Wednesday, December 27, 2017

Screw You And You And You And You Too!

Hmm may catch an std that way. I'm sure some went into a gutter bay. I just wanted to point that out. There is no need to shout. Oh, you weren't shouting at me? You were shouting at the broken condom that umm screwed thee?

Work, you jerk.
Why won't you work?
You really suck.
What the fluck.

Stupid piece of crap.
Don't be a sap.
Work and work now.
I'll kill you somehow.

Turn on!
I have to mow the lawn.
Turn on you stupid thing.
Pain to you I will bring.

Stupid hunk of junk.
Why are you in a funk?
I will make you work.
Stop being a stupid jerk.

That doesn't go there.
You are so unfair.
I clicked this.
Did that you miss?

I never typed that.
Are you full of scat?
You need to stop.
You are such a flop.

Get out of my way.
Can't you hear what I say?
Stupid pain in the ass chair.
You just aren't fair.

Why must you do that?
Stop being a dingbat.
You stupid flucking thing.
Why won't you ring?

Open up, you piece of crap.
I'll make you take a dirt nap.
Things are about to get hairy.
So stop being contrary.

Go in and stay.
That's not the way.
I told you to stay in.
I just can't win.

Do you feel better now? Does yelling at inanimate objects help somehow? Does cursing them out or calling names do the trick? Do they work after that some slick? Your computer is a pain so you tell it so. My, that must be a blow to your computer's ego. Wait, has Skynet come due? That may explain the actions of you. Do you yell or swear at things like chairs, computers, phones or the grass? You humans always amuse my little rhyming ass.

Enjoy your winter, smash a printer.

40 comments:

  1. Replies
    1. Took the top
      Hank must be on the road to flop

      Delete
    2. Congrats True!
      Early risers fighting shy
      Sacrificing a few
      minutes of shut-eye

      Hank

      Delete
    3. Shut eye they give away
      For the display

      Delete
  2. Loved the title and most interesting to read Pat.

    Yvonne.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Well, that took a turn. I thought we were in for a sex tale/tail by the cat.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. lol he is snip snip
      But he could make that trip

      Delete
  4. Tell off a chair?
    It gives a huge stare
    Sits there like a dummy
    Silent as a big mummy
    It's starting to sag
    Like no wind on a flag
    The upholstery is worn
    For my chair I do mourn
    It gave a sit for a spell
    Was refreshing as hell
    It would also recline
    Watching TV was fine
    Now you're just an old lump
    So it's off to the dump
    It's so-long and good-by
    Why did you get sick and die?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. haha hmmm tell off a little bit
      Some of it is questioning it
      If it answers back, run
      Talking chairs aren't that fun

      Delete
  5. Yelling alone isn't enough. A good thump with a fist is often needed, too.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Need to give it a whack
      Or stab it with a tack

      Delete
  6. It sounds kind of screwy to me!

    ReplyDelete
  7. Often speak unkind words
    To rude driver turds
    While they can’t hear
    Even though near

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. They may have a gun
      Hope your lips can't be read by anyone

      Delete
  8. I talk to plants. Does that count? haha. Good things, though. :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Good things may not count in it
      As they are living if you give them a sprinkle and spit

      Delete
  9. There's a reason these things don't come equipped with hearing...well, except Alexa and her cousins...oh boy...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Her and her cousins may get mad
      If such words are had

      Delete
  10. I don't do this but hubby does and it's ridiculous.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yeah, seems kinda dumb
      As they yell with a ho and hum

      Delete
  11. Yeah. I don't understand how yelling at inanimate objects helps. But supposedly it does. Better than yelling at yourself.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I suppose that is true
      Wouldn't want to make any complexes come due

      Delete
  12. I feel much better cursing the computer. It works and does not sass back. Also, I will curse at other drivers - they might as well be inanimate - they are SO stupid!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. lol the slow ones deserve a curse
      As do the ones that drive worse

      Delete
  13. Screw You And You And You And You Too!
    Swearing at objects will make you blue
    Computer is a pain?
    Then make it plain
    In all instances has to work with you

    Hank

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Will work or crap out
      A new one may be about

      Delete
  14. Politeness never helps
    Wait til I start to curse and yelp
    I kick and shake the inanimate token
    I feel a lot better
    now that it's broken.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Until you go to call it
      And realize you have to dig out your wallet

      Delete
  15. I don't swear at things when they don't work, but occasionally, if I stub my toe or bang into something, I'll call it something profane that I'd never call a human being.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. lol yeah, the hurt can make one swear
      Even if it is usually our fault at our lair

      Delete
  16. I've yelled at an electronic or two in my day. Or a table leg the comes out of nowhere causing me to stub my toe.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. They just jump right out in front
      Our growth they try to stunt.

      Delete
  17. Damned computer screen
    See what I mean
    Microsoft update
    Fills me with hate
    Settings screwed up
    Just my luck
    But what the hell
    I can tell
    That I'm getting an hydraulic rise
    Computer chair wont stay steady
    Even when I'm ready
    What a surprise.

    Gary, Gary, nary contrary...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. A little thrill
      Fits the bill
      From the rise
      A blessing in disguise
      Or just a pain
      Depends on the brain

      Delete
  18. Yes, I am guilty as hell
    That doesn’t bother me and I feel swell.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. haha guilt flows away
      None on you at your bay

      Delete