Wednesday, August 26, 2015

What You Need At Your Feed!

So the cat is gonna rip off Halloween Nazi at his bay. I already did Christmas with the Blue Guy's blue balls on display, so let's do Halloween too. The Halloween Nazi is here to help you.


 If you want to scare,
And not do it by being bare,
Then listen to my tips.
Read my Halloween Nazi lips.

Grow out your hair.
Face can't be bare.
Let it grow everywhere.
A Sasquatch with flair.

Hammer bolts in your neck.
Peripheral vision you may wreck.
But don't worry about that.
You'll sure scare a cat.

Sit in water all day.
Shrivel up at your bay.
Look like a saggy skinned fish man.
All will run and really be a fan.

Grow out your teeth. 
Show what lies beneath.
Give a little suck.
You may be in luck.

Get a plastic mask.
It will fit the task.
Add a fancy hat,
And you'll be all of that.

Don't forget to use your finger,
Let that thing out to linger.
Place it on your chin.
More evil points you will win.

Teeth brushing is a no no.
They have to be yellow when they show.
Or rotten to the core.
Gross doesn't bore.

Get some fancy glasses too.
Then you can take them off and yell, boo!
With your creepy, lazy eye.
Even better if the eye did die.

And finally scratch up your face.
Aliens will see it from outer space.
It will look that bad.
Then a fun Halloween will be had.

Wow, Halloween Nazi is as violent as can be. She really takes Halloween seriously. Maybe someone should get her a happy pill. Blood and gore shouldn't thrill. But at least with her tips you'll get lots of candy as you'll scare away any kid that is handy. Not sure I'd follow her advice though class. You may want to trust my little rhyming ass.

Fill your rummer, get drunk all summer.

74 comments:

  1. Replies
    1. Blue wasn't here
      So it you, my dear ;)

      Delete
    2. Blue was out
      Suza had the clout

      Delete
    3. Plus it's hard to type when you're on the road
      Like... a big blue toad

      Delete
    4. Are you really on the road though?
      The car is on the road as you go

      Delete
  2. Replies
    1. Such fun!
      Five grand kids too
      That's five more than Grumpy Goo

      Delete
    2. So close today
      But seconds away

      Delete
    3. Thanks Blue and Pat
      Some days are bad!

      Hank

      Delete
    4. Seconds too late
      Some days not up to the plate

      Delete
    5. Seconds are all you need
      At the Kitty Cat feed

      Delete
  3. Covering all the holidays
    There at your sea
    Kinds gross and ghoulish
    From the Hallowe'en Nazi

    ReplyDelete
  4. Gotta brush my teeth now!
    You know, I'm sure Halloween really confuses aliens...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yeah, they look at us with disgust
      No wonder there is no trust

      Delete
  5. Hmmm....the Blue Guy's blue balls on display
    But I always brush my teeth before I play
    Scratch up your face.... maybe when it start to itch
    Might get myself a brand new stitch

    Hello Cat, I'm on the road
    Like a blue ball toad

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hopefully nothing gets that itchy
      Or ends up being super twitchy

      Delete
    2. Keeping my fingers crossed and my toes too
      And I'll raise you a Scooby Doo!

      Delete
    3. Cross away
      As twitchy sucks a ton every day

      Delete
  6. Halloween has hit the stores.
    Seems early, but kids want more!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. That they do
      Soon christmas will be in view

      Delete
  7. If you want fun on Halloween
    Where only strange things will be seen
    Put your two lips together and whistle
    Things happen faster than dawn on a thistle
    Spooky teeth that glow in the night
    Don't whine, you asked for the fright
    Is it for jest or is it for real
    Won't matter, Halloween has it's appeal

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You asked and received it
      So can't hiss and spit
      Is it better to give or receive though?
      The cat can grab some tp and throw

      Delete
  8. Faces that are hairy
    Are not what I find scary.
    Scarier, far, to me
    Are people who look like frogs at my sea.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Frog faces can be funny
      Beats teeth like a bunny

      Delete
  9. Can't believe Halloween is around the bend
    this year will soon end
    I did read an article about an interesting costume for Halloween
    It involves someone recently who did a bit of changing

    betty

    ReplyDelete
  10. I always liked halloween

    free candy as a kid

    and women on halloween serve as eye-candy as an adult

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. haha that is true
      There are many that aren't bad to view

      Delete
  11. So many options from you
    I'm not sure what to do
    Maybe I'll be Trump and scare them all
    I'd eat all my treats and have a ball.

    Thanks so much for adding my book to your nook!
    I'm honored, as I keep taking a look.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Trump would scare anyone to death
      Leaving them out of breath
      bring on the end of days
      Killing all as they gaze

      Delete
  12. Halloween,
    You make me scream
    with your scary suggestions
    that raise many questions!

    Seven months ahead!
    That's quite a spread!
    As for me it's seven posts;
    I have no boasts!

    I'll try to post my comment on the right day.
    Unlike yesterday! Have a good one at your bay!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. haha a little off
      No need to scoff
      Seven months keeps me going
      With a daily rhyming showing
      Takes a while to build up
      But works for any old hiccup

      Delete
  13. I burst out laughing thinking of someone sitting in a bath full of water so they can prune and scare people. At least you got unique ideas, cat!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. haha sit there all day
      And you'd be a scary display
      The cat goes out there
      With ideas to spare

      Delete
  14. I bet she's scheming decorations as we speak...type. :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. haha bet she is
      With her halloween nazi biz

      Delete
  15. So don't take care of hygiene and you're good to go?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. That is the trick
      Can work some slick

      Delete
  16. Mork and Mindy costumes I think I'll stick with
    Better than lord of the dark sith

    ReplyDelete
  17. Some people are just naturally scary!

    ReplyDelete
  18. Replies
    1. No matter what you say
      Even when the real scaries come to play? lol

      Delete
  19. That's some scary stuff at your bay, today. The growing out your teeth and not brushing them make me want to vomit!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. haha it would be as nasty as can be
      But work good for the day at your sea

      Delete
  20. I love Halloween, but not so much the gore.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yeah, that is overboard
      With the crap that is stored

      Delete
  21. Listen, I become terrified when my hubby asks me to pull his finger

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. lol nose gets scared
      As the finger is paired

      Delete
  22. Halloweens not so far away.
    Ghosts, goblins, and freaks will be out that day.
    I'll stay home.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Lock the door and hide
      With they come out for a candy ride

      Delete
  23. I love Halloween and love to dress up, but I don't think I'll be following any of the Cat's tips. lol

    ReplyDelete
  24. Scary times are just around the corner.....along with candy:)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Candy they like
      A sugar high shall spike

      Delete
  25. I love Halloween...but I'll skip the costume, especially if it means growing facial hair or growing out my teeth!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. haha but it may catch on
      And a new style could dawn

      Delete
  26. Honored you decided to spoof me today ;) You know, I actually started my Halloween shopping last Sunday. I had the manager at Walgreen's pull out all their Halloween stuff from the back so I could have first pick. I am staring to think I have a problem.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. That you surely just might
      But there are worse problems that could take flight

      Delete
  27. Halloween is on the mind?
    But we haven't yet left summer behind!

    ReplyDelete
  28. I love Halloween!
    You post was sweet
    great masks, very neat
    did you know zombies eat meat?
    Sorry, I've no idea where I was going!
    Happy Halloween!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. haha no idea can work
      Can lead to a fun perk

      Delete
  29. Halloween is too far away to consider
    too much time in between to twitter
    zombies on halloween make me bitter
    I'd rather clean up the cat's litter!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. haha guess there is one day
      Where you'll go cat at your bay

      Delete
  30. I think I will be alone this year for Halloween. I think the Hubs will be in Las Vegas.

    ReplyDelete