Monday, August 8, 2016

A Farmer Type Of Charmer?

So the cat will go after the ninja wannabe today. What is the opposite of a ninja at play? Farmer seems about right. They aren't too stealthy day or night. So a What Off Farmer Wannabe. That would be a site to see.

Corn Growing - Trapping Those Varmints - Growing Your Blog - A Good Dog - Cats In The Barn - Time of Blogging, And Farmer News!
(Wow, it looks like he still has huge ass titles for each post even while farming at his coast)

I turn the blog over to Corn Grower Jerry. He is going to explain why corn growing is scary.

Thanks Farmer Alex for the time. I will even give it to you in rhyme. Yes, corn growing is scary. It is harder than picking a berry. You want to know why? Those corn stalks can get really high. You never know what you will find in there. I've found everything from a bear to a hare. One day a serial killer may show up. I'll blind him with the moonshine in my cup. So watch the cornstalks when you go in there may be something in there to cause you sin.

Thank you for the thoughtful post Corn Grower Jerry and for proving corn growing isn't merry. Now I'm on to a new task. This I just have to ask. How do you stop those varmints from getting in? Do you think scarecrows are a good way to win? I'd like to know your thoughts as I dig some new farming plots.


Growing Your Blog

It has come to my attention that some bloggers need my growing expertise to get a following. Don't worry, no crops you will be swallowing. You just need to build a farm of your own. Get out there with your mower and find blogs that leave a comment at the tone. Then you'll grow a farm like me. Maybe even a potato or three.

A Good Dog

What's a good dog to keep the fox out of the hen house? I've got cats for each mouse. But a good dog is vital to scare those foxes away. I may have to invest in one at my bay. It will protect my hens and stay near the pens. Did you see that nasty fox? I'd beat it with my long john socks.

Cats In The Barn

Why is it there are always more cats in my barn when I go in? You'd think they would get crowded and give another farm a spin. But they always stay in my barn. They multiply like undone yarn. Do you think they are getting merry in there? Maybe my new dog will scare each pair.

Time of Blogging - I was asked my favorite time to blog. That one won't be a time hog. It is before the dawn. I have to then go out and milk the cows, sheer the sheep and mow the lawn.

Farmer News!

I just won the best pig in the county award. That has to strike a cord. Plus, got the most sheered sheep in the county. I made quite the bounty. I also cleaned the yard of cow shit the other day and filled the barn with hay. Oh, and I have a new fresh baked apple pie for one lucky winner today. All you have to do is send me your address and I'll mail it right away.

Do you have varmints running about? Are you up before the sun is out? Do you have cats in the barn? Did you enjoy my yarn? Do you blog at a good time? Do you know how to rhyme?

(hmmm, Farmer Wannabe may not be a sight to see.)

There you are. A new What Off explored at my bar. Do you want Farmer Alex or his Ninja one? The ninja may be more fun. But at least now you know. How any of you will get that apple pie is beyond my show. I guess you will have to go after him for it to come to pass. I'm so glad I'm not a farming little rhyming ass.

Fill your rummer, get drunk all summer.

81 comments:

  1. Replies
    1. Just sneaked in
      Without a din!

      Hank

      Delete
    2. Good morning True
      Feeling great here with you!

      Hank

      Delete
    3. Got in for the win
      Sneaky for a spin

      Delete
  2. Grerat post Pat. I would love more followers , the ones who are in my list don't always read my posts.
    Have a good week.
    Yvonne.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Some do, some don't
      Some will, some won't

      Delete
  3. A Farmer Type Of Charmer?
    Busy in spring and summer
    Had been up at dawn
    Since day was born
    Doing the same as a blogger

    Hank

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. That they may do
      As many are up early at their zoo

      Delete
  4. Lmao Growing a blog and a garden are nearly the same thing, right?1 I mean...unless it's a dairy farm. Nothing comes close to dairy!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Blah to dairy
      That is just scary
      But yeah, much the same
      Although no dirty hands with a blogging claim

      Delete
  5. That is hilarious! Yes, right down to my style of blogging and posting. Farming? Only if people want to eat grass. And the occasional dandelion.
    Thanks, Pat!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. haha copied the style away
      The cat and Cassie would eat the grass and dandelion display
      Not sure humans would though
      But you never know

      Delete
    2. Dandelions are tasty,
      Don't let them go to wastey!

      Delete
    3. Enjoy the taste
      Blah post haste

      Delete
  6. Hahaha this is awesome and will make farmers and Alex proud.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Farmers and ninja wannabes
      Both playing in the apple trees

      Delete
  7. This is too funny, I am still chuckling as I write. You have to watch out for those corn mazes one can get lost in there and then who knows an alien might come down and get thee.

    I think, I like the ninja image better, now I have an image of the Ninja in overalls playing his guitar on a hay barrel.

    Hey, he can do a commercial for "Got Milk" and make some dough then he would no longer need to hoe...ok, now I have to go.

    Crazy What off - Cat just crazy...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. lol hey, overall twang
      Could come in with a bang
      He could be a commercial hit
      Got milk as on hay he does sit
      Crazy as can be
      Always works for me

      Delete
  8. Hysterical post. We sure have cats in the barn, cats in the house, cats in the yard, cats in the trees, and cats in the bushes.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. haha you've got them all around
      A fine place for cats everywhere to be found

      Delete
  9. I'm glad my corn is in a box
    I wouldn't like to find a bear or a fox
    Fun and helpful hints from the ninja farmer
    Hopefully our days here won't get much warmer
    Or the boxes may wilt and produce no veggies
    I'll have buy all the food I please

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yeah, damn heat
      Sure isn't neat
      Lawns are all brown
      All through town
      Not much growing
      But hey, no mowing

      Delete
  10. So much can hide in corn stalks from snakes to nasty spiders. I have never been a farmer but often visited one in my youth and cats were always there. Now all we have is 5 at our bay...that's enough I have to say.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. 5 is sure enough indeed
      12 here now take seed
      And 2 mutts too
      Regular farm in view

      Delete
  11. Ninji's into corn
    New occupation born
    Play a tune bicracky
    He now digs cracker jacky
    Red long-johns to keep warm
    With trap-door is the norm
    A rifle by the door
    To even up a score

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. haha better watch the buck shot
      Could hurt a lot
      Or if it's real
      Be a deadly ordeal

      Delete
  12. Farming a blog . . Who knew? But yes, it certainly takes a lot of manure, either way!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. haha have to grow and grow
      Less stink usually though

      Delete
  13. Too cute with farmer Alex
    Certainly filled with variety
    And he is definitely keeping busy
    At his sea!

    Betty

    ReplyDelete
  14. Yes, cats being merry
    will bring the kitten fairy. hahahahaha....

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. haha that you sure know
      As kittens sure show

      Delete
  15. Start working before dawn is a good time to post but I really don't like getting up that early and cornfields are very scary.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. haha cornfield aren't your thing
      Yeah, screw getting up too early at ones wing

      Delete
  16. my mom worked hard to get off the farm and never looked back. Thank goodness - not in my genes or jeans do I till the earth, etc. I'd rather be a ninja with swords than plowshares.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. haha I very very much agree
      farming sure is not for me

      Delete
  17. I get up at the crack of dawn (oftentimes even before) but it's not to do farming, thank goodness. That's an admirable, but really rough job.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yeah, no way would I want to do that
      Waaaaaaay too much work for the cat

      Delete
  18. Farmers are the best! I say raise that hoe, plant that corn, chase that prize pig!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. haha watch the ninja wannabe go
      Would be quite the show

      Delete
  19. I don't have time anymore to visit other blogs to build a following like yours. So I guess I'm not much of a farmer anymore.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. lol no farmer habits at your sea
      Will make a sad ninja wannabe

      Delete
  20. I wouldn't want to farm...all those bugs in the dirt and on the plants. eww

    ReplyDelete
  21. I've wanted to go through a corn maze
    That would put me in a haze
    But now that I know I'd find creatures dead
    I'll stay in and eat cornbread instead.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. A much better way
      To enjoy the day
      Or maybe go another way
      And romp in the hay

      Delete
  22. Love this. Fun filled kiss. And for this while. Thank you for the smile

    ReplyDelete
  23. I've heard about farmer Alex and his crops!!!!!

    ReplyDelete
  24. I recognize that blog. Funny bit of satire.

    ReplyDelete
  25. Bloggers can farm. I mean, what's the harm? You might get to too "liked". Yikes!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Liked up the ying yang
      Out with a bang

      Delete
  26. orlin N cassie....catz in barnz go hand & hand ...ore iz that paw & paw....

    hmmmmmmm.........

    like

    well, cranbereez...

    now we loozed R trane oh thought ~~~~~~

    ☺☺☺♥♥♥

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. lol need some food
      Those burds being rude?

      Delete
  27. We had corn in our garden this year,
    Also cats in the barn that the rats do fear.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Got two tasks done
      With the farming fun

      Delete
  28. Dang, I really wanted that apple pie.

    ReplyDelete
  29. Farming and gardening take time. I am lazy to actually do that, but I mind it a bit when blog hopping. Hope you are enjoying summer Pat!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yeah, way too much work for me
      I'll stick to blogger for free

      Delete
  30. That was slightly psychedelic...
    Haven't picked up any potatoes yet, though.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Potatoes are blah anyway
      No picking them at my bay

      Delete
  31. Does he farm here in Indiana, because it seems that all we have as far as the eye can see is corn. I'm sure there are a few serial killers lurking about in them too. Or, just a few meth heads, since we are the meth capital of the country.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Damn, meth capital of the country you say
      Time to run far away

      Delete
  32. We can't live without farmers
    but not all of them are charmers!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Nope, not one bit
      As they remain covered in umm shit

      Delete
  33. Just popped over from the Ninja himself!
    Very clever, Pat!

    ReplyDelete
  34. I didn't know farmers and ninjas went together.

    ReplyDelete
  35. How funny! Farmers and ninjas, who would've thought?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Who knew
      As a farming ninja came due

      Delete
  36. Opposite of ninja? Nin-nein? Or of the German language would you decline?

    Crazy cool, cat.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Glad it was fun
      A decline may make him run

      Delete
  37. Farmers have
    A lot of manure
    But that's a bit better
    Than a nasty sewer

    ReplyDelete