Monday, May 1, 2017

A Little Percent Doesn't Make A Dent!

Percentages sure do and don't count. It all depends on the amount. The percentage I post is 100% of the time. Did any new a to z followers think I wouldn't drop a dime? But now on with it. Then end of my word percentage I'm about to hit.

Did that make sense?
Probably not one bit.
Seems some are just as dense,
Or like to make up shit.

Don't know about it?
Well now you will.
For it's okay if it's a bit.
Then you can get a thrill.

GLUTEN FREE!
Err ummm yep, sure is.
Free as can be,
As long as it is under the percentage of the biz,

TRANS FAT FREE!
Yeah, this one is sooooo true.
Whoops, the claim you may see,
But it's lying in your view.

A flip and a flop.
What of the reverse?
Surely there isn't such a crop?
Now hold in that curse.

EGYPTIAN COTTON SHEETS!
Yep, they are oh so great.
Whoops, turns out they are cheats.
Can say it as long as a tiny percent entwined is their fate.

1500 THREAD COUNT!
That is such a high sum.
Whoops, they doubled the amount.
Two sides to sheets as they play dumb.

KILLS 99.99% OF GERMS!
At least the ones known.
If in some new germs worms,
Whoops, lied at the tone.

We can say it is true.
Look it up if you will.
As long as it's in the stew,
Or below a certain bill.

Bah, screw all of that.
Who really needs to know?
Just follow where you're at,
And enjoy the percentage show.

Believe it all? Does it catch your eye at your hall? Do you buy because of such fancy claims? Pffft the cat won't fall for their games. Maybe I'll even make a dent in their little percent. Or just let them smell some gas that 100% of the time comes out my little rhyming ass.

Experience spring, have a fling.

50 comments:

  1. Replies
    1. late for the date
      by one minute
      and still made it!
      now 5 in a row
      but where did they go?

      Hank

      Delete
    2. Still on the go
      Even if a minute out at my show

      Delete
    3. Good morning True, Ma'am!

      Hank

      Delete
  2. Wondeerful to read as always Pat. can always rely on a smile.
    Have a good day.
    Yvonne.

    ReplyDelete
  3. A Little Percent Doesn't Make A Dent!
    Pushing their wares with all the rants
    Did we buy it?
    Not even a bit
    Big laugh it was looking at all the fun

    Hank

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Look and don't buy in
      Can sure be a win

      Delete
  4. Percentage matters when it comes to a high sum like buying a car or new home. Shop around for the best rate, owing is not a fun fate.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Owing sure does suck
      As interest rate can cost many a buck

      Delete
  5. If it says gluten free, I don't buy it. Can't wait for that craze to be over.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Not sure it will be
      Seems stuck at every sea

      Delete
  6. Seems like it's that .01 germ that always sneaks through doesn't it?:)
    You have a great one, Pat.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yep, that little germ always gets in
      Wanting to be the other 99.99% for the win

      Delete
  7. Remember the 4 out of 5 dentists recommend commercial? I still want to know what the 5th guy recommends!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yeah, who is the 5th guy
      The other 4 may lie

      Delete
  8. Why can't they makie it 100% without germs
    So close to it in their ads
    But still buy the product
    Its the best to be had

    Betty

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yeah, better than none
      To let the germs run

      Delete
  9. They mess around with all our food
    Puts us in a de-pressed mood
    A little of this, a little of that
    People now want zero fat

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Zero but still large
      As crap gets in by the barge

      Delete
  10. Remember the old ad in all the lands,
    Melt in your mouth, not in your hands?
    How many walls and doors show you
    With colorful little hand prints it just isn't true?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yeah, nice little prints
      Sure not window tints

      Delete
  11. I'll take note of percentage--
    Sometimes it's nice--
    But the greatest advantage
    For me is low price.

    Forget the food fads
    And the various scams.
    And I'm definitely bailing
    At gluten-free hams.

    Arlee Bird
    Tossing It Out

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Bailing on out
      Of the gluten free trout
      The old rubber shoe
      Just wouldn't do

      Delete
  12. I like the ones that read 50% more. More than what?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yeah, more than before
      But what was before at their shore lol

      Delete
  13. I'm 100% certain - it's all lies! LOL
    I too tired to care. But truth be told, I fall for it every time! There's one born every hour! ;)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Getting suckered in
      Can sure make ones head spin

      Delete
  14. I give this post a 50/50 chance of success

    ReplyDelete
  15. I wonder if I went to Bed, Bath and Beyond and showed them under a microscope that my 1500 Thread Count Egyptian Sheets only had 1497 threads if I could get a refund and an apology?

    Also, at the grocery store over the weekend I got some unpopped popcorn that was certified gluten free. I mean, I don't know why any unpopped popcorn kernels would ever have flour inside of them to begin with, but you never can tell in this day and age. It's good to be 100% sure.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You never know until you try
      Although counting them all may be hard on the eye

      Have to use that hook
      So people will look
      And have to guarantee
      That some plant worker's lunch never touched it and it is gluten free

      Delete
  16. That did make cents to me! Just don't get sheet faced!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Stay three sheets to the wind
      Don't get pinned

      Delete
  17. So many things
    They want us to try
    Each one just sings
    our money goodbye

    ReplyDelete
  18. Hahaha, this is a great one. Yep, reminds me of the white lies concept. Those labels can be frustrating.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Little or big
      Such white lies dance a jig

      Delete
  19. Replies
    1. Have to watch out
      As one is always about

      Delete
  20. It's amazing all of the claims on packages these days. Who knows what's true and what's not anymore :(

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yeah, all a load of crap
      As they peddle it across the map

      Delete
  21. I don't go for fat free
    That can fly up a tree.
    I don't have a certain disease
    So gluten free , oh please!
    4 out of 5 doctors say it's good.
    Who is that 5th doctor or is he made of wood?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Maybe he is a statue
      Looking right at you
      Has that evil glare
      Stating buyer beware

      Delete
  22. So cute!
    Have a nice week!
    Gil Zetbase

    ReplyDelete
  23. The only thing
    I know for sure
    Is I'm 100% right
    Would you concur?
    :-)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Can I 99% agree
      Would that work for thee?

      Delete