Wednesday, October 5, 2011

Warning! The Second Part Might Not Be For The Faint of Heart!

So some might have guessed yesterday's dVerse rant I gave and others are still in a cave. But after the next little bit, you will surely realize what caused my fit. You may regret such information though, just so you know.

Okay, what was my previous one truly about? What caused me to scratch and shout? A certain aspect off Pat, that was quite funny to the cat. For it seems I gave him a flea or some other bug came to visit the other night with glee. It must not have been satisfied with his feet or knee, as it walked all free.

Let's just say it continued to pass and went straight for the ass. Yes, a bug bit Pat on the ass and it caused quite the sass. I guess the bug was such a flirt, that it really hurt. For it did not do it just once or twice. It made him pay a hefty price.

I think it got stuck and went right to town, chowing down. Then of course Pat scratched in his sleep and made it run that much more deep. If you thought it could not get sicker, here is the kicker. If you play connect the dots on the bite spots. It forms a heart. Seriously, wtf? Did it want him to have a heart fart?

Did it get confused and think it was Valentine's day? Thought he needed a tattoo down that way. All he needed it to say was some girls name and that insect would have gotten fame. Would have been funny if it said mom, the cat would have laughed and then some.

I guess nothing is sacred to that bug as it left a heart and acted all smug. If one did not know any better, you would swear that symbol was left there like a letter. To say "nah nah I got you and now my meal is through."

So from Pat to all of you, if you ever want to give your heart away never bite or paste it with glue, to someone elses ass, not lad or lass. As it gives off quite the itch and one will bitch, as it rides like a hitch and one can feel it when sitting like a stitch.

Were those facts too much for you? Even worse they are all true. Told you, you might not have wanted to know about the ass biting bug that left a heart all aglow. TMI is never sanctioned here in the cat's blogosphere. Yes, I know what you are thinking too that the cat has a loose screw and that I am a perve that has some nerve.

But you people see the pets bare behind all the time. So where is the crime? We see yours big deal, although some can be blinding and unreal. The cat will not go there. I will just go back to licking my hair. Thus it has come to pass, Pat now know how it feels when a flea bites my little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

40 comments:

  1. yep, some bugs always go straight for the ass ... I wish I had them in my place :P

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  2. HA!!! I was right! And I even left comments giving little hints as to my guess -- which Pat caught -- without tipping off anyone else. (References to "Raid" and "bug")

    And it looks like my comment will be first, too, if I hit "Post Comment" soon enough...

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  3. Oh, well... Second. But I still guessed it.

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  4. haha I'm sure I can go on a search
    Find it and mail it to your perch
    Give you a good bite
    Then you'll wish you never asked for sucha plight..haha

    Yes I knew you knew as well
    From the little hints that fell
    Stupid damn bugs
    Probably hiding under the rugs..haha

    Almost first
    Just 2 minute too late with your burst

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  5. I was not totally wrong either, something to do with YKW.

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  6. I am thinking I need to go and read your previous post Pat.

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  7. dude...what a sick bug, to bite your caboose, fiends like that should not be on the loose to leave love notes while you sleep, whata creep...

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  8. haha yes you mentiont he ykw
    Refering to the cats butt
    So I knew you had a clue
    About what was really true

    haha the previous one is all profound
    Plus has such a confusing sound

    haha yes sick bug indeed
    Fueled by greed
    Having to take more than it's share
    So unfair

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  9. hahaha my behind doesn't like the nudge
    So it can be the judge..haha

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  10. Ok, first off..I did guess right yesterday, I swear!! Second off, when I read about the heart shaped bug bite, you might me burst out in laughter. That loud laugh got me dirty looks from two neighboring co-workers! hahaha Love this!

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  11. hahahaha working and lurking can have some side effects
    As once laughter ensues and those around detects
    Dirty looks you will find
    But I just keep going and let them kiss my behind
    Oh maybe that's what the bug thought literally
    I believe, maybe haha, that you caught on to me

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  12. Have a heart! At the right place
    Man is generous and willing to listen
    Tattoo to the butt that's the craze
    Fat chance you get to do so that often

    Hank

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  13. That's what I thought! Hook line and sinker, this story I bought. No fun to have such pain in the behind, I'll now excuse myself if you don't mind.

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  14. i know what's it's like to get a bite at night
    it's cause for temper and even fright
    i contemplate my alternatives and the meanest thing i just might
    but in the end i usually do nothing but what's most light

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  15. As "sacred ground" would I have guessed,
    your muse to be a special pest?
    Or with such flare and great pizzazz
    it found some pleasure in Pat's azz
    Creepy crawlies under the sheet
    bring me to wake and on my feet.
    So cats get abandoned to the hall.
    There they can sleep, fleas 'n all....

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  16. I am allergic to so many bugs that bite! My rear would be twice the size by now.

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  17. haha yeah heart on the butt
    Is for a complete nut
    Heard of on your sleeve
    But the butt is nothing but a pet peeve
    Oh that was good
    Use that I should

    you went fishing with my little tale
    As the bug made me swear and wail
    Hear you get many bugs doing that too
    haha yes you may be excused from my zoo

    Yeah I run my trap
    Let my lips flap
    But the damn thing is gone
    Before I can even spawn
    So there we are
    Both left doing nothing while the bugs tended bar..haha

    Yes sacred ground is where my muse was found
    Like an itching hound
    But my foot can't go they theirs can
    Not that agile of a man..haha
    I'd never chase them away though
    At least not straight out at my show
    As I know the little things that will irk and send them away
    So I can chase them off night or day

    hahaha oh that would not me pleasant
    You could go around like a parading peasant..haha

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  18. Boy was I ever off- Thinking all dark thoughts and dismay- Well I guess that all applies, but, no pun intended there, dismay in a very different way- Went back to read it and wow how clear it is- Love how poetry can make the mind think in altered paths- Damn bug, know how it feels with four furballs dancing around here- No matter how well you take care of them- those damn fleas somehow hops on through- Very frustrating too- but at least, to look on the positive side, at least this one had a crush on you- could have been worse- as other words or symbols could be cursed-

    And this poem- has what some things have- the ability to force fake itch feelings along the legs- which you have to scratch-

    Glad you explained it, because I never would have figured the "real" meaning out on my own-

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  19. Yes yikes indeed
    Least it didn't bleed..haha

    hahaha yes off by a bit
    But I'm sure eventually you would have hit
    The meaning behind
    Well what bit my behind and thought it was a great find
    Yeah there always seem to be a few
    That linger about no matter what is done by you
    Mine get them when they go visit the huge pack
    Who Orlin tend to crack
    It is interesting how much can be read into such things
    As everyone shapes their own wings

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  20. I think my butt is the only place I haven't been bitten.
    They've gotten me where some might think I need a lickin'.
    Oh Dear Lord I'm one filthy lass.
    God will get me for all my sass.

    Love,
    Lola

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  21. haha such dirty talk from you
    What am I to do
    But I did open the door
    With tmi not being valid at my shore
    So you can just deal with God one day
    And see what he thinks of your dirty say..haha

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  22. that was an epic tongue twisting read.

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  23. I think the heart said thanks for the snack
    as he went on the munching attack.
    This is quite funny...
    a heart where it isn't sunny.
    You just couldn't make this stuff up!
    Your life is getting crazier than mine
    Thanks for the laugh, oh so sublime.
    hahaha.

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  24. haha I liked that one too
    Thanks for backing it up and joining the heart fart liking crew...haha

    Tongue twisting you say
    Oh you have not seen nothing yet at my bay..haha

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  25. hahaha Oh with my mind
    I could make stuff up about my behind
    But it is so much better when it is real
    Although better it did not feel..haha
    Crazier then yours you say
    Damn you have to step it up at your bay
    At least it was thankful for the snack
    Stupid thing left an has never come back
    So maybe it did rot
    Or died because it was full and too hot

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  26. Oh you could make it up for sure
    I've read your books. Remember, dear?
    Your imagination has no end
    but reality always wins.
    That's what makes it all the more fun
    and amazing when the reading is done!

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  27. Hi Pat, just to let you know I nominated you for this award:
    Versatile Bloggers Award

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  28. haha yes I knew you would know
    That I could make it up on the go
    But this reality none should want
    As for a few days, at least, it does haunt
    And it is quite fun to read
    But you don't want it to happen so take heed..haha

    An award you say
    I'll have to have a look your way

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  29. I got stung by a bee today.
    It didn't cause too much dismay
    Just hurt a little and stung one time
    Not shaped like a heart like yours so sublime.
    Was just a little sweat bee
    and didn't get in my undies.
    Like someone else I know
    who said it on his show.
    lol.

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  30. I missed reading your previous post.. I guess I gotta read it now ;)

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  31. Bee stings are no fun at all
    Haven't had one of them in years at my hall
    But then I'd take one
    Over a ton
    On my rear
    And yes I had to go and give it a cheer..haha
    Or rather Orlin did
    Since he looked and is such a perverted little kid
    errr umm cat
    That's all from Pat

    haha yes one could be out of the loop a bit
    But you can still easily catch on to my fit

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  32. Aha!
    a graphfleati artist left its design -
    a heart tattooed behind!
    I'm sure it done done
    only in fun.
    a gesture by jester,
    a flea-ting impesture,
    undercover, in the dark, in your bed.
    But never let graphfleati go to the head.

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  33. hahaha oh but he could have done with out the nagging pain
    At least it did nto pop a vein
    Before it left it's mark
    And had a park
    On my behind
    Leaving me itchy as I go to the work grind

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  34. haha yes those stupid things
    And their buggy flings

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  35. It might seem funny now, but those damn bugs are not nice!
    I got bitten & infected in the leg by mosquitoes while on vacation and ended up in hospital for two weeks, so I can relate.
    Glad it wasn't anything freaky..then again, might have been a freaky bug...sorry! ;-)

    Wishing you a speedy recovery, my friend.

    P.S. do you see how freaky we all are that we had to come back to find out the answer?! (lol)

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  36. hahaha never thought about it that much
    But yes some are freaky as they stay in touch
    Damn those bugs can really be a pain
    2 weeks in the hospital would make me pop a vein
    Yeah it wasn't overly freaky at all
    Just a stupid bug/flea that on my behind it had a ball..haha

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