Saturday, November 29, 2014

More Reasons Not To At Your Zoo!

Was on Twitter the other day, bored at my work bay. What else can I say? But that is the typical 9-5 way. Anyway, saw some more gems come due and just had to share them at my zoo.

"My outside voice broke"
I hope you don't choke.
"That dog is so mean."
Did it eat your spleen?

"What? A mailing list and you get free stuff?"
Oh your ploy I can see right through easy enough.
"I done it today!"
Umm err okay.

"Shoes on the left, shoes on the right."
I guess now we just need to yell, fight!
"My toaster tried to eat me."
I take it it failed at eating thee?

"Thinking out loud today."
You must type loud at your bay.
"Can't do it....Can't do it."
Take exlax and you'll do it in a bit.

"How to read literature like a proffessor in 5 days."
I take it you aren't a professor, at least one that pays.
"The most comprennhessive stuy EVER dun!"
Somehow I think I'll skip that one.

"Click this link and get xxx photos of me."
And you can get a virus for free.
"Man inspires world to love their job."
Sorry, not about to join that mob.

"Y do I never get my dat?"
I just don't know, mate!
"Arggg my pants are on fire."
If you are typing it it can't be dire.

"Shrinkage, deciving people about..."
Come now, don't pout.
"real motherhood with eight arms rocks."
Hmm time to change the locks?

"Make today count, eat math homework."
That is sure a yummy perk.
"Magazines are dead."
Did you just get out of bed?

"My schedulur brok to peaces today."
That isn't the only thing broke at your bay.
"Buy me a brand new car!"
Go try a drunk at the bar.

See, now don't you want to go tweet with glee? Everything is there for thee. You can find everything you want and more. All you have to do is explore. Click a link and get a free std, at least the kind that causes your computer no glee. I guess it can amuse to make time pass and give blog fodder to my little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

66 comments:

  1. Waste of precious time these tweeting stuff
    Just weirdos and other things good for a laugh
    Too many received it bothers
    Mostly just from strangers
    Blogging and perhaps some FB are good enough

    Hank

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Blogging is all I need
      The rest I barely bother to use or read

      Delete
  2. Those same people end up on your blog
    When they search the 'net in a fog!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. That they do
      But they say nothing at my zoo

      Delete
  3. We need to find out how to get off those darn mailing lists!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yeah they take your email and stick you on
      Hoping you'll fall for their con

      Delete
  4. Twitter is great for people today
    Such trivial things they offer to say
    I find it boring, it doesn't make sense
    Smarter is the post that goes in a fence

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yeah smarter is the wood
      Or maybe they are just misunderstood? lol

      Delete
  5. Ha!! Loved this one the best-
    "Shoes on the left, shoes on the right."
    I guess now we just need to yell, fight!
    Let's get ready to shoe ruuummmbbble!!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. A shoe rumble would be fun to sea
      Bet they'd do more than kick each other in the knee

      Delete
  6. so what is a stuy? i might want to give that a try,
    i --- know all about outside and inside voices
    and that is more about choices...oy...so many people
    loud this time of year...when beating each other up for toys
    at the store to spread cheer....

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I guess stuy is a study that fell flat?
      It sure beats the cat
      And yeah they scream and yell
      Getting the toy and damning all to hell

      Delete
  7. Funny those with awful thoughts never think out loud

    nobody hearing that would be proud

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yeah they just type
      Never use it on skype

      Delete
  8. This is why I'm not much on Twitter
    nothing people say make sense
    I rather spend my time on blogs or FB
    with the time I spend at my bench

    betty

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Blogs are better to spend time with indeed
      Much more on the bench then some twitter feed

      Delete
  9. "My schedulur brok to peaces today."
    Pure person distracted, need help at his bay.
    Or maybe it's opposite he found the way...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. True, could have found his way
      Making for a happier day

      Delete
  10. Methinks that if your pants are smoking
    You might have a fit of choking
    Or maybe they're on fire
    With desire
    In which case you need a cold soaking

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. haha a cold shower
      Or lit up at the howling hour

      Delete
  11. I tried that silly Twitter and could not get interested in it at all. It all goes by like the speed of lightning. Not for me. I do this for entertainment not a chore. Have a great day Pat.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yeah if it is a chore and a bore
      Don't bother with the crap at your shore

      Delete
  12. Twitter requires no talent and no real effort. And I don't buy that "It takes real intelligence to express a thought with a limited character count" Bloggers have a responsibility to their readers. If you're not creative, intelligent or funny you can't hold an audience. Twitter on the other hand.....

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yeah twitter you can say a bunch of crap
      And they'll follow any old chap
      Blogger you have to hold attention
      To even get a mention

      Delete
  13. Man inspires world to love their job
    obviously he hasn't worked at some places
    or he might want to turn that door knob
    make an exit and explore new spaces...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Find the exit sign
      As all jobs aren't divine

      Delete
    2. Mine is great
      I get to work till it's really late
      Ten hours a day
      What can I say...
      Jump in a bay?

      Delete
  14. Twitter isn't a place to have much of a conversation, or anything really

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Just say something absurd
      Or flip it the bird

      Delete
  15. Did someone really tweet that their toaster ate them? Come on now, Cat, this cant be real!!! Only you would have such crazy followers. Hahaha

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. haha I watched the tweet line
      And it was seen by the feline

      Delete
  16. Ha ha, now I know why I don't do twitter
    so much senseless chatter chitter
    would get me so much in a dither
    that under my chair I would slither!!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Beats under the bed
      There you might bump your head

      Delete
  17. That's why I'm not on Twitter
    No time for mindless chatter :)
    Some funny Twit's you found
    Lots of typos abound :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Typos abound there
      Even when they swear

      Delete
  18. I wish I could say I didn't laugh at the Ex Lax ... but I totally did. Boy humor... and I'm surrounded by boys, so I guess it's rubbed off a bit. ;)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. lol alright to laugh indeed
      Boy humor works at our feed
      Cassie is the only lass
      So she has to put up with my rhyming ass

      Delete
    2. She tolerates you because you feed her. ;)

      Kidding. Sort of... :)

      Delete
    3. haha that may be it
      AS when she's fed there is no hiss or spit

      Delete
  19. Wow, now I'm really tempted to tweet. Sounds so very neat. Blogging is really enough for me, at least for now at my boring sea.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Blogging is enough all around
      Twitter lots of nonsense can be found

      Delete
  20. I am not keen on Twittter, tried it once, that was enough.
    Good poem Pat/

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. At least it was tried
      For a tweet ride

      Delete
  21. Whenever I get a DM on Twitter, guaranteed it's spam.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yep, always spam every time
      With their DM chime

      Delete
  22. Never tried a tweet as it never seemed neat

    ReplyDelete
  23. Some people need to just keep their thoughts inside of their heads and off Twitter.

    ReplyDelete
  24. How to read literature like a proffessor... Don't you mean how to spel um spell like a professore? Twitter... What's that?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Spel or spell or speel it could be
      On twitter it all you can see

      Delete
    2. I only tit when I tweet
      When someone's tickling my feet
      I only tweet when I twitter
      You know, when I'm on the um... spitter :p

      Delete
    3. A tit-ing tweeter
      Couldn't be sweeter
      With a tweeting titer
      On the shitter

      Delete
  25. Personally I kind of enjoy Twitter. I actually like it better than Facebook

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Oh yeah beats facebook
      But much doesn't at ones nook

      Delete
  26. It might help to use a dictionary
    I'd hate to be the twitter fairy
    Message lost in translation
    All across Internet Nation

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yeah it might help
      But then they'd yelp
      Poor time wasted doing it
      Wouldn't be a hit

      Delete
  27. haha, what a clever way to look at tweets!!! I love them all bundled together with your rhymes. It also makes them sound even more vapid.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. haha yeah they are fun to use
      And rhyme away as I abuse

      Delete