Sunday, December 31, 2017

Does The Fresh Really Mesh?

What was that? You thought I'd go magic day at our blog mat? Bah, we've done that a time or ten. There is no such thing as a magic day at any den. Get up and do no matter the calendar date at your zoo.

A fresh start,
Taken to heart.
All is fresh,
2018 will mesh.

Yep. It's fresh.
No pound of flesh.
All will be good.
Fresh is understood.

Whoa, hold on.
A different dawn?
You change a number,
As many slumber?

I can do that.
Easy for the cat.
2100 it is now.
I'm super fresh, wow!

But my shit still stinks.
I'm getting no playful winks.
Still my old hair.
I see it on the chair.

Pat still has a scar.
He still has the same car.
Still has the same dough.
Still the same things in the know.

The same job.
The same plan to rob.
Hey, it's just a plan.
The bank wouldn't be a fan.

Where is fresh?
Should I hit refresh?
Even with a cheat rhyme,
I see no fresh chime.

Gonna bring you off the brink?
A number change the missing link?
And I'm going to turn bright pink.
I think many mean fresh stink.

For it's a new day.
The same as any other at play.
Can do the same no matter the date.
No magic, fresh, or anything else, mate.

Do you smell fresh? Do you have pretty new flesh? Are you all magically fresh now? Does your fresh stink really wow? Getting ready to start fresh with the same stink. It is tomorrow that happens, I think. Pffft can be fresh any old day that comes to pass. Here's some not so fresh gas from my little rhyming ass.

Enjoy your winter, smash a printer.

Saturday, December 30, 2017

The No Replace About Face!

A twist and turn and many can learn. Until then though, few can see through their you know. As in they have their head so far up their ass they can't see it with such a pass. See what? We'll get there at my hut.

I can't be.
Nope, not me.
Can't at all.
Not at any hall.

I can't be.
You're doing it to me?
How can you do that?
I know each and every stat.

I'm being replaced?
I can't be erased.
You'll regret it.
I swear you'll take a hit.

You'll regret this day.
I wish you dismay.
You can't replace me.
You'll come to see.

Three months go by.
Coming down from upon high.
I need this work,
Even if it isn't a perk.

I can do it.
Yep, every bit.
It will be easy for me.
I will give you glee.

They couldn't replace me.
They failed you see.
What? They are still running?
Nah, they are really off sunning.

I'll be the very best.
I'll beat all the rest.
You'll never want me gone.
I am more than a pawn.

Three months go by.
See ya, without a why.
But I know it all.
I'm irreplaceable at my hall.

All down from upon high,
Off cooking up stir fry.
Any one can be replaced.
A fact that must be faced.

Know any of those people at your sea? They think they can't be replaced by you, another or me. Then reality sets in and finally they may see some sun on their chin. Or maybe they'll stay that way. In the end all can be replaced at any work bay. A number and that is that. One I know realized such a stat. It made the cat grin after she went down a peg or three. What? It's the little things that cause glee. Always someone ready to mow your grass. There's a fact of life from my little rhyming ass.

Enjoy your winter, smash a printer.

Friday, December 29, 2017

The Outlook Is Here For All To Peer!

So the cat ran into a nut the other day that believed everything some nut had to say. Why did she believe that? Because it had the word "outlook" in the stat. Outlook means true. My, who knew?

The outlook is ready.
Truth will come steady.
You won't be whelmed,
After this is helmed.

2018 is days away.
Actually add a year at my bay.
But we'll just pretend.
Right, on with this trend.

2018 is the year of change.
All your life will rearrange.
My outlook says so.
Hmm is that psychic mumbo jumbo?

2018 will see stocks rise.
My, aren't I so wise?
They may fall too.
Now I got you thinking at your zoo.

2018 will see computers talk.
In your ear they will squawk.
They will be like a parrot.
Every opinion they will share it.

2058 aliens will show.
Trust me, I know.
My 40 year outlook says so.
I was told by a cousin of a crow.

2018 will have you eat.
You will eat something neat.
Like grass and cupcakes.
What a great meal that makes.

2018 will have toes cold.
Yep, cold toes will take hold.
They may even freeze off.
But not all 10 so don't scoff.

2018 will put a halt to remakes.
I know that gives you the shakes.
Sorry, that outlook is a lie,
But at least it was worth a try.

2018 will have 365 days.
Woweee, what a gaze.
I saw your lip drop.
Trust me, this one won't be a flop.

Do you believe the outlook? Are you ready to change away at your nook? Maybe run to Vegas and win some dough. Hey, you just never know. Oh wait, you do because the outlook told you. Pfffft is all you'll get from the cat. My outlook is many are full of scat. But at least one thing shall come to pass. There will be plenty more rhymes from my little rhyming ass.

Enjoy your winter, smash a printer.

Thursday, December 28, 2017

A Day So Bright With No Light!

The cat is going to brighten your day with what he has to say. Or maybe I won't. Making any guarantees I don't. But you just never know. You humans use it so...

I'm sitting in the dark.
I hear a dog bark.
The mutt likes that.
Doesn't bother the cat.

Oh, an email.
That's not a fail.
It can brighten my day.
King Abubu wants to share his pay.

Nope, still dark in here.
No brightness to peer.
Guess King Abubu sucks.
He can keep his bucks.

Oh, a bird outside.
I'd like to take it for a ride.
Not any kind you'd like.
A brightened day that would strike.

Damn, it's still dark.
Should go play in a park.
Stupid bird is a fail.
Go and hit the trail.

Some great food.
That isn't rude.
I'll go for a treat.
Excuse while I eat.

That must brighten my day.
Nope, still a dark display.
Maybe I should hawk it up.
Could be re-eaten by that pup.

Could brighten her day.
Maybe that will light the way.
This darkness needs to scram.
Light needs to break through the dam.

Oh, a comment for me.
That gives me glee.
It brightens my day.
Nope, still dark with what you say.

There is a switch.
Fixed that glitch.
Let there be light.
Turned it on to rid the night.

You humans are so full of it. Such things don't brighten darkness one bit. Should I not take it literally at my sea? Bah, you should say it different to me. Anything brightening your day? Maybe a flashlight does the trick at ones bay. Hopefully you have a bright one and carry on a ton. The holiday's could brighten in mass. I suppose at least turning on the Christmas lights could do it for my little rhyming ass.

Enjoy your winter, smash a printer.

Wednesday, December 27, 2017

Screw You And You And You And You Too!

Hmm may catch an std that way. I'm sure some went into a gutter bay. I just wanted to point that out. There is no need to shout. Oh, you weren't shouting at me? You were shouting at the broken condom that umm screwed thee?

Work, you jerk.
Why won't you work?
You really suck.
What the fluck.

Stupid piece of crap.
Don't be a sap.
Work and work now.
I'll kill you somehow.

Turn on!
I have to mow the lawn.
Turn on you stupid thing.
Pain to you I will bring.

Stupid hunk of junk.
Why are you in a funk?
I will make you work.
Stop being a stupid jerk.

That doesn't go there.
You are so unfair.
I clicked this.
Did that you miss?

I never typed that.
Are you full of scat?
You need to stop.
You are such a flop.

Get out of my way.
Can't you hear what I say?
Stupid pain in the ass chair.
You just aren't fair.

Why must you do that?
Stop being a dingbat.
You stupid flucking thing.
Why won't you ring?

Open up, you piece of crap.
I'll make you take a dirt nap.
Things are about to get hairy.
So stop being contrary.

Go in and stay.
That's not the way.
I told you to stay in.
I just can't win.

Do you feel better now? Does yelling at inanimate objects help somehow? Does cursing them out or calling names do the trick? Do they work after that some slick? Your computer is a pain so you tell it so. My, that must be a blow to your computer's ego. Wait, has Skynet come due? That may explain the actions of you. Do you yell or swear at things like chairs, computers, phones or the grass? You humans always amuse my little rhyming ass.

Enjoy your winter, smash a printer.

Tuesday, December 26, 2017

Rest Your Case In Place!

The holidays are done while officially they've had their run. Unless you buy into that magic day. Pffft hit refresh on your browser and it's the same thing at your bay. But we'll get there. Time to rest at one's lair.

Rest your case,
Meaning your butt.
Keep it in place.
Sprawl out like a mutt.

Enjoy the tree.
Enjoy the boxes.
Unless you need to pee,
Then move like foxes.

As in scurry away.
No messes allowed.
Unless Depends came to play,
Then you can lie there proud.

What? There's work?
Is that so?
Bah, ignore the jerk.
That's a no go.

Boxing day is here.
Not for all though.
So we can rest our rear,
While off some may go.

You can pretend.
It's easy to do.
Maybe start a trend.
Take in the view.

The day to do so.
The day to rest.
Christmas has a cheery glow,
When you are at your best.

Go too far.
Do too much.
May get hit by a car,
Or start to speak Dutch.

That would be weird.
Far more than strange.
Rest isn't to be feared.
Do it for a change.

What was that?
There's more to do?
Excuse the cat.
I need to use the loo.

Do you rest today or keep on the go? All the go go go can really become a foe. Can suck away the cheer the next day and make you a grumpy goo at your bay. Do you turn into a grump? Hey, maybe you need a good umm hump. What? It rhymed and was well timed. A dog will always hump your leg too. Would that be restful for you? Now I rest my case with this pass and will go and rest my little rhyming ass.

Enjoy your winter, smash a printer.

Monday, December 25, 2017

A Holiday Liar Of A Fire!

The cat thought Santa came by the fire. Would he land and expire? I am looking for him in it. But I won't be fooled one bit. Not for a second year as Pat makes me peer.


He got us last year.
He got a new scar I fear.
So he'll never try once more.
No Rudolph's at our shore.


I see fire.
It won't expire.
Santa can't get in.
Fire in a tin?


Nope, not in there.
No room to spare.
I guess he'll have to use the door.
Hmm, I'll look a little more.


Nothing under it.
Cassie ignores my fit.
She thinks I'm nuts as can be.
But I just had to see.


Merry Christmas once more,
As we give an encore.
Pat may get a new scar,
These beards are once again too far.

Having a great day at your sea? I hope you are as the holidays fly free. The cat may have got a new toy or three. No fire was going to fool me. Do you have fake fire? That think just won't expire. Hopefully today was a merry pass. Now I'll go see what I got for my little rhyming ass.

Enjoy your winter, smash a printer.

Sunday, December 24, 2017

A Chocolate For Each Just In Reach!

Only one day to go and then the chocolate won't show. Or maybe a whole bunch more will but this isn't that pooping bunny's holiday thrill. Got a calendar thingy for each day to enjoy a tiny chocolate on display?

Calendar for merry.
Chocolates and not cherry.
Of course that could be popped,
Oh how the gutter dropped.

But let's move on.
Coal may dawn.
The cat can swat it.
So wouldn't mind one bit.

Yet calendars near.
Everyone give a cheer.
Counting down the days,
With a little chocolate maze.

Let's do the same thing.
Chocolate will be king.
To count the days of spring.
Eat a chocolate after each fling.

Do one for each year.
Adding to your age gets a cheer.
Of course it may fail,
They could become stale.

One for each ding.
May cost some cha-ching.
But each time you whack something with your car,
You get a chocolate not even the size of a bar.

Each time you spend dough,
Whether for bills, food or whatever in tow,
You get to chow on down.
Enough chocolate that you'll never frown.

Every time you swear.
Could get fat there.
May have to buy a ton.
Although chocolate may make swearing fun.

Every time you rhyme.
Now that isn't a crime.
Rhyme and flip open a flap.
Shove a chocolate in your yap.

I could go on all day.
Chocolate calendars on display.
Satisfying your sweet tooth no matter what.
Could even swap chocolate for a nut.

Don't you want an advent calendar for everything now? That sweet tooth will just think, wow. As will your waistline. But to many that is already fine. The cat should market away now that Christmas is about done with its calendar display. Are you a calendar user at your sea? Does eating the tiny chocolates bring you glee? Hope a merry Christmas eve is coming to pass. I'll take a calendar filled with cat treats for my little rhyming ass.

Enjoy your winter, smash a printer.

Saturday, December 23, 2017

The Ho Ho Ho Of No No No!

The cat has you ready to say no. Does that make you go ho ho ho? Was that another no? Damn, on a roll at your show. Actually more like on a familiar path as anything "yes" suffers your wrath.

What was that?
Don't be dumb.
That will go splat.
And really then some.

I just can't.
Nope, not one bit.
I'm a worker ant.
I need to take a shit.

I'm just not whelmed.
I'm over or under.
Either can be helmed,
Maybe it's the thunder.

I have a date.
I have TV to watch.
Hey, I may even mate,
After a bottle of scotch.

I have to get gas.
I have to get food.
So I must take a pass.
I swear, I'm not being rude.

It may rain.
It may snow.
I know it's a pain,
But the answer's still no.

Speaking of pain.
I have a bad back.
I have a bad brain.
I may have a heart attack.

I have to pay bills.
I need to pay me.
I must get some thrills.
I'm just a busy bee.

The gutters need cleaning.
The trash must be taken out.
The window needs re-screening.
I thought I heard my spouse shout.

It just can't be done.
Time is my foe.
I'm under the gun,
So no, no and no.

Wow, you humans reach for no way easier than yes. Is it that you want to do less? Or maybe pretend you do more? Beats me at my shore. What if no became yes more often than not? Of course that depends on the plot. Shouldn't say yes to robbing a banker or you'll go to jail where Tiny will play with your wanker. That sure deserves a no. Do a no-ing you usually go? Sometimes we jump the gun but we try to give more of a yes run. Unless dumb things come to pass. Then just pfffft comes from my little rhyming ass.

Enjoy your winter, smash a printer.

Friday, December 22, 2017

Just One More Is In Store!

There i s just one more post ready to come. Do you believe my rhyming bum? Yeah, probably not. But more is sure today's plot. Or maybe it is less. It may get confusing to some I shall confess.

Just one more.
One more in store.
Give me that extra like.
So up my numbers will hike.

I need just one more.
One more gift at my shore.
You could also be my follower.
Such a gift would not be hollower.

Give me that just one more.
It isn't such a chore.
I'm not satisfied with 50,001.
I need 50,002 to give a run.

Then 50,003.
Set your life free.
Like and follow today.
It is simply the way.

Did I mention I need more?
I need it at my shore.
As in really really need.
So come and do the deed.

Knowledge though?
Bah to that foe.
I need no more of that.
I know everything where I'm at.

Education is the same.
That is just really lame.
Whether street or book,
I need no more at my nook.

New skills?
Bah, head for the hills.
I have all I need.
No more should take seed.

Improving things?
Can it get me wings?
Nope, so don't need it.
I am already the shit.

So like me more.
Follow me as an encore.
In life I need no more,
But online I really roar.

Does that logic make sense? Hmm maybe only to the dense. One extra like or follower makes many squeal, yet learning something new is such a raw deal. Who needs to waste time doing that? So what if you have the brains of a gnat. You got that one more like. Improving can so take a hike. Pffft and I'm going to go eat glass. That makes about as much sense as this to my little rhyming ass.

Enjoy your winter, smash a printer.

Thursday, December 21, 2017

Don't Mind Me At Your Sea!

Do you mind the cat? How exactly do you do that? Does your mind stick to me? That is as eww as can be. Would explain why brainless humans are about. Their mind up and moved out.

Speak you mind.
Let it flow.
One of a kind,
What do I know.

Or one of a flock.
Baa goes the sheep.
But that won't shock.
Maybe just meep meep.

Did I speak mine?
Was it my fingers?
With the feline,
A question lingers.

Is it on your mind now?
That is a great skill.
Does it really wow,
When words come and fill?

That must weigh heavy.
Or maybe Great Scot!
Hint, I didn't quote Chevy,
Or a talking robot.

Do words make it weigh?
That must really suck.
Do they ever go away?
What the fluck.

Words on a mind.
Speaking from within.
What's up with mankind.
Mind taking must be a sin.

So speak, on and weighing.
That's quite the case.
But one thing's for sure with this saying,
Minding your own business takes an about face.

If your mind is elsewhere,
How can you mind it?
A conundrum with flair.
On your mind it will sit.

So don't mind me.
I don't want the yucky thing.
I'm no zombie at my sea,
Mind your manners at my wing.

Mind sure can be strange if taken literally what's said. I'm sure no one minds if they are the undead. Ever put your mind to this? Does it stick like a gooey kiss? Do you need duct tape to put it there? Wow, where the mind goes at my lair. At least I don't let it out to give its own sass. That all comes from the mind of my little rhyming ass.

Enjoy your winter, smash a printer.

Wednesday, December 20, 2017

A Cheerful Season For Some Treason!

I was minding my own business at my sea and then they came and bothered me. Cassie was supposed to be guarding the door. Instead she napped too at our shore. I must do all the work. That is so not a perk.


There she was.
Just because.
Look at the fuzz.
 The enemy all abuzz.


No way to more.
I checked the door.
Those three can stay out.
I gave them a shout.


Cassie laughed at me.
Another got by on this invasion spree. 
She got bounced on for that.
Yeah, I'm a rather mean cat.


I woke the old guy too.
 He hadn't a clue.
A bit senile, that one.
I can still make him run.


Or maybe not.
Hmph,  doesn't care he was caught.
Pat won't let things get grim.
But I will still fix him.


We can snub.
Take that, bub.
He snubbed me too.
How rude is that view?


Now he's scratching my tree.
This just can't be.
An attention seeker too.
All are giving him a view.


Damn that.
I'll go cause scat.
I'm outta here.
 They can kiss my rhyming rear.


They don't care.
All they did was stare.
That is just rude.
Supposed to hate my attitude.


And now they are all napping.
 Cassie is even flapping.
Or that may be a yawn.
This cheerful stuff is such a con.

Do you like invaders at your sea? Cassie is much nicer than me. Don't you think it was rude that she let them in? That is one big sin. She should get sat on for that. I'll have to go tell Pat. I now keep a watchful eye out for any who try to pass. They aren't going to get any cheer from my little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Tuesday, December 19, 2017

Let's Install And Have A Ball!

Today we are going to install a bunch. You will be done way before lunch. I tell you it is as easy as can be. It will be no problem for thee. You can trust the cat. Do you really believe that?

Easy to install.
Bought it at the mall.
Bought it at some store.
Maybe online you did soar.

The end is the same.
They all have that claim.
Easy to install.
No help number to call.

Can be done by you.
It surely is true.
You can do it.
Yep, every little bit.

Is looks confusing?
Bah, forget the perusing.
Don't look at the dohickey.
Looking makes it seem tricky.

Follow each step.
Don't lose your pep.
Because after all,
It's easy to install.

This thingy goes there.
You shouldn't have a spare.
That thingy goes here.
See? There is nothing to fear.

It doesn't work?
Well that's not a perk.
It doesn't fit the right way?
Some other gadget you need at your bay.

You need to connect.
You want it erect.
So connect with a connector.
The only way you reach the detector.

Tie some wires together.
It's as light as a feather.
Hold up and tie.
This is soooo easy to give a try.

Now you've got it.
Whoops, the house is no longer lit.
You blew the whole neighborhood.
Clearly easy to install was misunderstood.

Don't you love the easy to install? You can always just stick it to a wall. Yep, it is as easy as that. Whoops, we forgot to mention all kinds of other scat. But that is easy to find too. All should be easy for you. A professional may be easier to call. Nope, don't do that because it is easy to install. The cat will easily take a pass. I'd rather have it done right for my little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Monday, December 18, 2017

What's The Word On The Bird!

The tabbies are sure going to get a thrill as today the birds get their fill. They may picket the cat. Hey, we didn't go all bird brained where we are at. You humans already went there with plenty of birds to spare.

A partridge comes first.
Does it quench thirst?
It probably shits in the pear tree.
Does that give you glee?

How does turkey fit in?
Those gobblers don't think it a win.
They get eaten and fear it.
Now that's holiday spirit.

Turtle doves floating away.
Yeah, like they will stay.
Two birds kept in hand.
I bet the smell on your hand isn't grand.

Are French hens like French fries?
That may get a few rolled eyes.
But hey, what do I know.
Not like a hen collecting I go.

And now we have to call birds?
Does your hand miss their turds?
Do you need two birds for each?
What, no dirty diapers in reach?

Then we have geese and eggs.
Are you drunk on kegs?
Six that lay eggs can turn into waay more.
I'll let you do the math at your shore.

Oh, swans that can swim.
Yeah, that's something we want on a whim.
Like that is so rare to see.
A bird that can swim...yippeee!

Now we have a blue bird.
I guess one got lost from the herd.
But you want it to go away?
Make up your mind, okay?

And here to stay is a new bird.
Are you that absurd.
What makes a bird new?
Just because it wasn't seen by you?

It's A Wonderful Bird!
Winter Birdland is the word.
Happy Bird Days.
What? Birds are all you gaze.

Why do you use birds so much for Christmas time? Betsy may find them sublime, but does everyone? All those turkeys want to do is run. So I can gift you birds doing what birds do? My, you aren't hard to shop for at your zoo. Have a bird fetish at your sea? Bird brained as can be? The cat will stick with the singing bass. At least his singing is rare as he does it to my little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Sunday, December 17, 2017

The Cows Are Coming And Not Chumming!

The cat was out and about when I gave a shout. I said something was bullshit. Yeah, I can swear a bit. But that you know. Did you know there are farms near our show though?

A cow heard me.
It caused no glee.
She glared at me,
Yelling how I wasn't PC.

I offended the cow.
Now that is a wow.
I only said bull.
Discrimination is full.

I never said cowshit.
She was sure offended by it.
But oh it didn't end there,
She had more offense to spare.

Why did I make fun of their shit?
She was really having a fit.
Why not chickens or pigs?
Why not humans with wigs?

Why did it have to be bull?
Do bulls have a different pull?
Why not bullpee?
Or cowpee to include he and she?

The questions sure came.
They were ever so lame.
They hurt the head too.
Why couldn't she just moo?

Why not sheep?
Why not that of a creep?
Why shit at all?
What does that get one at their hall?

Don't you walk away.
I have to have my say.
You offended me.
You are so not PC.

I don't want to hear it again.
Not at any persons den.
It should be banned from speak.
Send it straight up shit creek.

Oh, I offended a creek.
I'm sorry for my speak.
I'm as bad as you.
Excuse me while I have a cowpoo.

Who knew you could offend a cow? Does that wow? PC nuts are really going to the extreme. Hmm this may have all been a dream. I wouldn't put it past humans though to get their ass up at their oh so PC show. Did you offend any cows lately at your sea? Don't you love the PC? They can suck on the gas that comes out my little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Saturday, December 16, 2017

Hit Everyone's Trail For A Fail!

The cat has seen some no so cheery people around. Everywhere they can surely be found. No matter the time of year that it is. They are sure around with their misery biz. But not for their life. Nope, others will get the strife.

I'm perfect as can be.
Nothing can touch me or we.
We are the best.
But surely not the rest.

They'll never last.
Their love is in the past.
That kiss was all for show.
Trust me because I know.

Their kids are bad.
No discipline is had.
That isn't how you raise kids.
It's like they are raising squids.

Their pets are mean.
They cause a scene.
They meow and bark.
Every tree they mark.

Their home is yuck.
I mean, what the fluck.
Who wants tacky flowers?
Sure can stare at them for hours.

Pffft look at that car.
It's a brand that should be tar.
It just never worked for me.
I know it is going to fail on thee.

Their book will never sell.
They included the word, Hell.
That is just a no no.
Trust me, I really do know.

Their job is the pits.
They can't really love it to bits.
How do they love that?
I'd rather clean up scat.

Their blog will never last.
It has few in the cast.
It is too shiny to look at.
Who wants to chew that fat?

That is one bad deal.
Who cares if you got a meal.
It doesn't work for me.
So it is an instant fail for thee.

Love the nitpickers at your sea? How it is soooooooo bad because it doesn't work for them when it is about thee. Pffft if one thing worked for everyone we may as well go jump in the sun. But nope, they are grand while everyone else is wrong across the land. I'd like to watch them walk across shattered glass. Hey, it is one way to enjoy such nitpickers if they come near my little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Friday, December 15, 2017

To My Readers And The Bird Feeders!

Anyone out there should heed this call. The cat will appreciate it all. I will get a golden litterbox and be so whelmed should it be helmed. Won't that make you glad there at your pad?

Heed my call.
Says it all.
Attention you.
Times two?

Nah, no repeats.
Hit the streets.
Come and play.
Don't forget to pay.

It is so much stress.
It is such a mess.
It is soooo hard to confess.
I need more, not less.

Rhyming every day,
Sure takes pay.
I mean I have to have a keyboard.
They cost thousands, good lord.

I have to get up and walk.
I have to maybe even talk.
Vocal cords cost, you know.
They cost thousands of dough.

Running this is bad.
So much time is had.
If only you'd donate.
I'd get a golden cat crate.

Oh, I mean keep the site alive.
Don't you want it to survive?
I know you think it the best.
It beats all the rest.

If all donated away,
$10000000 in the next 5 mins at play.
My goal would be 50% reached.
Then 5 mins later it will be breached.

So don't delay.
A rhyme must come each day.
You don't want the site tossed.
Doing this sure comes with such HIGH cost.

It's so hard on me.
Oh look, a flea.
Scratch that for me?
I swear, it's almost, sorta, maybe free.

Don't you want to donate billions now? I mean all the work of this place sure can wow. We need billions to keep it going. Pffffft and tomorrow I will have a porno showing. If you believe any of that. I got a bridge to sell you where you're at. I swear it will be nearby. Ever believe the cries of some already rich guy? Such sites need billions they say. Pffft once more is all I can say. Especially when run more by the work of an average class. Won't get free or fee from my little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Thursday, December 14, 2017

Attention All With This Call!

I want your attention today. So you better have your eyes glued to my bay. Did you reach for the superglue yet? You better or you'll get shunned by this pet. If you believe that, you may need to pay more attention to the cat.

I'd like to bring this up,
It is well known by a pup.
They strive for it everyday.
All they want is it and to play.

So I'm bringing it to your attention,
With this reminding mention.
I'm drawing your attention to it.
Even if I can't draw worth shit.

But I'm holding your attention.
Is that worth your pension?
You have to pay attention, you know.
And I'm using it a lot at my show.

So stand at attention and pay.
A 2 for 1 with attention today.
Has your attention waned yet?
You'll never grow bored of this pet.

You spring to attention each day,
As a post comes across my bay.
Would that make me the center of attention?
That would land me in detention.

But detention can be fun.
Don't have to snap to attention a ton.
Wouldn't snapping hurt the back?
Unless it is a finger snapping attack.

Can you snap a finger?
Attention can then linger.
Sing a tune and get more attention.
Or it may get you a suspension.

Have I directed your attention here?
Did you see the sign with a peer?
Was the attention of it clear?
Attention to all, the end is near.

Come to attention now.
This last bit will wow.
I've got your attention.
Don't let there be any apprehension.

This could be a great invention.
I really need your attention.
Whoops, something else caught my attention.
I'm sure one day I'll give it a mention.

Did you know attention was so well used? Has your attention been amused? Amused and abused or maybe even confused. Has your attention been infused? I'd like to now draw your attention to the singing bass. He never catches the attention of my little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Wednesday, December 13, 2017

Come...No Go...What Do I Know?

The cat has to shrug as you humans go on your way. Especially when heading toward that so called merry day. Not sure merry counts with the flipperoo. But we can pretend so at each zoo.

Christmas is coming.
The cheers you can hear.
Here that cheery drumming?
A parade may be near.

Christmas is soon here.
How is that so?
Wasn't it just last year?
Time moves ahead, you know.

It's too early for it.
I'm so not ready.
Here I sit.
Yet it comes steady.

Yippeee! It's days away.
Soon it's the big day.
Yippeee! Is all I can say.
I'm merry all the way.

Can't wait for it to be done.
It is so much work.
Who needs all this fun?
It sure isn't a perk.

Christmas is over.
Now that is the best.
I'll go relax with rover,
I'm free of that jolly pest.

I can't wait for it.
Only 364 days more.
See my cheery fit?
It needs an encore.

It's so far away.
I wish it would come faster.
Then in the snow we can play,
Instead of putting up plaster.

It's coming so soon.
Half the year is gone.
Don't play that Christmas tune.
I won't fall for its con.

Christmas is coming.
Christmas is going.
Songs are sure strumming,
With my flip flop showing.

So which one is it? You humans sure confuse a bit. Are you glad it is here or afraid that it is near? All this flip flopping can hurt the head. I think I'll just rest in my cat bed. Oh, did it get here faster too? Pffft not unless you time traveled at your zoo. If so, give me the lottery numbers that will come to pass. That will make me a cheery little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Tuesday, December 12, 2017

I Know, I Know Comes In A Row!

I know, I know. Know what at my show? I know what is best for each of you. Yep, I know it all at my zoo. I know it is best. It beats all the rest. It is best for each and everyone. It must be done.

Away we go,
With an I know, I know.
I know, I know.
An eye roll show.

This is best.
Has such zest.
I need no proof.
Don't be a goof.

Whelmed is bad.
Drives you mad.
Not in your mind.
But don't be blind.

I know, I know.
Not sure how though.
But I know, I know.
So just do and go.

Food you eat.
Meal or treat.
Eat what I say.
Put it on your tray.

Way you work.
Don't be a jerk.
Way you write.
This is how it takes flight.

I know, I know.
A similar flow.
Because I know best.
Forget all the rest.

You have your own,
Your own phone.
Your own body and feet.
Your own demons to defeat.

But I know, I know.
Because I say so.
Do it my way.
You'll never be led astray.

You have your own life.
You have your own wife.
But you'll eat crow,
If you ignore my I know, I know.

Pfffft to anyone who thinks they know what is right for you. Especially when they have no idea if it is true. Plus they haven't ever even gone through your crap. But oh, I know, I know comes from such a chap. Know any of the I know, I knows? Can find them no matter which way the win blows. Those are the types that I tell to go pound sand in mass. I know, I know, I'm not always a nice little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Monday, December 11, 2017

The Fake Cheer Needs A Peer!

Everyone is sure cheery as can be. At least more than half at each sea. Is that a difference though? Damned if I know. We'll go with more just because. Now one with the cheery buzz.

Smile and talk.
Walk the walk.
Smile and wave.
Big and brave.

Smile and wink.
Tickled all pink.
Is that a thing?
Oh right, cha-ching.

That we know.
Wallet now low.
Or credit now high.
Well's run dry.

Back to cheer.
Cheer all near.
Cheer all around.
Away not found.

Now on task.
No need to ask.
The cheer to you,
But only in view.

Cheer gone there.
With none to spare.
You really suck.
I hate that fluck.

Oh, you are in view.
I really love you.
How was your day?
Merry at your bay?

I really don't care.
But you're not aware.
I'd rather dish dirt.
Cheer I will skirt.

Did you hear?
They aren't near.
So did you really?
Damn the touchy feely.

They are bad.
No fun is had.
Oh, here they come.
How are you my cheery, chum?

Do you know any that can fake it so well when really they are damning you to Hell? Have to love the fake cheer this time of year. People will go back to themselves soon though. But most likely, you really know. The fake either want to know something or want something from you. What's in in for them it usually comes back to. I'll have cheer when they walk on shards of glass. See? I can be such a cheerful little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Sunday, December 10, 2017

Round Sixty Three Comes To Be!

The search engine nuts are still rolling on in. Few and far between for the win. But in they still come and they are strange beating their search drum. Do they beat a drum? Bah, they are probably too dumb.

such an endeavor

Typing that out was? Fingers strain just because?

singing cat oct 2016 hoo

Are you ready to run? I may scare everyone.

ugly ass old lady

No beauty in your eye? Some aren't so spry.

kangaroo "one shoe"

Have to ask Blue. He needs his shoe.

copy cat eat a rat rhyme

Eat a rat
Get rather fat
Eat a rat
You copy cat

having gift

As opposed to? Have you got a clue?

smart as a fart

Gas in the head may leave you rather dead.

such an endeavor

That it is with the gas in the head biz.

final date

That it would be. Done with your gas spree?

Fart books.

I have two. Give a look at your zoo.

bad gas mileage

And why are you telling me? I have gas of another kind at our sea.

Awesome acts of facts

Can facts have acts? May need to search out better facts.

Mine, mine, mine, mine

The voice of a feline. That is just fine.

Animals farts

And back we are to gas not for a car.

You may wish for gas after the winning pass. They are sure looking in the wrong spot as we are a snip snipped lot. But I guess they needed a thrill or some kind of crazy stopping pill.

 0ld 0lld grannie sucking them balls

Doesn't that image sound grand? Don't you want to give them a umm hand? Yeah, I'll stop there. The crazy can sure find my lair. I think zombie feet may beat that image too. Want me to show them to you? On that I'm sure all will take a pass.We'll see who next finds my little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Saturday, December 9, 2017

The Best Place To Embrace?

The cat rolls his eyes as some humans take the prize. It is not a good prize by the way. But you can pretend if you like at your bay. What is it you may ask? Why for many it is a yearly task.

Where can it go?
Where is the best?
Has to have flow.
Has to pass the test.

Can't go here.
It doesn't fit.
The wall is too near,
Can have that shit.

Can't go there.
It is too open.
It could cause despair,
Don't want any mopin.

It almost fits there.
But not quite.
The room is too bare,
May give many a fright.

That spot would work.
Whoops, I was wrong.
One may go beserk,
When they sing the cheery song.

The ornaments clash now.
They just don't work.
This spot doesn't wow,
It doesn't have that perk.

That's a tight squeeze.
I can give it a shove.
But guests may freeze.
It will get no love.

Everything is in the way.
This is such a pain.
Whelmed I can't stay.
Maybe I should board a plane?

Oh, there it is.
That is the best.
I passed the quiz.
I passed the test.

Hmm, is it right?
What do you think?
Does it get the right light?
Does it tickle you pink?

Are you like this when finding a spot for your Christmas tree? You may get an eye roll from me. Stick it up in the nearest spot. It's not like it is some dastardly plot. Or maybe the tree fairy will bite you at night if your tree doesn't have the best light. You don't want bite marks in you. So maybe you need the best view. Or maybe many are rather nuts in mass. I may go with the latter for my little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Friday, December 8, 2017

A Parade Sure Not To Fade!

Humans sure have a need for parades. I bet somewhere they have a parade for shades. All cool with sunglasses on everyone. Okay, maybe there are none. But with many on the go this time of year, let's create a few that would bring cheer.

Parades come and go.
They put on a show.
Marching or driving,
Bueller high fiving.

What's a little twist and shout?
Let those hips out.
Which brings us to one,
That should be given a run.

The rolling parade.
Sure to never fade.
Humans roll down the street.
That would be neat.

The cat parade.
Hmm can we trade?
Cat's walking like mutts.
Yeah, that one is nuts.

The shoe parade.
You may need shade.
Shoes are all that is allowed.
Nudists would stand proud.

The garbage parade.
The smell may never fade.
But all walk their trash to the landfill.
That is sure to thrill.

The cash parade.
You all have to trade.
Trade cash in order to step.
This one may have pep.

The hoarder parade.
They save even a grass blade.
They get to show it all.
More stuff than a mall.

The walk til you drop parade.
The path isn't even laid.
You just walk until you can't anymore.
That sure deserves an encore.

Parades come and go.
Most a returning show.
Would that be a remake?
Hey, it's a double partake.

Are you a parade fan? Do you march and wave to each woman and man? Any parades you want to see? Maybe Santa already waved at thee. Does that make you all warm and tingly? Maybe if you and Santa got umm mingly. Hey, I'm sure it has been done. Ready to parade comments in one by one? I may get some bad gas so I won't be parading around my little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Thursday, December 7, 2017

The Treason Of The Reason!

The cat will strike a deal with you. Heck, we may even strike two. I can work with ease. It will be a breeze. Or maybe it won't. There could be a do and don't. A want and not. Oh, now comes the plot.

No matter the season,
It's time for reason.
Reason and right.
Don't take flight.

At least not most times.
Maybe when dealing with mimes.
Otherwise you're toast.
Reason's on a weenie roast.

One way to snip snip.
May want to avoid that ship.
But reason has come to port.
So you can't hit abort.

What? You want to?
Well damn you.
Oh, I take that back.
Sorry for the flack.

There was no reason.
That was treason.
What was that?
I'll squash you flat.

Sorry once more.
Those words were poor.
I'll get some soap.
With them I'm sure you can cope.

What do you want?
Pffft see the finger taunt?
That's what you need.
Sorry that took seed.

It likes to linger.
A mind of its own that finger.
At least you didn't get the toe.
That finger I will stow.

Are you serious?
You must be delirious.
Did you escape the loony bin?
The crazy award you sure win.

Wait...don't walk away.
You should sit and stay.
Be reasonable, would you?
It's the least you could do.

Reasonable are you? I think there are a very few. All want to yell and stick to their reason. All else are just committing treason. Reason is all perspective in many a way as people like to have their say. Ever find any reasonable people around who aren't really reasonable when found? I'm sure you've found a few. Reasonable people sure like to sit and stew. They are about as reasonable as shattered glass. I wouldn't want that stuck into my little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Wednesday, December 6, 2017

An Insecure Time In It's Prime!


 Time I post.
Time I said.
Time will coast,
Don't worry your pretty little head.

It's not pretty?
Whoops, my mistake.
That's a pity.
Want a cake?

Time I write.
Time you do too.
Day or night,
Time comes due.

Truth is told.
Not truth of be.
You're growing old,
Listening to me.

The seconds tick.
Life does too.
Time is slick,
Can sure beat you.

Time will win.
Time will giggle.
It isn't a sin,
To give your butt a wiggle.

Time for this.
Time for that.
Much you can miss.
Much can fall flat.

Haven't enough.
Haven't any..
Oh life's rough.
The thought of many.

Too many tasks.
Too many wants.
Too many asks.
Time surely taunts.

Time becomes never.
Never in the end.
I'm talking like ever,
So enjoy time you spend.

Did that help out with my timely shout? People think about time soooo much. Then they tend to waste much and such. You will never ever get done every single thing you want to do, so flush that idea down the loo. Do what you can and enjoy what can be done. That way life is far more fun. Worrying about time is a waste of time. Time can go suck a lime. Now it is time I go roll in some grass. I enjoy it prickling my little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Tuesday, December 5, 2017

Today We Greet At The Season Meet!

The cat is here to greet you all today. That is just how we roll at our bay. And we do actually roll. We also go for a stroll. Has to be something good to roll in though. Okay, on we roll with the show.

Into meetings.
Season's greetings.
You stand and shake,
Making my ocd quake.

Where was that hand?
That isn't grand.
I have to wash mine.
Okay, I'm back and fine.

A stupid saying,
Gets a replaying.
So here it is,
Season's greetings and all the biz.

Get fuzzy and warm.
Beats a snowstorm.
Keeps you alive.
Season's greetings five by five.

What about fall?
Damn it all.
What about summer?
None, what a bummer.

And what about spring?
Too busy having a fling?
When does it start?
Bah, just take it to heart.

Season's greetings everyone.
That saying is never done.
Are we to greet the season?
Does the season think ignoring is treason?

Hey, December Greetings blogland.
Maybe late November Greetings is grand.
Monday Greetings are here.
Season's greetings better run in fear.

20 days before Christmas Greetings.
Hmm, may take some tongue beatings.
That one is rather wordy.
Plus one may flip you the birdy.

And we're back to spring,
Birdy ready for a flip.
Oh, wait, I'm snip snip.
Season's greetings and catnip.

Doesn't that seem dumb to say? Season's greetings is up on display. Isn't summer, spring and fall a season? Is there no greeting in them for some reason? Are people on a non meet and greet treaty through those? Only can greet when winter freezes your toes? I suppose they can get warmed by a lad or lass. No one gets greeted in any season by my little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Monday, December 4, 2017

A Social Strife With The Life!

So the cat was out the other day and some old fart, like really old toothless fart, came to play. Nosy as can be. Dull as watching paint dry as well at ones sea. A mannequin would be more fun. Wasn't that movie already done?

What do you do?
You know, for fun.
Tell it true.
Do you run around with anyone?

You sit and write?
Is that all you do?
You play volleyball one night?
Is that all that comes due?

Don't you have a social life?
That has to be boring.
How will you get a wife?
I'd end up only snoring.

When I was your age,
I did oh so much more.
I was all the rage.
I skipped every chore.

I made sling shots.
I shot those squirrels.
I killed lots,
Watching their death whirls.

Things cost less.
They cost so so much less.
They were so so so less.
Soooooooooooooo less.

We killed rabbits too.
Those slingshots were great.
I made quite a few.
No need for bait.

Did I mention less?
Could buy a whole lot more.
Come now, just confess,
You do more at your shore.

You should join this.
It's the largest around.
It would be bliss.
I'm the president hound.

Can't do less.
Don't just sit and write.
Exercising is just a mess.
Look at me, I made out all right.

Don't you love when such fools tell you what to do? Pffft many a time sure came due at our zoo. It's the same crap over and over and over again. Right up there with Flappy at our den. Maybe Toothless should get his own go. But then I'd bore you and make your IQ go low. My social life is fine by me. Most people annoy me anyway at my sea. Like Toothless can surely do. Have a great social life at your zoo? I'll stick with my hermit pass. That way I can write away each day with my little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Sunday, December 3, 2017

In Come The Dense With Business Sense!

As you know, the cat hardly bites his tongue at his show. So why start now? On anything I will give a meow. That and surely shake my head. Some people shouldn't get out of bed.

This is the price.
Isn't that nice?
Added to profit.
No one will scoff it.

If they do,
And go all boo hoo,
Feel free to play.
Sell by the end of the day.

The figures are there.
There to spare.
Those that you see,
Are worked on by thee.

The deal is done.
It's a fine run.
At least the figures say,
At the end of the day.

Whoops, we lied.
Some we had to hide.
They are under our hat.
What was the point in that?

There is no point.
We're slow at our joint.
That is it.
Slow as shit.

Nov 1st changes were made.
Which changes the figures that were laid.
But Nov 30th is when we put it in,
If you are lucky at your bin.

So in between you don't know.
You don't know because we are slow.
Slow and backasswards in every way.
We are too busy all day.

Too busy talking.
Too busy walking.
Too busy on coffee runs.
Busy by the tons.

That 2 mins it would take,
Makes our body shake.
We can't adjust the figures to make them right.
Nope, we need our 12 hours of sleep tonight.

Pffffffffffffffffffft says the cat. Stupid business practices where any are at. If Pat waited to enter stuff that long with accounting at our sea, the CRA would even be up the ass of me. Backasswards is sure the way. Any stupid business practices you've seen at play? Amazes me how some still stay afloat. They must have plenty of leaks in their boat. I've seen more common sense in a singing bass. Common sense has died many a time over says my little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Saturday, December 2, 2017

Listen To Me At My Sea!

The cat wants you to listen up. Do your ears perk like a pup? How can you listen up at your sea? Is listening down worse for thee? We'll ignore that because I want you to listen to the cat.

I have a tale.
A tale that won''t fail.
I will tell you it.
It is really the shit.

Listen to this.
Just listen with bliss.
Listen to this.
Words you don't want to miss.

May I continue now,
Before they have a cow?
Anyway, as I was saying,
With today's post displaying.

Listen to this.
Listen and don't miss.
You'll listen to it all.
Listen at your hall.

What is with you?
My story must come due.
Why are you even talking?
Stop your squawking.

Listen to it.
Every little bit.
Listen to it.
It's the shit.

Let's ignore that.
Annoying to the cat.
Let's give it another try.
Where was I?

Listen to this.
It will make you piss.
It is that funny.
Listen to it, honey.

Piss and honey as one?
Listen to your umm fun.
So back to my tale.
It sure won't fail.

Listen up.
Don't spill your cup.
It is that great.
Listen to him, mate.

Are you like that? A butt in person where you are at? Listen to this is as bad as telling about the weather when you are both together. Do you think the person listening isn't or something? Do you want attention with you listen to this fling? Isn't it annoying trying to tell someone something and another gives that a fling? Listen to my final words of sass. I don't need anyone to tell another while sitting right there to listen to my rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Friday, December 1, 2017

Decorate Away For A Merry Display!

The cat has to shake his head, even as I make decorations dead. I have smashed a few, but Cassie knocked over the whole tree at the other zoo. The mutts helped a bit but she was the cause of it.

The house is bare.
Decorate that lair.
Not just a little bit.
Make it a hit.

Get up the tree.
On it a dog can pee.
One actually did too,
At a friend's zoo.

Get the lights outside.
Stand back and take pride.
Think, you have to take them down.
But at least you can light up the town.

Then things here and there.
The typical affair.
Look and see decorations in sight.
Can't have a windowsill without a light.

Typical stuff.
But that's not enough.
Nope, not one bit.
Decorate where you shit.

Few ever see the toilet.
But you can't spoil it.
Put a Santa face on the seat.
That just can't be beat.

Having a singing tp roll.
Now that's a goal.
Sings to you every time.
You'll sing to its chime.

Chuck your toothbrush out.
What is that old one about?
You need a Christmas one.
Companies want you to buy a ton.

Put stickers on your shoes.
How can you lose?
You are just sharing the news.
No one will have the blues.

And best of all,
Decorating won't stall.
Have fake snow going steady.
Now you are truly ready.

Do you go that nuts? Err umm I mean cheery at your huts. What is the point in a toilet seat Santa face? No one else uses it for a daily embrace. No one else even sees the thing. Is your toilet public at your wing? Yeah, the cat is kinda stuck on that pass. Pat better not stick anything on the litterbox of my little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.