Thursday, July 3, 2014

Things You Can Say Part One At My Bay!

A new idea struck and it could be fun with any luck. So away the cat will go and we shall see which way the wind does blow. Things are only good to say if talking about certain things at play. This you shall see, trust me.

Things you can say about your house,
Whether alone or close,
That you can't say about your wife,
Unless you want her to end your life.

That needs a trim.
Blurt it out on a whim,
Things could turn grim,
Unless pointing to a tree limb.

That is one big backyard.
Pick a card, any card.
One will leave you black and blue,
The other she will run over you.

That hallway can fit many men.
Like one or ten?
Geez, you might be out of a lair,
Or maybe she'll like to share.

It has sprung a leak.
May not be for the meek.
Could get a clean clock,
Or pitched off a dock.

I'm at a point in life where I need to downsize.
Word to the wise,
Cover your eyes,
And your umm french fry.

There is pet hair everywhere.
What do you care?
Just pet it,
To avoid a fit.

The garden is withering.
Things may not go slithering,
You may get a trip,
To the big snip snip.

There are too many steps to the top,
May end up in a flop.
You may get beat with a mop,
Or a stove pot top.

That frame is rather wide.
Ooops, you died.
Should have stayed quiet,
Instead of inciting a riot.

So the cat has helped you out once more. Now be sure and add house to such sayings at your shore. You might wish to point too, just in case she second guesses you. Now I will go roll in the grass with my ever so fun little rhyming ass.

Fill your rummer, get drunk all summer.

74 comments:

  1. It shouldn't end your life
    To say such things to your wife...
    But prepare to have them pointed back at you
    If you say such silly things at your zoo!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. haha turned around you say
      I can take it at my bay

      Delete
  2. 'That you can't say about your wife'
    Truly said the loving Mrs is one's life
    Through thick and thin
    She is always within
    She helps most kindly one to survive!

    Hank

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. There through all
      Even when compared to the wall

      Delete
  3. Hilarious! There was a recent Whose Line is it Anyway where the 'Scenes from a Hat' was exactly that - things you can say about your house but not your spouse.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. haha yeah I saw that too
      They beat me to it at my zoo
      But I'm three months ahead
      So I first put it to bed

      Delete
  4. those saying you should pitch
    you may need to flip the switch
    or you could be digging a ditch
    dreaming of ways to get rich

    remember to reference your house
    or you might offend your spouse...
    an argument you don't want to rouse
    perhaps, the cat should find a mouse




    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. A big ditch with lots of dough
      I'd dig that at my show
      Just point to the house at your sea
      And no harm should come to thee

      Delete
  5. This comment has been removed by the author.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Words can send you for a loop
    Don't end up in the chicken coop
    Better to think before you speak
    Or like a mouse you can squeek
    (Sorry, the first one didn't turn out right)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Could squeak as you get slapped
      Or locked in a closet and trapped

      Delete
  7. A house
    A spouse
    Time to downsize
    I didn't realise
    Yep, go play in the grass
    Roll around on your ass
    Roll in the poop
    Then grab the scoop.......

    ReplyDelete
  8. i always keep my french fries covered.
    and i def know what not to say to my lover
    never use the word freak either

    have yet to be beat with a mop though
    that would be a little out of hand at my show

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. haha know when to just gawk
      And not say a word to talk
      Freak isn't a good word?
      What about freaky stuff like a zombie bird?
      Good you can avoid the mop
      Hit with that would be a flop

      Delete
  9. And all through the house,
    the kittens played catch the mouse,
    Swat pounce weeee crack,
    For crying out loud--Give me my sanity back!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. haha they will play
      All through the day
      And bite away
      Having their say

      Delete
  10. Yes, this is awesome. I love it.

    "This one's so old now. I think I'm going to sell it and get a newer one."
    "It's boring on the inside and the exterior needs some major touching up."
    "It smells like something crawled inside and died, so now we've just got to air it out until the stench is gone."

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. lol those first two may only get a slap or a kick
      The last one she'd chop off your ummm wick lol

      Delete
  11. So funny, Cat, you are wiith this
    Messing with marital bliss
    What about things not to say
    To the husband at one's bay?
    "That's way too small"
    Set him up for a nasty fall
    "How long is this going to take?"
    Might make his knees quake
    I'm sure you have this up your sleeve
    Scheduled already for another eve
    But couldn't resist the chance
    To inspire another "things not to say" dance

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. haha the way to small remark
      Will sure ignite a spark
      Have a few lined up at my zoo
      As they are fun to do

      Delete
  12. How about: "Whew, that's a fixer upper." hahahahhaa

    This post is funny. :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. hahaha that one works too
      Might want to run from view

      Delete
  13. hey, cat hair is supposed to be everywhere"

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Just adds to the home
      Where the cats roam

      Delete
  14. words can sure offend when taken out of context. funny post

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. That they can indeed
      Have to make sure the right ones take seed

      Delete
  15. You're sure on today, funny post. I'll just think such things from now on

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thinking is better to do
      Then no slap will come due at your zoo

      Delete
  16. It sure pays to mind what one says!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Have to keep it in mind
      Or could get a kick to the behind

      Delete
  17. Can't we say anything at your bay?
    If not, why can't we have our way?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You can say what you like
      Just remember some may want you on a spike haha

      Delete
    2. Just give us a mike
      We'll bring a pike
      For protection
      from the mass collection

      Delete
    3. Stab them in the face
      or strangle them with a shoe lace

      Delete
  18. orlin N cassie....can we say de houz round heer in trout towne haz ta see de food serviss gurl IN de shower ....coz it canna ezcape N run like hell like we can frum frite....itz noe wunder de poor walls look like they due....

    we feel sorree for R houz N we can say sew coz it bee troo ☺

    happee week oh end N heerz ta bonito flakes, bass N bloo gill ♥

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. lol might want to keep that to yourself
      Or sea may stuff you on a self

      Delete
  19. Now I know what to do with all of Schultz's hair that's been floating around the floor!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. With this trip
      The cat gives a good tip

      Delete
  20. Things I am allowed to say?/Is the cat mad or has it lost its way?/Doesn't it know there's no political correctness at my bay?/When I open my mouth everyone scurries away.

    Greetings from London.

    ReplyDelete
  21. That's very true that the things said about a house shouldn't be said about a spouse...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. haha have to remember that
      At every mat

      Delete
  22. Hmmmm... goes both ways
    I venture to say
    And you'll have to escape
    If you mention carpets and drapes

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yep, can go every which way
      So no need for new carpet on display lol

      Delete
  23. Perhaps dog hair is everywhere
    but I do't see it at my lair!
    And in the end...who cares??
    Smiles.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. haha suck it up in the vacuum
      Then n longer will it loom

      Delete
  24. Not sure if you said some of the things I think you said,
    The innuendoes have gone right over my head.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. haha oh what did you think
      Did I bring you to the brink

      Delete
  25. Hubby knows to say no
    when I ask does this make me look fat
    even if it does,
    if he says so, he goes splat

    betty

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Smart guy indeed
      There at your feed

      Delete
  26. nobody wants a clock that is not clean

    if there is dirt, time can not be seen

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Might be better off though
      Unless you run late at your show

      Delete
  27. I definitely don't want to hear about a big back yard! lol!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. But but it has lots of grass
      And it is green in mass lol

      Delete
  28. Yes, although men are getting a little sensitive, too! Marriage definitely teaches you to censor your thoughts.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yeah guys are too
      I guess sensitive times are due

      Delete
  29. My hubby is such a dumbass and says things like this all the time.
    I am thinking he is way overdue for a kick in the behind.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. haha that may do the trick
      Just a little kick

      Delete
  30. This is so funny!
    Thanks for the big laugh!

    ReplyDelete
  31. I so understand the pet hair, my rats shed like crazy. Might have to make a fur ball out of all of it.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Even when you think it is gone
      There it is with its hair con

      Delete
  32. What would we do without you?
    Keep us in check with all these clues!
    haha.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. That cat just likes to help out
      With a little shout

      Delete