Wednesday, February 4, 2015

Still Insecure You Say? I'll Make That Go Away!

So the cat has a sure fire way to cure any insecurity you have today, unless you are very very old like Manzi though, and in diapers, unlike Manzi, at your show. If that is the case stop now, your diaper rash may get offended by today's meow. Then what do I care? Read away at my lair.


Raise your head high.
Look to the sky.
No insecurity is had.
Just be nice and glad.

What? Still mad?
Still oh so sad?
Still in a rut?
I bring you a butt!

A tummy hanging over.
The love of every rover.
Then wings of a gnat.
Did I mention the fat?

Even if just maybe,
The fat is baby,
Fat is fat.
Let's move on from that.

Droppings that slide,
Creating an incoming tide,
But brown and not blue.
Bigger than pigeon dropping too.

A rash that will itch,
Like one rolled in a ditch,
And caught some nasty disease.
Also a smell with the breeze.

Are you getting me?
Now be happy.
Still not there?
One more thing at my lair.

That isn't rain.
Not fuel from a plane.
Remember the rule of yellow,
Don't let it touch you bright or mellow.

See, poof, insecurity gone,
All thanks to my lawn.
What it is still there?
Sigh, fine I'll spell it out so you are aware.

As insecure as you may be,
At least you aren't something else at your sea.
Like a fluttering ancient child,
With a diaper that never gets changed, extra fat, an ass rash, creating rain, creating slimy snow and running wild.

See, now you are no longer insecure. Doesn't that just have such an allure? Cupid must be a tough gig indeed. Always on the go even when a loo is in need. At least you aren't that. Now no need to be insecure about any other scat. If you find that coming to pass, watch out for a bombshell mass. You have been warned class by my ever so secure little rhyming ass.

Enjoy your winter, smash a printer.

122 comments:

  1. "So the cat has a sure fire way to cure any insecurity"
    It is such a wonderful thing to be a Cat can't you see?
    There is always a cure
    Very simple and pure
    If one tries hard enough it will always be there surely!

    Hank

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Just give it a go
      And what do you know

      Delete
  2. Wait…did you just call me fat? I mean, geez, I gained a few pounds…but fat?

    (still having issues with Blogger/GoDaddy - don't bother stopping by…)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Cyclops are allowed to have weight
      It's how they mate lol
      Geez not fixed yet
      Admit it, you jut banned this pet

      Delete
    2. Did you call her fat?
      Well, how about that?

      Delete
    3. Maybe the cat did
      But she never flipped her lid

      Delete
    4. She will bake you a special cake
      That I'm sure you shouldn't take

      Delete
    5. I won't indeed
      Don't eat that at my feed

      Delete
  3. Oh god, the picture you paint
    Makes most of us faint
    You'd think that with age
    Diapers would be the rage
    Perhaps it makes one secure
    For those who drink beer

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. So they can just go
      And let the beer flow
      In one end, out the other
      Nostrils everywhere they smother

      Delete
    2. lol never you say
      Fountain of youth at your bay?

      Delete
  4. That was quite the insecure chime
    I guess insecurity can hit any time
    perhaps, a cure is to eat key lime
    oh, wait that might be a crime
    as you don't want to become fat
    exercise the mind, says the cat
    umm..or body like that of Pat
    gotta run, thanks for the chat

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Exercise both
      And there will be growth
      Insecurity will fly away
      Lime are nasty I say

      Delete
  5. Manzi is not old
    I find her to be youthfully bold
    And I like how you put things in perspective here
    Thankfully we're not babies with dirty rears

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yep, not whining little child
      Shooting arrows and running wild
      Youthfully bold you say
      That works at her bay

      Delete
    2. Never a scold
      When called youthfully bold
      For 85 trips around the sun
      Takes a lot of energy if you run

      Delete
    3. Sure put lots to shame
      As with most 30 years olds you can do the same

      Delete
  6. If that's Cupid, hope he doesn't come near me. Don't want anything dropped on me.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. If his diaper is filled
      You won't be thrilled

      Delete
  7. Great verse Pat, one should always hold their head high.

    ReplyDelete
  8. It is hard not to be a little bit insecure. But great way of looking at it, It is almost better to be insecure.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Better to be insecure than a diaper wearer flying around indeed
      That is something none need

      Delete
  9. It could always be worse.
    We could be those things you said and curse. Lol...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. lol two for one
      Meaning brains are well done

      Delete
  10. After reading your stuff
    Insecure I am not
    about too much these days
    which could be a good spot

    betty

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. A good spot to be
      Flipping the bird to insecurity

      Delete
  11. Mushy is highly offended by your diaper rash comment. Hmph!!!!

    Keeping a positive outlook always helps beat insecurities...but I am not sure how positive you could be about yellow snow!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. lol poor her
      The cat will send her some fur
      That could help
      No diaper rash making her yelp

      Well you can be positive you will avoid it
      Every little bit

      Delete
    2. I asked her...and she said she would rather deal with a rash than a hairy bum!!

      Delete
    3. I guess the cat will save his hair
      He has plenty to spare

      Delete
  12. I'm insecure no more
    When baby powder's in store.
    Thanks Pat.
    I needed that.

    ReplyDelete
  13. Insecure is me
    Since you described me to a 'T'.
    Next, the wheelchair is on it's way...
    Maybe I'll roll up to your bay
    And toss my used nappies in,
    Before rolling off with a confident grin! =D

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. lol may watch where you roll
      Because you may have to pay a toll
      And if you don't pay
      A can of cat poop may come your way

      Delete
  14. Insecure?
    What a caper.
    In a toilet stall.
    With no paper.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Maybe there's a spout
      To splash up and clean you out

      Delete
  15. Manzi old?
    That's what you said?
    Wow, that's cold.
    But...better than dead.
    ;-)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Al
      When one is dead it's really cold
      Yes it's better to take the old I'm told
      ~~~~~~~~~~
      Of course, it depends on where one goes. It could
      be really hot too. uummm

      Delete
    2. lol old beats dead indeed
      Rather be alive than feed a weed
      Could be hot
      If below one is to rot

      Delete
    3. My father is passed.
      No crying or tearful showers.
      For he was a bit of an ass.
      Does Hell has visiting hours?

      Delete
    4. But you might not get out
      One way trip like a hooked trout

      Delete
    5. The cat is as rude as a flee
      Manzi is as cool as can be
      Taking care of my plant too
      Wish she could help me find my shoe

      Delete
    6. The cat loves to be rude
      And give attitude

      Delete
    7. It's like a special gift
      And the British say lift

      Delete
    8. Beats being a spanker
      Or called a wanker

      Delete
  16. I am pretty secure in my insecurity!

    ReplyDelete
  17. My head is raised.
    My cup half full.
    time to quit the negative bull.

    VR Barkowski

    ReplyDelete
  18. I have enough butts, thank you very much.

    And my car is covered in bird droppings. Never park under a bridge.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Wise advice
      At least it isn't full of mice

      Delete
  19. Everyone insecure
    with Valentine day allure
    I guess, Cupid is always there
    to drop on us arrow .

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Cupid can be there
      But if he comes near my lair
      A can of cat crap he shall receive
      That'll make him leave lol

      Delete
  20. Always with some humor. Insecure? Let's count the many ways.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Humor helps out
      When insecurity is about

      Delete
  21. Powders, ointments, gels and creams
    Help prevent the rashy screams

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Glad I have no need
      My ocd would have a fit at my feed

      Delete
  22. hah, we're all entitled a little insecurity,
    as long as it resolves itself sure-e-ly (made that word up).

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. lol with a made up word
      Can resolve itself is what I heard

      Delete
  23. Too much insecurity at my shore,
    what a bore,
    but hey, writing is the cure!

    ReplyDelete
  24. Insecurity is better than being cupid

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. No diaper for me
      So I agree with thee

      Delete
  25. I'll remember the yellow rule. It sounds like I should remember the brown one, too. I don't want any foul goo coming due!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Two rules to keep in mind
      As they sure aren't kind

      Delete
  26. I'll remember the yellow rule. It sounds like I should remember the brown one, too. I don't want any foul goo coming due!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Double the remembrance at your sea
      Look at thee

      Delete
  27. I am glad I am not one whose diaper never gets changed
    as that can lead to being deranged...and it stinks too
    best just to go to the lew....a lot of it is in what we believe
    about ourselves....

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yep, nasty as can be
      Loo is a much better spree
      True, what we believe
      Can or can't help us achieve

      Delete
  28. This put me in a better mood. :) Thanks!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Happy to up the mood
      With a little rhyming attitude lol

      Delete
  29. Nothing wrong with being a little insecure. If people weren't, they would cancel my fitness classes. Then I'd be pissed. See, insecurity can be a good thing!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. lol I suppose there is a positive to it all
      Just proved that at my hall

      Delete
    2. I'd sign up anyway
      Too bad I ain't got no energy today ;)

      Delete
    3. Likely story
      In all its glory

      Delete
  30. Oh happy day :) Thanks for the encouragement Cat.

    ReplyDelete
  31. Many things to look forward to,
    Like nappy changes,
    When I'm long overdue.
    I truly hope that's years away,
    Guess it Depends,
    On how my future plays.

    Thanks for the happy thoughts, Pat!

    Julie

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hopefully it doesn't come to pass
      Depends can be a real pain in the ass lol

      Delete
  32. Plenty of worse things out there than being insecure

    ReplyDelete
  33. The diaper thing got me-are we talking babies or 89 yr olds? Now the insecurity is gone-love the poem:)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. lol both are bad
      Glad none is now had

      Delete
  34. orlin N cassie

    we like ta make de food gurl feel in secure...everee time we seez her in de bath room.....we hurl !! ♥♥♥

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. lol a hair ball on the floor
      She'll be insecure forever more

      Delete
  35. Cupid is pissing on one of my sons right now and his insecurity is high. I want to tell him to ignore that fat baby and move on.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Damn, that is a nasty thought
      Needs to get out of Cupid's pissing plot

      Delete
  36. I might always be insecure
    But perhaps not toward subjects so mature
    Me, I worry my writing won't be good enough
    So I stay busy crocheting, quilting and stuff

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Bah, you never know
      Until you let it flow

      Delete
  37. Wow, my insecurities are all gone!
    You did the trick!
    That was so schmick! ;)

    ReplyDelete
  38. Well this certainly took good care of my insecurities today
    Unless of course I need to go outside into the fray
    A great big hat I may need to wear
    Or carry an umbrella to ward off the scare

    Love that header at the top of this blog. The cats look so gorgeous and of course so does Pat.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Glad they are long gone
      Who needs such a con
      And which header was that?
      They changed with every stat

      Delete
  39. some people need a security blanket for their lack of confidence and shyness

    Like Charlie Brown's Linus.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. But the blanket gets old
      And can grow mold

      Delete
  40. I'm feeling much better, but maybe it's just my security sweater. My cat is quite fat. What do you think of that?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Just wants to keep warm
      In case of a snow storm

      Delete
  41. I'm a bit uncertain about leaving a comment. ;-)

    ReplyDelete
  42. What can I say?
    My insecurities have suddenly gone away :)

    ReplyDelete
  43. When I am down, I will now say "At least I'm not cupid!" What a hellacious life he must have.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. A sucky one indeed
      That he has at his feed

      Delete
  44. Better beware
    Of the Cherub so bare
    If he shoots you with his arrow
    Fly to Rio de Janeiro

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Anything good there?
      Sure beaches where some go bare

      Delete
  45. A tummy isn't yummy
    Reminds me of my mommy
    Gives me a rash too
    Still looking for that shoe
    What am I gonna do?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Gonna have to search far and wide
      Maybe you need a shoe guide

      Delete
    2. Might be outta luck
      But try a shoe truck

      Delete