Monday, June 2, 2014

Some Summer Events That May Or May Not Include Tents!

Summer will soon be here and it is time you planned what to do far and near. So the cat figured he would help you out with events that hold clout.

The baby jumping festival is near.
Don't land on them and cause fear.
Don an Elvis like costume and jump,
Hopefully the jumpers aren't plump.

The amazing ufo festival in Roswell.
That has to be so swell.
Can go and get a probe up your rear.
Cheaper than a doctor's visit I hear.

The state chip throw,
In Wisconsin is where you can go.
There people hurl dry cow poop.
Throw you for a loop?

The shopping cart race.
There is one you can embrace.
Hop in the cart,
And let your engines start.

The Wane Chicken Show.
Care for some chicken high and low?
Everything there is about chicken.
At least no cow turds you'll be pickin.

The Humongous Fungus Fest.
That will have you at your best.
Jump around and cheer a huge mushroom.
Eat it and you may bring doom.

Tarantula Awareness Festival is up.
May need something strong in your cup.
For one contest you show some fur,
The hairy leg contest can surely blur.

Can go and get ready for a thrill,
As at the festival of erotic arts you get your fill.
No need for a little blue pill,
As long as you have some umm will.

The cheese rolling festival is great.
Rolling cheese is such a fun fate.
Roll and roll some more.
Could get quite cheesy at your shore.

The wife carrying championship of the world.
That has to leave your toes curled.
Are you ready to up your life,
Be being the world champion at carrying your wife?

So there you go. Now you have things to do high and low. No need to thank the cat. Have fun throwing dry cow scat. Just wear gloves with such a pass and never touch my little rhyming ass.

Experience spring, have a fling.

83 comments:

  1. Replies
    1. It's now #21
      Only just begun!

      Hank

      Delete
    2. A big old streak
      Unless R or OE decided to speak

      Delete
  2. Festival galore never had known
    Fun choices if ever there is one
    Close your eyes
    Pick one that's nice
    Count your blessings and have fun!

    Hank


    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. As long as it isn't the cow crap one
      That should never ever be done

      Delete
  3. The UFO festival sounds like a o lot of probing will be going on.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yeah and all will enjoy
      Not a fun ploy

      Delete
  4. Hmm..who knew there were so many fests
    some rather strange ones you did suggest
    I wonder how many enter these contests
    would a loser cause a big protest
    perhaps, leading to a few arrests...

    The cheese one made me smile
    I thought of that movie Mouse Hunt
    haven't seen that on TV in awhile
    that mouse they did have to confront
    as he was causing havoc at their lair
    making cheese at the end with flair

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. So many out there
      At many a strange lair
      One just has to look
      And leave their nook
      Or maybe create their own
      The kind of a umm groaning tone lol

      Mouse Hunt was a fun one
      That mouse sure could run

      Delete
    2. There's a Cat Festival in Belgium... HERE

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    3. That is one big arse cat
      must be a lot of hot air in that

      Delete
    4. I bet it's kind a stinky too
      Like old cheese in a kitty shoe ;)

      Delete
    5. Yeah probably smells musty
      And is quite dusty

      Delete
  5. I will pass on the state chip throw
    I have much better places to go
    But the cheese rolling festival sounds kinda fun
    I would likely be super full when I'm done

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You can go cut the cheese
      Hmmm to some that may not please

      Delete
  6. Thank you cat for the festival names
    I would enter with a bunch of the dames
    Off to Roswell we'd be ready to go
    And watch the ET's put on a show
    Hairy leg contest would be grand
    Toss your razor far into the sand
    The shopping cart race takes the cake
    But first, the cake, do you bake?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I'll bake a cake
      To watch you partake
      Might not be fit to eat
      But he worms could have a treat lol

      Delete
  7. The baby jumping festival?!? Please tell me that is not a real thing. All I can envision is a bunch of babies on an enclosed trampoline and judges putting up numbers to rate their jumps...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Sadly it is very very true
      And rated one of the most dangerous in the world too

      Delete
  8. Actually, I like tarantula's. The ones we have are harmless. Imagine living underground all of your life and coming to the surface only once a year.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yeah that would be quite the life
      Full of strife

      Delete
  9. Ooh, the Humongous Fungus Fest! I know one person who will be there. I once went on a date with a girl who was a professional mushroom categorizer. Yes, that's a real thing. She loved mushrooms more than life itself and talked about them endlessly. And yes, I can promise you she was the most boring person I have ever met in my life.

    And yes, I really mean it when I say she will be there. She lives for stuff like that and often "presents slideshows" at them.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Damn, who would want to sit through such a slide show
      Can just picture mushroom nerds all in a row

      Delete
  10. There's a UFO festival? I'd say that sounds like fun, but I'm a little afraid of some of the people who would be attending...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yeah they may scare
      So attendees beware

      Delete
  11. Summer festivals are the best. Sounds like the ones you've dug up will put you to the test.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. They can be grand
      Unless it's many of the above across the land

      Delete
  12. Lots of fun summer things to do. Now all that was very funny. I want to hurl dry cow poop. EWWWWW. Thanks for the smile this morning.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. haha hurling dry cow poop
      Will sure throw you for a loop

      Delete
  13. We wouldn't mind going to the UFO Festival...we could catch up with old friends!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. The martians are your friends?
      Did they probe your rear ends

      Delete
  14. You should get a job as a travel agent...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hmm someone I think they'd avoid me
      Or I'd just attract the crazy

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    2. Crazy people aplenty so ca-ching!

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    3. I suppose
      Solve my financial woes

      Delete
  15. Why, Pat, you've left out
    A couple of fests for which we might shout
    Frozen Dead Guy Fest with coffin races,
    Slow Mo Parade and a bunch of blue faces.
    And then there's Mike the Headless Chicken Day...
    What more can I say?!?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. The first and last I used before
      So tried not to repeat at my shore
      Never knew of the second though
      As they go all slow mo

      Delete
  16. People celebrate the strangest things!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. That they do
      Strange they are at every zoo

      Delete
  17. Baby jumping… is that a fact?
    I guess it's not the same as getting sacked
    Nope, no Elvis jumpers for me
    No impersonators either at my sea
    But a cat in a jumper might be cool
    If the ladies get to hot they can jump in a pool
    Or catch a ride with an alien guy
    I'm told they're kinda fly
    Hurling poo
    What an odd thing to do
    Unless you like the stink
    Smelling your hands without a blink
    Is that cheese I smell
    Making me yell hell
    That worse than poo
    Or an old stinky shoe
    Throw it, don't let it roll
    Nope, I don't want any of that in a bowl
    If I were to carry my wife
    I'd lose my life ;)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Well a cat in a baby onesie has been done
      So kind of like a cat in a jumper under my sun
      Poor Cassie got that
      And not the cat
      You can fly with the prober
      Might be an ear lober
      And cut the cheese
      If you please
      Just squeeze
      So nothing comes but a breeze

      Delete
    2. That breeze might be stinky n' stuff
      Of which at my sea I've got plenty enough
      A baby onesie is like a mini jumper
      I'd like to use it to stuff our local happy humper'
      No, not that way he might like it too much
      Notice that typo and such?
      A B-minus for me in the place to be
      Wish I had more dough to feel free

      Delete
    3. Yeah more dough be nice
      But all we get is rice
      With a stinky breeze
      And a humper who likes to tease

      Delete
  18. Hmm...if I had to select one, it'd be the shopping cart race. BUT, I think we'll stick to the agenda we already have (no offense, of course, to your very grand list of suggestions and ideas). :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. haha you wouldn't board a ufo
      Geez, to a far far far away place you wouldn't like to go

      Delete
  19. Not a single one of those events is one my summer to do list, and yet I don't feel a bit of regret ;)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You will
      I hear cheese rolling is such a thrill

      Delete
  20. orlin & cassie....can ya guess wear we WONT bee !!

    N if cows can toss poop why cant we ....just sayin.....gonna keep thiz in mind next time we jump outta de box N bee fore buryin....

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Toss away
      And make it a game at your bay

      Delete
  21. ha. i am fairly certain they showed the wife carrying competition on ESPN last year....yikes on the baby jumping, wont be good for much without their stuffing....

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. haha never knew they showed it there
      I guess it is no longer rare

      Delete
  22. Ha, thanks for recognizing the 'chip throw' in my home state!
    Never have viewed it, though I don't suppose it is too late.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yeah you could give it a go
      You might win, never know

      Delete
  23. can Jr jump

    sounds like a festival created by chumps

    ReplyDelete
  24. I'm as aware of tarantulas as I ever want to be.
    Just reading that made a shiver go through my knees!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. All those animals and a furry spider scares you
      Geez, maybe I'll send you a few lol

      Delete
  25. Replies
    1. You're no fun
      Need to give all a run

      Delete
  26. Replies
    1. That is the worst
      Such a nasty burst

      Delete
  27. Sadly I don't think any of them
    are near where I reside
    I am truly missing out on some fun
    and this makes me sad as I abide.

    betty

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. haha I bet you will get over it
      Especially the one with cow umm spit

      Delete
  28. There is a garlic fest
    Down the coast from us
    people rave about it
    good for the cold
    and even garlic icecream but I guess
    I'll take the tablets instead...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. haha yeah tablets are easier to do
      Garlic can sure help though at ones zoo

      Delete
  29. There really are some odd festivals around.

    ReplyDelete
  30. I would like to go & watch the funny ones, not the scary ones (tarantulas) ~

    The last one made me smile ~ Are they really true?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yep, all are true
      Plenty to go and view

      Delete
  31. Wow, what a great list of choice things we could do for fun,
    Spiders, crap, rolling cheese, how can I pick just one?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Pick three
      Then you will have triple the glee

      Delete
  32. I have a lot of things planned for this summer, but sadly, none of these are on the list. However, I may detour for some cow poop tossing if I get to toss it at someone I don't like.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. haha that is the only reason
      To toss such a thing in any season

      Delete
  33. I'm happy just to be able to stay home and not have to work.

    http://joycelansky.blogspot.com

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. That would make me happy too
      Here at my zoo

      Delete
  34. Your summer activities give me a scare
    Most would leave me feeling quite bare
    For my personal pleasure within my reach
    I'd much rather spend my time at the beach

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I guess boring works too
      As the sand fleas eat you

      Delete
  35. I guess if I was looking for something to do... which I am not, by the way. I would like to see a shopping cart race.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. haha that could end bad
      But be fun to watch at ones pad

      Delete