What would happen if a shit-sicle fell from the sky? Well for Pat, life changes and a colorful cast of characters surround him as he continues to strive to do nothing. I mean write, but that is doing nothing. From hairless armpits to what would happen if water and clumping kitty litter was thrown on a pervs dick all come into play. Did I mention there is a mystery at play?
All of the above and so much more as 25 episodes of Imagine That are released today at our shore!
Warning The Following May Offend Some Humans. Human Discretion Is Advised.
Warning The Following May Offend Some Humans. Human Discretion Is Advised.
Pat is on his way to work when a traffic jam slows things down. He spots two humans arguing and gets out of the car. His best, or worst, mistake ever. Life is totally changed upon meeting Crazy Eye, The Ex Mountie and other colorful characters. By the end of the day Pat will know shit truly happens.
Pat is shocked by Crazy Eye and now can't shut up. He has to explain everything in detail. Pat also can't remember the night before. To make matters worse The American has moved into his building and The Researcher reveals they made a deal when he was drunk. A deal that could be nine months in the making.
Pat is just learning to deal with Crazy Eye owning his apartment building, The American living above him and The Researcher becoming a part of his life, when The Repeater moves in next door. She can't sing and he can't shut her up. Will his bet with The American do the trick?
Pat and The Researcher have their first date. Things don't go as planned when they suspect the waiter of wanting to go postal on the place. Meanwhile The American and Crazy Eye are determined to save the day.
Pat has to go to the dentist twice in one day. Dr. Fluoride won't take no for an answer when it comes to his fluoride. The more Pat protests the angrier he gets. But could Dr. Fluoride be holding onto a secret that Pat will expose?
Crazy Eye hires building contractors to renovate Pat and The Researcher's apartment. Pat is not impressed with Large Arms and Handy Stripper upon seeing them. He soon find out his assumption was right and by the end of the day he'll have to burn his bed.
Pat takes The Researcher home to meet the family. Profanity Granny does not think much of him keeping her secret. Pat and The Researcher have to deal with plenty while The American learns he truly has a gift, which gets him dubbed, The Baby Maker.
After losing their instructor Pat gets roped into teaching yoga to a class of pregnant women. The American and Crazy Eye enjoy the show from afar and not so far as Pat fakes his way through it. Everyone soon learns why you never do yoga in public.
Crazy Eye gets his very own photo shoot where he is forced to dress like a pirate and cover his crazy eye. The Researcher has trouble at the grocery store. Pat ends up making two drunks think he is a figment of their imagination. And The American has a run in with Dr. Doitall while trying to buy a gun.
Pat, The Researcher, Crazy Eye and The American all get locked in an electronics store. There is only one huge TV left and Crazy Eye wants it. TV Guy won't let it go. The tensions rise as they all remain stuck and pissy toilet water even comes into play.
The American and Pat become lifeguards at Sports Plaza. After a bet with Crazy Eye, The American is hell bent on getting laid. Pat is surprised to see The Researcher and The American has his first meeting with Rule Nazi. Hairless armpits and pimple filled backs are also in play.
Large Arms comes back with an army of bible thumpers declaring Pat the devil. Actual thumping takes place within the walls of the apartment building driving everyone nuts. The American takes up his first day of working for free.
Pat finally has a plan ready to break into Future Presents and find out what is going on in there. Upon breaking in he finds The Researcher being kidnapped. After a well meaning attempt both are thrown in back a van. Together with The American and Crazy Eye they have to trample through the Canadian wilderness with the kidnappers hot on their trail.
Pat, The Researcher, Crazy Eye and The American are trying to stay one step ahead of everyone. The kidnappers are still after them, a pair of hillbillies both named Banjo want them dead and Mexican drug runners are also in play. It shapes up to be a stand off like no other as they keep their pellet guns at the ready.
Pat is told by everyone that a big storm is coming. He and The Researcher go to Costco to stalk up and things don't go as planned. Crazy Eye tightens up things at the apartment building. While Rule Nazi experiments with making The American more docile, handcuffs are involved.
A gene scanner has been stolen at the Future Presents Christmas party and now no one can leave. Pat picks out the culprit by using his that guy theory. But Crazy Eye gets the blame. At first no one believes him but as the night drags on and Screw Up starts acting peculiar, Pat's theory may be dead on.
Crazy Eye found a new tenant and she loves birds. Pat finds that out when her escaped crow smashes into his window. But not only does Bird Lady love her birds, she also loves Crazy Eye and they are getting married right away. Both The Researcher and Pat know something is fishy while The American is too consumed with Rule Nazi to notice.
Pat drops a check that Crazy Eye had given him for saving his life. Vegan Lady is the one to find it. She pretends she did not see the amount and then things get frisky. Pat's meat also gets thrown out. After such advances Pat has no choice but to call in The Researcher for back up.
The Researcher has a seminar to attend and Pat gets dragged along with her. Crazy Eye and The American are already seated when they arrive. Nose Hair begins his presentation and Pat finds him the most stupid guru ever. He, The Researcher and Crazy Eye soon learn why.
The Researcher gets promoted for all her hard work. At first she thinks it is a great idea, but between dealing with whiny employees, The Director and The General's advances, and not being able to work on her research into curing stupid, she soon learns the promotion was not a good idea.
Crazy Eye accepts a con man as a tenant only to try and pull a con on him. Pat doesn't think Crazy Eye has it in him, but with a little help from The Researcher, Crazy Eye thinks he can pull it off.
Pat takes The American to Dr. Tryitall to see about his back pimples. After a day of treatment The American starts to notice changes. Something is happening. The Researcher and Crazy Eye are their for the grand finale. Upon his actual diagnosis The American becomes a YouTube star.
Pat takes The Researcher gambling for the first time while they wait to see a kiddie band. Pat is less than thrilled but Crazy Eye and The Researcher seem to have something planned. The American tries to get his own groupies while Profanity Granny shows up to let Pat know what a little shit he is.
After one car was stripped and another thrown away due to The American's pollution, Pat finally decides to break down and buy a car. Pat, being cheap, goes to a less than reputable car lot. The four soon learn that Big Dick and Perky Seller are not what they seem.
Pat finally corners Crazy Eye and tries to force information out of him on how he knows the things he does. But before Pat could save him Crazy Eye is kidnapped and taken to Future Presents. Now it is up to Pat and The American to save him and maybe The Researcher as well.
And finally that big project is done. At least season one. Took a few months to get 25 episodes to come due. But it was fun through and through. Some stuff in there about Pat as well. He sure wasn't afraid to tell. Or maybe that was me as it was all written by the cat at our sea. Supposedly anyway. So what do you think at my bay? Ready for 25 episodes to come due? Think that is more than a few? Yep, they are actual episodes of stuff. Sometimes hillbillies pop out and get rough. The Banjos are mean. They make quite the scene. 200,000+ words and 25 books have now come to pass. I think I am going to go rest my little rhyming ass.
Experience spring, have a fling.