Thursday, January 11, 2018

An Expert Rhyme Another Time!


I may make this expertly done as today's rhyme is spun. After all I've seen me do it 2500 or so times. I have more than that rhymes. Bad grammar there, but I don't care. I guess expert faded away. Damn, what can I say?

I'm the best.
I'm in the know.
I beat the rest,
As I watched the show.

Yeah, watched it there.
Right on the screen.
Repeats to spare.
I'm that serene.

I can do it better.
I really, really know.
I should write a letter.
I've watched every show.

It has to be true.
I said it was.
I'll give you a boo,
Just because.

I'm an expert.
That is I.
Says so on my shirt.
Hear my cry.

I never played.
Not even once.
But I expertly laid,
As I'm no dunce.

Expert is my name.
I know it all.
I watched the game.
Right until last call.

I know the rules.
They've said them all.
Those guys are fools.
What a bad call.

They need my expertise.
I'd do it waaay better.
Oh, look at that, please.
Here's another letter.

I am the best.
I'm the expert on curling.
I am above the rest.
All others leave me hurling.

Yep, I actually heard a nut go on and on about such a con. He watched it on TV so he was the best at it at his sea. Never done it one bit, but he was an expert on that shit. And an expert on curling of all things. My, that is some exciting umm flings. Are you an expert after watching things on TV? Do you watch curling with any time that's free? Wow, I think a nap needs to come to pass. I'm no expert on sweeping ice with my little rhyming ass.

Enjoy your winter, smash a printer.

35 comments:

  1. Everyone who watches Wheel of Fortune is smarter than the contestants though...

    ReplyDelete
  2. Watch on the screen and get the hang
    Become an expert with a bang
    You know it all, hey good for you
    Take all the credit coming due

    ReplyDelete
  3. Enjoyed the read as always Pat.

    Yvonne.

    ReplyDelete
  4. I don't watching curling at my sea
    Even stopped watching football on my tv
    with all the politics that cropped up there
    I started not to care
    so they lost my viewing eyes
    as I said my goodbyes

    Have a beachy week!
    Elsie

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I don't watch a single sport
      So sure not an expert on any court

      Delete
  5. Hey, I'm an expert on curling too, especially in front of the fireplace!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. That's the best spot
      Grab a comfy cot

      Delete
  6. Ha are you watching Dr. Oz or Dr Phil the so-called experts in their field of sensationalizing others plights.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I just read the interview absolutely hilarious! Hey,the cat is an expert on aliens, maybe???

      Delete
    2. Those nuts can go pound sand
      The cat sure knows to avoid an alien probing hand

      Delete
  7. I watched the Tour de France a time or two
    So I guess that makes me an expert cyclist at my zoo!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. There you go
      An expert times two at your show

      Delete
  8. You're right, watching something which takes physical skill hardly makes you an expert. Reminds me of an old series of record albums from the early '60s, the "Hear How to..." series. They had crazy things which you supposedly could learn how to do by listening to the albums! "Hear How to Play Baseball," "Hear How to Skin-Dive," and other horribly inappropriate skills for learning that way.

    Funny, today's post didn't show up in my blogroll. That's never happened before with your blog. But I knew you'd have a post ready and scheduled, so I just came here anyway!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. lol yeah, now that is just rather umm dumb
      Trying to rip off many a gullible chum

      Hmmm weird it would do that
      Always a post by the cat
      Until 2019 any way
      As the rest are set to play
      Blogger has been being dumb though
      As to reply is super slow

      Delete
  9. I've known people like that. It's funny how easy it is to criticize from the sidelines, eh?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yep, so easy to do
      But they could never do it at their zoo

      Delete
  10. I can't appreciate that curling sport..."scratches head" ~

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  11. Nope, not an expert on curling:)
    The interview at Nosey's was fun:)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. No expert advice?
      Glad it was fun and not no dice

      Delete
  12. Curling to me means curling my hair.
    But I'm not a sports person to be fair.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. watching is not for me
      Boring as can be

      Delete
  13. I have watched every Fuller House show. That makes me an expert on writing, producing and tweaking a sitcom. Just saying. ;)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I've watched them all too
      Does that make me as expert-y as you?

      Delete
  14. Me? An expert in a sport?
    I am laughing and give a big snort.
    I mix up teams between hockey and baseball
    Stick to film, my bro says, at my hall.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. haha good way to be
      So no mix up comes to thee

      Delete
  15. Gotta love the couch cushion experts. See a few shows and all of a sudden they know it all. Pft!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Pfffft says it well
      Sure think they are swell

      Delete
  16. 118 books?! Congratulations, Pat! That is truly an accomplishment! At least you aren't running around crowing that you're an expert. I have watched curling on tv occasionally ~ most recently at a bar in Arizona, which had me confused until I realized the bar was filled with Canadian snowbirds. It's always fun to watch Americans watching curling ~ LOL

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. lol they'd probably make fun or go wtf when they sea it
      We find it waaaay too boring to be a hit
      118 until the next few
      Yeah, no expert at our zoo

      Delete