Wednesday, February 14, 2018

A Flip Flop Hate Drop!

Today is the lovey dovey day. So the Hallmark cards and idiots upon high make you believe at your bay. And like sheep many go to it. So let's pretend it is really a hit. Except let's reverse and make all curse.

It's Valentine Day.
An ass hanging on display.
One with a diaper full of shit.
My, that is lovey dovey by a bit.

Actually more creepy.
But don't get weepy.
At least not yet.
Wait for Reverse Valentines Day from this pet.

Your eyes are beady.
You are rather seedy.
Your breath really smells.
I hate how you ring those bells.

You never pick stuff up.
You shed more than a pup.
You always clog the drain.
You are so pimpsy with rain.

You have too many shoes.
I hate your boos and your hoos.
Yes, those pants make your ass look big.
When you laugh you snort like a pig.

You laugh at stupid crap.
You'd get lost even with a map.
You drive like a two year old.
You stick to me worse than mold.

Your friends just annoy.
You act like a little boy.
You care more about your crap.
I hate how your lips always flap.

You say the stupidest things.
Your mind must be lost in the wings.
You repeat things 50 times over.
Did I mention you shed worse than rover?

Look, you've rubbed off on me.
I'm repeating myself like thee.
You are simply the worst thing ever.
Nothing about you is clever.

But don't despair.
Even with your ugly looking hair.
For there is no reason for dismay.
It's just happy Reverse Valentine's day.

Aren't you going to celebrate with the cat? Hmm you may get turned to scat. You will have to scatter like me too. That is if you want to live the day through. Might get a divorce as well. Reverse Valentine's Day will sure raise hell. Might need to think up a less wordy name. But then anything Valentine's is rather lame. So enjoy reversing it on lad or lass. Just don't come whining to my little rhyming ass.

Enjoy your winter, smash a printer.

56 comments:

  1. Replies
    1. In for lovey day
      Hank must be on the road or loving away

      Delete
    2. Happy Valentine’s Day
      Don’t give me that glare
      In reverse, one might say
      whoopdi friggin doo
      Who really cares...

      Delete
    3. Haha Hank could be rockin the love boat

      Delete
    4. That he could be
      Out on the sea
      The glare came
      Whoops, blame what's his name

      Delete
    5. Happy Valentine True and Pat
      Hank is not too young for all that

      Hank

      Delete
    6. Hank isn't into that
      Better off avoiding the candy so you don't get fat

      Delete
  2. Well done, Truedessa!
    No reverse day here. But we don't do much other than dinner at home and exchange a gift.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Sounds like a plan
      Not some hyped up fan

      Delete
  3. No reverse Valentines for me
    We celebrate every day with glee
    But a special dinner tonight we deserve
    At home, alone, with no commercial curve

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You celebrate love every day
      It's like sunshine's brightest ray

      Delete
    2. Home with no commercial crap
      Sure is the way to take the lap

      Delete
  4. That wouldn't be very nice! Though on some website comment boxes, this seems to be the norm.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Seems to be every day
      As the nuts come out to play

      Delete
  5. Anything reverse is quaint
    Put things in a place they ain't
    I love to be iconoclast
    Makes this life a great big blast

    ReplyDelete
  6. Us kitties are always pleasant! Happy Valentine's Day Pat and da cats!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Pleasant as can be
      Unless a new cat bothers we lol

      Delete
  7. I always wondered how awkward it is for a couple that just started dating in late Jan or early Feb to celebrate. The balance of doing more than nothing but not going overboard is a tough question

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yeah, can find yourself in a pickle
      Too much you're nuts, too little you're fickle

      Delete
  8. Happy Valentine's. We are sweet to each other every day. But I like a card and he complies willingly. He is going bowling tonight for his league and that's fine with me. I get the big screen tv on my own!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Get to sit back and relax away
      At the end of the day

      Delete
  9. I think Reverse Valentines Day is a great idea. Then people who don't have dates or good relationships can have something to celebrate.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. They could do something with ease
      May even please

      Delete
  10. You laugh at stupid crap?
    Can crap be stupid? Well, snap!
    A turd minus a brain
    Would that turd be insane in the membrane?
    Valentine is my ex
    All she wanted was....
    Um... money
    Just so you know
    At the Kitty Cat Show

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Be one special turd
      May have its own word
      Money from the wallet
      Can you still hear her call it?

      Delete
    2. Honestly? Yes.
      Did you have to guess? :D

      Delete
    3. haha nope, knew it
      That's some rough shit

      Delete
    4. Valentine is your ex?
      Angie leave you....

      Delete
    5. I think he was making fun
      With his run

      Delete
  11. Sounds like Honesty Day to me
    and that's every day at my sea
    Perhaps that's why I have no boyfriend
    or even someone to pretend
    to be my friend.
    That's not really true
    I have a teddy bear or two.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Can't get a thrill
      From a teddy bear fill
      But then no nuts abound
      So that's good to have none around

      Delete
  12. orlin N cassie....de onlee thing we lovez iz R food dish when itz full & R litter box when itz emptee...N if de FSG iz reedin thiz; we lovez her two { only sew her takez ta task R dish N box ~~~ } ♥♥☺☺

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. haha have to keep her on task
      Don't want her tipping into the flask

      Delete
  13. Congratulations! You've written the perfect counterpart to my "Anti-Claus" Christmas poem!

    And if you turn a Valentine's Day heart upside down, it does kinda look like someone's ass!

    And by the way, it is perfectly acceptable to slap the crap out of anyone who says "Valentimes Day" instead of "Valentine's Day."

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. "Valentimes Day"? Who would dare say such a thing?

      Delete
    2. haha had to go anti at our sea
      Glad it worked for thee
      Yep, give it a flip
      Quite the ass trip
      Slap we shall do
      If out that does spew

      Delete
    3. I've heard it several times, Blue! I even saw an episode of Chelsea Handler's Chelsea Lately where Chelsea corrected a guest who said "Valentimes." I guess some people figure Christmastime, summertime, Valentime...

      It's like people who say "Pokey-man" instead of "Pokemon." Maybe they're thinking Superman, Spider-Man, Pokey-man...

      Delete
    4. haha I've heard Pokey-man quite a bit
      I quickly correct that shit

      Delete
  14. Two of my sons gave me gifts for Valentines day.
    Lovely flowers from one and yummy cookies from the other.
    They made me really happy, thinking of me in such a nice way.
    Happy Valentines Day to you.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Great they thought of you indeed
      And made your day at your feed

      Delete
  15. Is the cat speaking to you?
    Do you shed a hair or two?
    Your cat loves to be a critic about your ass
    Wait...so does my cat-she has tons of sass.
    What else can I say to my cat
    but Happy Valentine's Day
    she just gets annoyed and scurries away.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. haha sees it in bare view
      So a critic can be the two

      Delete
  16. I bought a huge LEGO kit for my youngest for Valentine's Day. I don't usually go all out, but he is such a good kid. I had a great time seeing his face light up. AND he got a real Valentine from a GIRL at school today, so he's a pretty happy boy, lol.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. haha into girls at your sea?
      Double win for him came to be

      Delete
  17. I will do my best to avoid a reverse day.

    ReplyDelete
  18. Hmm, sounds like something an X would send:)

    ReplyDelete
  19. As I don't have a love in my life,
    Valentine's Day passes me by.
    But do have wonderful memories of those,
    That I had with my late husband.....I sigh.

    Yvonne.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Just a day anyway
      Let it pass by as you play

      Delete
  20. Not feeling the love, eh? My husband came home and thanked me for not being the mushy kind of girl. He was like "I was at Costco and saw all these men walking out with overpriced flowers and candy. Thank you for not needing that crap on a Hallmark holiday!" I'll snap up the half priced candy for myself the day after and be just as happy lol

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. lol the way to be
      No money wasted to please thee
      And no feeding the Hallmark machine
      Like so many on a screen

      Delete
  21. I hope that you had a great Reverse Valentine's Day, Pat.
    My husband would go for that!
    Nevertheless, he took me out for dinner ~
    not chicken, but still a winner.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. haha chicken is the only winner here
      Otherwise we'd run in fear

      Delete