The dumb criminals are back for another go around at my shack. I could do a post every day for a year on these nuts. There are that many dumb ones in ruts. But that is no surprise at all. Plus it would be too restrictive anyway at a my hall.
There was a pair,
Who didn't forget underwear.
Sadly, they left their phone on though.
And butt dialed 911 on the go.
One guy was running away,
Not wanting to pay.
It looked like he was well ahead,
Oopsy, ran right into a parked cop car, such dread.
Another sure could run,
Took off after the deed was done.
He ran towards the sliding door,
Used the wrong side and glass in his head decided to explore.
One guy decided to rob a convenience store.
He thought it would be easy at such a shore.
He went to hop the desk and get to the cash.
Steel chair to the head ended his bash.
One tried to run away,
But dropped the loot he stole with much on display.
His saggy pants fell as he ran.
He fell proving to be a flash in the pan.
Criminals hiding out,
Believed a great shout.
Free beer for all.
Gave their address, oopsy, down they fall.
Ready to make all hit the deck.
Get ready for the greatest criminal ever chants.
Easy to find, as he was wearing clown pants.
A game can come in handy too.
A cop entered a broken into zoo.
Said Marco as he went inside.
Polo was returned with such pride.
A guy comes to rob a place.
The ski mask is covering his face.
But it wasn't on great.
So takes it off, redoes it, camera takes the bait.
And the best one of all.
This guy tried to rob a family's hall.
But a big epic fail took seed.
Police were already inside taking statements about another deed.
Doesn't it make you feel grand that these idiots are caught with little fuss across the land? That last guy should have at least looked into the window or maybe notice the cars with sirens that can glow. So ends this dumb criminal pass. You humans truly don't impress my little rhyming ass.
Enjoy your winter, smash a printer.