Sunday, March 16, 2014

Me, Endorse? Sure, Without Remorse!

So every once in a while the cat gets an email that goes to the delete pile. It says such and such a product is so great that I should endorse it at my gate. Wow, it must be oh so grand that they have to bug a cat to plug it at his land. But just for today, I'll give it a go at my bay.

Look a this!
It causes bliss.
It is oh so great.
How can others relate.

Here is a review,
That is oh so true.
What? It's not a plot.
The review was not bought.

33% of all reviews on the net may be.
But this review is oh so true at our sea.
Just put it with your post,
And give a link to our coast.

That is all you need to do.
Oh yeah, and endorse it too.
You can't give a bad review.
That just will not do.

If it is a bad one.
Ignore it a ton.
Don't tell one and all.
We want a great cat call.

We still want you to tell the truth,
Just the good kind at your booth.
The bad kind goes away,
Did we mention we will pay?

Yeah, pay for a great review.
Wait! That isn't true.
We will just pay you,
For a look and review.

The pay is just an incentive from us.
No need for a paid review fuss.
But there may be more if it is grand,
And you help us sell in our land.

So endorse us today.
Get your pay.
Help us sell.
Who cares if it is sucky as hell.

We just want the dough,
Thanks to your rhyming flow.
We only sent this email for help to you too.
The million others don't mean as much, it's true.

Did I just endorse such emails at me sea? Or did I just burn them down with glee? I will go with the second one. They are all robots anyway under their sun. No way hosa is what comes to pass when they bother my little rhyming ass.

Enjoy your winter, smash a printer.


  1. Replies
    1. Now it's #2
      Slowly through!


    2. Back once more
      On a streak at my shore

  2. It is just not worth a bother
    Tell them to lay off, brother
    No review today
    Come another day
    Maybe will then try to ponder


    1. They would come back though
      If I said another day at my show haha

  3. ha. endorsements are what they are worth
    the money paid for their birth
    same reason i dont put a lot of stock in amazon reviews
    as everyone gets friends to spew
    and then you buy it and come face to face
    with the abuse

    1. Getting paid a ton
      Works under my sun
      But just a little bit
      Won't be a hit
      33% of all amazon reviews are fake
      So right not to partake

  4. Get a celeb to endorse
    Easier will be their hand to force
    If a famed one uses it, must be ok
    Like a fairy godmother, she'll save the day

    1. Yeah the more fame on has to share
      The more they will make people aware
      So use away
      Like the famous folks on display

  5. An interesting piece that I enjoyed reading. Well done.

    Thank you. Love love, Andrew. Bye.

  6. What if kitty got asked to do a great three story cat scratching house? Or a pedestal eating plate (I saw one recently and laughed)? I think that'd be awesome. :)

    1. a pedestal eating plate?
      That may be a nice fate
      The cat scratching house he'd take
      Then the review surely wouldn't be fake

  7. Someone told me once, that if I saw a cock roach crawling across the floor, I could write a story about it. YOU can rhyme about anything. Great job.

    Oh and here's one for you. I received an email from a man who said he and his wife want to share their fortune with me. All I had to do was email him back.

    1. Can rhyme anything at my sea
      Easy as can be
      And yeah got that email too
      Seems they want to share with every zoo

  8. Paid to review means it is usually crappy

    1. More than likely the way
      At each and every bay

  9. That was a very nice review of the review of the reviews!

    1. Going into the review of the review of the reviews zone
      Twilight Zone may get jealous at the tone

  10. The only way you should do a review
    is if you believe in it at your zoo
    make sure there something in it for you
    how do you know which review is true
    buy the product you might be blue
    some are helpful & to that I say thank you..

    1. Some are helpful indeed
      But many are fake at many a feed
      33% of reviews on the internet are fake
      So be careful in what you partake

  11. Spam emails I delete with glee
    They won't get a review from me
    Into the trash they go right away
    Before they cause me dismay :)

    1. Yep, that is the way
      Except the cat can have fun at his bay
      Bury them in the litterbox
      That will curl their socks

  12. I've gotten a lot of review requests, but nobody has ever offered to pay me. Sounds like your pad is a spam magnet.

    1. Oh spam I get indeed
      I was offered to be paid a few times at my feed
      But for some of them no way
      Unless they offer me tons of pay

  13. Say you'll do it, just charge them triple

  14. I have gotten a few as well. But I just delete them

  15. I've been asked for reviews, but never to be paid for them. You're special, Pat:)

  16. Oops, I take that back. I did get one.

    1. Damn, not special after all
      I'll go mope down the hall

  17. What? You mean I am not the only best blogger who was asked to endorse the greatest new energy hogger? I thought I was so great, but now I see that riches for reviews aren't my fate. Alas, thanks for that, Rhyming Ass.

    1. Glad i could show you the light
      Hopefully you don't want to fight

  18. When you bury those emails you dread
    make sure you don't hit Gloria in the head!

    1. hahaha she make give me an oh dear
      If sand in her mouth isn't near

  19. I do not endorse, no, not I
    on this my space
    those similar emails get deleted too
    and all memories of them erased.

    Will do a book review if I choose to
    on my terms, but won't advertise nor endorse, nor hold any type of contest unless it is of my choosing.


    1. Yep, that is the way
      Choice yourself at your bay
      Unless they offer tons of pay
      Then I'd wing it I'd say
      I can be bought
      It just takes a lot lol

  20. Sounds like the price of fame
    It's all the same:
    Everyone wants their cut
    To get out of their fiscal rut
    But work for it? That they refuse
    When all your work they'd rather use
    To sell their stuff here at your site
    And bring them big bucks and fame.
    Yeah, right.


    1. Yeah right is the way
      To go about it at your bay
      Tell them to take a hike
      Not gonna give them a fake like

  21. Well, I have become more and more skeptical of endorsements. They are so easy to do on the internet, I always think that people are finding a way to endorse their own things....and, Pat, good for you for resisting being paid for things on your feed. I had those commercials I see on people's feeds.

    1. Yeah, there is a way
      I know many ways at my bay
      But I reframe as it's kinda under handed to do
      Not that I'm above that at my zoo
      But would rather rhyme
      And not to some commercialized chime

  22. I hate those type e-mails. And it disgusting that Google posts ads at the top emails.

    1. Yeah stupid google is a pain
      With their ads across the train

  23. Ha, it's also happened to me/Mr, would you like to see/the product we have to sell?/My reply? Go to hell! :-)/So, the cat's actually quite polite/Me, I wouldn't give them the time of day... or night!

    Greetings from London.

    1. haha go to hell
      Fits about right where they dwell

  24. Why someone would pay for a review is just so beyond me when so many are willing to give products and books a truthful review for free.

    1. Because the reviews are usually crap
      So they pay to get more across the map

  25. I like free stuff at my zoo
    So I will take a review offer or two.
    Though I get plenty spammed with offers that make me say no way
    If I don't feel it's something we will enjoy, hit delete and walk away.
    I appreciate the offers that pay
    Being a sahm, it's a way to help with the bills at my bay :)

    1. True, keeps the bills paying
      With their review playing

  26. plug something at your sea?
    where's the dough it seems to me.
    better than an email from the king of Nigeria
    leaving you and the cat in hysteria (not really a rhyme:)

    1. haha yeah king abubu
      Has sent me an email a time or two

  27. Pay for review ? Or pay per review.. But thanks no thanks. Do I need to swallow something? Do I need to plug something ? Do I need to disguise myself and go somewhere and drive something back? Thanks no thanks..

    1. haha if it were a lot of pay
      I may do it at my bay
      But it would need to be a lot
      For me to be bought

  28. To endorse
    I'd ask to taste the piece-
    If it's good - send me more...

    1. That could be grand
      If you like to eat in your land

  29. I have barely enough time to review the stuff I actually think I might like.

    1. Time is a factor
      can't review a tractor

  30. I must be a slacka,
    With a real lacka,
    Of endorsing ambition...
    They can go to perdition!

    1. They don't like you
      Slacking at your zoo haha

  31. I am not below offering space on my blog for endorsements. I need the money. :(

    1. They have to pay me a ton
      For my to give that a run

  32. This is jumping the shark territory, Fonz....Because then you write to please the ad people...

    1. Yep, no jumping the shark
      That will leave a mark

  33. Will you ever do political endorsements is paid enough?
    That would be some interesting rhyming stuff

    1. hahahaha oh that would be fun
      Might not like how it's done
      But if paid enough
      I'd do almost any stuff

  34. I don't know why these people think we will endorse anything they are trying to push. Bunch of jerks.