Tuesday, July 25, 2017

A Little Age Change Wage!

The cat hears humans say they don't change even if life were to rearrange. For some that may be true, as they whine in mommy's basement all the day through. But for others we shall see. Change sure comes, for better or worse, to thee.

Add a day.
Add a year.
Much will play.
Cheer or fear.

Each an add.
Each a loss.
Change is had,
Comes like moss.

Grows more cold.
Grows more happy.
Truth be told,
May get more yappy.

Less is more.
More is less.
Damn the chore,
Leave the mess.

More days behind.
Less days ahead.
Some mean, some kind,
Time has sped.

The less you care.
The more you do.
Either way you're aware,
What others think of you.

More grumpy, more bitter.
Less selfish, less about me.
Can sure take to Twitter,
Or just let it be.

A decision here.
A decision there.
Change is near,
Whether or not aware.

A little more of this.
A little less of that.
Could be bliss or hiss,
Or some extra fat.

Change shall grow.
Change shall come.
Unless, you know,
You just sit on your bum.

I suppose it will come then as well. For you may get wide as Hell. That is some sort of change, right? Change sure happens whether or not we want it to take flight. Age brings it along and we may sing a new song. May not always be a good one and could hurt the ears a ton. But I'll leave that to the singing bass. Now I have to get Pat to change the litter of my little rhyming ass.

Fill your rummer, get drunk all summer.

Monday, July 24, 2017

A How Dare Sympathy Stare!

So the other day the cat listened to a human have their say. More like rolled my eyes in dismay. Then they caught on to it. Ranting and having another fit. So came the rub along with a "see ya later, bub."

Were you listening to me?
I was talking to thee.
Don't roll your eyes.
Hear my whiny cries.

I'm in such bad shape.
May need duct tape.
It can keep anything together,
Even in the worst weather.

I'm in need of this.
It would sure give me bliss.
Why is it amiss?
Hear me hiss.

What am I to do?
Nothing will come through.
What was that?
Shut up, cat!

You know nothing at all.
That was a mean call.
Stay away from me.
I can't believe that came from thee.

Why would you say that?
You are such a mean cat.
That isn't how people act.
That is a simple fact.

You should be ashamed.
Your upbringing must be blamed.
That human is worse.
I hope you fall under a curse.

You have no clue.
Can't believe that came due.
I am now going away.
I am in such dismay.

I can't believe it was said.
I'll go cry in bed.
Are you happy now?
Don't you raise that eyebrow.

All right, I'm going.
My tears are growing.
You are so mean.
I'll go elsewhere and make a scene.

Any guess what the cat said to the whiny one as they went on their oh so whiny run? It was as simple as can be. You'd think I swore at them at my sea. All that was said was what popped in my head. "I have no sympathy for you because you do nothing to fix things at your zoo." Now I may not have rhymed it but you get what caused the fit. Ahhh the whiner class. They'll get no sympathy from my little rhyming ass.


Fill your rummer, get drunk all summer.

Sunday, July 23, 2017

A Rated Time With This Chime!

The cat did the whelmed bit. That was sure a hit. Good and whelmed some can be. Who needs the over and under at their sea? Here is another that never gets love. Not even when push comes to shove.

The path is gated.
Poor old rated.
Add at the tone.
Can't be alone.

Overrated it is.
Damn that biz.
Gets my hate.
Overrated out of the gate.

Underrated it is.
Here is a pop quiz.
For you need to get to know,
This underrated show.

What if neither is true?
Can rated come due?
You never hear it said.
Is rated better off dead?

X-rated gets play.
PG rated comes your way.
R rated joins in.
14+ is given a spin.

G even lends a hand.
NSFW joins the band.
But plain old rated?
Must really be hated.

The truth is true.
99% believe it at their zoo.
Never will all agree,
That's known by you and me.

But most from coast to coast,
Neither under or over they boast.
They just love what has come due.
Wouldn't that mean rated is in cue?

Was that a no?
Is rated your foe?
Why all the hate?
Can't rated ditch the over under mate?

It wants to be whelmed.
Not over or under helmed.
Just whelmed and rated,
With no need to be inflated.

The cat just made a case for rated. Ever think rated is ill fated? Rated sure gets the hate. It's never used without a mate. Unless asking what something is rated and then a new rated is gated.That must get on its nerves. Can a word have such swerves? Can't even get on nerves at one's sea. Even if one has them come to be. Rated just threw me into a whole other sass. I'll just stay a whelmed little rhyming ass.

Fill your rummer, get drunk all summer.

Saturday, July 22, 2017

Pick A Name Not So Tame!

The cat makes fun of humans as a whole. That is such an easy stroll. You make it far too easy for me. But I never meanly going after one person at my sea. That sure isn't the way of the whole. Many humans need a bash to the head with a lump of coal.

Her I don't like
Him I rather hate.
A fine way to strike,
But then you take the bait.

She's just a bitch.
I don't know her for real.
But oh what a witch.
I say it with zeal.

He's just an ass.
I'd hate his ugly face.
I just know he's crass.
I put him in his place.

Let's up the ante.
Can be so easy.
Go down the umm slanty?
Get even more breezy.

She's a bleep bleep bleep.
I know it to be true.
I read it at my keep.
The internet gave me a clue.

He's a bleeping bleep bleeper.
I heard it from a friend of a friend of a friend.
I never dug any deeper,
But him I'll still offend.

Oh, I'm not done.
Did you see that bleeping bleep?
I hate them a ton.
They are such a useless heap.

I don't agree with that.
I think it is wrong.
I hope you go splat.
I'm right all along.

Because I'm right I have the will,
The will to call you names.
Here, have your fill.
Bleep you, you bleeping bleep and your bleeping claims.

Can't be civil.
Can't sound wise.
Let brain cells shrivel,
As the mud slinging flies.

Pfffft all humans can do as they hide away at their zoo. Okay to dislike something and not agree. But yeah, let's just shout hate at every one of those bleeps from behind a computer screen at our sea. Don't you love haters? Toss them all in moon craters. That will suck the hot air out of them in mass. Such a thing sure wouldn't get any hate from my little rhyming ass.

Fill your rummer, get drunk all summer.

Friday, July 21, 2017

Try Your Best...Not That Pest!

It's been said a time or ten. All have heard it at their den. But is it ever really done when given a run? Some may say yes and then later no they may confess. They cat can prove it as there you sit.

Try your best.
Pass the test.
Don't be a pest.
Be best of the best.

Working or not.
Best is hot.
Hotter than hell.
Best not to dwell.

Relative at best.
Like a hit or miss fest.
Feast your eyes on that.
Whelmed where you're at?

Best get to it.
May cause a fit.
You're not trying your best.
Come, be a polite guest.

Oh, you were to those guys?
Now you tell lies?
Your best is better for them ones?
Don't tell the nuns.

Best is better at work,
For those with a perk.
Boss best kiss his ass.
Oh look, a pretty lass.

An awful great tipper,
Best beat a free double dipper.
They get more attention.
Maybe even a mention.

Best ways to teach,
High scores in reach.
An either or approach,
That some may broach.

The best across the land.
Isn't that grand?
Those with money get the care,
With much best to spare.

But really, I'm trying.
So quit your spying.
That just makes you a pest,
You'll get a whole different best.

So are you trying your best? Best with winner or pest? Different levels can be at play. Did you even realize that at your bay? Ease, money and what it does for me, can more often than not decide which best comes to be. The more of each and the more many's best seems to be in reach. The cat better now go best Cass. She best watch out for my little rhyming ass.

Fill your rummer, get drunk all summer.

Thursday, July 20, 2017

The Maybe Comes To Thee!

Are you in a maybe rut? That can be good at your hut. No, not the maybe way or answering crap. That can just prove you to be a sap. More like a maybe it could be there at your sea.

As you write away.
As you go out to play.
The maybe comes along,
Singing its cheery song.

Or it could be eerie,
Making one weary.
Either way, it's there.
Even if you aren't aware.

The tension grows,
As the maybe shows.
Could go this way or that.
Most kept under your hat.

But it's there.
Now you're aware.
I've said it twice.
Maybe I'm being nice?

Yeah, maybe not.
Free the brain rot.
See? Not nice here.
In case that wasn't clear.

Maybe you'll find nice?
Maybe you'll catch lice?
Maybe around the next bend,
You'll start a whole new trend?

Maybe you'll safe a life?
Maybe you'll find a wife?
Maybe sure has lore,
If you just open the door.

Maybe there's more.
Pffft to that encore.
A setting far far away,
For another long off day.

But maybe and seek,
Gives you a peek.
Maybe could arise,
Whether or not one is wise.

The maybe is there.
The maybe doesn't care.
It's a part of life's will,
Could be more or run of the mill.

Does the maybe make you think or drive you right to drink? A lot of actual maybes that can arise, maybe even right before your eyes. The tension in maybe is good too for a book or movie at ones zoo. But it is there in life and maybe sure can bring strife. The maybe if you did this or that pass sure can fly out like gas and rise up like many blades of grass. It can also be rough on the head if you aren't a crazy little rhyming ass.

Fill your rummer, get drunk all summer.

Wednesday, July 19, 2017

Furry Balls Upon The Walls!

Now that is a loaded title there. Some may sure stop and stare. But no need to go to the gutter. Although the cat will sit here and mutter. Cassie is greedy as can be. She tried to hog the whole cat tree.


Here we are sharing away.
Look at those shadows at play.
 They just dance about,
With a twist and shout.


Cassie spots something over there.
I must see if it is rare.
I jump down for a look.
 Then Cassie becomes a crook.


See where I have to sit? 
I blame her for it.
No, the cat is not fat.
We kinda, maybe, sorta broke that.


And here she goes.
Why? Who knows.
Hogging the middle,
As with a furry ball she does fiddle.


Now the middle and a perch.
 Should leave her in the lurch.
Whatever that means.
Hey, I've seen it on human screens.


And she's laughing at me.
 How dare she.
I will get her for that.
You can't beat the cat.


Two perches in one.
Time I ruin her fun.
She is just being a hog.
 Still not as bad as a dog.


Ready to whack me?
I don't think so at my sea.
I will get the tree,
As the furry ball flies free.


She tries the same trick.
She thinks she is slick.
I'm not looking this time. 
Even if it is a scary mime.


And so to Cass,
The tower hogging lass,
I don't give her sass,
Instead I just give her my ass.

Now she can't fool me. I won't see if she tries to let a lie fly free. I may just pass some gas on her head. That will cause her dread. Do furry balls give you such glee? Oh that is a loaded question from me. Maybe you can play with them with Cass? Just don't hog the tower of my little rhyming ass.

Fill your rummer, get drunk all summer.

Tuesday, July 18, 2017

Round Sixty Is Here In The Clear!

I think 60 may be the last. Seems searches are a thing of the past. Not a one by words have come on by in weeks. I guess Google stopped with the sneak and peeks.

walmart men's swimwear

Why bother with that? Already got cracks showing where you're at.

parkaing garage signs

Are they that great? Back to pay an hourly rate?

best rhymes ever

Damn, I'm clever to get found for that endeavor.

all seeing eye

The cat sees all. I'm just that tall.

tarsier

The bug eyed creep takes a leap.

Cat pees

I didn't yet. But I will and it's a safe bet.

mooning woman panties

Doesn't that defy the point? Not really a full moon at your joint.

homeward bound

This cat talks too. Who knew?

my thing is stuck

Stuck and thing? Don't need to know at our wing.

mega cats

That like a Pokemon thing? Can the cats sing?

boring boredom

Redundant there at your lair.

housing crisis at five

Not at six? Are you playing time zone tricks?

movies at my place

Depends what one. But we'd probably run.

blue shoe kangaroo

Almost right. One Shoe Kangaroo at our site.

And what could be the final winner at my sea sure when on a spree. A spree of something dumb. Don't you want them to be your chum?

Robbed Granny Panties Neighbor

Did they rob the neighbor of the granny panties or her stuff? Maybe they wanted to see granny in the buff? That visual may be bad. I'll stop now at my pad. Whoops, is it already in your head? Oh the dread. So there is the latest search engine pass as people now just use links to find my little rhyming ass.

Fill your rummer, get drunk all summer.

Monday, July 17, 2017

Here To Flip The Offending Trip!

We all know, even those who are rather slow, that humans gets offended by anything these days. The cat just thinks they are lost in some silly maze. One their brain doesn't want to get through. They'd rather be offended by you.

A simple task laid.
Stuck up to see.
No statement made.
Just the belief of thee.

No push on others.
No tirade or spiel.
No talk of mothers,
Like some 90's ordeal.

Just a simple notion.
A one and done.
Oops, a commotion.
Out to offend everyone.

It offends my belief.
It offends my sight.
It causes me grief.
I'll think about it all night.

This is my retort.
Take that, you.
You I'll report,
What I say is true.

I'm the one?
Me and not you?
Don't be a nun.
That isn't true.

My words are truth.
You offended me.
Here in my booth,
I'm king, you see.

Mine was a statement?
Yours was just a share?
Oh, go and get bent.
You put it out there.

That's offending to me.
Pushing your views like that.
What? I didn't have to come see?
There was no welcome mat?

I saw your hidden meaning.
Now I'm offended in every way.
You need a censor screening.
Truth is every word that I say.

Pffft to such nuts. They can go sniff dog butts. The only ones offending in such cases are the offendees. As they get offended by a breeze. Then what they say is oh so true. I think the cat telling them to pound sand up their ass may come due. Whoops, did I let that slip? Damn, I offended so many with that little blip. Notice how the offendees are usually the offenders? Maybe they need to get beaten up by The Defenders? The cat does enjoy offending such a low tier human class. For they can just suck on the gas that comes out my little rhyming ass.

Fill your rummer, get drunk all summer.

Sunday, July 16, 2017

Find A Groove To Always Improve?

Some humans say to always improve. On that point they never move. And would you believe in some cases that is a lie? I shocked you? Oh me, oh my.

Get in the groove,
To always improve.
Shake and move.
Easy to prove.

A better skill.
Fits the bill.
Practice each day.
Learn a new way.

Simple or hard.
Cm or a yard.
The change is great.
So improve, mate.

Improve your learning.
Improve your turning.
Improve your writing.
Improving is igniting.

Improve a spoon...
Don't be a loon.
That can't be done.
Damn, ended the fun.

Improve ass wipe...
Do you have a gripe?
Just take the leap.
Don't buy cheap.

Improve your plate...
Yep, a great idea mate.
Make it wash itself and cook the food.
Put everyone in a good mood.

Improve your shoe laces...
Yeah, love such embraces.
Tying different color improves it.
I better get on that shit.

Improve your cat...
Pffft, damn that.
We are God.
Bow down, human cod.

But can always improve.
I won't budge or move.
No matter what you say.
Improve with each day.

The cat can always prove humans wrong. Did you think of such things with the improving spiel of each ding dong? It is said every day in some sort of way. In most cases it is good and can be done. In others, not so much with an improving run. Can't improve tp or spoons. Take that, improving loons. The cat would like to improve the singing bass. Needs a new song to sing to my little rhyming ass.

Fill your rummer, get drunk all summer.

Saturday, July 15, 2017

Fill The Gap You Silly Sap!

Point A to Point B is where you go. But there is a middle you know. Wait, you do? I guess you are one with a clue. Other humans tend not to have one. I guess they think fake things like luck will be spun.

I've got a plan.
I'm a big fan.
Here's where I start.
Start with a fart.

As I know where to end.
No need to amend.
Start and end done.
Time to enjoy the sun.

Awww, such a nice day.
I think I'll go play.
Time just slipped away.
Not enough hours in the day.

I still have my start.
I've filled my cart.
I'll soon fill the gap.
Everyone will stand and clap.

Oh, there's a new game.
I'm ready to kill and maim.
Come here you online troll.
Such a noob as you stroll.

My ending is still in tact.
That is still a fact.
I'll close the gap,
It'll fall in my lap.

Netflix has that show.
Always wanted to give it a go.
Let's watch all 100 episodes this week.
A sure fire challenge at my creek.

It seems so far.
My start is on par.
My end is still there.
I have no time to spare.

You want to go play ball?
Sure, I hear that call.
I bet I help you win.
Let's give it a spin.

What was it?
Start some hit?
End it that way?
Forget it, time to play.

Does the gap scare you? Can't do it at your zoo? Poor poor you has no time and such? Pfffft the cat says more than a touch. A start and finish gets one nowhere at all if all they do it make excuses and stall. Could have the best idea for whatever and you can think it oh so clever. But if you are afraid of the gap between Point A and Point B. Whoopsy, may as well go climb a tree. Or maybe you should go roll in the grass. That is enjoyed by my little rhyming ass.

Fill your rummer, get drunk all summer.

Friday, July 14, 2017

To Impress With Less!

Wow, the cat can look good. Not hard in our hood. There are so many of them around that it is easy for good to be found. What's around? Follow along as we exit the pound.

Life is easy.
Life is great.
Not to sound cheesy,
But work I hate.

I live off my mother.
I live off my dad.
I sponge off my brother.
The government gives me a tad.

What more do I need?
I can sit on my ass.
Move at one speed,
And use another's gas.

The food bank is there.
Other hand outs too.
Life sure is fair.
If only everyone knew.

I'm living the high life.
I've got it made.
Not even for a wife,
Would this life I trade.

Work? What's that?
Such a foreign word.
I live like a cat.
So don't be absurd.

I'll get it done.
Next year maybe.
I live for fun.
Don't press me.

Don't push.
Don't shove.
Oh shush,
You above.

What was that?
Cut off and done?
I'm like a gnat?
Boy, you're no fun.

Hey, how are you?
Would you let me stay?
Sister, you have no clue,
Time to sponge away.

Just wow, the cat has to raise an eyebrow. There are so many around that are just fine doing nothing at all. Sponging away they do at their hall. They always find a way as well. Know any spongers where you dwell? There are so many around here. I've seen them giving many a cheer. They make the cat's output seem even more great. Pathetic they are at any rate. Now I'm done with my lazy person sass and I think I'll go rest my little rhyming ass.

Fill your rummer, get drunk all summer.

Thursday, July 13, 2017

To The Hilt Comes The Guilt!

The cat just shrugs it off and trots away. I may make you feel it at the end of the day. Ignoring you for being gone so long. After all, leaving all day is just so wrong. Catch on yet? You will with this pet.

Out to work.
So not a perk.
With the 9-5,
You try and survive.

Slaving away.
Out all day.
Can't stay and play.
Need that pay.

Kids get less time.
That's just a crime.
Pets see you less.
House is a mess.

Spouse isn't around.
No one is found.
Tired at the end.
Guilt becomes a trend.

I'm not there.
Must think I don't care.
Those poor dears.
They must shed tears.

Therapy will come.
A need and then some.
From all my neglect.
Time I did deflect.

Gag me a bit.
Who needs that shit?
Stay whelmed each day.
Guilt won't stay.

Guilt you made.
Let it fade.
For it's easy to defeat,
Even if not sweet.

Guilt where there's none,
Now that sure isn't fun.
Poor poor you.
Weighs heavy, so true.

Err umm, not!
Add to the plot.
They aren't living on the street.
Hmm, maybe life is sweet.

Do you let stupid guilt come over you? Pffft to that says the cat at our zoo. Slaving away for pay may suck. But it beats living in the wilderness and bathing in a pond like a duck. So to such guilt you can say fluck and pass the buck. Although you should feel guilty in mass if you miss a post from my little rhyming ass.

Fill your rummer, get drunk all summer.

Wednesday, July 12, 2017

All In The Wrist So Give It A Twist!

The cat likes a good twist, makes you see what could have been missed. The best are when they aren't hyped as can be. The others you can easily see.

A big twist coming,
Many are humming.
You see it in spades.
Your interest wades.

Yep, it was true.
That twist came due.
Oh well, it's done.
Now on with the fun.

What was that?
Chewed no fat.
There was a twist.
That I surely missed.

Out of left field.
Sure didn't yield.
Now off I go talking,
After a little more gawking.

Whoops, spoilers now.
It no longer will wow.
Isn't that lame?
The twist is now tame.

I guess there is a twist.
With a flick of the wrist.
The twist gets a twist.
No longer is it missed.

Or the twist of the twist,
Leaves some pissed.
They read it online.
Whoops, that isn't fine.

Umm, twist their words.
Go play with the birds.
For the twist of the rub,
You went to the site, bub.

No one made you.
You came to view.
How's that for a twist?
Now go and be pissed.

Of course another twist,
With a flick of the wrist,
Is you may get a blister,
From falling over at Twister.

All twisted up today? Like a good twist at your bay? Did you see Twister coming? That just fit in with my rhyme humming. Or would that be typing? Bah, not talking as we aren't Skyping. I'll stop twisting words in mass and just twist off with my little rhyming ass.

Fill your rummer, get drunk all summer.

Tuesday, July 11, 2017

Oh Dear, We're Going Super Clear!

You heard that right. Today I am going to rhyme at my site. Don't get confused by that. I am a rhyming cat. Don't worry, I won't make your eyes go blurry. At least for 99.99% of people out there. So most eyes I will spare.

Today is a rhyme
Rhyming is a chime.
It can take many forms.
ABAB or AABB are the norms.

For example this is AABB.
It is so clear and easy to see.
The last words will rhyme twice in a row.
You got it now, I know.

By a rhyme at my site,
I don't mean you have to take flight.
I mean by my blog on the Internet.
If you don't get it, don't fret.

You have a modem and log on.
A password will need to dawn.
Your internet provider gives you it.
You sign in where you sit.

Sitting is when your bum is on something.
Like the throne of a king.
Picture him and you'll get sitting.
That example was rather fitting.

Next you open your browser,
Don't go searching for Bowser.
Him and Mario are far away.
What was that I heard you say?

Yes, they are fictional video game guys.
Video games are so full of lies.
You can't jump down a hole and survive.
There is no checkpoint to bring you back alive.

A checkpoint is a saved place in a game.
There you can return if you die and are lame.
Death is the wrong choice of words though.
More like you didn't make it so have to go back to go.

Now you have to type in rhyming cat.
It can be anything sorta like that.
Then links will show up from whatever you searched in,
And you can take each one for a spin.

By that I mean you click on each.
Take your mouse and hit click to teach.
Now you may or may not have found my place.
You'll get there. Just keep that smile on your face.

Was that clear enough for you? The cat tried at his zoo.I think I hawked up a hairball there somewhere. Are you that super clear at your lair? Do you need someone to be that clear? It would drive me to be a non rhyming rear. We can't have that ever come to pass. So I guess I'll stick to being a not so clear little rhyming ass.

Fill your rummer, get drunk all summer.

Monday, July 10, 2017

A Tarsier Man Return As Out New Tales Churn!

The bug eyed creep is back. This makes 19 adventures for him at my shack. How can he have so many? A bug eyed creep shouldn't have any. Fans seem to like him though. So away we go.

Tarsier Man was winning.
Then bugs started spinning.
They were kind of thugs
Those nasty old bugs.

They sent him in a hole.
It was quite the stroll.
He went down, down, down,
Finding a whole new crown.

Even got freaky love.
Now he has to get above.
Kisses and hugs.
Blah to the bugs.






Tarsier Man was on a stroll.
No one was there to see his patrol.
The place was bare.
No humans to spare.

But he searched away.
Found many on display.
They were buying cars.
Looked like drunks at bars.

The evil car people had them in a stupor.
Each thought their deal was super.
Tarsier Man had to save the day.
The car people were taking all their pay.






Borlin was out and about.
He got many a shout.
He knew something was wrong.
Not wanting to play along.

He found Tarsier Man,
After beating back the clan.
Then everything went wackadoo.
All had a polka dot view.

They had to find the polka dot creep.
Those polka dots were going deep.
They were tacky too.
What could they do?






That makes three more that has come ashore. About 116 now at play. Tarsier Man sure likes to put on the weird come what may. Ever deal with nasty car people at your sea? Call Tarsier Man and he'll set you free. A fee may come to pass. Hey, he's not as nice as my little rhyming ass.

Fill your rummer, get drunk all summer.

Sunday, July 9, 2017

New Fees For You At My Zoo!

You better get your credit card ready. New fees are going to come at you steady. You will have to pay more just to visit my shore. What for? Bah, that's something of lore.

It's the same post.
Length and rhyme at my coast.
It's the same cat,
Even still Cassie and Pat.

But we're upping fees.
Money doesn't grow on trees.
So they are being increased.
Hey, at least we aren't a TV priest.

The content still the same.
Making fun of things humans claim.
The time is even in check.
Another post is always on deck.

But we're upping fees.
Just because we please.
Oh, I mean because we're broke.
Yeah, that's it, so don't choke.

No increased cost on our end.
Nothing in the mail we have to send.
Actually it got cheaper for us.
But shhhhh that may cause a fuss.

Because we're upping fees.
Like high socks to your knees.
They are being upped today.
So get ready to pay.

We're just oh so overworked.
Around our bodies are jerked.
It is just no fun.
So we'll charge everyone.

As we up our fees.
Have to keep away fleas.
Get ready to pay.
Don't forget to have a nice day.

Not even a new design.
The same spotted feline.
The same blog pics and such.
But we'll up them more than a touch.

Because we can do what we please.
Money doesn't grow on trees.
We need to take it all from you.
So look for increased fees to come due.

Pfffffft damn whiny sites out there. Making money by the bucket load at their lair. Oh, but they are still soooo poor. They have to charge more. Or charge other fees back to you. Who needs business expenses coming due. Nothing else changes but the fees. Yeah, I'd like to send fleas to all their knees. Ever see such sites like this come to pass? They can all kiss my little rhyming ass.

Fill your rummer, get drunk all summer.

Saturday, July 8, 2017

The Body Part Taken To Heart!

Look, I did it right there. Are you on the ball today at your lair? If you are then you'll get this fast. Maybe you can then go have a blast. What will you blast? Beats the hell out of this cast.

Taken to heart.
Wow, that's a start.
You put it inside you?
Damn, did death come due?

Scratching your head?
Yeah, that gets said.
Do you sit like a monkey?
You may look rather funky.

Tickled your funny bone?
Is the funny bone known?
Do you stick your fingers right through the skin?
They call that a need to go to the loony bin.

On the nose.
There she blows.
Snot and whatever.
A brown nosing endeavor?

Caught someone's eye?
Blah, nasty to this rhyming guy.
Did they pop it out and throw it to you?
That is so ewww.

Give someone a hand.
Isn't that grand.
Your very own Thing.
I can just hear the cha-ching.

Give them the finger?
One is more pivotal to no longer linger?
Can you tell me which one you gave?
I bet you are now all the rave.

Foot in your mouth?
Damn, does it head south?
From mouth to ass.
That foot must have class.

Lend an ear.
That would cause fear.
How do you get it back on?
Sure it's not a con?

A broken heart.
You sure are falling apart.
Maybe you need stitches.
Or were you cursed by witches?

See how fun going literal can be? All of those turn out rather nasty at any sea. Some can even bring on death as a taken heart means you breathed your last breath. Silly humans and their sayings. So many of them get repeat playings. The cat will stick to his known sass and just end things with his little rhyming ass.

Fill your rummer, get drunk all summer.

Friday, July 7, 2017

A Flip Flop Hate Drop!

The cat does it too. But you humans sure have more than a few. Each day there is probably 100 from each one. I'm not counting so we'll go with that under our sun.

I hate traffic.
I hate walking.
My, what a graphic.
Sure don't hate talking.

I hate heat.
I hate cold.
Aren't you sweet,
Like a growing mold.

I hate cities.
I hate towns.
Tell the committees,
They enjoy clowns.

I hate rain.
I hate drought.
Ain't that a pain,
As they cancel each other out.

I hate being alone.
I hate people living with me.
Good thing there's a phone.
Must rack up quite the sex line fee.

I hate science.
I hate religion.
So your alliance,
Is to a pigeon?

I hate sand.
I hate stone.
I guess life is grand,
On your plastic phone.

I hate working.
I hate not shopping.
Maybe try street corner twerking,
With a little pants dropping?

I hate age.
I hate the young.
Turn the page,
Your bell is rung.

I hate travel.
I hate staying in.
Life must unravel.
Isn't that a sin?

Do humans hear themselves some days? Like they are lost in a maze. Can't get out if only one is on the case. Need both to gain a middle embrace. Some are just hateful nuts I suppose, as they whine about the lows. The cat will just stick with the singing bass, even if I hate the repeat tune he sings to my little rhyming ass.

Fill your rummer, get drunk all summer.

Thursday, July 6, 2017

Time For An Essay...Umm...Yeah...Okay!

The cat is going to get you to write today. Yep, a ton is what I'm going to do at my bay. You will sure be tuckered out when we're through. Won't be jumping like and kangaroo.

Here we are.
You've come far.
You've come near.
Lend me your ear.

This is your test.
Try your best.
Double check it.
Do every bit.

Show your work.
That is a point perk.
Even for 4x6.
Show the tricks.

No, not lame.
Play the game.
Put dots of a graph,
If you want to join the staff.

Kill brain cells too.
You only need a few.
Less is certainly more,
When you walk through our door.

Now comes the hardest part.
This you must take to heart.
Spelling and punctuation is key.
Capitalization is also needed from thee.

You got that down?
Come now, don't frown.
It's just a little grammar.
I'm sure you won't stammer.

So remember what I said.
Get it clear in your head.
Now look at the pic on display.
Write us a "what's wrong" essay.

Yep, an essay is needed.
It must be seeded.
Come and write it out.
An extra sheet of paper is about.

What was that?
You fell flat?
Our 50 word approximation was too much?
Damn, we must be so out of touch.

Pffffft since when is an essay 50 words? More words in the droppings of birds. That is like five sentences or so. A whole paragraph maybe, oh no! Is an essay really 50 words? There were even some that whined like lazy turds. If you can't write 50 words you kinda suck. Must have the brain cells of a duck. So give me an essay blog land mass. It only has to be approximately 50 words to my little rhyming ass.

Fill your rummer, get drunk all summer.

Wednesday, July 5, 2017

What Was That You Spat?

 

What was that?
You fell flat?
Things are bad?
No fun is had?

What was that?
You curse the cat?
Why do that?
Are you a gnat?

What was that?
Chew that fat.
You're not great?
Can't beat fate?

What was that?
You fell flat?
Didn't we do this?
Don't give me a hiss.

What was that?
Bad's where it is at?
Now you're just twisting words.
Are you repeat tweety birds?

What was that?
It's under your hat?
Like in your brain?
Is this a thought train?

What was that?
Whoops, it's scat.
Thoughts fell flat.
How about that?

How about that?
0 = the stat.
No more doubt.
Twist and shout.

How about that?
Dusted the mat.
They flew away.
Have a nice day.

What was that?
Questions annoy like a gnat?
Treat them like a brat.
Ground them and that is that.

(Psssst...look at Pat stealing glory from the cat)
The awesome co-hosts for the July 5 posting of the IWSG will be Tamara Narayan, Pat Hatt, Patricia Lynne, Juneta Key, and Doreen McGettigan!

Are you grounded now? See, no need to raise any eyebrow. The cat gets to it in the end with my grounding trend. Grounded and wise and away the insecurity flies. Or crazy and wise. Take your pick after a few tries. Questions you give yourself the most. Let the mind sail them to the coast. Then just get back to writing in mass. You can trust my crazy not so grounded little rhyming ass.

Fill your rummer, get drunk all summer.

Tuesday, July 4, 2017

A Whoopdi Cheer Of Holiday Beer!

Robbie Raisin is back on the case. I need a show for holiday nuts to embrace. So I've come to see what you all have for me. I'm sure it's something Whoopdi Friggin Doo viewers will want to see.

Take it away, Hank. How do you fill your holiday tank?

#1

This comment has been removed by the author.

What? You tried double speak? Beer Guys, are you up the holiday creek?

Why wouldn't we want to move to North Korea? Kim Jong Un has made it abundantly clear that everyone there is super happy, and that they have the strongest military in the world. You can even choose between TEN government mandated hairstyles. That's double digits. Tell me that isn't awesome.

This is supposed to bring cheer to viewers. Theresa, are you at the brewers?

Most of the population are amazing, kindhearted people. It's just those assholes that do something stupid and the media sensationalizes it, making us all look like racist, mean, gun toting cows. 

Is that a reflection on our show? Robyn, care to give it a go?

Lots of deodorant I shall buy
To Australia I will fly.


Is it a holiday there? Caitlin, celebrating at your lair?

And I would love to visit North Korea! I think it'd be so fascinating.

Umm, well there would be fireworks coming at you. Jaclyn, are you ready to join the crew?

I'd rather have pee on my knee than a flea!

Enjoy that at your hall. Alex, ready to have a holiday ball?

Float off and die. Everything would. Crap, it would be like a real live Sharknado!

Aren't you a downer. Brian, going to be an out of towner?

That could really be what floats your boat!

Isn't it supposed to float yours? Fundy Blue, off taking tours?

I think it would be such fun to bounce around on the moon. Vomit comet

Your new nickname for fame? Betsy, ready to make a holiday claim?

My boys believe in death by dental work!
Not going would certainly be a perk! haha.


Who wants to think of the dentist today? Birgit, ready to have your say?

I think the only person who wants to fly high
Is that gravity waiver, pot smoking guy


Pot smokers may come after you. Blue, anything new?

Sniffing dog butts, you say?
Like every day?
Yikes!


Wow, now there is a fetish for you. Adam, care to tell us something true?

I more often bark than purr. I might meow though 

Fetishes are lining up. Redneck, are you filling your beer cup?

I bet Eve never had a problem knowing somebody from Adam.

And thinking of the first porn. Truedessa, are you torn?

feeling bad to the moan
or bad to the groan..haha


I guess you like ancient porn. Belva, is something born?

Well titch, titch, titch
Holy smokes ain't that a bitch


Damn, really stuck on the porn, aren't we? Snowcatcher, can something new come from thee?

Always seems to make me groan

I guess not. Silver Fox, has the porn fetish been caught?

Sounds like we're all falling apart.

That you all are. Betty, can you get us on par?

Bit confused today with now and then
trying to figure it all out when
might have to back to sleep and try again
and maybe more answers it will lend


Nope, back to the drawing board. Joanne, what do you have stored?

then, now, tomorrow, yesterday
now and then or both here to stay
up or down, then and now
turn around and take a bow


Is it any wonder why Betty was confused? Bijoux, are you amused?

Lighting a fire under my butt, so to speak, gets the job done!

A little butt play. Beverly, going to join the fray?

I hope all the fireworks are handled with care.
We don't want to lose any fingers there
.

Thanks for the public service announcement today. Tabbies o trout towne, going to end this foray?

orlin N cassie...happee canada day two ewe all furst off; N thurd...we think bugz R grate; raw, semi chewed, cooked, eaten then hurled....we canna get enuff oh em... tho de food serviss gurl willna let uz mess with moe skeet toez coz oh heart werm ore bugz that haza stinger like hornetz ~~~~~ 

What was that you said? Mary, did it cause you dread?

I am not a fan of bugs
hidden in the rugs
or lurking in dirty mugs
nor the kind one fights with drugs!

 
Another who is confused. Mary Kirkland, do you feel abused?

Ants are what kills me I had a problem with them a while back until I used a tube of caulk to plug every hole in my bathroom. lol 

Ruining holidays for ants everywhere. Rosey, are you a bug killer at your lair?

I hate them. I cooked up a batch of rigatoni the other day and when I drained it a beetle was in it. Dead and cooked. Not my idea of protein. I pitched it and ordered in. Nasty old bugs.

So you cook them in food? Damn, so ends this brood with bug and ancient porn attitude. Whoopdi Friggin Doo will sign off for today. I hope you all have a bug killing, porn thrilling holiday.

**********************************

Look at you all go. Quite the holiday show. I never knew you were all so kinky. I guess it's more fun than playing with a slinky. I'll join in and go eat some bugs though. I'm sure there is a few at our show. Even if they give me a little gas, unlike Rosey, they are fine protein for my little rhyming ass.

Fill your rummer, get drunk all summer.

Monday, July 3, 2017

It's A Breeze So Don't Up And Freeze!

The cat gets asked once in a while how he adds to his rhyming post pile. Some just can't rhyme at their sea. Or so they say to me. Ninja Wannabe proved that wrong as a while back he played along. But can do it with ease. Like a mouse to cheese.

If you have time,
Anyone can rhyme.
Even lazy turds,
Knowing few words.

The myth you'll debunk,
Just act like a drunk.
And give it a go.
What do you know.

Flippitty flopperty.
Bippitty bobberty.
Yippitty yappity.
Zippitty zappity.

You're a rhymer,
And not a mimer.
Yippee, zippee doo.
Here's a pat on the back for you.

Lossety Loossity.
Hossety Hoossity.
Jittery Jillissy.
Pittery Pillissy.

You've done it twice.
Spreading like lice.
Rolls off the tongue,
And tickles a lung.

Lumper Lipper.
Humper Hipper.
Grumper Gripper.
Wrumper Wripper.

That makes three.
Easy and free.
Yippeee, zippee, doo.
We're so proud of you.

Niffity, Nuffity.
Riffity, Ruffity.
Piffity, Puffity.
Miffity, Muffity.

You've done four.
Now you're on tour.
Proving in no time,
That anyone can rhyme.

See? It's not that hard at all. All you need to do is make up a word at your hall. Or just act like a crazy drunk. Both work when in a rhyming funk. Did you know it was that easy at your sea? It just rolls off the tongue of thee. Of course Grammar Nazi's may give you sass. But that never bothers my little rhyming ass.

Fill your rummer, get drunk all summer.

Sunday, July 2, 2017

A Contemplate On This Date!

The cat was contemplating posting today. I guess I won as I posted at my bay. Or I just let the schedule do its thing. But I contemplated it at my wing. Don't believe me? Yeah, can't blame thee.

Today I may aggravate,
As you do when you contemplate.
Or I may cooperate.
At least I won't constipate.

Will you contemplate on constipate?
If you do you may need to medicate.
Hey, I'm just saying there, mate.
There are many ways to penetrate.

That may not resonate.
But maybe it will stimulate.
Can stimulation come as you contemplate?
Or is it more of a procrastinate?

That question I did facilitate.
You don't have to evacuate.
Why not do a double contemplate.
That will be a mighty fine lazy fate.

Maybe this I should abbreviate?
That may just exhilarate.
Okay, maybe I exaggerate.
But where did that thought originate?

Are you still trying to contemplate?
Is it hard to negotiate?
You have to contemplate to rejuvenate.
Need me to reiterate?

Why not just participate?
That too you have to contemplate?
You are doing a lot of that of late.
Maybe you're trying to circumnavigate?

Or did you overestimate?
Maybe you need to rehabilitate.
That brain needs to meet its maturity date.
Unless you go and inactivate.

Far better to initiate.
No brain can humiliate.
Some may need to authenticate.
For they are trying to assimilate.

Maybe even associate.
I just am throwing out an approximate.
Time for you to coordinate.
Shit or get off the pot as you contemplate.

Are you contemplating what to say? That could be a thing at my bay. The cat is crazy as can be. Are you a contemplater at your sea? Or is that a form of procrastination for you? Are you a word flip flopper at your zoo? Use one to cover up the other with class. You can't fool my little rhyming ass.

Fill your rummer, get drunk all summer.

Saturday, July 1, 2017

Can Be Smart With A Kick Start!

Today many humans can be smarter than ever before. One can easily get info now at any shore. Well most, as some don't have internet at their coast. But is that the case? Nope. Look at that dumb face.

Stupefied they are.
Just not in the know.
Acting dumb at the bar,
Putting on a show.

The info is there.
It is plain to see.
Nothing is that rare.
And much of it is free.

But content is it.
Content to be dumb.
Here we sit,
Growing our bum.

Ignorance is bliss.
Until it is not.
Then we hiss,
All from brain rot.

Instead of looking.
Maybe even learning.
Take in a double booking,
To watch paint churning.

That we can do.
No help at all.
Right in our view,
There on the wall.

Fall deeper in.
And deeper still.
Learning is a sin.
Are you ill?

Follow what's told.
Follow what's written.
Just go along with the old,
That will leave you smitten.

Learn only what's taught.
That is the way to higher learning.
Even if some of it's not so hot,
And will never be usual in returning.

There's always some one that knows.
Why bother with it yourself?
Even if right in front of your nose,
Just leave it on the shelf.

Humans are rather lazy as can be. Even lazier than me. And the cat sleeps a lot of the day. Are you content with nothing new at your bay? Or believing what has been said without using your own head? That is about as wise as the gas that comes out my little rhyming ass.

Fill your rummer, get drunk all summer.