


To the diaper wearing loon,
That makes lovers swoon.
With arrows on his back,
Ready to swoop in and attack.

After all of these years,
You still run corporate gears,
Making a fake holiday,
Overshadowing the groundhog's display.

Sure, you a little fat guy,
That can flap and fly,
Must appeal so much more,
With your tales of lore,

Than a shadow fearing overgrown rat.
But his candy is just as flat.
I suppose yours has more lumps,
It must be a struggle after giving so many humans the humps.

Do you let it sit for years to come,
Like a fine wine or age old rum?
I bet you watch too,
You diaper wearing pervert, you.

Fuzzy bears for God sake,
Make your lover's knees shake.
And in the money the greedy rake,
Oops, tomorrow the love is still fake.

I guess one to many hairs,
Live on your legs in pairs.
It must stop your powerful blast,
For only one day it can last.

Your superficial strike,
The corporations like.
The lawyers do too!
The divorce rate still proves you have no clue.

So let's give a cheer,
To the one with the diaper rash rear.
He is oh so grand,
Spreading love across the land.

Having all show it with ease,
By paying corporate fees.
The board room loves his whammy,
And tomorrow your relationship is just as clammy.

I think the cat would rather take zombie feet then the above picture treat. Blah to that, is all that can be said by the cat. And to people thinking a diaper wearing loon can forever make one swoon, pfft get a grip. Can you tell I hate this day from my rhyme trip? If you want to waste your time and drop a dime just come whiff my magical gas. It comes out daily from my little rhyming ass.

Enjoy your winter, smash a printer.

Wednesday, February 13, 2013

Canada is Out Of Luck Unless You Have An Even Buck!

 Have to wait and see who this could be!

So last week here at our Canadian creek the penny officially became dead. Yep, off with its copper head. Or whatever it is made out of. That cat is too lazy to show that fact some love. That means now if it comes to $1.96 you are in a fix. But that isn't the worst part which I will show at my cart.

Step on our Canadian shore,
Bring your snowshoes to explore.
But forget some sayings you once had.
For they are no longer valid at our pad.

No finding pennies for good luck,
Instead throw salt and make people duck.
In for a penny, in for a pound,
I guess that would be nickel as up you round.

No longer can be called a bad penny,
Because there just isn`t any.
At least nothing can cost you a pretty penny,
So you can buy moose tails, many.

It even helps out poor you,
For no longer will you be blue.
You won`t feel like a penny waiting for change.
Boy, that was lame at my range.

I guess one still will stick,
As here it does the trick.
Now no one will have two pennies to rub together.
Think that will make all the same under any weather?

And you will feel the burn,
As a penny saved is a penny you could earn.
But now there is none,
Ruining your penny saving fun.

Fools will still turn up too,
But won`t be like a bad penny that they come due.
Instead will have to be like a quarter,
Or we just send all the fools across the border.

And this last one bothers me,
As I don`t give away things for free.
I have to eat you know,
So I hate to see this one go.

A penny for your thoughts.
Really hurts me lots.
I have lots of thoughts,
So I could have plenty of penny plots.

But at least we still have the loonie,
And if that isn`t enough the toonie.
Now if we were tiny,
We`d be a bit cartoony.

Just had to give that a go. Overall glad we no longer have to carry those things around at our show. But hmm rounding up or down? I bet down will be were all go to make us frown. Anything to save a buck, right? Which is why pennies are gone to the dead of night. Sorry penny, I don`t mourn your pass but you were fun to hit around the floor by my little rhyming ass.

Enjoy your winter, smash a printer.

Tuesday, February 12, 2013

The Approve dVerse Groove!

 Have to wait and see who this could be!

Lots of spam all around but the cat finds it funny as some come with their same old sound. You still find them in the mailbox too. They sure want you to buy buy buy at your zoo. So they made the cat approve a dVerse groove.

Bad credit? No credit?
That is okay.
There is no edit.
You can have money to play.

Forget that fees.
Forget the rules.
You can buy big trees,
Or gamble like fools.

When others say no.
We find a way.
Just look at that car show.
Listen to what we say.

You could get that car,
You could get that boat.
Whether near or far,
You could buy a goat.

We are the best.
You will find no other.
We beat the rest.
You will never find another.

Forget the jargon we speak.
That is all just fine print.
You can go fish in a creek.
We will take care of such tint.

Why do I smile?
Why do you ask?
We just went the extra mile,
Take a drink from this here flask.

Take that it's free.
That gift is just for you.
Show all you see.
Our logo will make all less blue.

Oh and a card as well.
Here you are.
We never ever sell.
Have fun at the bar.

Look out for the flyer.
That will be out next time.
It will light your fire.
Having two cards is just sublime.

Aren't those flyers and emails grand? I mean they sooo help out at your land. Charging you up the arse in fees. But forget that and buy those trees. That is all they want and then they will taunt. For the interest will come to pass. To that I throw them in the trash and stick up my little rhyming ass.

Enjoy your winter, smash a printer.

Monday, February 11, 2013

Time For Round Ten With The Crazies At My Den!

 Have to wait and see who this could be!

Once more here on the attack to give the search engine weirdos some flack. For there are a ton that come to give a bow, which can be seen since I have done this ten times now. Now I won't make you wait. Let's once more open the crazy search engine term gate.

"best rime ever"
"best rhyme ever"
"best rhymes ever"


The first guy is out of air or looking for something to do while bare. The second only likes one while the other likes all that is spun. Each want the best, I hope the first guy gets an annual disease test.

"viking woman armor"

I guess they want to see the cat chew some fat.

"pile road sign"

Umm err you have piles on your bum? Forget the road sign and get some rum.

"hot dog thong man"

I don't think I even wanna know. But at least either way a hot dog or maybe limp dog will show.

"fun facts about triskaidekaphobia"

You are a nut and all this year you will be in a triskaidekaphobia rut. If you believe in such crap. What a silly sap.

"brave with wet hair when she swims in the river"

Okay, you must have plenty of time in your day. Damn, that was long. Does wet hair make her strong? Or are you looking for a thrill? Go pop a pill.

"paintings of a farting butt"

Umm doesn't your ass have enough gas?

"scary nicolas cage"
"nicolas cage scary"


Either way it is true just look at his great hairdo. What hair? It's not a wig I swear.

"where does the thes"

Why does it its? You are the pits.

"cow nuts"

This one almost won. But another is much better that a nut spun. Imagine what came up? I bet it wasn't a pup.

"french mimer"

Is there even such a thing? They don't talk or sing. So how can they be french or whatever else they wish to be? Either way they are scary.

"fart under blanket rage comic"

At least their air is kept in. That isn't such a sin.

"ass wiggling screensaver"

I hope the ass was fine and not something from the humpty dumpty line.

"chubby man in boxers"

I guess that answered the ass question. I did not need an answer or want such a suggestion.

"man boobs prize"

Are you studying up on the case? Watch some, you may get lost in there without a trace.

"snow boobies"

It is the season I guess to commit snowwoman, or maybe snowman, treason.

And the winner that takes the cake and much more he or she does take. For the protection is at full strength here, you will never get a disease so have no fear. Hitting the market soon and helping you up before noon.

"weiner in armor"

And so ends another round. I wonder if the armor makes a squeeky sound? That could be awful cold. It could also rust or get some mold. I guess care must be taken though. Maybe some instructions will show. Round ten has now come to pass with the crazy mass, that have no class, here to visit my little rhyming ass.

Enjoy your winter, smash a printer

Sunday, February 10, 2013

It's A Gun Run!

The cat has no problem letting go as said at my show. But dVerse brought it up at their shore and I saw the below, deciding to explore. As clearly some letting go needs to happen in such a way that big canons aren`t legal to hang on the wall at any bay. So away we go with a different letting go below.

Gun sales up 20% down below. That means the US show. Is something the cat came across the other day. Wow, you guys like your gun play. I mean why not? You can use them to shoot at a pot.

The economy is down,
But don't frown.
Let's buy a gun.
And make all run.

You get a free apple.
Maybe some snapple.
A free pack of bullets too.
Look what free can do.

But food prices are high.
I suppose you can give hunting a try.
Oops, your poor toe.
Forward is where the barrel should show.

Even a cat knows that.
Oh, it was for a rat.
Yeah, those traps are no good.
Shoot it with a big gun you should.

Might make a tasty treat.
If you pick the lead out of the meat.
But that is a task.
Don't forget your freaky Jason mask.

Oh, you got that for free too?
Wow, oh so special at your zoo.
I bet you want to visit a store.
Become something of lore.

Oops, that Id card you left.
Proves you aren't good at theft.
But oh what fun,
An idiot with a gun.

That isn't all.
You have to get a sniper rifle for your wall.
It just looks so pretty there.
I'm sure all will stop and stare.

I mean compensation is key.
You can stare at it when you pee.
That will make you feel ducky.
Even if you can't get lucky.

Oh my what guns can do.
You should get two.
For you never know,
You may be attacked by a killer, zombie, five eyed, pink crow.

That cat just had to have fun with the gun, which it seems so many need. Too bad Jimbo didn't first learn how to read. Maybe he'd still have that toe and not be high enough to see such a crow. But he helps them sell in mass which is pretty pathetic to my little rhyming ass.

Enjoy your winter, smash a printer.

Saturday, February 9, 2013

The Lame Is Around And Easily Found!

 Have to wait and see who this could be!

So the cat heard you all whining at my hall for such wonderful things to come due. I mean you did not believe those wonders were true? Now a sequel has come due and will be shown off at my zoo. I know it is just so boring to see. But you called for it, so don't blame me.



Look, it's a big pointy rock.
Doesn't that make you want to talk?
The grass can grow too.
A rock with grass, who knew?


Rocks with faces.
Staring off at other places.
Don't you humans already do that?
So now rocks have to also stare like a dingbat?


A great big hole in the ground.
It sure wasn't dug by a hound.
That is impressive I will say.
It's an out of date litterbox on display.


And we have a great big wall.
My, it is tall.
Who ever would have thought of building a wall?
My, it is tall.


A building that can't stand up straight.
You humans and your screwed up fate.
Next a wiggling building will come due.
That will prove you have no clue.


Another rock face with no nose?
God only knows.
Why you humans have a thing for rocks.
Maybe they take your lost socks?


A woman in a toga thing.
Who can't even have a fling.
Just standing there forever more.
What a bore.


A round building with no glass.
How is that going to keep out the bug mass?
Tons of windows and no glass.
Must have been built by a singing wall bass.



A building with tons of doors.
And lots of white floors.
First you have to choose,
Then clean a ton, how can you lose?


And finally water going down a hill.
That really has to thrill
Almost as fun as a trip to the vet.
Oops, poor you got wet.

Now are you even still awake? Go hop in a cold lake. That will wake most of you up. Certain parts may suffer a hiccup. But at least it won't be such a bore. Like it was watching those oh so lame things at my shore. So the lame wonders have to come pass. Another reason sequels can annoy my little rhyming ass.

Enjoy your winter, smash a printer.

Friday, February 8, 2013

Board The Train Of Big Head, Small Brain!

Have to wait and see who this could be!

So a few days back the cat noticed a so called article of a cat study at my shack. Then yesterday thanks to a certain bay, maybe the guy in the above pic? I'm still not telling about that little trick. Anyway, back on task. What was this so called study you ask? The Smithsonian Conversation Biology Institute, let's call them stick up their ass humans or maybe instead of stick, flute, went on about a "funded" study that stated, cats kill millions upon millions of birds each year and the stupid media made it highly rated.

They blame the trap-neuter-return and want cats to feel the burn. No more returning and such, instead bring on death's touch. Now it doesn't matter if it is cat, dog, bat or hog, I'd still rant about these big head, no brain idiots at my blog. So away we go with a rant that will show they are nothing but asses in glasses.

Look at the stats!
Oh no, it's those cats.
They are making the world a bad place,
Killing birds at a steady pace.

Let's shout it out to one and all.
So now people will ignore the big bouncing ball.
Meaning old rich bald men,
Can still go buy another den.

The world is going to shit,
As cats walk around in it.
Doing what nature intended,
Unlike the stuff humans have amended.

But shhhhhh let's not talk about that.
We have to blame the cat.
Who cares if we make more houses than we need?
Who cares if the world is run by greed?

Who cares if we like it when people get sick?
It adds more money in our pockets brick by brick.
Who cares if we want to start another war?
Who cares if people are killing each other in some far off shore?

Who cares if we never change from oil?
Isn't it fun to be greedy and watch all boil?
Who cares if cows produce tons of greenhouse gases?
We are big headed, no brained asses in glasses.

Who cares if many in the world are dying of starvation?
Who cares if you're charged up the ass with taxation?
Who cares if we produce more trash than half the planet?
At least our asses with glasses can fan it!

Next we'll blame the dog,
For farting and creating fog.
Then you can read and your little mind can believe that,
While our wallet gets fat.

For we really need that grant.
So we will ignore the harm of a nuclear plant.
The de-forestation, pfft who cares about that?
When we can simply blame the cat.

But why end there,
With the ordinary pets at your lair?
Rabbits chew,
That could turn all blue.

Hogs spread the mud.
Could slip and fall with a thud.
And oh my God!
Can't forget the cod.

I wonder what biased study we can cook up now,
So our asses with glasses can take a bow?
As long as the money comes in,
We'll make the results work towards the donors way for the win!

Many may know at my show that I hate studies a ton. For they are always biased when given a run. Cellphones don't cause cancer at all. Says the study done by the cell phone company at their hall. This drug is oh so safe to use. Says the drug company who gets your dues. And just like those, which will come as no shock, this whole thing is one big crock.

For the study from the asses in glasses that they spread to the masses, were done by those with an anti-cat track record out there on display. So what else would you expect them to say? Cats are good. Pffft another form of greed in the hood. Cats kill birds, humans shout nasty words, birds eat worms, those poor billions of worms are getting bird germs. Oh me, oh my, for the worms let's have a good cry.

Fact is humans have wiped more species off the planet than any animal, of any kind, ever has and ever will. Unless dinosaurs come back for a thrill. But we won't go there. So if getting rid of cats for birds is fair. Then I guess we better start killing off humans for all they've destroyed at their lair. And there was my rant for today class. It was a long one from my little rhyming ass.

Enjoy your winter, smash a printer.

Thursday, February 7, 2013

A Strange Pass Is Here As I Use Leer!

 Have to wait and see who this could be!

So for those that do not know the cat just went all Pokemon in the title today at my show. Leer is used to lower defense and all at that games hall. But sadly the cat doesn't even have to use that on some as they are just a tad umm dumb.

My password was cracked.
My computer was attacked.
Shouted some random nut,
As Pat strolled the Bestbuy hut.

What did you use,
To let your computer get such a bruise?
And then in came,
Something oh so lame.

Password123,
Was used by me.
Such a dumb ass,
The employee walked away shaking her head at the lass.

Now that was kind of rude,
As they aren't supposed to give attitude.
But really, password 123?
She really fell out of the dumb tree.

Why not use the best around.
These may not be able to be cracked by a hound.
Hello!
That password deserves jello.

drossap is great.
Dyslexic foes will be elate.
Did you catch that one?
Don't worry if you are lost a ton.

1212121212121212
Is the best you can do?
(insert name)
Wow, you must really want fame.

Put in the name of nanny.
Better off with the size of your fanny.
Use the name of a pet.
Pffft that is surely a safe bet.

Use the word toe.
I bet that will never be guessed at your show.
Oh and write it down too.
That much is true.

Then you can help out all,
Who see it at your hall.
Your favorite food.
Why not how many times you stood in the nude?

I could go on all day,
Like the woman at the Bestbuy bay.
Except she thought she was bright.
I enjoyed watching the cat fight.

Err umm human fight.
But then you women do bite.
And pull some hair.
So I suppose the assessment is kinda fair.

And now that is that. Use a password that makes no sense what so ever at your mat. Not password123 that is just asking to be hacked by a hillbilly. Maybe she will read me and get the hint this time? Or she will probably go with something oh so sublime. Password124 will come to pass. Some people can't even be helped by my little rhyming ass.

Enjoy your winter, smash a printer.

Wednesday, February 6, 2013

Do Not Be Rude Thank All Around You, Dude!

A version of me, have to wait and see!

You take for granted all the things each day. It is time the cat shouts out those that you cause dismay. Oh what you humans do. No wonder they hate you. The things you put them through without even having a clue. The cat is about to wise you up. This is even known by a butt sniffing pup.

That poor floor,
You tramp on it forever more.
Sweep it with a broom,
Or hurt it with a vacuum zoom.

That poor chair,
It is so broken in at your lair.
Plus consumes your gas,
And has to house your ass.

That poor TV,
You sit there and watch it with glee.
Making tramp reality TV play,
Each and every day.

That poor printer,
It knows it's almost winter.
Meaning you have to make a dash,
And grab something to smash.

That poor fan,
That all night you ran.
Getting it all hot under the collar,
Just so you can be cool and not holler.

That poor couch,
It is sure a big grouch.
The cat claws at it,
And more than one ass can lie on it or sit.

That poor door,
You slam it at your shore.
You knock and ring a bell.
Yelling through it for salesmen to go to hell.

That poor sink,
You give it more than a drink.
You drown it day after day.
Plus put nasty stuff in it from your food tray.

That poor garbage can.
Has to hold the trash of man.
Even something more vile,
Should germs cramp your style.

That poor loo,
It gets the worst of it from you.
All the crap that it has to take.
Surprised it hasn't offed itself for heaven's sake.

And that is just some,
Of what you make feel glum.
Now you know to pay them respect,
And stop with the neglect.

For one day they will rise,
And become more wise.
Then all will fall to the door,
And everything else at your shore.

Aren't you glad the cat clued you in? Now you can be nice at your bin. Say hello and greet them well. Then they may not damn you to Hell. But if you still ignore them with each pass, don't say you were not warned by my little rhyming ass.

Enjoy your winter, smash a printer.

Tuesday, February 5, 2013

Revenge Is Grand As One Takes A dVerse Stand!

The cat was thinking the other day how some hold a grudge forever at their bay. When really the other person does not even care unless of course they are aware. For a dVerse war goes on and they fight from dusk to dawn.

You stepped on my toe.
Do you want to go?
Wham! To the head.
That headache causes me dread.

Whack with a bat.
I squashed you flat.
Slam with a hammer.
Now you will forever stammer.

Cut with some glass.
A scar on your ass.
An axe to the arm.
I intended to cause harm.

A wood chipper for you.
Now you are gone from view.
You killed my brother!
Time to fight another.

Shot to the head.
Now long past dead.
You killed my friend.
Sense a growing trend?

The house catches fire.
Your car blows a tire.
Or just goes boom.
Either way spells doom.

You get chucked in front of a bus.
A pile of puss.
A tank runs you down.
Smushing you into something brown.

A big bomb drops on your head.
Now everyone is dead.
All from a step on the toe.
In which you could have said ouch and forget any thought of a blow.

But oh no,
The vengeance had to show.
And now in the ground you are,
Along with all friends and family near and far.

All because you could not walk away,
Or apologize if you see it the other way.
So the cat hopes it was fun.
To give such a run.

For in revenge there is no point.
Unless of course fun is what is looked for in your joint.
Then drop a waterballoon on their head.
Otherwise put such things to bed.

Before you go there forever,
Form such an endeavor,
Thinking you were clever.
May as well stand over a trap door with spikes and pulled the lever.

That just popped in as I saw two arguing at a nearby bin. Oh what you humans can do. I swear you have no clue. Have to get out your sass in such a way that isn't as fun as my little rhyming ass.

Enjoy your winter, smash a printer.

Monday, February 4, 2013

What Is The Perk If You Are Not At Work?

So you humans are supposed to whistle while you work. I don't know why that is such a perk. But the cat will pretend to comprehend your tiny minds and your rat race grinds. What happens if you can't whistle though? I guess that is a whole other show. Anyway, what are you supposed to do for the rest of the day?

Maybe hop on one foot?
Roll in some soot?
Spin around three times?
Try to make orange rhymes?

I guess there is tons,
To do when life runs,
Far away from work,
To make you and maybe others smirk.

You could roll a tire,
Set your pants on fire.
On or off,
Either way some may scoff.

Click your heels twice,
Forget the Toto vice.
Fling cat hair in the air.
Walk around bare.

I hear that is all the rage,
The cat told you that long ago at his page.
Play musical chairs,
Hop down some stairs.

Talk to the shadows on the wall.
Flush each toilet in the bathroom stall.
Go roll in the grass,
Or snow since winter has come to pass.

Although look bellow,
And avoid if it's yellow.
Instead join on in,
Go for the win.

Simply write out your name.
Of course that is more of a male game.
Balance a book on your head.
Look up and talk to the dead.

Watch the paint dry,
Still waiting on that from that Brian guy.
Suck back the booze,
And do a Tom Cruise.

Get your mind from the gutter,
And forgo the butter,
I meant Risky Business underwear,
Or jump on a couch with flair.

Play ball with your cat,
We'll take it and your bat.
Try to be a fly on the wall,
And have a great fall.

Giving Humpty Dumpty a run.
See, there is all kinds of fun.
You could even flip off the sun,
Or get slapped by a nun.

So for the rest of the time,
You now have a new chime.
Whistle while you work.
The rest of your life has a whole new perk.

Isn't that cat helpful today? I always am at my bay. Just giving plenty of things for you to do while you are not in your work's view. Of course if you can't whistle you can choose one of these as well. Although your co-workers might damn you to Hell. Even if you do whistle a tune like some loon. Who cares if they talk crass. I'll still wiggle my little rhyming ass.

Enjoy your winter, smash a printer.

Sunday, February 3, 2013

Go Away! No Bright Shadow Play!

Damn dVerse getting Pat to chase us about, flashing us with his camera as we shout. He wanted us to bring more fame apart from the rhyming game. So he chased us around hoping a weird shadow would be found. One that was bright and showed a figure in its light. Then we could say it predicted the winter and soon we could stop bashing the printer. But that plan made us form our own. It was time we put an end to the groundhog and his bright shadowy groan.


I was fast asleep,
When the camera gave a beep.
I told Pat to go bug Cassie,
She does think she is so classy.


See, what I mean?
Thinking she is so serene.
With her nose to the sky.
Posing for that Pat guy.


I was awake.
But I still would not partake.
Screw this shadow play.
That flash was too bright with its display.


Cassie climbed our door condo thing.
I think she too was sick of the flashy thing.
Then we heard a sound,
That was worse than a barking hound.


I checked to see if that fish was still good and dead.
Maybe Betsy put in some kind of noise to cause us dread.
Nope, that was not it.
So the search was on for this noisy fit


Cassie checked the cupboard and gave the all clear.
Of course she knew Pat was near.
So the door she didn't close,
Even finding time to strike a pose.


I checked each crack.
That sounds like a bad gutter attack.
Can you tell I was pissed?
This noise was at the top of my list.


Suddenly it caught Cassie's eye.
It was two creatures making this awful cry.
She said she would take the tall one.
So I got the one who fears the sun.


Yeah it was this over grown rat.
One half that was annoying the cat.
He thought he could hide here,
And be protected by my little rhyming rear.


Screw that!
Now he's stuffed and a play toy for the cat.
No more bright shadow play,
Adding any more winter to our bay.


But Cassie's was also a feat.
She did something really neat.
She found the other noisy nut,
And pulled out his hair until his mouth shut.


Thus now Bill Murray is bald as well as an ass.
Maybe next he'll turn into a lass.
If he lives the day all over again.
I hope he knows to avoid my den.

And so a bright shadow came to pass. Thanks to the cat and Cass. It was different than what you would expect, might not have caught it if you suffer brain neglect. For the over grown rat had a shiny bright life. Now he's mourned by his dear wife. From bright to dark all from being more annoying than a dog bark. And Bill Murray can now shine the shadows away with his bald head each and every day. Damn, that was quite the bright shadow pass. All better not mess with Cassie and my little rhyming ass.

Enjoy your winter, smash a printer.