Monday, August 17, 2015

Blue Balls And Cat Calls!

The cat has to go after the Blue Guy once more. It is just a necessity at my shore. When the cat was lurking at his place the other day, I saw a display. Hmmm, this may be a bit more than PG. If you were to go gutter at your sea.


 Do your balls hang low?
Do they bounce as you go?
Do they wiggle with a turn?
Do they get a sun burn?

Do they speak to you?
Do answers come through?
Do they get a new view?
Are your balls oh so blue?

 Blue as the sea.
Blue as a Kree.
Blue as a balloon,
Or a smurf cartoon?

Are your balls blue?
Have they forsaken you?
Do they have a clue?
Are your balls oh so blue?

 Do your balls hang high?
Do they constantly die?
Do they hide with a wink?
Do they constantly blink?

Do they come as a set?
Do they fear a furry pet?
Do they stick like glue?
Are your balls oh so blue?

Blue as a copper.
Blue as a cake topper.
Blue as a pen.
Blue as other men.

Are your balls blue?
Have you looked a time or two,
To see if it is true?
Are your balls oh so blue?

Do your balls hang in the middle?
Do they fall when you fiddle? 
Do they break with a diddle?
Do they remind you of a riddle?

Do they hide when you mingle,
Or hear the sound of a jingle?
Do they spread hope anew?
Are your balls oh so blue?


Pfffft, what did you think the cat was talking about? Wait, don't answer that with a shout. The blue guy was just getting all ready for the Christmas season. He wanted to know whether your balls are blue for some reason. Noooo, this was not made up by the cat. I would never do that. Hmmm, maybe it has come to pass. I will never tell with my little rhyming ass.

Fill your rummer, get drunk all summer.

191 comments:

  1. Replies
    1. Oh my, there are blue balls at your show hanging low
      When you gotta go, you gotta go
      Now, who said that as you pat that 'rocket man'
      Doing the 'Bora Bora' the best he can?
      Size matters - didn't you know?
      Love that Bora burn like a good beau
      Hey, I'm on my break, not breaking any balls
      How are yours at the snip snip halls?
      They killed a smurf in that Pixel flick
      You can tell it wasn't a chick
      And I know for sure it wasn't me
      In the place to be
      Hello Snip Snip Kitty Cat
      Dreaming of balls at your Snip Snip Mat?
      A X-mas tree is not complete
      Without the bluest balls of all at your feet
      Wait, delete delete
      I didn't say that at my shore
      But I'm sure you want to hear some more
      When they come, they are a set
      Scooby Doowee... you bet
      I'm talking X-mas decoration
      Not the ones you dream of at your station
      Big and blue
      Like my missing blue suede shoe
      That you stole from me
      At my sea
      Could it be
      That maybe... you like all things blue
      Furry Blue, Kitty Blue - could it be true?

      Delete
    2. From coast to coast!
      Have some toast
      Not a fox
      In a box

      Delete
    3. Look at you go
      With the christmas flow
      I'll pretend that was it
      Every blue bit
      Whether coming as a pair
      Or standing on a stair
      The cat has his on a vets wall
      They took them all
      Such a snip snip
      With that trip

      With a goat
      In a boat

      Delete
    4. Or a cock
      In a sock

      A bird
      Don't be absurd lol

      Delete
  2. "Do they fall when you fiddle?"
    I'm hoping that they stay
    'Cause Blue's blue balls
    Need to greet another day

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. lol a meet and greet
      To their own beat

      Delete
    2. I'm hoping the same thing
      As they swing

      Delete
    3. A good hope indeed
      At your feed

      Delete
    4. Keeping my fingers crossed
      As the blue balls get tossed

      Delete
    5. Crossed fingers beat other things
      Can still have flings

      Delete
  3. Well he is a blue guy
    he said he had blue balls
    there at this hall...

    hmm I don't think they are the kind you throw against the wall
    and the cat just had to tell all....I think this is a bit more than PG
    hope Blue doesn't get mad at thee...haha...he will probably laugh
    as the cat passes his rhyming gas...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. haha Blue is already grumpy at his sea
      So can't go grumpier on me
      Hey, it was just christmas cheer
      From my rhyming rear

      Delete
    2. Did I say that
      On my mat?
      Do you mean the thing I said over HERE
      Making the Kitty Cat cheer?

      Delete
    3. A little cheer
      Works for my rhyming rear

      Delete
    4. haha - Blue that is where you said it..Are you ready for blueballs..and something about not touching them as well, oh wait that was blueberries..haha..better hope no one wants to play kick ball as then you might want to play dodge ball..just sayin'...haha..
      ok, I'll take my gutter self out of here..I guess I am in one of my moods..

      Delete
    5. This comment has been removed by the author.

      Delete
    6. Kick ball would be far worse
      That would make be curse

      Delete
    7. Kick ball
      Not at my hall
      Making me fall
      And call
      Y'all

      Delete
    8. You'd call more than that
      If kick where those balls are at

      Delete
  4. This is hilarious! I'm quite sure the only blue balls in my house are hangin' on my teenage boys 'cause I'm a purist when it comes to my Christmas tree. Only red, green, silver and gold hang on that beauty.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. No blue on the tree?
      What about pornaments at your sea?

      Delete
  5. Sorry, no blue balls of any kind at my pad.

    ReplyDelete
  6. I always enjoy the BIG blue balls people hang on their trees outdoors at Xmas!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. See, there you go
      Nothing wrong with a blue ball show

      Delete
  7. I got a female Chihuahua/Jack Russell mix and she has balls that can't be removed.

    Oh, I always liked blue balls on a white Christmas tree. When you go out for an unnatural look, go for it.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Oh yeah, that is weird
      They can look good at the time of season with the dude with the beard

      Delete
  8. Replies
    1. No blue christmas balls
      Not even to hang on walls? lol

      Delete
    2. She must be stuck on easter
      And just an egg feaster?

      Delete
  9. Cat is a rascal, what can you say
    He's always leading the humans astray
    Blue balls on a tree will be lovely of course
    Blue snow to be shoveled, there'll be no remorse

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. haha the cat leads down the dirty mind way
      Never know what you'll find at my bay

      Delete
    2. A rascal he is
      It's called Kitty Cat show bizzzz
      A dirty mind and snip snip too
      Scooby Doo!

      Delete
    3. Snip snip all the way
      So no balls on display

      Delete
    4. I'll send you a pair
      With or without furry hair?

      Delete
    5. They may rot
      Or turn pok a dot

      Delete
    6. I'll put them on ice
      Stuff them with rice

      Delete
    7. Might tingle
      As the ice and rice mingle

      Delete
  10. Oh my, cat!!!! Blues rebutted is sure to be just as sneaky. Talking about blue balls. ..good thing mushy isn't here to see this. I'll stick with your whole smurf idea lol lol

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. lol see, just stick with the smurf
      It is a smooth rhyming surf

      Delete
    2. He keeps talking about all things blue
      First he stole my shoe
      Now he wants blue balls too haaaa!

      Delete
    3. Blue is the color of the day
      Here at my bay

      Delete
    4. Well, that's just great!
      Gotta go now - I'm late

      Delete
    5. Don't be late
      Fired may be a bad fate

      Delete
    6. Don't say the F-word
      It may be heard

      Delete
    7. Will keep it at bay
      With the F say

      Delete
  11. LMAO well you can imagine where my mind went! Great way to start my day. I felt myself singing to this in a sing song fashion as I read. LOL Loved this one! :) ♥

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. lol might scare some away
      If I made this a youtube video at my bay

      Delete
  12. This might be PG but my mind is not! I will be laughing all day about this!!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. haha a dirty mind is just fun
      Should be had by everyone

      Delete
  13. No blue balls here I'm afraid. Have a good week.

    ReplyDelete
  14. "Blue Balls And Cat Calls!"
    It is just a novelty that is all
    With hues of colors
    Makes one wonder
    Is it true pride before a fall

    Hank

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Pride can be a ride
      Falling with the tide

      Delete
    2. How come the Cat's voice is so high
      Making him cry?
      Could it be that X-mas makes him, you know, remember
      Something that happened way back in September? :p

      Delete
    3. What something could that be
      There at my sea

      Delete
  15. Have to admit my mind was in the gutter
    and I was thinking of some other type of ball
    Glad that you cleared it up at the end
    and it was only Christmas ornaments after all

    betty

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. haha had to make it clear
      So no gutter stayed near

      Delete
  16. Let me just consult my wife first. She carries mine in her purse...

    ReplyDelete
  17. No gutter for me
    My mind is G
    All my Christmas balls are blue
    Most covered with snowflakes, too
    But oh how annoying to see
    A store decked as full as can be
    With tons of Christmas balls
    Before the autumn calls

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yeah that it is
      As they try to up their biz
      Capitalizing on it
      Selling tons of umm shit

      Delete
  18. Too late to make that about the Christmas tree. Only a mind in the gutter could lead so many others right down there with you.
    Susan Says

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. haha my mind goes there
      Plenty at my lair

      Delete
  19. Yup, the mind could wander to the gutter but blue balls would be nice for Christmas. Too funny.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. They can bring christmas cheer
      Not so much with anything else I fear

      Delete
  20. The cat lead us down the gutter path and then tried to pull back. The breaks are shot by that point.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. The brakes were shot
      With my blue ball plot?

      Delete
    2. He always tries to pull back
      When he's playing the dirty track

      Delete
    3. I pull back well
      After raising a little hell

      Delete
    4. omg - sometimes it is hard to break...haha..ok, I am going now...where's the soap...

      Delete
    5. Down in the gutter
      Sure can make some stutter

      Delete
  21. I was cracking up while reading this. Bahaha! I guess I have a dirty mind. ;)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. haha nothing wrong with that
      Works for the cat

      Delete
  22. I was cracking up while reading this. Bahaha! I guess I have a dirty mind. ;)

    ReplyDelete
  23. Great way to start the day. Thanks for visiting IWSG, Pat. And thanks for the chuckles.

    ReplyDelete
  24. It's going to take a while to get my mind out of the gutter after that one!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. lol you'll get it out
      As long as no blue balls are seen about

      Delete
    2. Tell little old me?
      How mean of she

      Delete
    3. Young you say
      Don't feel it at my bay lol

      Delete
  25. LOL, you are hilarious Pat. Nice Monday morning wake-up.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. A wake up call like no other one
      With my rhyming run

      Delete
  26. I giggled like a five year old. Goddamnit.

    I am an adult.
    I am an adult.
    I am an adult.
    I am an adult.

    ...hehehehe

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. haha bah a five year old self is good
      Now and then at ones hood

      Delete
    2. Never too late?
      Tell that to your birth date

      Delete
    3. Switch it around
      Is a better number found

      Delete
    4. Then I'd be 54!
      A bit too old at my door

      Delete
    5. Damn, need to wait for the big 5 0
      Then back to 5 you go

      Delete
  27. For a minute there neutered came to mind!

    ReplyDelete
  28. LOL Cat! Oh the stories we heard about the dangers of blue balls ~ They had us keeled over laughing in residence as freshettes!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. haha the cat gave another to the lore
      With a little bit more

      Delete
    2. Yeah ~ I'll be a little indelicate here: It's a difficult problem guys supposedly developed that was bad for them ~ If their girlfriends didn't put out for them! We girls in residence thought that was hysterically funny ~ didn't buy it at all! It still makes me laugh.

      Delete
    3. hahaha I knew one guy who got them in university here
      He went and drank a lot of beer

      Delete
    4. Fun to laugh at it
      As long as it doesn't take a hit

      Delete
    5. A little indelicate is fun
      Like touching a blue bun ;)

      Delete
    6. So you say
      I'll let that stay

      Delete
  29. Funny!!!!
    Actually, I enjoy the color blue during the holidays. Blue balls galore at my shore!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Blue can sure shine
      Works for the feline

      Delete
  30. Not Christmas!!!!!! Anything, even the OTHER blue balls, is preferable to Christmas ornaments. Do you want to drive me mad?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. haha no Christmas yet at your sea?
      Almost four months to go until all get cheery

      Delete
  31. orlin N cassie...frank lee.... uz boyz thinked....well...ewe noe......for dai$y's sake we iz glad thiz post terned ta Christmas.....& knot......well....ewe noe ~

    ☺☺☺

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. haha a good turn of events indeed
      Save all the horror at my feed

      Delete
  32. Don't be blue...


    wait for it...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Waiting...waiting
      A slow rating

      Delete
    2. Wait for it?
      A long time or just a bit?

      Delete
    3. Still waiting
      Waiting brings hating

      Delete
  33. Whew. Christmas tree ornaments. grin.

    ReplyDelete
  34. My Christmas tree has mostly angels and horses.
    Nothing like this tree.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Nothing at all
      Suppose that's good at your hall

      Delete
  35. Nope...they're silver. "Silver balls, silver balls, it's Christmas time in the city..."

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Silver works too
      As the song comes through and through

      Delete
  36. Hmmm, I am trying to decide if this post
    is PG-13 or R! Blue balls? Well???

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. lol could go either way
      Such as my bay

      Delete
    2. R
      As the Kitty Cat went too far
      R plus one
      Because it was fun
      R plus 2
      Scooby Doo!

      Delete
    3. R works for me
      Too far? pffft no such thing at my sea

      Delete
  37. Everything else in my pad is blue, why not add blue balls, too.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. lol may perk things up
      And make a happy pup

      Delete
  38. Nothing beats a serving of schweddy balls.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. SNL gave birth to that
      At least that's the knowledge of the cat

      Delete
  39. My Christmas tree has ornaments from my grown kids, cardinals and red ornaments...fewer and fewer every year.

    ReplyDelete
  40. I do have blue balls on my Christmas tree! And lights too :) I started the tradition way before meeting Blue, but I am sure he'll try to take the credit for the idea.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. haha yeah, he'll try to take it all
      Greedy like that at his hall

      Delete
    2. Way before meeting me?
      In the place to be?
      Blue balls are great
      And it's never too late
      I'm talking X-mas now
      Not a fox in a box or a cow

      Delete
    3. Sure you are
      Protesting too much at your sand bar?

      Delete
  41. Look at Theresa getting saucy again. lolol

    The picture is funny. Though Blue may not agree...Rumor has it blue balls are not the way to be.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. haha not the way at all
      So i hear at my hall

      Delete
  42. I don't have blue balls, but my boobs hand low,
    And they wobble to and fro
    I can tie them in a knot.
    I can tie them in a bow.
    I can throw them over my shoulder
    Like a continental soldier,
    Yep, my boobs hang low.
    And now I'll be singing that tune for the next few days.
    Thanks to you and your crazy ways!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. PS First line should read "my boobs hang low." My mind was elsewhere (in the gutter, of course).

      Delete
    2. lol hand you say
      Oh my at your bay
      They have a song on youtube like that
      Can listen to it at your boobs hang low mat

      Delete
  43. Balls of blue? Like in a game?
    Or the ones that have another name?
    Oh, that can't be - I'll keep it clean.
    Cherdo doesn't do obscene.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. haha riiiight
      I believe that never at my site

      Delete
  44. Thanks for the morning giggle! No blue balls here. In fact, no tree here. My flat is smaller than a shoe box so during the holidays I have to wander by shop windows to see trees.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. haha yeah I have none at my sea
      The cats would break everything for free

      Delete
  45. Were you thinking of Lenny Kravitz,
    where his pants split and we saw his naughty bits?
    That was quite the sight to see
    but I prefer the balls to hang from my Christmas tree.
    I also have some land to give for free:)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. haha this was written way before that
      And blah to it says the cat lol

      Delete
  46. Omy!! Grumpy Blue always is talking about his blue balls hahaha
    I love the Christmas tree lol

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. lol that his is
      With the blue biz

      Delete
    2. Me? No I'm not, Gloria Dear
      The Cat just likes blue balls, I fear

      Delete
    3. haha liar liar
      Balls on fire?

      Delete
  47. Jingle Balls, jingle balls, jingle all the way

    ReplyDelete