Monday, December 31, 2018

The Magic Number While You Slumber!

The time will magically change tonight. That will make everything all right. Yep, it surely will. Go to bed and dream of your next thrill. Oh, was that a pill? Damn, you had to pay another bill.

2018 is nearly through.
Did a good year come due?
Did it rather suck?
Ready to pass the buck?

2019 is nearly new.
Did a good year come due?
Did it rather suck?
Ready to pass the buck.

A repeat rhyme.
Done for a time.
Done for a point.
As always at my joint.

Or maybe not all the time.
But hey, went with the rhyme.
But still got a point.
Magic shall soon anoint.

There you go.
Poof, a rhyme show.
It was magically done.
And what have you won?

The exact same crap.
Sorry there, chap.
18 or 19 or 55,
All the same kinda dive.

You won't magically be better.
You won't magically get some winning letter.
You won't magically have a better year.
You won't magically find cheer.

It could even be worse.
You may even curse.
Not like a curse though,
For they are bs, you know.

Just like your magic.
My, how tragic.
Things can't magically be.
Hold on....I had to pee.

Now I'm back.
Magic I lack.
I had to let it flow.
Oh look, a new low.

Did the cat spoil your mood? The cat loves to give the magic day attitude. For humans are rather pathetic as can be. Yeah, things will magically change because a new number came to view for thee. And I have a bridge to sell you too. It comes with its own loo. Get it while supplies last. It will magically get there fast. Nothing will change unless you want it done and no magic day will make it be spun. Yep, you'll even still have to mow the grass. Not sorry to say, from my not so magical little rhyming ass.

Enjoy your winter, smash a printer.

Sunday, December 30, 2018

A Guiding Light Takes Flight!

The cat will guide you today. It will be easy as can be at our bay. I'll guide you right to that spot. That spot that is hard to be caught. It just must be done. So begins the fun.

The cat is here.
Look and peer.
I'm straight ahead.
Use the eyes in your head.

See the words?
Forget the birds.
See what I typed?
Nothing was Skyped.

Now move one down.
Don't go to crazy town.
Rubber rooms have no internet.
At least that is a safe bet.

Don't quote me on that though.
I can't say I really know.
You just lost your right to sue.
It's not my fault you haven't a clue.

Now continue down the line.
Read the words of the feline.
Use your brain and eyes.
DO NOT look to the skies.

Look straight ahead.
Ten will be said.
That's ten times four.
We are half way over the tour.

Now read the send off below.
It is something you know.
It always comes to pass.
It involves a rhyming ass.

Oh, don't get alarmed.
No donkeys were harmed.
Wrong type of ass.
They eat the grass.

Then click the box.
No need to wear socks.
Click it and type.
Lay it on thick with comment hype.

Tell how the guide did.
Did it have your bid?
Did you learn everything needed?
Oh, and make sure post is deeded.

Now wasn't that grand? You got a guide to use my land. Don't you love such things? Next maybe a guide will come to flings. Wouldn't you love that? Can be done even by a snip snip cat. Ever have any useless guides come to pass? At least I proved I can guide people with my little rhyming ass.

Enjoy your winter, smash a printer.

Saturday, December 29, 2018

The Tweeting Spirit Makes You Fear It!

This will make you think the new year is grand. I'll give your so called magic a hand. People say such magical things after all. On Twitter they just never stall.

My goal for today was on time.
So it didn't get stopped by a mime?
Love is friendship that has caught fire.
Damn, dial 911 if things get dire.

pornomat: more...
No thanks at our shore.
It is national fruitcake day and I can't believe it.
My, the fruitcakes are sure coming out to twit.

The weene side.
Between a right and left ride?
Take a stand against crime.
Is that like the equivalent of a talking mime?

Men and women need to understand what makes each other trick.
Hmmm the coppers may then arrest you some slick.
I'm on the loan, okay?
I don't know, did you crush it at your bay?

This morning I started my second full week.
A baby genius just gave twitter a peek.
Stock fell and rose and where were you?
I think I was dropping something in the loo.

Cats talk with their nails.
Only when humanity fails.
My job is all jobbed out.
So can you still call it a job when about?

Meals take free.
Days old, so no fee?
Why must animals eat my grass?
Because you didn't have a sign saying do not trespass?

Can you hop and eat?
Wouldn't that ruin any treat?
Things can't go wrong for me.
And you are complaining why at your sea?

Boiled eggs and toast.
And you just wanted to boast?
Stylin with my rocking boots.
And we should give two hoots?

Don't take the wave, take the ocean.
My, that may cause a world-wide commotion.
With new years coming now is the time to get ready for the magic.
Another sucker has been born, how tragic.

And there you go. Don't you love a magic show? The words are so magical for you. Now you can go and tweet a few. Tweet the magic far and near. Be sure and let everyone hear. For it is oh so real. And pssst I'm really a rhyming wheel. Any magically dumb tweets that you've seen come to pass? Or maybe just a few funny ones in mass? Or a spambot lass? I don't need any pornomats to wipe my little rhyming ass.

Enjoy your winter, smash a printer.

Friday, December 28, 2018

The Reject Way Here Today!

The cat will reject you today. Oops, now I have nothing else to say. I just rejected you and you ran away. I hope you didn't cry over what I had to say. That hurts the cat's ears. So you can keep the tears.

A simple rejection.
That is a detection.
It comes and it goes.
There are highs and lows.

Can't sit and neglect.
Always a reject.
Rejection for you.
Rejection times two.

May turn into a million.
Could stray toward a billion.
I am too lazy to count.
But it is a high amount.

See? I rejected counting.
Like Pat rejected me mounting.
How rude is that?
Making me a snip snip cat.

Are you back to neglected?
That I just detected.
Sorry, it's been rejected.
Keep the poor pitiful me infected.

What else is new?
I just rejected you.
No need to talk.
Did you just balk?

Oh rejected me?
Can I get a yippee?
You got rejection for that construction job?
I guess accountant you couldn't stand up to construction Bob.

You got rejected by the NBA?
And why? Because golf is what you play?
Damn, I feel rejected now.
I'm sure in the NBA with my litter box skills I could wow.

You got rejected for a loan?
You got rejected from a phone?
You got rejected from a date?
Maybe you better get one you can inflate?

You rejected my help?
You rejected my yelp?
Can you do that when it isn't done?
I'll reject you once more just for fun.

Do you feel rejected yet? Did you get rejected by this pet? Does rejection make you hiss and spit? Guess what? Learn not to give a shit. You reject things and people and whatever every day. You just rejected traveling to Timbuktu at your bay. Sometimes rejection also needs to come to pass. Sorry, not really, a golfer can't get into the NBA with my litter box skilled little rhyming ass.

Enjoy your winter, smash a printer.

Thursday, December 27, 2018

Only Needy Comes A Greedy!

I need to type this today. If I don't, I can't say. It is too tragic. I'll drain the world of magic. Damn, it was said. Off with my head. How can this be? I need to go climb a tree.

You are in need.
In need of a shower.
Forget about the greed,
You grow more rank by the hour.

You are in need.
In need of a car.
Yes, you are indeed.
Your new one can't go far.

You are in need.
In need of travel.
It must take seed.
If not, life will unravel.

You are in need.
In need of that sparkly rock.
If not, your eyes will bleed.
You'll then go into shock.

You are in need.
In need for a lottery win.
Rub my hands in greed,
If I lose I'll turn into Rin Tin Tin.

You are in need.
In need of a drink.
You just picked out a weed,
So you deserve a glass clink.

You are in need.
In need of a million dollar home.
You have two hamsters to feed.
They need a place to roam.

You are in need.
In need of a date.
You have built up seed.
You really need to mate.

You are in need.
In need of a switch.
Want is your deed.
Isn't deciphering between the two a bitch?

You are in need.
In need of a kick to the head.
Hey, then maybe the need will be freed,
And you can sleep tight in bed.

Do you need to say anything today? Do you need to come clean at your bay? Do you need to shower? If no, you either did, or that could be why dates barely last an hour. Hey, I needed to help you out with two. Damn, now I'm doing it too. I wanted to help you out with two. But did I really at my zoo? Maybe I just wanted to give the needy, who aren't really needy, some sass. That sounds more like it with my little rhyming ass.

Enjoy your winter, smash a printer.

Wednesday, December 26, 2018

Ever So Swift Is The Return Gift!

Are you one of those? Those where the grass grows? You'll see rather fast. You may not want to tell the cat if you are part of the cast. He may make fun. Get ready...and...run!

We have to get out to the mall.
The mail may stall.
We have to get there.
Shoppers better beware.

We aren't here for the deals.
Nope, we made sure we never broke the seals.
All packed and set.
Make sure nothing gets wet.

Here we go.
Daylight on the go.
Bah, we left in the dark.
Wanted to get a place to park.

The vehicle is full.
It was rough to pull.
We have all of this stuff.
We can really get enough.

Now let's return.
Money we can earn.
A gift to us.
No muss, no fuss.

Whatever that means.
I see those TV screens.
I really want that.
Those ones are super duper flat.

But first the return.
These shoppers should learn.
Learn to get out of my way.
I have to return for pay.

Then I may spend.
I'll never lend.
But you can lend to me.
I'll even return it for thee.

Add to the pile.
Takes up many a floor tile.
I asked for it because it costs a ton.
I knew it would make a grand return run.

But, shhhh, don't tell.
Isn't returning swell?
Oh, off to the next store.
You better move aside as I come ashore.

Do you ask for expensive things just so you can take them back? Some surely do at their shack. Somethings don't fit, get two off, etc. and all that stuff, but some ask just to get cash from fluff. Why not just ask for money from the start? Did they suffer a brain fart? Would be less hassle than returning with all the nuts out in mass. Never fear, I'll return tomorrow with my little rhyming ass.

Enjoy your winter, smash a printer.

Tuesday, December 25, 2018

A Merry One More At Your Shore!

That day has come back. The one with plenty of boxes appearing at our shack. And other messes that allow me to play. Hey, I also want to have a merry day.


Hope a great one is had.
All kinds of fun at your pad.
And whatever else you do.
Maybe you go to the zoo.

Maybe you itch.
That may be a bitch.
But they make pills for that.
Makes the fleas and worms go splat.

Now that's a cheery thought.
I guess it beats a killer robot.
At least worms let you stay alive.
Robots may make you take a nosedive.

A sex bot, you say?
My, what a merry day.
Not sure where or why.
Hey, I just let it flow on the fly.

So Merry Christmas to one and all.
Hopefully you don't have a great fall.
And remember that if all you got was coal,
At least this scary Santa didn't come by for a stroll.


Didn't you just want to see that once more? I gave you your Christmas wish at our shore. I'm just such a merry cat. Now I shall stop chewing the fat. I'll let you do that with your bird. Stuffing a bird's butt is so absurd. I really had to give that sass. Merry Christmas from Pat, Cass, and my little rhyming ass.

Enjoy your winter, smash a printer.

Monday, December 24, 2018

Rush On In For Today's Spin!

And so the day is near. The day when all are around and the mind is clear. They day when there is relaxation before the next few months of taxation. Damn, this isn't a summer beach day. I really need to watch what I say.

To and fro.
Go, go, go.
Never sit and stop.
Can't be a flop.

The kids are coming.
There's holiday humming.
Have to stop and watch.
I forgot the scotch.

That meant tape.
But wine of grape.
Now I have to go out.
I may as well get trout.

We'll need this and that.
I forgot the cat.
He needs a gift.
I will make it swift.

What's with the line?
This isn't fine.
I've got things to cook.
I have to give that a look.

Where'd you get that?
That's where it's at?
I think I need it.
It would be a hit.

The line is longer.
My arms need to be stronger.
This is a load.
Slower than a toad.

Why are you all here?
Where is the Christmas cheer?
Don't give me that look.
You should be home at your nook.

That's where I need to be.
The cat knocked down the tree.
Do you see what they sent?
I'm going to put him in a tent.

I forgot camping gear.
That store is near.
50 presents just isn't enough.
Damn it, I still have a turkey to stuff.

Are you one of those? Running around like a chicken with its head cut off and striking a pose? I think many a thing can wait. 50 presents is a fine rate. No need to go this way and that. But then I'm just a relaxed cat. I may need a nap after that though. You humans are supposed to be relaxing but still on the go go go. And, yep, you are still out in mass. Seen it plenty a time on this day with my little rhyming ass.

Enjoy your winter, smash a printer.

Sunday, December 23, 2018

The Worth Of Dough Gets A Go!

The cat can just relax. I don't even have to pay tax. I'll leave that to my slave. I'll just curl up in my cat cave. But you humans sure do a lot. Then things go to pot. Then you wonder why. Maybe the dollar sign in each eye?

Have to go.
Have to run.
Need that dough.
Can't have fun.

20 hour days.
6 days a week.
My eyes my glaze,
But I get the dough I seek.

The 7th day of rest?
Bah, who needs that?
I work 21 hours at best.
I'm not a lazy cat.

Sleep can wait.
It isn't needed.
Money is my fate.
Tons is seeded.

Look at my account?
It is so large.
The tax man takes their amount,
But I'm still in charge.

Months to years.
I've made that much more.
But I don't get cheers.
No one's at my door.

No one at all.
My body is toast.
But I won't stall.
I will just boast.

I've got it all.
All in my account.
It sits and won't stall.
It's so much I can't count.

Do you want to see?
Come and look.
I worked for my money tree.
I don't even have need for a nook.

Look at it there.
Just sitting in the account.
I have money to spare.
A cash mountain to mount.

Do you humans hear yourselves sometimes? My, what the chimes. One actually went on and on to me about it. He thought he was the shit. Broken with nothing but a tiny apartment at his sea. But he had all that money that never goes on any kind of shopping spree. He works, it sits. That would give me fits. What is the point in having a ton and nothing at all? Crappy health leaving one curled up in a ball? We'll take the middle of the grass. We don't want Pat not spending money on my little rhyming ass.

Enjoy your winter, smash a printer.

Saturday, December 22, 2018

A Risky Post At My Coast!

Today the cat will risk it and post. I mean the NSA may not like me at my coast. They may throw me in a hole. Save me though if that is their goal. I'd have no litter box in there. That wouldn't be fair.

You are at risk.
Should I go tisk tisk?
Maybe a tisket a tasket?
Hey, it rhymes with casket.

You can pre-buy those.
They have them sat in rows.
But that we have done.
I don't want to risk a repeat run.

I may get slapped.
Maybe even trapped.
Trapped with alien bears.
They would have no hairs.

I'd risk going blind.
It would be one of a kind.
Then I'd be lunch.
I can just hear the crunch.

I went off track.
I guess I risked it at my shack.
Or did I risk making a point?
Do I ever risk those at my point?

It could be risky to do.
I may risk a few.
Now I just ignoring you.
Whatever is a cat to do?

Yeah, I risked that.
A question from the cat.
You did risk coming here.
Zombie feet could have been near.

You risked turning the computer on.
You risked falling for a con.
That email from King Abubu looks mighty fine.
Don't risk it and risk trusting the feline.

You also risked shock.
You risked slipping on a sock.
You risked smacking your head.
You risked all when you got out of bed.

You risked it and what?
Nothing at your hut.
Damn, it was ever so risky though.
I think I'll risk ending this flow.

Do you ever think things too risky when they are not? Did you know you could wake up, fall over, and begin to rot? All it takes is tripping and whacking your head. Then oopsy, you're dead. You risk that every single day. Yet you still go out to play. Or maybe to work. The latter isn't a perk. I risked instilling fear with this post in each lad and lass. No need to thank my risky little rhyming ass.

Enjoy your winter, smash a printer.

Friday, December 21, 2018

A Revive This That You Can't Miss!

The cat is going to bring back the dead. Yep, you heard what I said. I'll do the hokey pokey and spin all about. I think that is what gets it out. Heck, I don't really know. It works on such and such a show.

Time to revive.
Can't get out alive.
But can be brought back.
Even after a heart attack.

Did that you know?
May not work on a crow.
It also may not work on you.
You need to have a whole crew.

Throw in lots of dough.
Then a reviving you can go.
Back to top form.
Hey, it's the norm.

You see it every day.
They bippity boppity boo away.
Then they bippity boppity boo back.
Their hocus pocus sure don't lack.

The fanny pack returns.
Out it churns.
Grab it while it lasts.
Could go into past blasts.

Like the flip of the blast.
Blast from the past.
That saying may be revived.
Or another that never survived.

Oh look, a show.
It's one people will know.
Let's throw out the dough.
We'll add in so and so.

A movie or three.
Another show for thee.
Why not make that three?
We will revive with glee.

No doctor needed.
No medical supplies are deeded.
Just bring it back.
Our reviving doesn't lack.

Hmm we revived a non dead thing?
No zombies for a fling?
Damn, how does that count?
Who cares, we revived a high amount.

Do you love the revivals going on? On your screen many sure do dawn. How can you revive something that was never alive though? Is there a trick to reviving non-living things that we don't know? Do we even really want to know? Maybe that would be a no go. Soon they may even revive the singing bass. At least no one will go reviving my never ending little rhyming ass.

Enjoy your winter, smash a printer.

Thursday, December 20, 2018

This Post Will Differ From A Butt Sniffer!

A different post will come to be. It will be a boring one from Pat at our sea. Yeah, and I'm a rhyming dog. But we will let differ be a hog. For it shall not. Differ will be proven not to be so hot.

This post will differ.
I mentioned the butt sniffer.
I guess I ruined that.
Same rhyme at my mat.

No, no remake.
It differs from that partake.
I used it right.
Differ has bite.

Or maybe not.
Know of the remake plot?
Know of my hate?
Why would differ need to mate?

Wouldn't it just be no?
Differ need not be given a go.
Differ becomes filler.
Like a background guy in Thriller.

Was there even any?
Beats me if one or many.
This isn't a music post.
It differs from that at my coast.

Common sense was had.
You know it differs at my pad.
That filler cropped back in.
We can't let differ win.

This movie differs from that one.
One aliens come and blow things up a ton.
The other a cartoon frog hops into a pond.
Nothing happens beyond.

Hmm differ is still stuck.
What the fluck?
It sure isn't whelmed.
Over and under differ when helmed.

Isn't that the point?
A differ with over and under at any joint?
I beg to differ.
I really must be a butt sniffer.

Now differ is begging.
Next it will be bootlegging.
Then it will go to jail.
There differ will surely fail.

Do you beg to differ with me? Are you a differ user at your sea? Did you know differ was just filler? Were you a background guy in Thriller? Do you differ things that are obviously different things? Like a worm and a bird with wings. Of course they differ like an ant and the singing bass. I won't beg to differ that, or much, if anything, else with my little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Wednesday, December 19, 2018

Going In For The Kill That May Not Thrill!

The kiddies may be out after the cat. I can't have hair pullers where we are at. I may have to lock the door. I did something they may hate at our shore. Bah, it was fun and had to be done.


Cassie found it first.
But I wanted to make it burst.
That thing looked good to eat.
I could chew the corners off some sweet.


Then came the scare.
Cassie gave it a glare.
I thought it dumb.
Time to kill the merry chum.


Hmm how is it in there?
Oh what do I care.
I'll rip and tear.
All is fair.


Nope, he doesn't have balls.
Can't go decking any halls.
I know what it is like.
Snip snip makes those balls take a hike.


You'll lose that hat.
I'll squash it flat.
Don't go jingling bells.
Tough love sells.


Don't play dead.
Off with your head.
That beard has got to go.
It is itchy, don't you know.


Back to the hat.
I must have that.
Rip and tear.
I bet you have no hair.


Stop singing to me.
I have no glee.
I don't want to watch out.
I'll make you pout.


Yay, he's dead.
Nothing else is said.
Now let's see about this box.
Good thing it has no locks.


How rude is this?
Came back for more bliss.
I was taking a nap.
I have to end this chap.


Open, you stupid thing.
I know you are on a spring.
Don't hide from me.
I'll make you fly free.


I told you so.
This singing has got to go.
I don't like watching out for fat guys.
They can crush you, word to the wise.


So here it is.
This singing biz.
I'll end it.
Rip it just a bit.


Just a bit more.
Got it at my shore.
You will sing no more.
Time I ended your merry lore.


No box for you.
I'll shake you until you turn blue.
This is so merry to me.
So merry that I'll do it for free.

Yep, I killed that magic fat guy. He wasn't really that spry. He popped out of that box and tried to dance. I would have none of such a prance. I yanked him out and made him pay. Kill any Santas at your bay? Did you know Santa was neutered too? Damn, no wonder a creepy fat guy can come into any zoo. He can't do a thing. Up nothing shall spring. Now I'll go back to making sure he is dead with another pass. Can't have things springing up on my little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Tuesday, December 18, 2018

Ask You Don't Or Like You Won't!

There are things that you never ask. They are something that may lead to a task. You don't want any of those. The cat will let you in on them so you don't strike an "oh no" pose.

Things to do.
Things to get done.
Some told to you.
Some given a run.

Then you finish.
Then you smile.
Your hope may diminish,
Things can turn vile.

Why is that?
You open your yap.
You chew that fat.
So comes another trap.

Is there anything else I can do?
Oh, I have one or two.
You just gave me a clue.
Thanks for your words so true.

You can do this.
You can do that.
You bring such bliss.
You're where it's at.

What else is there?
Did you ask me?
You really do care.
I have something you should see.

It will only take a day.
Two days at most.
I have to go away.
You deserve to boast.

Is that it?
That's all you did?
Are you sure that's a hit?
Did tasks get hid?

Oh, thanks for asking.
Is there anything else for you?
Sure, I know you're good at multi-tasking,
So I've got plenty more for you to do.

It will only take a week.
You are so nice for asking.
Your work will never peak.
Excuse me while in the sun I go basking.

Do you ever ask that? Anything else or what else where you are at? That usually leads to plenty more. We avoid that at our shore. What else can I say to you? Oh, I've got plenty more to come due. What else do you want? I have plenty more posts that may taunt. Look, I'm ahead of your what else stuff. I guess it doesn't always end up rough. I will go before anything else comes to pass. I don't want to be too much of a mouthy little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Monday, December 17, 2018

A Label Making Kinda Faking!

The cat will label you all today. Or at least label things at play. Labels are everywhere. We need them at our lair. They are so trendy. Some even come out bendy.

A label for me.
A cat you see.
A label for you.
A human for view.

That's the words.
They come in herds.
Saying not showing.
Out they are flowing.

This is a door.
A label that says no more.
This is a floor.
Again, says no more.

This is a wall.
The label says it all.
This is the ceiling.
This label has feeling.

Need I do more?
I must go explore.
You just have to know.
No. These labels don't glow.

This is a post.
You'll like it most.
That is a happy feeling.
A bit better than the ceiling.

This is a toilet.
Did the label spoil it?
This is a hair.
Bald people may stare.

This is a handle.
Less intriguing than a candle.
This is a window.
The label still doesn't glow.

This is a switch.
Label shows which is which.
Don't mess it up with the wall.
Two labels for all.

This is a cat.
I know you know that.
This is gas.
The label blew off with its mass.

Have you ever seen anything labeled that was just lame? Did you really need to know such a claim? Oh, this is a wall. Umm, err, okay, I didn't think it was a bathroom stall. It's good though that I labeled myself a cat. I wouldn't want anyone thinking that I'm a unicorn where we are at. My labels my turn out rather crass. But at least they'd be fun from my little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Sunday, December 16, 2018

A Dictate That With The Cat!

This is what you have to do. This is what has to be done at my zoo. I don't care who you are. I don't care if you have a car. This is what you MUST do. I will dictate it to you.

You must read each word.
You must flip off a bird.
You must eat with a finger.
You must let your eyes linger.

You must comment with 1000 words.
You must flip off more birds.
You must make sure they are geese.
You must never use meese.

You must kiss a toad.
You must carry a heavy load.
You must go to that spot.
You must find that spot or rot.

You must find they.
You must roll in hay.
You must jump in a hoop.
You must never tramp in goop.

You must set a fire.
You must never aspire.
You must let your eyes go cross-eyed.
You must never run and hide.

You must seek things.
You must strap on wings.
You must go back to the geese.
You must now use meese.

You must never cancel out.
You must never eat a trout.
You must eat fleas.
You must avoid the breeze.

You must follow my logic.
You must never do anything neurologic.
You must ignore when I cheat rhyme.
You must ignore it every time.

You must never go wacky.
You must wear things that are tacky.
You must lick a yellow door.
You must never do a chore.

You must ignore this.
You must have bliss.
You must think I'm insane.
You must never whack people with a cane.

Don't you love my dictation? Doesn't it cause you elation? Are you a dictator at your sea? No wiggle room for anyone near thee? That would drive the cat bonkers. Like those stupid horn honkers. Yeah, we here you but the traffic is still slow. They can get flipped more than a crow. You can dictate that. Trust the cat. Now that my dictation is through for you, class, you can leave whatever you want for my little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Saturday, December 15, 2018

In The Works From Many Clerks!

The cat will let you in on things today. You may even want to give them a replay. A re-read maybe that should be? I'll leave that up to thee.

I'm not working.
No driving or clerking.
But things are still there.
In the works, so beware.

How can it be in?
Do they stand or spin?
What are they in?
What is they at one's bin?

Should that be who?
I'll answer it for you.
It is in the works.
That saying has perks.

A year later and not done.
I was out having fun.
Vague it can be.
But it's in the works for thee.

I promised more.
You need something to give an encore.
So I searched far and wide.
This will make you beam with pride.

A blog post is in the works.
Boy, this does have perks.
Your blog has a post in the works.
Even if you are one of those "great post" jerks.

A sequel is in the works.
That ought to get some smirks.
A remake is also in the works.
It may add one or two new quirks.

News is in the works.
Mostly they'll talk about jerks.
Commercials are in the works.
Actually nearby it lurks.

Stuck in your head is in the works.
Hey, jingles have perks.
Have to feed those clerks.
Hmm so in the works?

Wouldn't it already be out?
If you can hear the shout?
So would that be out of the works?
That just killed all the perks.

Do you have anything in the works? Can it be in the works if you aren't working and instead out enjoying life's perks? What kind of working is actually being had? Do all these questions about working make you mad? Don't worry, I have another post in the works. It will have my same old quirks. I may throw in a new one or go super crass. Probably not though, with my quirky little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Friday, December 14, 2018

Done Yet Not Has A Plot!

The cat is done posting. Yep, all done where we are hosting. I'm done, I say. Don't tell me another way. I said I was done. Can't you see today's run?

I'm done. I'm done.
Now time for fun.
Jump and cheer.
Wiggle that rear.

The laundry is done.
I've washed every one.
The dishes are done.
I've taken my run.

I've used the loo.
Cleaned the litter box too.
Did the shower.
Paid the bill for power.

Oh hell, I paid them all.
Bills are done at my hall.
I've watched some TV.
I've slept at my sea.

I've decorated the tree.
I've finished writing to thee.
I'm done cooking.
I'm done cat video looking.

I'm done. I'm done.
Now time for fun.
Jump and cheer.
What? How can that be near?

More laundry to do?
But done shined through.
More dishes to wash?
Oh my gosh.

I still have to go.
That I should really know.
More bills to pay?
But I did that the other day.

The cat buried more shit?
Damn, can't that stop it?
The tree needs to be decorated again next year?
Why oh why wasn't that clear.

I'm not done. I'm not done.
Where is my fun?
I can't leap and cheer.
Is that more dishes to fear?

Ever say you are done like it is a final run? Yeah, that will never come due. Sorry, always dishes and laundry at your zoo. Unless you eat off the floor and become a nudist at your shore. Then you may get rid of two of those. Could let you strike a happy pose. I never said I was done for good. I said I was done at my hood. Done this post and it's done yet not done sass. You can't stop my little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Thursday, December 13, 2018

The Christmas Date For A Merry Mate!

The cat will help you out once more. I know you may need someone in which to explore. There are a few here to choose from for you. Heck, you may even get two. I pity you, if that is true.

I am looking for someone who will accent my life
Would that be British or French or Jamaican to avoid strife?
rather go out and adventure into the woods for hours then go out on a date
Wowee, you know going into the woods never ends well, right, mate?

Fun loving girl! Enjoy the brighter side of life :D Fun loving girl!
We got it the first time that you gave it a whirl.
Just broke up with my by of 2 yrs. Ready to get my feet wet again
So you stopped walking by deserts at your den?

Back in town, working.
Out of town, clerking.
Want to know more just shoot me 
Anywhere specific on thee?

Low stress and high energy, patient
If you don't get your pills do you get impatient?
want to love the way a harmonica does
I think I'll pass on slobber just because

I would much rather start with coffee and small chit chat rather than sex
So the option is there to umm flex?
No need to tell anything unless we meet
Didn't I just bump into you on the street?

Please have pics of you message me
That sounds counterproductive at my sea.
I want you to want me
And I want a lottery winning spree.

Send me pics of your dog
Pffft here's one of the cat's brown log.
I'm open to dateing, but not really rushing into it
Do you flip flop a bit?

Outdoors. Gym. Work. 
Chores. Earthworm Jim. Perk.
I'm a lot to handle but that's why u have 2 hands.
Also I have two fingers to flip off demands.

Married woman looking to meet new friends.
Anyone want to guess how this ends?
I GET ANGERY WHEN GUYS JUST WANT SEX
Damn, are you the Hulk under some kind of hex?

Stop using fake pics
Can you tell the fakes with a few clicks?
I like420Animals
I suppose it beats 420cannibals.

See any that you like? Maybe love could strike. They could help you out and you could catch a trout. They say plenty of fish and all of that. Don't you love the cat? I'm here helping you each day. At least today at my bay. There may be one or three there for you. What's a married woman to do? Yeah, on that we always take a pass. These are all scary to my little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Wednesday, December 12, 2018

The Very Returns For Holiday Earns!

The holidays sure bring about a lot. A lot of crap over which many fought. Had to have this or that. But that was done by the cat. This time one word returns to all and it is sure out there having a ball.

It's that time of year.
The time to watch where you steer.
The time to stay clear.
The time when nuts are near.

The crazies are out.
At you they shout.
They may even honk.
Watch for a head conk.

But aren't they always out?
Yep, out and about.
They have to eat.
Out for a treat.

So comes the word.
The word for the absurd.
It adds to the task.
May depend on who you ask.

Very crazy at play.
Very crazy until Christmas day.
Very likely the case.
Very likely they keep up the pace.

But they still give you a wish,
While trying to get turkey to dish.
And a Very Merry Christmas to you.
Does very makes it more fun to view?

I've got a very lot to do.
So more than usual at your zoo?
Does a lot need a very?
Oh, you're very merry.

What does that look like?
Like Santa on a hike?
He may be very sweaty.
May need some spaghetti.

A very good sale.
So a good sale hits fail?
Did you look into it more?
It may very well be a rip off store.

I'm very sure of it.
I'm very busy for a bit.
I'm very, very in the holiday mood.
You know, you are very rude.

Do you use very a lot this time of year? Many sure give very a cheer. How can you be very in a lot of those cases? Doesn't a lot cover most of the very bases? Doesn't the likes of merry go without needing a very? If you were good or okay, then maybe very could come to play. Did I think about this very much? Nah, just a touch. I very much wanted to let very have some sass. So I very well let it happen from my little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Tuesday, December 11, 2018

A Depiction For All On The Wall!

The depiction of the cat. It is as easy as that. I say and rhyme. I show time to time. That is the one, the one you take and run. Or at least your mind takes. Then it bakes and bakes.

Time to depict.
Forget the conflict.
Depiction is key.
Then it flies free.

I want your vote.
So stand and take note.
I have a family of three.
We are as happy as can be.

I shake hands with babies.
I give lots of maybes.
I keep your hopes high.
Raise your fist to the sky.

I want that job.
Forget about poor Bob.
I am the one for the task.
I have an answer for everything you ask.

I can't do it, really.
But shhh, ignore that dealy.
See? I can't even spell.
But hire me, what the hell.

I drew this art.
Can't get it at Walmart.
It's the true Easter Bunny.
It will be worth lots of money.

See all the clones?
It was copied by drones.
It truly is the best.
My depiction passes the test.

I want that thingy.
For you it will be stingy.
It should be mine.
For you it won't align.

For you it will break.
For you it will...oh for Heaven's sake.
I just want it.
Hand me that shit.

Depict it for me.
Depict it for we.
I say it with conviction,
So just fall for the depiction.

Do you fall for the depiction? Do you treat it like a prediction? So many depict this and that and usually they are full of strat. Or scat. Or shit at that. See? Now I created a depiction of the depicting nuts. Did we just fall into depicting ruts? I better depict the songs of the singing bass. Those will stop you from thinking about the depiction of my depicting the depictors with my little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Monday, December 10, 2018

It's Not Too Late, Mate!

This is said to many a human mass. They say it to every class. Although usually the ones down lower, they want them to be a grower. Who are they? Bah, some aliens that are grey. Okay? Now let's play.

It's never too late.
Nope, not on this date.
You have plenty of time.
So go drop that dime.

Oh, they are dead?
Had a brain tumor in the head?
I'm sorry to hear that.
I guess that date fell flat.

It's never too late.
Open that front gate.
Let them all in.
Listen to how you'll win.

A deal for me?
I want it from thee.
Oh, my money has gone.
I fell for too many a con.

It's never too late.
Look at that plate.
Don't you want to eat it up?
I bet you'll like what's in the cup.

Why are you in here puking?
Sanitation you are surely nuking.
You waited a whole week before eating?
Damn, you're going to take a beating.

It's never too late.
This is your fate.
The fate given to you.
We sure don't know by who.

Come and buy.
We tell no lie.
Whoops, we sold the house yesterday.
Time you were on your way.

It's never too late.
Look at this common trait.
The trait of the stupid.
Awww, but then there's cupid.

It's never too late.
Too late to deflate.
For sometimes it is.
Whoops, spoiler alert for the never too late biz.

Do you think it is never too late? Hmm, would you want a dead mate? I think the cat just proved that wrong with ease. You humans make it a breeze. Some things it sure is too late for. Maybe even getting into a non 24 hour store. Something as simple as that can come to pass. But, unless you're dead, then its never too late to read my little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Sunday, December 9, 2018

Comes Right In For The Win!

The cat got warm the other day. Being out in the cold for 8 hours sucks at any bay. But the warmth came back. So nice to be inside a shack. And one with no outside loo. Hey, I've seen as few of those still being used too. Country living at its best. Or not, you decide on the outhouse fest.

Cold as can be.
That would be me.
But warmth comes in.
Let the heater spin.

It takes its time.
Can't warm on a dime.
But it gets there.
Ahhh, hot air.

A rush of warm air.
Umm, did I speak unfair?
Wasn't I clear?
Can you even hear?

A rush to retort.
Are you making a report?
Should we just abort?
You may come up short.

A rush to deny the short.
Yeah, I really hate, Mort.
He's just so short and mean.
He creates such a scene.

A rush to be sarcastic.
Aren't I fantastic?
I'm just the best.
I can pass any test.

A rush to get a full head.
I think you need to rethink what you said.
Some empty space may be up there.
The MRI said so at our lair.

A rush to prove me wrong.
Are you putting it to song?
It might be quite the rush.
Come on and go for it, mush.

A rush to put me down.
Did it make you frown?
But you're still up?
I think you had a hiccup.

A rush to prove me wrong.
Is this the chorus of the song.
Hey, at least I'm warm now.
This rushing thing is really wow.

Do you think rush has lost its meaning? Maybe the dictionary needs a re-screening. Do you rush warmth at your sea? Do you really rush it and have it work for thee? How can you get warm in a rush? Jump in the shower or get frisky with a lush? Hmm, it may work a bit. Still wouldn't say you can rush it. The cold even holds back the green grass. You can't rush that or the warmth of my little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Saturday, December 8, 2018

A Rest For Head Has To Be Said!

The cat was resting here, just resting to be clear, and then someone said, "I see you're resting your head." Hmm is that all they could see? Beats the heck out of me.

Stretch and relax.
Ignore the email and fax.
Is the latter still a thing?
Bah, ignore it for this fling.

Let your eyes drift.
Don't make those lids lift.
Just let them go.
Oh, a noise at the window.

Can I come in?
No, go take a spin.
I see you were resting your head.
Yeah, so go bug club med.

Can I come in?
No, go suck on gin.
I see you were resting...
Are you umm testing?

What about my back?
Does rest for that lack?
Does rest for my ass not pass?
Is it because of the gas.

What about my finger?
Oh look, it can linger.
I guess that didn't want rest.
It must stay up the best.

What about my toe?
Do you give 4 out of 5 a no?
What about my ears?
Do they count or are they like rears?

Can my arm rest too?
You know an arm rest is a thing at each zoo.
But, nope, just my head.
Have you gone to club med?

Maybe just the med part.
Did you take it to heart?
Fine I won't come in.
Great. Go rob a cookie tin.

Now I will rest.
Rest is the best.
Rest one and all.
Even my snip snip no ball.

One way to make interlopers go away. Rant on about something stupid at your bay. Ever think of that though? Where does the rest of your body go? Does everything stay up all the time? Bah, blue balls, so the cat is told, is a crime. What? It would have no rest. Oh what came to my mind from an unwanted guest. I will now rest my sass and go rest up for tomorrow's with my little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Friday, December 7, 2018

The Off Days Catch Your Gaze!

These days there is a way less set pace. I just gave a these days embrace. See? The cat uses such things too, even after I make fun at my zoo. These days that is the norm. Oh, look, a crappy storm.

Work has come.
Work has gone.
Don't be dumb,
That's a con.

A con for some.
A con for many.
Some are glum.
Some don't have any.

Holidays to come.
Holidays to go.
Work off your bum,
Even in the snow.

Cancelled a task.
Cancelled a ferry.
Some grab a flask,
Others get hairy.

Out they go.
Work the shift.
No matter the show.
No matter how swift.

Days to hold.
Days to use.
Treat them like gold,
Until lighting the fuse.

Oops, too late.
Can't have you off.
Sorry, there mate.
No need to scoff.

Use them later.
Like maybe next year.
Don't be a hater.
Don't give me that peer.

This is how it goes.
You must work for pay.
So get to those rows.
Go and slave away.

Your life is determined.
Determined by we.
You once were a sperm and...
Then you were set not so free.

Ever have to work in a place like that? Where you could have vacation days up to bat, but then nope, can't have those. We'll give them to the crows. Ever have to work on holidays too? So many workers still on the go no matter what comes due. Can be easy to miss how many have to go. The world has to keep on a turning, you know. At least for the human mass. I get every day off with my feline little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Thursday, December 6, 2018

Now It Is A Perk That Must Work!

The time has come to do, after a long long time of making it shoo. Or maybe just a long long time of ignoring it. I think you get that it has been a long long time for a long long bit.

The time to do.
The time is true.
The time for two.
I haven't a clue.

It's just time.
Now in my prime.
No hills to climb.
Can drop that dime.

Did this and that.
Chewed the fat.
Didn't go splat.
Even when a gnat.

But I won't be.
Nope, not me.
Now's the time, you see.
The time for me.

Gnat is gone.
You aren't a pawn.
It's a new dawn.
Can mow my own lawn.

I'll do it this way.
I've gotten my pay.
I've caused some dismay.
But now nice I'll play.

I'm here for you.
You can believe it to be true.
I'll stick like glue.
Only for a few years I made you blue.

Forget all of that.
Today's where it is at.
I threw away the gnat.
I got a nifty new hat.

The path is clear.
You've nothing to fear.
Don't shed a tear.
Forget the past year.

No oh me, oh my.
That doesn't apply.
I will at least try.
Don't get your hopes too high.

Those that burn bridges sure are grand. Don't you love when they come back and extend a hand? Then they think the right way should now apply. No matter what before they gave a try. They got to where they are now doing this and that, they may have even treated others like scat, but now all is fine because your and their way of doing things does align. Do you let that come to pass? Pffft is all they get from my little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Wednesday, December 5, 2018

A Monthly Cheer Without Fat Guys Near!


Time for cheer.
Or so they say.
Go ear to ear,
Come what may.

It's holiday bliss.
Yep, that's it.
Pucker up for a kiss.
Can't have a fit.

Just for weeks.
Just for now.
No real streaks.
Don't have a cow.

Save it for later.
Then let it come.
Even if you fall in a crater,
You can't be glum.

Turn it around.
It is holiday magic.
It can be found.
No matter how tragic.

Kind of a trick.
Kind of a mindset.
Think it some slick.
Nothing but net.

Not really real.
Ignore all of that.
For it's the real deal.
It's where it's at.

It's got a lot.
A lot of play.
Good it was caught.
Oh the dismay.

Whoops, happy thoughts.
Think them for now.
Think them lots.
Can't raise an eyebrow.

Keep the mindset.
Keep it firm.
For it's a safe bet,
That it's only short term.

So holiday "magic" can turn your frown upside down? Wow, look what Santa can do when he comes to town. But you can't do it the other 11 months out of the year? Does your vision become clear? The insecure stuff shall return, but you can make it burn. Just like that mindset of "magic" and smiles, you can take it further and stretch it miles. A perky day in the other eleven months too. March has "magic" as well, who knew? Do you get all cheery only when this month comes to pass? You can stretch it out and trust my little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Tuesday, December 4, 2018

Available Today Or Not At Play!

The cat is available to make this rhyme. At least when I'm doing so at this time. The time is 6:17 PM Atlantic, if you must know. My availability may change by the time this is given a go.

Today is the day.
Today you go out to play.
You got everything ready.
Then the phone rings steady.

Are you available?
This thing is salable.
I need you here.
You availability must be clear.

Are you available?
I don't care if you are bailable.
I want you in here now.
So you better get here somehow.

Are you available?
This sale is scalable.
You can sell with ease.
This one is a breeze.

Are you available?
You clearly are mailable.
So answer and get here.
Your availability is clear.

Are you available?
An offense may be jailable.
You better respond.
Or be in the great beyond.

Are you available?
This may leave you unbailable.
Then in a cell you'll rot.
You won't like its cot.

Are you available?
This may soon become unsalable.
Get here and get it done.
I don't care about your fun.

Are you available?
Me? No, I'm unavailable.
I've gone out to enjoy the day.
Get there and make the sale, okay?

Today was the day.
Today you were going to play.
Today your availability changed.
Today got rearranged.

Don't you love that? Are you available where you are at? Love how it usually means get here stat and/or your plans are going to fall flat? Then those asking usually want to do something that they want. Don't those words try to haunt? Do you answer yes or no, or just ignore and out the door you go? We're available when we are supposed to be for a work pass. On the rest, it depends when you catch my mostly unavailable little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Monday, December 3, 2018

On The Rise Without A Jolly Disguise!

The fat guy is jolly. He has some sort of holly. Whether that is Holly or not. I don't want to think of such eye rot. But jolly and fat. Seems to be where it is at. Unless you were creepy thin Santa Claus. He doesn't get an applause.

Jolly and fat.
How about that.
Look at the stat.
Increase is where it's at.

Obesity on the rise.
The news gives such cries.
Kids not on the go.
Look at that screen glow.

Pictures are shown.
Them and their phone.
Them there eating.
They say it needs beating.

A story of the week.
Out it shall leak.
Some health report thing.
The same old ring.

Know and known.
A familiar tone.
On the rise and blah blah.
But we don't see a ha ha.

No jolly and fat?
What's with that?
Santa loves it that way.
His twinkle shall stay.

Shouldn't all be cheery?
So cheery that it is eerie?
For he is so caring.
Presents and sharing.

Animals like him.
Him and his fat limb.
Or would that be limbs?
Hey, the light never dims.

So why so bad?
Glee should be had.
Uninterrupted glee across the land.
Being large is grand.

Obesity on the rise.
Allowing it is wise.
We'll make the world a cheery place.
Just look at the smile on that fat, jolly Santa's face.

The cat just solved the problems of the world. No more fists will be hurled. All will live in glee. Just let obesity rise from sea to sea. Forget heart attacks, diabetes, and the like. They can take a hike. We want to be jolly like that fat guy, having a twinkle in our eye. Can you tell I'm a sarcastic cat? Hey, the two molded as I thought of that. I had to let it come to pass. I think I'll twinkle my in shape little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Sunday, December 2, 2018

So That's Where Really Doesn't Care!

What is the point in the know if you never intend to go? Maybe you intend to run? Beats the heck out of me under any sun. Hey, I know where that is. I can pass that sunny quiz.

Here we are.
By train or car.
Not by plane.
That's just a pain.

Or maybe truck.
What the fluck.
There they are.
Get back in the car.

So they live there.
I was never aware.
Do I really care?
Nope, but they live there.

They live everywhere.
But we've done that to spare.
But they live there.
But's and there's to spare.

Did you know?
Blow for blow.
Repeat the task,
With each you ask.

They live there.
Living to spare.
I never knew that.
That's where they are at.

Did you know?
Blow for blow.
Repeat the repeat.
It's ever so sweet.

Wait. You knew?
That can't be true.
You go and visit?
Don't pop, pop, fizz it.

I know you lie.
I'm the in the know guy.
They live there.
And I really don't care.

But now I know.
I told you so.
You may, but I don't care.
I just know that they live there.

Did you care? No? But...but...they live there. Pfffffffffffffft says the cat. Who cares where someone you haven't seen in years, barely know, etc. stays at. Unless you want to avoid them in mass. Then you can take that pass. Ever get anyone who just keeps telling everyone because they are soooooooooooo surprised by it? Did they expect them to live in a dirt pit? Heard it over and over and over again from some lass. Whoopdi friggin doo sure came out of my little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Saturday, December 1, 2018

A Scary Thin Guy Let's A Load Fly!

First I have to show me. It is my sea. We don't want to spoil the surprise. You may want to avert thy eyes. A scary thin one. Looks like...well you'll see at the end of this run.


I'm upon high.
Can really see this guy.
When did he lose weight?
Is he trying to mate?

There is an old lady.
Maybe Santa is umm shady.
We really don't want to know.
So wrong at our show.

Does he have to go?
He can sure get rather low.
Where does he go in the night?
Is using homeowners' bathrooms all right?

Is that mutt chewing his boot?
Can he turn him into a newt.
Now that would be cool.
Hey, he is a magical fool.

A Hallmark event.
Hmm titled Get Bent.
May not pass the censor crowd.
The PTA would yell rather loud.

Child services may sic him.
Not proper and prim.
All kinds of wrong.
Santa really is a ding dong.

The poop machines look.
They may think him a crook.
But all they do is stare.
I guess they don't care.

From up here I can see.
It may be a load under the tree.
Can't blame the mutt.
Santa needs to go to another hut.

What am I saying?
Right, you haven't seen it displaying.
Get ready to view.
I may as well burn it into your mind too.


So was the cat right?
Had he held it all night?
Is that really a load?
Boy, Santa is sure in scary mode.

Ever see a Santa like that? Any guesses who it is under that hat? The cat is too busy rolling his eyes to even tell. The poop machines' expressions were clearly, "what the hell?" At least they didn't scream and hurt my ears with their first Santa pass. Nope, he'll never get to use the litter box of my little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.