Friday, August 5, 2016

What Off The Date To A New Fate!

Today's post would go into dating nuts but we are out of rip off ruts. Instead it is a What Off day. Robyn has come to play. What if she never had to use dating sites? You know, she was already doing things when she turned out the lights.

Snow remover for higher
Are you more costly to the buyer?
Newfie reno crew
Some backwards and upside down too?

Investment Opportunity Only 100,000$ Bucks
Somehow I don't trust you, shucks.
Toner-Save
Big-Shave

Unique Gits
Are the pits.
Contact for Top Comice Prices
Do they come with pizzae slices?

Deer Apples Beware
You're in for a scare.
We carry it all
Must have one big wall.

Funished and ready to go
I hope some TP is in tow.
Never to late
Does late have a gate?

Crave less with lasers
Does it come with phasers?
Enjoy life in my part of the wood
I hope that doesn't get misunderstood.

Counter tpps made easy.
Opposite tp sounds cheesy.
Why go anywhere else when you can have it here
Because you are too wordy I fear.

Movies of you
Spying at my zoo?
Water purifying made simply simple
Like a pimply pimple?

Seeking friends for stuff
My, stuff sounds tough.
Come and join our clan
No thanks, not an orgy fan.

Want some honey roast?
Nah, not something I'd host.
Two of anything for the price of one
Damn, so like a genie wishing run?

I guess she couldn't really avoid the innuendo here. She'd still have it near. Even when using a classified ad site for businesses and such. That wood no one may want to touch. My What Off classifieds have come to pass. They are almost as scary as the dating ones to my little rhyming ass.

Fill your rummer, get drunk all summer.

67 comments:

  1. Replies
    1. I stumbled into that today.
      Crave less with lasers? What do those lasers do?

      Delete
    2. Got on in
      For the win

      Hmm I didn't ask
      May be a scary task

      Delete
    3. A ninja attack it is
      Doing the ninja biz

      Delete
    4. Attacked for the win
      There at his bin

      Delete
  2. Enjoyed this Pat, there's no stopping you is there.
    Yvonne.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Robyn will absolutely love these crazy classified ads.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. They work for a smirk
      Few would be a perk

      Delete
  4. Did autocorrect give you a hard time with this post?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yep, it sure was all red
      As I put the post to bed

      Delete
  5. What off day has me a bit confused
    but, I am sure you will be amused
    as we try to figure out the what off

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. The what off is now times three
      You'll get it when we reach 30

      Delete
    2. I get a what off day
      I'll be sure to stop by your bay
      hopefully, nice the cat will play
      you never know what the cat will say

      Delete
    3. haha that you do
      We'll see what comes in view

      Delete
  6. Classifieds, come take your pick
    What it is that makes you tick
    Robyn likes to read the ads
    Maybe finding some neat lads

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Lads from the classified stuff
      May be a all fluff

      Delete
  7. Replies
    1. So true
      And I'll raise you a Scooby Doo

      Delete
    2. No goat on a boat
      There at your moat?

      Delete
  8. When trying to sell something
    One has to be clever with words
    But some of these
    Are very absurd.

    Betty

    ReplyDelete
  9. One day I am going to read your blog and find out you were married two years ago. Funny how some topics never die like buyer beware. lol

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. lol buyer beware stays on in
      It may be more of a year at my bin
      Only a year ahead
      With posts put to bed

      Delete
  10. Ah, dating. Nice to hear it's still a circus. lol

    ReplyDelete
  11. Robyn will laugh
    perhaps inside a choke
    ads can get winners or losers
    even with a bloke

    funny Friday

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. That they will
      Some ads need to chill

      Delete
  12. So who pays attention to ads nowadays, unless it is something you just can't do without. But some ads are fun to read or look at.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yeah, that is all I use them for
      To make fun at my shore

      Delete
  13. Very few ads would ever be seen by me
    If not for your monthly hilariotry

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. haha works out well
      As the cat rings the bell

      Delete
  14. Dating is hard with the crazies running loose.
    Hide from those ads, hide from those fads.

    ReplyDelete
  15. I keep getting viagra ads, but not on dating sites I hope!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. At least they'd be upfront
      About their umm stunt

      Delete
  16. There used to be a couple of ads that especially got to me and made me laugh. One was for "genuine faux pearls." I wonder how many people were fooled by THAT one? And then there was the ,"If not 100% satisfied, we'll send you another one absolutely free!" HA! If I don't like ONE, why the heck would I want a second???

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. lmao that is very very true
      Both at your zoo

      Delete
  17. Seeking friends for stuff...butt stuff is all I could think of!

    ReplyDelete
  18. orlin N cassie

    deer apples.... ???

    18 centz anda sack oh friez thiz iz frum de bass terd vizshuz deer that tried ts steel de food servizz gurlz car a few bak

    heerz two a zebra oto kinda week oh end ♥♥♥

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. haha you may have to track them down
      And drive them out of town

      Delete
  19. Robyn doesn't need classifieds, she's got poetry.

    We're talking about Robyn (chocolate lover), yes? :)

    ReplyDelete
  20. Dating and ads can both be tricky. ;)
    ~Jess

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. And rather icky
      One has to be picky

      Delete
  21. Deer Apples?
    You should have such luck.
    Deer Nuts?
    They're just under a buck.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Unless one's been fixed
      Then the whole thing is nixed

      Delete
  22. Deer Apples?
    You should have such luck.
    Deer Nuts?
    They're just under a buck.

    ReplyDelete
  23. I had to pause at deer apples.... ??? What's going on here? Pat, be a dear and make it clear!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. lol ads from a site
      As they tried to sell crap day and night

      Delete
  24. The classifieds just make my head spin and they are just often cheesy or downright scary

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Scary in every way
      As they come on display

      Delete
  25. I can't remember the last time I read a classified ad, though I've seen some pretty funny ones in my day.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yep, nuts they are
      Whether selling this that or a car

      Delete
  26. Good job on this. Thank you for sharing.

    ReplyDelete
  27. Wood? Like morning wood? LOL No, never that.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. lol could sell it
      The right person may find it a hit

      Delete
  28. I would really like a unique git
    better than a got any day!

    ReplyDelete
  29. Dating sites
    Can cause some gloom
    Most people there
    Need to leave the room

    ReplyDelete